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QC Captions Vol. 32!

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Carl-E:
Marten: "... ok, see what I mean?  There she is again, pretending to read some book." 

Steve: "Yeah, whatever.  I mean c'mon, dude, why would anyone  want to stalk you?"

WAYF:
Since we've already broken the fourth wall so hard that there's now practically a hole in my computer:

(click to show/hide)Marten: Do you ever feel like your life is a series of distinct moments?
Steve: Nope...
Marten: I mean, sometimes I find myself in a new place and wonder how exactly I got there.
Steve: I imagine you walked...
Marten: But that's just the thing! I remember posing as if walking, but I don't actually remember putting one foot in front of the other, you know? And sometimes I feel as if a single day takes entire weeks for me to finish.
Steve: My movements feel sort of ... stuttered sometimes, but that's about it.
Marten: Do you at least have those strange dreams sometimes where the bird yells at you and sometimes a dog and a bandicoot show up?
Steve: Now that does sound familiar...
Redhead: Must not make eye contact ... must not make eye contact...
(click to show/hide)Marten: If you could be any animal in an alternate reality, what would you be?
Steve: I'd want to be a bird that does nothing but swear all day. Man, that'd be awesome. You?
Marten: I'd like to be an enormous, shaggy white dog, and I'd be instantly endearing.
Steve: You live that dream, Marten...

*meanwhile*

Hannelore (practising in a mirror): I'm Randy! I'm a bandicoot! I have a pouch full of babies!

FunkyTuba:
Marten: I don't know why people call her "sweet-tits"... They don't look all that great to me.

Steve: You wouldn't be saying that if you had tasted them. Trust Me.

Tova:
Marten: Look, there she is. We could just walk right up and ask her: "Hey, is your name really-"
Steve: Dude. It's not her name. Shut up and keep walking.

Is it cold in here?:
"Whenever I'm around a woman, I feel like I recede into the background"
"Well, you do"

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