Comic Discussion > QUESTIONABLE CONTENT
What's So Terrible About Kids?
techkid:
--- Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 03 Jan 2013, 10:26 ---Some people have a neurological need for the structure and predictability that children are so well designed for destroying.
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This,
--- Quote from: jwhouk on 03 Jan 2013, 12:32 ---Fear.
Fear that I could possibly screw up the life of another human being - without trying.
That's why I'm sans children.
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this,
--- Quote from: Bluesummers on 03 Jan 2013, 16:28 ---I'm afraid of becoming my parents, in trying to raise my own child...hence the fear. Not hate...just uncertainty.
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and this, are pretty much my reasons for not wanting kids of my own. I have troubles maintaining my own sense of "normality", and my near-obsessiveness to structure and regularity are not a great place to have any children around (although I am going to be working on this soon enough).
Do I want children (read: do I want to be responsible for a life not my own, that needs and demands basically constant attention and care) now? No, not in my current state of mental and financial health (slightly skewed, and damn-near broke respectively). If I can get my shit together on both fronts, then I might upgrade my stance to "maybe".
pwhodges:
--- Quote from: jwhouk on 03 Jan 2013, 14:41 ---Erm, shouldn't this thread be merged with the one in DISCUSS?
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I don't see the need; this thread has its own identity, and is not an argument-based discussion. It could be in Chatter, perhaps, but it arose from the comic and can as well stay here (even though we no longer have a barrier between the forums, some people don't explore as much as others).
Barmymoo:
My two parenting tips which I hope and intend to employ when I parent my own children are: remember you are aiming to raise an adult, not a child, and be consistent. The former leads into things like "will this remain cute when they are 13? 23? 53?" and if the answer is no, deal with it now while they're still malleable, and the latter expands into things such as "if you're going to draw a line in the sand, enforce it - if you say "come here" and they do not, go and get them, and bring them to "here". Don't teach them to disobey".
It is, however, far easier to parent in theory, or part-time, than in practice. I do admit to some trepidation about full-time responsibility for a tiny person, but I hope that having spent at least a decade thinking about and practising it, it'll be easier than just plunging in there without a clue.
Carl-E:
--- Quote from: Barmymoo on 04 Jan 2013, 04:26 ---...be consistent...expands into things such as "if you're going to draw a line in the sand, enforce it - if you say "come here" and they do not, go and get them, and bring them to "here". Don't teach them to disobey".
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:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :roll:
That really works well when they are smaller and weaker than you. There comes a point when they are not... and it's about the same time as a nasty rebellious streak can set in that all the training in the world won't ameliorate. This is what leads so many parents to use extremely negative pressures on their teen children (they haven't adapted to a new technique yet) which leads (probably) to most of the issues people have with their otherwise good parents.
I was sneaky. This was partly because I loved my parents and didn't want them hurt/disappointed when they found out about the things I was doing, but mostly because I just wanted some freedom, and this seemed to be an easy way to take it. The few rebellious things I did that my parents did find out about led to a lot of trouble, but physical coercion had to stop pretty early on (though the threat of it lingered effectively for years...)
Then the cycle repeats - one of my daughters is extraordinarily sneaky... and it wasn't the one I expected, the one who seems to think like I do. Turns out they both do, but only one of them can hide it!
sitnspin:
In addition to my rather poor experience as a child (I was "raised" by two selfish and neglectful people who barely acknowledged my existence for most of my childhood), I have severe chemical imbalances that I am only able to maintain control over through a well-established sleep and meditation schedule and keeping my stress levels relatively low. Not only would a child make that all but impossible to maintain, I wouldn't want to risk passing on my illness. Add to that my views on overpopulation and there are plenty of reasons for me to not want kids.
What dislike I do have for kids is primarily based on my experience of being one and the interactions I had with others, PTSD is a pretty terrible thing to deal with as a child (and into adulthood).
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