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Why did Faye's dad kill himself?

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TheEvilDog:

--- Quote from: mustang6172 on 11 Jun 2013, 18:38 ---I'm sorry, but Faye does not come from a very religious family.

I think it's pretty clear that any dysfunction Faye had was with intimacy in general, not sex.  This is why she would sleep with (but not date) Sven.

--- End quote ---

Her mother was Baptist and disapproved of several things, Faye's father's weekly bourbon milkshake for one. Presuming then that her mother disapproved of one shot of bourbon, how would her mother feel if she heard about her eldest daughter losing her virginity? Which would explain why Faye talked to her father, he probably (we don't know for sure) wasn't Baptist and while displeased, he comforted her.

From my personal experience, there's one parent who is kind of cool about certain things, I remember when I was about 15 my father found my stash of porn magazines. I expected him to be furious, instead he told me he put them somewhere else and that I should hide them in a better location because we both knew if my mother found them I would have not heard the end of it...ever. In Faye's case, that parent was her father.

With regards to Faye and Sven, that was pretty much summed up by Zebediah - two people who hate each having sex. Unresolved sexual tension that got resolved without a bang and more like a damp squib.

Back to the main point of the topic. The most telling reason if from Faye in 505.
"That's just it-- I don't know! Nobody knows! He didn't leave a note. If he was depressed it never showed. Even mom has no idea. We... we all loved him so much. It just came out of nowhere. What could it have possibly been? What was so wrong that he had to keep it a secret from everyone he knew, even from his f-fuckin' FAMILY, so he could b-blow his brains out? What did we miss? What did we do wrong? How could he just abandon us like that? How could just abandon m-ME like that? He ruined our lives!"

There was no letter, no message as to why he was ending his life. Even his own wife can't explain why, the woman he married and had two children with. He was loved by his family, there wasn't any trouble that they knew of and yet one morning he went out and shot himself. Which brings up my earlier point, the absolutely horrifying that about suicide is that there isn't always a reason.

sitnspin:

--- Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 11 Jun 2013, 20:41 ---I give you my word that I will not let my pain and anger over what my brother did to us interfere with my respect for you in any way.

It does, however, predispose me to understand the feelings of the surviving Whitakers.

--- End quote ---

Having lost more than my fair share of loved ones, I can and do sympathize with your loss. In the end, it was to avoid hurting my gf at the time (later my wife) that I finally sought real help in earnest. As a continuing (so far) survivor of mental illness, I also have an understandable sympathy with my fellow sufferers, both those still alive and those who did not survive. I think it is important to have compassion for both sides in this situation. Mental illness is difficult for the ones with the illness and for their loved ones with plenty of suffering to go around. Compassion is the key to the situation rather than blame. Once we, as a society, learn to see mental illness as a real medical condition rather than weakness of character perhaps we can put aside the blaming and stigma and actually start to help those affected, both the ill and their families. 

Being angry with someone for committing suicide is akin to being angry with someone who succumbed to cancer, understandable but not exactly fair or rational.  Emotions are not rational, I admit, and it is not uncommon to be angry with a departed loved one even when their death was completely out of their hands. I, personally, had a fair amount of anger toward my wife for dying and she died when we were struck my a drunk driver while fully recognizing how irrational that anger was. Pain and loss often elicits an anger response. Awareness of the irrationality of it did help me to let go of it (for the most part).


--- Quote ---Social conservatism topic: Mrs. Whitaker did not react well to Amanda being gay! Her eventual acceptance was grudging.

--- End quote ---
Social conservatism is not limited to the religious, I can attest to this from experience, but it was fairly well established that Faye's mom is Baptist, a decidedly conservative religious sect.

ThomasEll:

--- Quote from: Zebediah on 11 Jun 2013, 16:54 ---Faye and Sven in an actual relationship? What would that be like?

(click to show/hide)
--- End quote ---

Maybe, but to be honest I don't think that Sven ever really hated Faye. And Faye starts to come round to him before actually hooking up with him. Faye didn't like the fact that he slept around, and I think that if he could have brought himself to be monogamous with her then he could have turned it into a relationship.

Edited to add an equals sign - Method

jwhouk:
There is one aspect that I think may have contributed: the Kentucky Bourbon Milkshake.

Perhaps alcoholism ran in the family, and Dad kept it to himself - until he realized that one day that he was turning into his father/uncle/whatever?

I'd be grabbing at straws with that theory, but it's something Jeph could have left himself an out for if he ever wanted Faye to discover a reason.

Carl-E:
Interesting - especially since "No one knew why", and also no one (except Faye) knew about the drinking. 

And I'm sure the milkshake wasn't the only way he snuck a drink.  Or two...

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