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Engagement rings
Bibliophile:
My fiance proposed with his great-grandmother's ring which still has their initials and the year (1924) engraved inside. In some small, tiny way I wish I could have picked out a ring that is to my own taste, but it's very sentimental and I adore it. Besides, if I had picked out my own ring it would be tin with a peice of coal stuck in the front, because that is about all we could afford. Doubly besides, Jesse could have proposed with an onion ring and I would have said yes. (Probably would have insisted on the bit of tin with coal stuck in it further on, though, for practical reasons. Mouldy onion ring = eww.) We still need to get wedding bands.
Traditonally the engagement ring appears to be so the lady had some idea of what the man was offering her in terms of how wealthy and generous he was (you know, in the days where couples got married before they had even held hands or kissed if they were proper). Nowadays it is to make the lady feel special. The wedding bands themselves have always been the important symbolic part of marriage.
Ernest:
--- Quote from: ruyi on 21 Dec 2007, 02:11 ---oh that reminds me, i have tentatively decided that i want to avoid jewelery with inflated value like diamonds, so i don't want a diamond ring.
i have been meaning to ask, is there something foolish about this? does someone have a cynical counter to this stance? because i would like to know if there is something hypocritical or ineffective about it. i have been paranoid about the mindless teen liberal stereotype lately.
--- End quote ---
I dunno, maybe that it should be a sacrifice to buy the ring to show her that you value her much more than other people and things.
I guess you could just counter that by saying that you can find other ways to make your significant other feel special, but it's a tradition to do it this way. And getting engaged is a big step.
Sometimes I think I'm figuring shit out. Like now. I'm thinking that engagement rings are a not only a way to tell other guys "taken" but to show how formidable the guy is by how fancy the ring is. It's like the guy marking his territory I guess. Huh, engagement rings are pretty sexist.
Storm Rider:
Ruyi is a lady, dude.
I'm not sure how I feel about the thing. On the one hand, diamond rings could certainly be perceived as giving into the culture of materialism. On the other, making the lady feel special is important. The various responses on the subject from the ladies and dudes alike sort of highlight this dichotomy. Considering I can't even get into a relationship at the moment, I guess I haven't really thought about it seriously before.
Lines:
--- Quote from: mberan42 on 21 Dec 2007, 21:15 ---See, I view it not as the woman belonging to the man so much as the woman flaunting herself, her diamond, and thusly her man to her friends (and whoever sees the ring). It's a good thing to have a flashy, sparkle-y diamond.
--- End quote ---
See, I don't like flaunting and I don't like flashy. Diamonds are nice, but I'd prefer them smaller and set around the band like this or this. Now these are very pretty, but I wouldn't want to wear them.
Eli:
Engagement rigs are nice, I guess. I'm not really sure of the purpose of them except to have something to present to your significant other when down on one knee.
As long as I've been in the relationship I'm in, we've just always talked about getting married in about 7-10 years when we're both through with college, have gotten a stable job and are basically well-established in the home and in financial areas. I see no real reason for him to propose or give me a ring. It's money better spent towards a living area or such. Haha. Believe it or not, we really are romantics.
Maybe talk to her and see what she wants? Or ask her friends or family if she has an opinion if you want it to be secret.
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