Okay, so the first "rule" of being an excessive hipster is that nothing is good if anybody else likes it, right? Well, I believe I have discovered the second rule.
See, I frequently discuss new albums with my friends. Oftentimes, I like follow-up albums. They stand well on their own, sort of thing. The problem is, I often come across people who state that they were better before they sold out, or the new album is good, but not anywhere as good as their first one. Here, therefore, is the Second Universal Rule Of Hipsterism:
"Their Old Stuff Is Always Much Better"
1) If you are discussing a band's sophomore effort, then their new stuff is good, but their old stuff was absolutely visionary, dammit. They will NEVER measure up to the genius of their debut.
2) Whenever a band releases a new album past the sophomore effort, then whatever album is the second newest is light-years ahead of what they are doing now.
Number of albums (A) divided by two equals the comprable quality of their new material (M).