Many years ago, my grandmother died. At the time, I was away near Wales working as a youth leader.
I didn't know how to handle it. I sat down in my room and pushed play on the CD player, and Joy Division's Closer album played.
I used that album for my grief. A year or two later I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome. A million behaviours were explained, and suddenly I didn't want to be that way any more. I stopped being so introverted, became confident. I stopped listening to Joy Division. Any time I played all my MP3s on random and a Joy Division song came up, I would skip it, because I just wasn't sad enough to need music like that in my life as a comfort.
I was happy, for years. And even during my depression this past year, I was happy to an extent.
Then she left.
I was listening to my MP3s on random. Joy Division came on, the song 'Decades.'
I listened to it, and it felt right.