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Call back right away and apologize.

Run to her apartment and apologize.

Wait until tomorrow, and get arrested at the airport trying to apologize at the gate.

Call/go over and ask for an explanation.

Decide it's a lost cause, toast a waffle or two, and try to move on.

[themacnut]

Congrats Jeph, you wrote Marten brilliantly. I'd be tired of being fucked around too if I were him.

I'm with Napoleon on this. Marten got well and truly yanked around by Padma over the past week or so (and not in the fun way), 'bout time he did some yanking of his own. Why did you do that Marten? Because you're most likely PISSED at the way Padma's been treating you lately, that's why. Bravo for showing some spine.

[Vurogj]

5 new replies? I haven't even started typing yet!

Anyway, NOW is the time for Elliot to swoop in and capture Padma's heart.

Also, it scares me when I'm reminded Jeph reads the forums.

[Tova]

I'd just like to add that it would have been perfectly possible for him to "move on" without shutting her down like that. He could at least say goodbye properly.

And add another vote in support of Jeph's most recent post.

Congrats Jeph, you wrote Marten brilliantly. I'd be tired of being fucked around too if I were him.

I'm with Napoleon on this. Marten got well and truly yanked around by Padma over the past week or so (and not in the fun way), 'bout time he did some yanking of his own. Why did you do that Marten? Because you're most likely PISSED as the way Padma's been treating you lately, that's why. Bravo for showing some spine.

That doesn't surprise me.

There's a middle ground between being a doormat and being a prick that you ought to consider. Assertiveness is neither of those things. He didn't show any spine, just his arse.

[litthefilter]

Congrats Jeph, you wrote Marten brilliantly. I'd be tired of being fucked around too if I were him.

I'm with Napoleon on this. Marten got well and truly yanked around by Padma over the past week or so (and not in the fun way), 'bout time he did some yanking of his own. Why did you do that Marten? Because you're most likely PISSED at the way Padma's been treating you lately, that's why. Bravo for showing some spine.

He didn't show any spine, though.  If he'd explained to Padma why he was upset with her, and that because he was upset with her, he didn't want to hang out, that's one thing, but being passive-aggressive and dismissive is not particularly admirable.

[akronnick]

He didn't show any spine, just his arse.

QFT.

[iduguphergrave]

Anyway, NOW is the time for Elliot to swoop in and capture Padma's heart.

Actually once Elliott hears about this, he's more likely to swoop in and capture Marten's pancreas. With a spoon.

[themacnut]

He didn't show any spine, though.  If he'd explained to Padma why he was upset with her, and that because he was upset with her, he didn't want to hang out....

Eh, what would be the point of explaining all that? She's leaving anyway, and he's obviously not going to follow her to CA, so he'll most likely never see her again. Why bother putting any extra effort into what would just be delaying the inevitable?

[haikupoet]

He didn't show any spine, though.  If he'd explained to Padma why he was upset with her, and that because he was upset with her, he didn't want to hang out....

Eh, what would be the point of explaining all that? She's leaving anyway, and he's obviously not going to follow her to CA, so he'll most likely never see her again. Why bother putting any extra effort into what would just be delaying the inevitable?

Short form: Marten isn't an omniscient narrator. There's probably more story to play out here.

[Torlek]

I can understand Marten's reaction completely. "You don't return my calls for a week, don't have a rational explanation for why and now the night before you leave you want a farewell fuck? To hell with that."
This is not a well thought out action, it is not a wise action and it is probably not the "right" action. But it feels good. He's feeling used. By doing this he feels like he's standing up for himself. Really should have explained why he's pissed though. But, again, not well thought out.

This reminds me of when I got dumped in September. Her dad's dying of a long term degenerative illness and she just walled herself off emotionally, never telling me how she was feeling, always blowing off my offers to be there for her and help her through it. It's easy to get fed up with it. Especially if she wants to be "just friends" again as if she's never ignored you or walled you off. True, you're probably lying to yourself that she'll feel remorse after you blow her off. But sometimes it just feels good to be vengeful even though it is petty and, to an extent, immature.

Truth be told though, Padma was probably never a good match for Marten anyway. True, they like each others' company but do they have any similar interests? You can't build a relationship off sex, I don't care how good it is.

[bicostp]

To me it sounds more like she called Marten at the 11'th hour just to not leave him in the lurch.

Remember, the last time we saw them together he was still putting on a facade of confidence, and she was the apprehensive one. He hasn't really shown her any negativity until now. For all we know, she still thinks he was truly happy. On Marten's side, the week of radio silence gave him the push he needed to face the reality of their situation. It's only been a couple weeks, but even the way he talks to his friends about her has changed.

They both might want their relationship to progress further, but there's no realistic way for that to happen. Padma would have to set her family aside or Marten would have to uproot his entire life again, and neither is willing to ask the other to make that kind of sacrifice. Deep down they both know it won't work, and now they each know the other feels that way.

They both broke it off less-than-ideal ways, but that's how life is sometimes.

That said, the storyline hasn't ended yet. Is this it, or will there be an amicable resolution? We'll have to wait and see.

[Method of Madness]

I just realized, she said "one last time".  I guess she really is leaving for good, rather than to just visit until the grandmother gets better (or doesn't).

[Is it cold in here?]

Please don't draw up a crapsaccharine "Officer and a Gentleman" ending to this plot arc. Don't do that. Life isn't like that. An honest resolution to the story would have Marten running to Padma and being shot down because she has to leave and a lame apology that she got too involved too fast, etc etc that ends with her taking Marten's heart and shitting on it. Let Marten shit on the girl's heart for once. He's earned it!

Please be careful not to sound like you're telling Jeph how to write the comic, as opposed to expressing your preferences.

[Carl-E]

His memories will be the bitterness he felt this last week.  Hers will be the fear of getting too close that she almost  overcame.  


He should go see her for both their sake (sakes?).

[Napoleon_Blownapart]

Please be careful not to sound like you're telling Jeph how to write the comic, as opposed to expressing your preferences.

My apologies. I wasn't telling, I was begging. I know he's gonna do his own thing but I can still plead, can't I?

[Napoleon_Blownapart]

His memories will be the bitterness he felt this last week.  Hers will be the fear of getting too close that she almost  overcame.  


He should go see her for both their sake (sakes?).

Wait, you know that Padma has a fear of getting to close? I didn't see that in her character. Big difference between that and getting close and realising it was dumb due to having to leave. I got the impression that Padma is merely fond of rushing in where angels fear to tread.

As for Marten, his memories shouldn't be about bitterness. They should be about triumph in gaining enough self-respect not to go into full doormat mode over a girl who lead him on. He already moved across a whole county for a girl before and that blew up in his face. And Padma was really just a fling. It wasn't a year long or even month long relationship. She didn't have the brains to back away from the intimacy, or the guts to admit she went too far until the last minute. Whatever happens, whatever she could possibly explain to him, and whatever feelings Marten would get off his chest if they did meet one last time, he's still gonna get burned and she is responsible for it. Fuck that noise. Marten should walk away feeling proud.

[Dust]

He's probably made the best call he could, but hopefully he sees her tomorrow before she goes. A shut bridge is much better than a burnt one.

[NotAwesomeAnymore]

"You don't return my calls for a week, don't have a rational explanation for why and now the night before you leave you want a farewell fuck? To hell with that."

If I were Marten, I would have said those words, out loud, to Padma. How else is he going to know whether she got the message? What he did is no path to resolution.

[snubnose]

Painful, painful, very painful. 

[truestatic]

I can't blame Marten.  I'd be feeling pretty used in his place.  She's made it very difficult for him to be the bigger man.  

Ice cold, Marten.

If I were Marten, I would have said those words, out loud, to Padma. How else is he going to know whether she got the message? What he did is no path to resolution.

Padma is not that dense.  She should know what's up.

[Mustakyy]

Oh dear.     I had a hunch that this might end badly, but daaaaaaaaaang!

I have had this planned since Padma first showed up in the comic.

HA HA HA HA HA.

Well played, Mr Jacques, well played. (Why the hell am I having a mental image of Mr. Jacques wearing a monocle and petting his giant dog, while laughing evilly)

His memories will be the bitterness he felt this last week.  Hers will be the fear of getting too close that she almost  overcame. 

He should go see her for both their sake (sakes?).

Kinda hoping the same, but at the same time im fearing the worst..

[pwhodges]

Let Marten shit on the girl's heart for once. He's earned it!

Deliberately answering bad behaviour with bad behaviour is not a good thing for anyone to do; there is always a better way.

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

Jeph: you are a very very bad man D:

Hodges: thank you for all your posts, all of them

Readers who are going "yeah bro you show that bitch, you got some spine finally, hurf hurf huuuuurrrrf": you are acting predictably wretched and awful, and I would be disappointed, but honestly I'm not surprised at all

Marten: enjoy your heartbreak, bro! I hope your personal moral victory is worth the months of bitter recrimination!

[Soulsynger]

There was a simple solution here:

Marten: "Hey, Padma. It's been a while." (passive aggressive tone)
Padma: "Yeah, sorry, I've been busy. Packing and stuff."
Marten: "Right." (again, passive aggressive tone)
Padma: "Anyway, are you busy tonight? I'm ... I'm leaving tomorrow, and I'd like to see you one last time."
Marten: "Oh, wait a second, you sound unwell... is something wrong?"

... you know, invest the tiniest bit of human compassion into at least one single thing you say.

I don't mean being treated like this doesn't deserve some kind of cold shoulder. But you don't have to be THAT much of a cold-hearted ice-king the second anything goes against your expectations.
ANY kind of relation is never about "an eye for an eye".

Deliberately answering bad behaviour with bad behaviour is not a good thing for anyone to do; there is always a better way.

IMO, this was uncalled for and he is right to wonder about himself.

Also, if Padma has ANY intention at all to clear this up, she will meet Marten in person. Both of them have passivity-issues (granted, at different times and in different situations) and its time at least one of them breaks through. Not to save whatever it is they found in each other, but to accomplish any growth at all in this situation.

Painful, painful, very painful.  

I'm just kinda angry at both of them. °O

[truestatic]

Readers who are going "yeah bro you show that bitch, you got some spine finally, hurf hurf huuuuurrrrf": you are predictably wretched excuses fir human beings and I would be disappointed but honestly I'm not surprised at all

Pardon me, but that wasn't quite what I was trying to say.  I just think that his reaction was very reasonable.  He has every right to be emotional.  What she pulled was pretty harsh.  Sometimes our feelings get the better of us.  Treat someone who cares about you like dirt for a week, and they might be a little mad about it.

[Skaltura]

So Jeph didn't disappoint at all, Marten's happiness IS truly written out of the comic.  

[AnAverageWriter]

Damnit Marten.

This is a man who, when faced with a thousand mile journey, makes sure to shoot himself in the foot first.

[Soulsynger]

[ ... ] Treat someone who cares about you like dirt for a week, and they might be a little mad about it.

A tiny week of radio silence is hardly something I'd call "getting treated like dirt". Especially when there has been many a fun sexy-times before it.

Marten sees what he wants to see. In this case, this is hard for him because he IS emotionally attached. And that makes a "tiny week" seem so painful. But honestly, its more normal than not. (at least in my world)

edit:
Life is stranger than fiction.

[RyanPm40]

Marten is gonna stop her from leaving, they're gonna bang, get married, and live happily ever fucking after. Boom. [removed by moderator, shipping rule]

[akronnick]

[ ... ] Treat someone who cares about you like dirt for a week, and they might be a little mad about it.

A tiny week of radio silence is hardly something I'd call "getting treated like dirt". Especially when there has been many a fun sexy-times before it.

Marten sees what he wants to see. In this case, this is hard for him because he IS emotionally attached. And that makes a "tiny week" seem so painful. But honestly, its more normal than not. (at least in my world)

edit:
Life is stranger than fiction.

Time is a relative thing.

If Padma wasn't going to be leaving, a week with no contact isn't that big of a deal, but when your down to the last week before the big departure, um, yeah.

[truestatic]

[ ... ] Treat someone who cares about you like dirt for a week, and they might be a little mad about it.

A tiny week of radio silence is hardly something I'd call "getting treated like dirt". Especially when there has been many a fun sexy-times before it.

Marten sees what he wants to see. In this case, this is hard for him because he IS emotionally attached. And that makes a "tiny week" seem so painful. But honestly, its more normal than not. (at least in my world)

To my understanding, on the scale of their relationship, a week is pretty big.  On the scale of the time they had left, a tiny week was everything.  And she discarded that.

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

Readers who are going "yeah bro you show that bitch, you got some spine finally, hurf hurf huuuuurrrrf": you are predictably wretched excuses fir human beings and I would be disappointed but honestly I'm not surprised at all

Pardon me, but that wasn't quite what I was trying to say.  I just think that his reaction was very reasonable.  He has every right to be emotional.  What she pulled was pretty harsh.  Sometimes our feelings get the better of us.  Treat someone who cares about you like dirt for a week, and they might be a little mad about it.

If you understand his actions here but still recognize they are dumb and vindictive, I'm not talking to you with that comment

If, on the other hand, you want to provide justification for his actions, especially if you want to couch it in extremely sexist language, well then what I said applies

[truestatic]

Readers who are going "yeah bro you show that bitch, you got some spine finally, hurf hurf huuuuurrrrf": you are predictably wretched excuses fir human beings and I would be disappointed but honestly I'm not surprised at all

Pardon me, but that wasn't quite what I was trying to say.  I just think that his reaction was very reasonable.  He has every right to be emotional.  What she pulled was pretty harsh.  Sometimes our feelings get the better of us.  Treat someone who cares about you like dirt for a week, and they might be a little mad about it.

If you understand his actions here but still recognize they are dumb and vindictive, I'm not talking to you with that comment

If, on the other hand, you want to provide justification for his actions, especially if you want to couch it in extremely sexist language, well then what I said applies

Fair enough.  I know they're dumb and vindictive.  HE knows they are as soon as he hangs up the phone, and he feels awful about it immediately.  But when he said them they felt absolutely right.  Emotions aren't rational. 

I think we agree with each other though.   

[pwhodges]

On the scale of the time they had left, a tiny week was everything.  And she discarded that.

In particular, she delayed going, and then didn't use the delay with Marten as, presumably, she had intended.  I can see that she could have got confused in her own mind, feeling that all she was doing by delaying was making it harder for both of them when the time came, and so decided to pour cold water on the relationship before then.

[truestatic]

On the scale of the time they had left, a tiny week was everything.  And she discarded that.

In particular, she delayed going, and then didn't use the delay with Marten as, presumably, she had intended.  I can see that she could have got confused in her own mind, feeling that all she was doing by delaying was making it harder for both of them when the time came, and so decided to pour cold water on the relationship before then.

I didn't wanna say that because it sounded sorta contrived in my head, but yup.  Talk about mixed messages.  They both fucked up and now they'll both pay the price.  Presumably.  Unless one of them bites the bullet and apologizes.  But at this point I don't know if either of them should accept an apology from the other.  It seems unlikely though.  We like stewing in our own misery waaay too much to let that happen.

Anyways I've posted too many times in rapid succession, I need to stop before this gets weird.   

[Soulsynger]

On the scale of the time they had left, a tiny week was everything.  And she discarded that.

In particular, she delayed going, and then didn't use the delay with Marten as, presumably, she had intended.  I can see that she could have got confused in her own mind, feeling that all she was doing by delaying was making it harder for both of them when the time came, and so decided to pour cold water on the relationship before then.

Thanks you three, I can see what I failed to consider. ~~

But my earlier point remains. There is no room for "bearing grudges" in this situation. And what Marten has done seems like just that for me.

[Akima]

I can understand Marten's reaction completely. "You don't return my calls for a week, don't have a rational explanation for why and now the night before you leave you want a farewell fuck? To hell with that."

What's irrational about "I've been busy. Packing and stuff."? You might not think it is adequate, or satisfactory, or whatever, but it is quite rational.

As for Marten, his memories shouldn't be about bitterness. They should be about triumph in gaining enough self-respect not to go into full doormat mode over a girl who lead him on. He already moved across a whole county for a girl before and that blew up in his face. And Padma was really just a fling. It wasn't a year long or even month long relationship. She didn't have the brains to back away from the intimacy, or the guts to admit she went too far until the last minute. Whatever happens, whatever she could possibly explain to him, and whatever feelings Marten would get off his chest if they did meet one last time, he's still gonna get burned and she is responsible for it. Fuck that noise. Marten should walk away feeling proud.

Nice to see we're back to the woman-blaming-and-man-absolving again. I mean, it's not like Padma and Marten are both adults fully responsible for their feelings and actions in a mutually voluntary relationship. Nope it's all Padma's fault and Marten should be proud of himself. Ugh...  

I'd just like to add that it would have been perfectly possible for him to "move on" without shutting her down like that. He could at least say goodbye properly.

I'm with Tova on this. There's a middle ground between being a doormat and a prick, and Marten is a long way from that. I thought he did the right thing in yesterday's strip, but definitely not today. Bad karma for you, Marten, but you already know that, right?

[Soulsynger]

I'd just like to add that it would have been perfectly possible for him to "move on" without shutting her down like that. He could at least say goodbye properly.

I'm with Tova on this. There's a middle ground between being a doormat and a prick, and Marten is a long way from that. I thought he did the right thing in yesterday's strip, but definitely not today. Bad karma for you, Marten, but you already know that, right?

I'll go ahead and frame this. May I?

[truestatic]

Nice to see we're back to the woman-blaming-and-man-absolving again. I mean, it's not like Padma and Marten are both adults fully responsible for their feelings and actions in a mutually voluntary relationship. Nope it's all Padma's fault and Marten should be proud of himself. Ugh...  

I am a filthy liar and an all around bad person, but here I go, posting again.  I agree that Padma and Marten BOTH fucked up.  The only thing I have to say in his defense that I can't say in hers is, he made an immediately regretted mistake in the heat of the moment.  She consciously chose to ignore him for a week, ten days, whatever.  And so far as I can tell, she doesn't seem to feel that bad about it.  He notes that "It's been a while," and she's dismissive when she should be sincere.

[Tova]

I'd just like to add that while I agree that both of them have made their mistakes, I do also feel for them both.

I am really wondering what is going to happen tomorrow now. I barely know how to answer the current poll.

[Napoleon_Blownapart]

Nice to see we're back to the woman-blaming-and-man-absolving again. I mean, it's not like Padma and Marten are both adults fully responsible for their feelings and actions in a mutually voluntary relationship. Nope it's all Padma's fault and Marten should be proud of himself. Ugh...  

If their roles were reversed and Marten had been the instigator of the fling and then left Padma dry for a week because he was moving out of town and wanted to purge her from his mind, then it would be his fault and she would be the one who deserved to walk away feeling proud. It's not about gender. I even explained that in an earlier post. You sound biased towards women.

[ihaveavoice]

Nice to see we're back to the woman-blaming-and-man-absolving again. I mean, it's not like Padma and Marten are both adults fully responsible for their feelings and actions in a mutually voluntary relationship. Nope it's all Padma's fault and Marten should be proud of himself. Ugh...  

I am a filthy liar and an all around bad person, but here I go, posting again.  I agree that Padma and Marten BOTH fucked up.  The only thing I have to say ins his defense that I can't say in hers is, he made an immediately regretted mistake in the heat of a moment.  She consciously chose to ignore him for a week, ten days, whatever.  And so far as I can tell, she doesn't seem to feel that bad about it.  He notes that "It's been a while," and she's dismissive when she should be sincere.

I didn't read dismissiveness in her claim to have been "packing and stuff," but rather awkward guilty dodginess. I am still working on having major issues with essentially doing what Padma does here, though I've never done it in any sort of calling-boy-about-relationship context since the summer after eighth grade: feeling overwhelmed by emotional conflict and letting time just slip away while I agonize over it. If Padma's anything like me, she constantly felt little spurts of panic and shame over the course of that week, with each passing day working to convince her that she wouldn't be well-received if she called and that she'd already blown it, but this is nothing you can explain as a reason for not having called, and it's nothing you should be able to explain away because when it's in a phone-call-about-relationship context, no matter how you felt while you did it, you inflicted pain and uncertainty on the other person, and that's just not cool. Neither is tersely blowing someone off instead of at least hinting at what's wrong, especially when it will deny both of you closure. Badly done, Marten and Padma. Badly done.

Akima does not sound biased toward women. Seriously? She sounds like she's responding to an overall trend of slut-shaming and woman-blaming that's gone on in past arguments about Marten and Padma's fling. And regardless of gender, I think both sides have behaved badly, as I said above. Lashing out isn't okay just because it feels good in the moment. In fact, we'd probably be even more pissed with Padma if their roles were reversed, because we likely wouldn't have seen the instant remorse, though sometimes we do get to see the interiority of the people on the other end of Marten's phone conversations.

[truestatic]

Nice to see we're back to the woman-blaming-and-man-absolving again. I mean, it's not like Padma and Marten are both adults fully responsible for their feelings and actions in a mutually voluntary relationship. Nope it's all Padma's fault and Marten should be proud of himself. Ugh...  

I am a filthy liar and an all around bad person, but here I go, posting again.  I agree that Padma and Marten BOTH fucked up.  The only thing I have to say ins his defense that I can't say in hers is, he made an immediately regretted mistake in the heat of a moment.  She consciously chose to ignore him for a week, ten days, whatever.  And so far as I can tell, she doesn't seem to feel that bad about it.  He notes that "It's been a while," and she's dismissive when she should be sincere.

I didn't read dismissiveness in her claim to have been "packing and stuff," but rather awkward guilty dodginess. I am still working on having major issues with essentially doing what Padma does here, though I've never done it in any sort of calling-boy-about-relationship context since the summer after eighth grade: feeling overwhelmed by emotional conflict and letting time just slip away while I agonize over it. If Padma's anything like me, she constantly felt little spurts of panic and shame over the course of that week, with each passing day working to convince her that she wouldn't be well-received if she called and that she'd already blown it, but this is nothing you can explain as a reason for not having called, and it's nothing you should be able to explain away because when it's in a phone-call-about-relationship context, no matter how you felt while you did it, you inflicted pain and uncertainty on the other person, and that's just not cool. Neither is tersely blowing someone off instead of at least hinting at what's wrong, especially when it will deny both of you closure. Badly done, Marten and Padma. Badly done.

Oh, you don't have to explain it to me.  I'm acutely familiar with that feeling.  You know you should've called, but you feel terrible about not calling, so you can't call, but then you feel even worse, and you have to call, but it's been so long there's no way you can face up to that.  And then you're put in a situation where you have to see them and you can no longer be evasive.  And suddenly the world is ending.  I understand.  I deal with the exact same thing. 

It kind of sucks, right?

That said, I still think Padma could have preempted his predictable rejection by explaining this and giving a heartfelt apology.  Which she would've had plenty of time to plan and rehearse.  I don't know.  Blah blah blah hindsight.

[Blackjoker]

Marten was passive aggressive here, probably unwise to do it, understandable as hell though. Doras earlier statement about Marten being fucked was pretty much spot on, there's no way this would end cleanly. If Marten did decide to spend a last day with her it probably wouldn't have gone well. There would be a lot of tension and either it would be a kind of frantic 'screw till we can't think' that might be fun but would probably be emotionally draining for both or Marten would get frustrated, tell her how she feels, then she unloads on him, points out how her Grandmothers illness has her stressed, etc. she storms off, he's even more depressed, and neither of them are especially happy. Really, maybe the best thing he could do is see her off, wish her luck and that would be it. The fact is though that this pretty much couldn't end in a way that was happy unless neither of them developed any emotional attachments which seems unlikely.

[Tova]

Life is always so much messier than we armchair critics like to admit to.

No-one is going to walk away from this episode feeling proud.

[truestatic]

Life is always so much messier than we armchair critics like to admit to.

No-one is going to walk away from this episode feeling proud.

Not even Elliot?  Just look at that awesome train wreck he's not a part of!  How can he not feel spectacular about that? 

[Tova]

I know you were kidding around, but I don't think Elliot would feel at all happy about anything that involves Padma being unhappy.

[truestatic]

I know you were kidding around, but I don't think Elliot would feel at all happy about anything that involves Padma being unhappy.

No, he's a pretty empathetic guy.  No one's misery will make him cheerful.  Sorry, poor choice for an attempt at levity.

[Akima]

If their roles were reversed and Marten had been the instigator of the fling

Once again you are assigning the entire responsibility for the fling starting to Padma. It takes two to tango, and Marten grabbed the opportunity to jump Padma's bones. He is not a robot, not a helpless victim, and not a child, but an adult responsible for his actions. It is certainly possible that I am biased towards women, but I am definitely biased against any attempt to ascribe entire responsibility in relationships to women, or absolve men for their entirely voluntary choices, or apply double-standards to the sexuality and behaviour of either gender.

[pwhodges]

Readers who are going "yeah bro you show that bitch, you got some spine finally, hurf hurf huuuuurrrrf": you are acting predictably wretched and awful, and I would be disappointed, but honestly I'm not surprised at all

A particular reason that I continue to be impressed by Jeph is the way that he describes realistic people, puts them in realistic situations, and has them make a realistic mess of them.  The scenarios obviously speak to a lot of his readers, and some come here to relate their own similar experiences and responses.  Some of those responses are better and some are worse than the characters in the comic have managed; but everyone who comes here has the opportunity to learn by seeing and discussing the responses of others.  So all are welcome, as long as good manners are maintained, and the boundaries outlined in the rules are not overstepped.

[Napoleon_Blownapart]

If their roles were reversed and Marten had been the instigator of the fling

Once again you are assigning the entire responsibility for the fling starting to Padma. It takes two to tango, and Marten grabbed the opportunity to jump Padma's bones. He is not a robot, not a helpless victim, and not a child, but an adult responsible for his actions. It is certainly possible that I am biased towards women, but I am definitely biased against any attempt to ascribe entire responsibility in relationships to women, or absolve men for their entirely voluntary choices, or apply double-standards to the sexuality and behaviour of either gender.

Actually I was ascribing to Padma the entire responsibility for the total cold shoulder treatment of Marten. I see nothing wrong with her actions before that. You're right, Marten's not a robot or a helpless victim or a child. He decided to trust that Padma wouldn't suddenly have second thoughts and run away. She did just that. If their roles were reversed, I'd put the blame on him just as strongly.