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Children by the million sing for Alex Chilton
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Author Topic: How to end QC  (Read 7078 times)
mustang6172
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« on: October 25, 2009, 12:37:33 AM »

All characters are at Coffee of Doom to celebrate Marten's engagement to Faye after his mutual breakup with Dora.  Dora is celebrating with her new girlfrend, Veronica Vance.  Raven just got her masters degree in physics.  Wil and Penelope have returned from thier honeymoon.  Sven is celebrating his ability to cure Hanners OCD through shock therapy (i.e. sexing her up and such).  Steve is comming out of the closet.  Henry and Maurice happened to come through town while celebrating their aniversary.  Angus is sexing up Marigold in the Restroom of Doom.  Tai and three girls are waiting to use the Restroom of Doom for similar reasons.

Then Pintsize, Winslow, and Momo pilot a giant robotic allosaur into Coffee of Doom killing everyone inside.  Soon after, they have a robotic orgy until everyone's power cells are depleted.

Or at least that's what I would do.
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akronnick
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...is a FRAKKING CYLON!!!!


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« Reply #1 on: October 25, 2009, 12:48:30 AM »

given the rate that time passes it QC, and the fact that Raven just started her undergraduate work in physics, we can expect to see this happen around 2047.
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« Reply #2 on: October 25, 2009, 01:02:13 AM »

Ssh, no spoilers.
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« Reply #3 on: October 25, 2009, 01:07:49 AM »

I thought everyone was going to get hit by a truck.
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« Reply #4 on: October 25, 2009, 02:18:07 AM »

ROCK FALLS EVERYONE DIES
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« Reply #5 on: October 25, 2009, 03:33:05 AM »

I thought everyone was going to get hit by a truck.
Well yeah, but that doesn't have to be the end; you've got a bunch of miraculous survivals there just waiting to happen and it doesn't even have to be the same truck.
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« Reply #6 on: October 25, 2009, 03:37:34 AM »

All characters are at Coffee of Doom to celebrate Marten's engagement to Faye after his mutual breakup with Dora.  Dora is celebrating with her new girlfrend, Veronica Vance.  Raven just got her masters degree in physics.  Wil and Penelope have returned from thier honeymoon.  Sven is celebrating his ability to cure Hanners OCD through shock therapy (i.e. sexing her up and such).
You were good right about there.
« Last Edit: October 25, 2009, 03:41:51 AM by SJCrew » Logged
Kugai
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« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2009, 01:47:43 PM »

The Centauri arrive and enslave everyone.
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James The Kugai

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« Reply #8 on: October 25, 2009, 03:39:35 PM »

But in the last second before the Centauri win, the eagles come and save the day.
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KickThatBathProf
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doin a thing


« Reply #9 on: October 25, 2009, 05:45:55 PM »

EVERYONE HAS SEX WITH EVERYONE ELSE
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LTK
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« Reply #10 on: October 25, 2009, 05:46:00 PM »

Any of these endings will do.
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zagraf
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« Reply #11 on: October 25, 2009, 06:06:20 PM »

The comic will end with...a fart. A fart so enormous it not only obliterates the cast but destroys all Northampton.

The last line of dialogue will be "blugghulughuglhh."
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Carl-E
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« Reply #12 on: October 25, 2009, 07:58:57 PM »

ROCK FALLS EVERYONE DIES

Only one rock? 
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akronnick
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...is a FRAKKING CYLON!!!!


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« Reply #13 on: October 25, 2009, 08:02:08 PM »

Only one rock? 

It's a BIG rock.

Like the one that killed the dinosaurs.
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« Reply #14 on: October 25, 2009, 08:03:20 PM »

From a Centauri mass driver. The eagles couldn't deflect it in time.
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« Reply #15 on: October 26, 2009, 12:07:40 AM »

Ends after a three month hiatus, with a large build up and the day of its return, ever comic becomes yelling bird telling you to go away.
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syrupykeyboard
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ZOMG WEIRD DREAM


« Reply #16 on: October 26, 2009, 12:10:14 AM »

Ends after a three month hiatus, with a large build up and the day of its return, ever comic becomes yelling bird telling you to go away.
Oh dude, that is bleak.
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« Reply #17 on: October 26, 2009, 01:26:55 AM »

The Marten/Faye arc is resolved when Faye permits Marten to pick her nose. Faye goes on to bear Pintsize's baby. Dora becomes Veronica Vance's apprentice. Henry and Maurice want children so they adopt Raven.
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« Reply #18 on: October 27, 2009, 01:08:57 AM »

Lazarus Long arrives in the Dora and transports everyone to Tertius.
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« Reply #19 on: October 27, 2009, 02:16:42 AM »

I personally love the Ryan North ending

I consider it canon
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« Reply #20 on: October 27, 2009, 02:59:47 AM »

I figure the ending involves an army of belligerent walruses and a few rogue clowns, along with a small team of theoretical cellists.
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« Reply #21 on: October 27, 2009, 06:53:17 AM »

Marten wakes up to find out it was all a dream and he is realy just another mook drone working for the burger shops making crap money. He sighs and serves Faye and Hanners a Burger, not knowing its them.
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giant_bug
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« Reply #22 on: October 27, 2009, 09:53:19 AM »

None of you resolved the Mystery of Faye's Father's Death.

Shame on you.

Mr. Whittaker's suicide was induced by exposure to a Quantum Detangler during an accidental Quantum Crossover with Dresden Codak.  Beans Mulroney from Nobody Scores! and Dora team up to follow a trail of mysterious clues to a spaceship bound for the L-5 habitat where they discover that Hannelore's "father" is behind it all.  They are killed by an army of sexy Hanner Clone Bots (by Snu-Snu), but not before getting a message out to Pint Size's Military Grade Wi Fi network.

Crushed by the truth, Hanners asks Steve to lower her into the boiling metal, as she cannot Self-Terminate.  Wracked with sorrow, Beatrice Chatham liquidates her holdings and starts a chain of Suicide Booths and a sideline of Robot Oil franchises, asking all her minions to call her Mom.

And Marten and Faye are together again As They Were Always Meant To Be.

This has all been foreshadowed repeatedly by Jeph.
Note the extra HannerClone in the background in panel 2 of http://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1468
And the significance of Hanner's dream in http://questionablecontent.net./view.php?comic=1168
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syrupykeyboard
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ZOMG WEIRD DREAM


« Reply #23 on: October 27, 2009, 10:03:17 AM »

Note the extra HannerClone in the background in panel 2 of http://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1468
Well, Thor's nipples!
I'll be damned. There IS another Hannelore .
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« Reply #24 on: October 27, 2009, 11:33:39 AM »

I personally love the Ryan North ending

I consider it canon
For those that need a link: http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=674
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« Reply #25 on: October 27, 2009, 05:36:17 PM »

LAST EVER QUESTIONABLE CONTENT

TITLE: The Last One

PANEL 1
Interior. Living room of a low-rent apartment. Jimbo is watching over Jeph, who is sitting on the floor staring intensely at a small object in his hands. Marten enters, wearing construction worker's clothing.

Marten: "How you doing, Pop?"
Jimbo: "Good.  And your day up on the building?"
Marten: "Finally topped off the 22nd storey.  I'm beat... Jeph give you any trouble?"


PANEL 2
Jimbo: "Been sitting that way since you left this morning.  Just like every day.  In a world of his own."
Marten: "Remember son, be careful with that..." (To Jimbo): "I don't understand this autism.  I talk to my boy, but...I'm not  even sure if he ever hears me...Jeph's locked inside his own world.  Staring at that toy all day long. What does he think about?"
[Beat]
"Come on, son, let's wash our hands."


PANEL 3
Marten takes the snowglobe from Jeph and places it on top of the TV set as all three exit.


PANEL 4
Tight close-up on the snowglobe. The tiny white flakes are swirling around a small model building. It is a cafe, and the sign across the front reads 'Coffee of Doom'.




A prolonged analysis of this strip by QC forumites leads to the conclusion that, because of crossovers, guest comics and links in the sidebar, EVERY WEBCOMIC EVER is actually just a figment of the "Jeph Jacques Universe".
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« Reply #26 on: October 27, 2009, 06:22:37 PM »

That was epic. End.
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Carl-E
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« Reply #27 on: October 27, 2009, 06:33:32 PM »

I thought that sounded a little familiar - thanks for the link, more time to be a-wastin'!
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ThePrettyMonster
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:P


« Reply #28 on: October 28, 2009, 12:08:08 AM »

Im just hoping that there's not gunna be an ending any time soon.
Stop encouraging him!
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« Reply #29 on: October 28, 2009, 01:08:55 AM »

Jimbo:  "Welcome to the real world."
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James The Kugai

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jonarus_drakus
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Marigold and Pintsize's lovechild


« Reply #30 on: October 28, 2009, 02:50:54 AM »

Good idea, but replace the snow-globe with Pintsize's battered and lifeless head. You zoom in to see CoD inside one of his eyes.
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« Reply #31 on: October 28, 2009, 11:44:04 AM »

That completely eclipses my idea about the health inspector closing down Coffee of Doom and all the characters dying of caffeine withdrawal.

Or, all the characters start seeing a therapist who fixes them all and there's no more story because they're all well adjusted.
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« Reply #32 on: October 28, 2009, 12:01:42 PM »

LAST EVER QUESTIONABLE CONTENT

[...awesome script sadly redacted for space reasons...]

A prolonged analysis of this strip by QC forumites leads to the conclusion that, because of crossovers, guest comics and links in the sidebar, EVERY WEBCOMIC EVER is actually just a figment of the "Jeph Jacques Universe".
We should start on our own map/key to Jeph Jacques' Mind. Let's start with Dresden Codak, shall we?
The most obvious connection is the robots and assorted other "future tech" running around both of them, but there is a more direct connection: Hanners knows Kimiko Ross well enough for them to tweet each other on a semi-regular basis.
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« Reply #33 on: October 28, 2009, 01:58:08 PM »

Also there was the strip from the drunken sledding arc with many crossovers via background characters.
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« Reply #34 on: October 28, 2009, 05:34:35 PM »

I think it will end like this
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« Reply #35 on: October 28, 2009, 09:55:42 PM »

I think it will end like this

*Runs off screaming*
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James The Kugai

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« Reply #36 on: October 29, 2009, 09:58:23 AM »

None of you resolved the Mystery of Faye's Father's Death.

Shame on you.

Mr. Whittaker's suicide was induced by Faye being an insufferable cunt.

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« Reply #37 on: October 29, 2009, 10:29:39 AM »

Jeph shows up in the script as a doctor, gives everyone a sex change, Marigold does the same with Momo, Pintsize, and Winslow. Dora becomes Dorion and shortens the name 'Coffee of Doom' to 'JavaDeath.' Marten becomes Martha and goes into a psychotic rage, killing everyone in the style of the murders from The Frighteners, everyone shows up as zombies in Scary-Go-Round and EVERYONE EATS EVERYONE ELSE'S BRAIN!
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« Reply #38 on: October 29, 2009, 04:34:30 PM »

My avatar approves. 
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« Reply #39 on: October 30, 2009, 03:00:59 AM »

"Computer, end program."
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James The Kugai

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« Reply #40 on: October 30, 2009, 11:34:40 AM »

i die
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« Reply #41 on: October 30, 2009, 11:54:33 AM »

i die

Second most realistic one yet!
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Ever wonder if some miniscule decision you once made inevitably caused someone's death without your knowledge?

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ZOMG WEIRD DREAM


« Reply #42 on: October 30, 2009, 02:16:44 PM »

i die
You're not allowed to do that.
Ever.
<creepy>
Follow Indy across the bridge and everything to the cup-room, when he finds the right one, kill him and take it.
Proceed to get out of there fast.
I know, killing Indy would be a horrible thing to do (second only to raping him), but some things in life are just...
Necessary.
He wouldn't let you take it.
Besides, if he's dead, they can't easily use him in another movie.
</creepy>
And your wellbeing is infinitely more important.
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syrupykeyboard
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ZOMG WEIRD DREAM


« Reply #43 on: October 30, 2009, 02:32:39 PM »

How does it end?
Well.
Anyone ever heard of Tulpas?
They're thought-forms.
Jeph's been doing this comic for how long? Six years, right?
That's a lot of time and effort and thought put into this.

Sometimes Tulpas can get out of hand.
Sometimes their creator can no longer control them.

I put forward the hypothesis that Questionable Content will end under extremely odd circumstances.
The police won't know what to put down on the report.

So what will this mean?
Death for Jeph?
Will he be spirited away into the alternate dimension he has created?
Will the alternate dimension he has created somehow... mesh with ours, become reality?

I cannot guess as to what would happen.
It might be good, it might be ok, it might be bad.
It might not conform to Euclidean geometry.
But whatever it is, it will result in Jeph discontinuing the comic.
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« Reply #44 on: October 30, 2009, 02:57:16 PM »

Twenty to thirty years down the line a very healthy Jeph will have put the finishing touches on the virtual world which houses the characters, advanced AIs will run the characters and come up with gags.  Jeph, now a cyborg, will remain in editorial control, tweaking the program when necessary or adding new characters. 

Eventually the characters will die of old age have led long fulfilling lives.  Jeph, now an immortal robot overlord, begins work on a new creative project.
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jonarus_drakus
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Marigold and Pintsize's lovechild


« Reply #45 on: October 30, 2009, 08:59:39 PM »

I think Hannerlore herself disproved that opton when she said: "I used to want to get uploaded into an imortal machine inteligence, but then imortal machine inteligences got all popular"
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the music freaks here make me feel like a loser


« Reply #46 on: October 30, 2009, 11:11:22 PM »

They all get swine flu

and the few that survive either die during the nuclear holocaust or of radiation poisoning or starvation
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ZOMG WEIRD DREAM


« Reply #47 on: October 30, 2009, 11:17:49 PM »

They all get swine flu

and the few that survive either die during the nuclear holocaust or of radiation poisoning or starvation
Why not all of those combined?
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ZOMG WEIRD DREAM


« Reply #48 on: October 30, 2009, 11:31:56 PM »

Ends after a three month hiatus, with a large build up and the day of its return, ever comic becomes yelling bird telling you to go away.
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« Reply #49 on: October 31, 2009, 04:42:04 AM »

given the rate that time passes it QC, and the fact that Raven just started her undergraduate work in physics, we can expect to see this happen around 2047.
never hear of a timeskip?
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