Fun Stuff > CLIKC
QC Forums Dwarf Fortress Succession game.
KharBevNor:
I'm working on the next update, probably covering a longer period in-game because theres's nothing really going on but building, except a wave of migrants. I've got a point in my head I want to reach to parcel off the next update.
KharBevNor:
Chapter 2: No Goblin of Goblin Born Shall Harm Me!
Journal of 'KharBevNor' LashedGills, expedition leader.
16th Felsite
Jeans is becoming very...eager about his new job.
At the protest of my old friend Scandinavian War Machine, who dotes terribly on his pet cat Asob, I take him off of butchery duty for a while.
Many new projects are underway. The sounds of digging, hammering and sawing reverberate throughout the fortress. Stockpiles expand, new workshops are created. I order David Dovey to begin the construction of a large quantity of pointy sticks.
22nd Felsite
"Danosaur"
"Yessir?"
"How are you finding your new job as the fortress cook?"
"Well, I must say that the ingredients I've been given to work with are slightly...unconventional."
"Well, you can put aside your misgivings. Because you're now a wood burner! Go upstairs and make me some fucking charcoal!"
"Aye sir!"
Charcoal is dangerously undwarvish, but until we strike coal it will have to do...
27th Felsite
All dwarfs but me now have their own bedrooms.
Not all furniture is in place, and smoothing has barely started, but eventually they will be fine little rooms, each containing a bed and a stone cabinet, with perhaps a statue eventually. I personally still sleep in the barracks...for now.
It continues raining above. Be merciful Armok! I order the installation of doors to block the outside world, and the construction of a small schist edifice to protect the top of the stairs to the Cursed Sky.
14th hematite
Rain stops. Work progresses. All that can be seen of Gorgeconfined on the surface is the schisthouse, which is shituated nexsht to the shitpile.
26th hematite
Armok be praised! Vush be sated with goblin burgers! 5 hardy souls have trecked across the mountains, away from the sinful and soon to be annihilated decadence of the Worshipful Corridors, to our haven at Gorgeconfined. They came over the eastern pass, with a few pack animals and little more than the clothes on their backs.
I met with the most senior among them, Likob Ilunathel, who Vush (MHFEBWTFOGH) was already whispering possessed the true name 'Buttfranklin'.
"This is fabulous!" I cried "More pious souls have come out to us to await the armokalypse!"
He looked confused.
"They said in the mountainhomes you had struck adamantium..."
"The tongues of sinners spew only lies my brother, now come..."
"Look, let me be quite frank. I'm only really a casual worshipper of Lashed the Queen of Pregnancies, and all this pentarmokstal shit is kind of freaking me out, so I think I'll just get my pack animals and..."
Nice one Jeans! You shall have a double helping of cat tallow at dinner tonight!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
After consuming seven barrels of Longland Beer (it is considerably less holy than Swamp Whiskey) and deciding the true names of the new migrants, I take the opportunity to interview each one.
Thomas Edison is the only dwarfess amongst them. Although Alex C says she looks quite sickly, she will need to shoulder some of the dreadful loinburden from Boro_Bandito.
"So what do you do?"
"I'm a woodworker."
"We already have two carpenters. I think you'll find your a mechanic. Next.
Christophe walks in. I am instantly jealous of his incredible sideburns.
"And what do you do, my good dwarf?"
"I'm a milker sir. Fifty years before the teat."
"That's going to present a problem."
"How so?"
"Well...can you milk cats?"
"...not easily"
"Better learn to cook then. NEXT!"
Dicky Dodoksat enters. It is a shame he doesn't have a stammer, I could use some cheer to take my mind off the impending Armokalypse.
"What is your profession then?"
"I'm a planter"
"Farming is for elves, humans and other heathen scum! Do you know what's Dwarvish?"
"Beards?"
"ROCKS! YOU'RE A MASON NOW BOY. NEXT!"
The Pied Piper is a tall (almost four feet), muscular Vushite. I feel almost sexually attracted to him. I must take a penance of Rum tonight!
"So what do you do?"
"I'm a potash maker."
I write 'mason' on the work ledger.
"NEXT!"
The last of them is the diagnostician Buttfranklin.
"Look, KharBevNor, I warn you that when I have the chance, I'm out of here, and I'm taking whoever wants to go with me."
"How about I make you book-keeper?"
"..."
"You'll get a study. and a cobaltite throne."
"bastard!"
Now, back to work!
28th Malachite
IT IS FINISHED! The first of my great works is complete! I summon Danosaur to prepare new diagrams:
What you see here is two pairs of pressure plates and hatch covers, linked together with the one next to them. It is a device invented by the finest Dwarven minds to exploit the weknesses of lesser ones. An attacker will walk down the corridor, trying to find the quickest way into the fortress. They will pass over the first hatch and plate, but when they reach the second plate, it will activate the hatch in front of them, which sits over a massive drop. Unable to continue, the confused attacker will instead try to back out...only to activate the other hatch on his way out, blocking his exit! Thus he will scurry back and forth for all eternity. It goes without saying that the pressure plates have been cunningly engineered not to be set off by dwarves.
Should he have a friend who falls down the hatch, each one has a pit extending three levels to this room:
Indeed, actually, to a pit one level beneath this. The fall should injure or stun them. Later on the pit can be filled with magma or spikes, or both!
But you ask, what is the point of just trapping an enemy for eternity between two hatches, in the only entress to the Fortress? Well, you see those brown bars in the first picture? And that lever in the second picture? Each of those brown bars is a spring-loaded bundle of wooden spikes. Every time that lever there is pulled, they will shoot out the ground and retract again. Given that they're only wood, I will probably order the lever pulled about 20-30 times to make sure the job gets done.
I must go. We're just getting ready to begin our first smelting operations!
Johnny C:
oh my god i want to be a dwarf
KharBevNor:
You can, I've got two migrants.
I am going to probably play through to the end of my turn tonight, and write the last update either tonight or tomorrow afternoon. A lot of stuff happened. Part of the fortress is...kind of wet. Boro, I'm stocking up on the components of brass screwpumps. Your turn is going to be really fun
Buttfranklin:
Haha, I love the trap! And thanks for letting me be a dwarf! :{D
looking forward to reading more
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