Fun Stuff > CHATTER
Please, Just Let Me Die Already
Masterbainter:
edit: nevermind, i'm not sure, however i'm quite positive what I just typed previously made no sense....
p.s. i'm extremely tired from having no sleep :-o
axerton:
--- Quote from: jmrz on 07 Sep 2009, 19:43 ---New boy story
--- End quote ---
Hahahahah
hahahahah
axerton:
ok the reason I laugh is that I am in a pertty much identical situation. except that we're both kind of in the 'I'm not sure if we want to make it more serious'
that and I kind of repeatedly talk about other girls
Edit: I thought I better post something before someone came along and thought I was just being an arse by laughing.
so to continue, theres really not a lot of advice that can be given to you for this situation. is he at least consistent with his messages. one of the hardest things we have both found is our accidental tendancies to give mixed messages. If he does too then mention it, it tends to lead to fairly un awkward converstions about it.
I figure I should be able to talk more about this, but am feeling particularly ineloquent right now.
Lines:
--- Quote from: iamiam on 07 Sep 2009, 23:17 ---what has happened is this: first, he casually asks me "out" for hang outs repeatedly, and is the one to suggest establishing concrete plans. i accept and agree with this idea. he then suddenly goes from initiator to totally unresponsive.
--- End quote ---
This. This is really annoying.
jmrz:
--- Quote from: Ptommydski on 08 Sep 2009, 04:58 ---
I speculate that you don't have a problem. If a dude lets you meet his family, he's probably pretty interested.
I suspect that if you keep playing it casual it's going to naturally become not casual soon enough.
--- End quote ---
To be fair, his housemates are his brother and his brother's girlfriend. His mum lives in a flat that is kind of attached to their house but separate. Although I suppose he never had to INVITE me to dinner.
--- Quote from: axerton on 08 Sep 2009, 05:54 ---ok the reason I laugh is that I am in a pertty much identical situation. except that we're both kind of in the 'I'm not sure if we want to make it more serious' that and I kind of repeatedly talk about other girls. so to continue, theres really not a lot of advice that can be given to you for this situation. is he at least consistent with his messages. one of the hardest things we have both found is our accidental tendancies to give mixed messages. If he does too then mention it, it tends to lead to fairly un awkward converstions about it.
--- End quote ---
See, I guess I can kind of see myself dating this guy long term. We get along really well, we used to work together, so I know what he's like around other people etc. We can actually TALK to each other and I can say absurdly geeky things and instead of him thinking I'm weird or crazy, he actually appreciates it and continues the joke with me. I also trusted him instantly around me. Normally, with most people I have a huge personal space bubble thing going on. Even with the last few guys I've dated, they couldn't even get near me sometimes without me freaking out (i.e. if they tried to kiss my neck or if they snuck up behind me and hugged me) - this doesn't happen with this guy and it surprised me, because this NEVER HAPPENS. I am huge on my personal space and if someone invades it they damn well know it, but that didn't happen at all here.
The whole thing is kind of great, except for the fact that it's not... solid. It doesn't seem like a definite to me. He could meet some amazingly wonderful girl tomorrow and ignore me entirely and because things aren't official, then he could do so freely.
One of my friends asked me the other day (actually, one of the guys who has shown interest in dating me, who asked me how my love life was going), whether I would be upset if he started dating someone else. I sat there for five minutes debating whether the 'yes' I'd instantly typed out and not sent was the right answer or not. Yes, I would upset. I would be pretty damn devastated if he did. I just don't know whether I can tell him that without fucking things up. Because things ARE great. But this is not how things usually go with me, I hate not knowing.
So I mean, I don't know. I can't remember how long it's been since we had the last talk, my guess would be about a month and a half? I just do not want to fuck it over by being all "yes you're amazing and I'm pretty damn sure I love you and why the ever loving fuck aren't we dating official like yet?!", because that might just freak him out a little?
(And yeah, this is all kind of a bit ranty but it kind of helps to blurt it all out because it's clearly not something I feel comfortable telling HIM right now.
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