THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)
Fun Stuff => BAND => Topic started by: SleeperCylon on 10 Sep 2007, 15:11
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I was being driven home yesterday, and hard rock radio was playing in the car.
I heard a song by this band 'Hell Yeah'. Basically they're a combination of everything I hate about Linkin Park and everything I hate about Nickelback. I think the song was called 'You Wouldn't Know'.
You couldn’t be, you couldn’t be me even if you wanted to,
Everything I’ve been through. You wouldn't know,
Live your life, soaking up all my sunshine,
And smile your whole life,
I wouldn’t know
Yeah, nobody would ever understand you, because it's not like depressed teenagers who tell people to go back to their sunshine fantasy are a dime a dozen or anything.
It's like the goth kids from South Park had their brains transplanted into adult bodies, learned how to play instruments semi-competently, and signed with a major label.
I'm very sorry the world is crushing your soul. The rest of us grow up, become well adjusted, and gain coping skills. Your coping skill seems to be pretending to be dark and depressed in very shallow, superficial ways. I bet you all went to private schools.
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BUT YOU WEREN'T HONEST
NOW GET IN THE GROUND
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I VANT TO FUCKIN TEAR YOU APAHT!!!
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For me, Fergie still takes the cake. A modern Shakespeare...
"I'm gonna miss you like a child misses its blanket."
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The blanket lyrics conquers all in terms of shittiness.
First, she craps out "My Humps", and now this.
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There's a Canadian band called State of Shock... as if the name isn't bad enough, they had the gall to record this garbage:
If I had more money, honey,
would you love me, love me, love me,
if I wasn't just somebody
like me (like me)
I've made mistakes that I can't erase
I'VE MADE MISTAAAAKES!!!
That's the chorus. The verses are even worse.
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All popular hip hop ever.
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All popular hip hop ever.
fuck you
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"I'm the badass of your classroom / now you've got a badass classroom"
Hands down worst lyric ever. Thanks, Joel Plaskett.
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by this band 'Hell Yeah'
CORRECTION IT IS ALL CAPS
"HELL YEAH"
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Thank you Johnny, I thought nobody was going to correct that, I was aghast.
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"I'm the badass of your classroom / now you've got a badass classroom"
Hands down worst lyric ever. Thanks, Joel Plaskett.
I still love the man, though. Can't help it.
Last lyrics that really grated on my nerves were from "Marble House" by the Knife. I keep listening to it, though. So maybe it's not as bad as I think it is.
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Man, if angsty alternative kids are a dime a dozen, people who feel a compulsive need to moan about them must be about ready to set up their own country. Seriously, coping mechanisms? Private school? Disguising your insecurity with anger and misplaced class hatred is so 1979.
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Has Limp Bizkit released anything lately?? Fred Durst's lyrics are either so bad they're good or so good they're beyond anything I can comprehend, falling into layers upon layers of interweaved irony and sarcasm until only he knows what's up.
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That Plaskett lyric's also pretty awesome. I am not sure what you're talking about.
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All popular hip hop ever.
Fuck off and die.
As for shitty lyrics, about the recent Avril single? 'The smell of your t-shirt reminds me of you/and all the things that you do.' It wouldn't even be SO bad if she hadn't used that same rhyme scheme at least twice before...
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Paul McCartney - Dance Tonight
"Everybody gonna dance tonight
Everybody gonna feel alright
Everybody gonna dance around tonight" (X8)
Seriously, fuck this song.
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All popular hip hop ever.
Pointless. Not funny and completely wrong. Couldn't you just play it safe and say K-Fed or something?
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...Are we still allowed to pick on Trent Reznor?
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SEX BOMB MOMMA YEEAAAH
Wait, I thought this said most appealing lyric I've heard.
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...Are we still allowed to pick on Trent Reznor?
No, the imperialist regime forbids it.
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I have trouble hating on HELLYEAH since Vinnie Paul is the drummer. Even though the album is boring, standard metal.
I usually turn on the HOT JAMZ stations when I want to laugh at terrible lyrics. I nearly had a wreck from laughing the first time I heard this gem in the song "Hood Ni**a"
and i keep a bad bitch around
thick bitch, long hair, yellow, white, red, brown
Oh, and this entire song is awful:
[Chorus: x2]
Soulja Boy Off In This Hoe
Watch Me Crank It
Watch Me Roll
Watch Me Crank Dat Soulja Boy
Then Super Man Dat Hoe
Now Watch Me Do
(Crank Dat Soulja Boy)
Apparently if you can come up with a shitty 'hokey pokey' style dance description lyric and a good beat you can get number 2 in the billboard top 100.
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...Are we still allowed to pick on Trent Reznor?
Funnily enough 'Hurt' was the first thing that came to mind when I read the first half of the title but thank God, I haven't heard it recently.
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Oh, another one to add to the mix... My friend and I were in the university parking lot when this came on the radio, and both being music majors, we were in complete shock when we heard:
"Shake that laffy taffy,
Shake that laffy taffy,
Shake that laffy taffy."
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How about that "I wanna have your babies" song? I don't know who the artist is, so maybe the rest of the world outside of Australia hasn't had the misfortune of hearing it.
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"Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world."
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I work at a gas station. My co-workers insist on listening to the radio rather than my "weird" CDs, so I listen to a whole, whole lot of crappy radio. The lyric that immediately leapt to mind was
I found a reason for me
to change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you.
What I love the most is that they could have just said "change" but they added "who I used to be" just so it would have the right number of syllables.
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How about that "I wanna have your babies" song? I don't know who the artist is, so maybe the rest of the world outside of Australia hasn't had the misfortune of hearing it.
Natasha Beddingfield. I haven't heard it yet and I hope not to. I like her other songs, and I'm afraid that this one will kill her for me.
As for Avril, I love the girl, but I will admit she has some pretty awful lyrics.
"You're so fine, I want you mine, you're so delicious. You should know I'm the motherfucking princess."
Not as bad as her demo stuff, though I suppose that's excusable because she was what, 14?
"No more mirrors. No more vanity. Give it all away for free. Donate it to charity."
Because every charity needs a little more vanity.
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People defending the lyrical qualities of hip-pop?
This forum is dead to me now.
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You make me suuuuicidal, suuuicidal, suuuuiiiiiicidal!
And why is it such an upbeat song? My brain hurts whenever I hear it.
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"You should know I'm the motherfucking princess."
Woah, she's moving in on Daniel's territory.
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Ten seconds left until midnight
Nine chances to drown ourselves in black hair dye.
Jet Black New Year makes me want to tear my hair out.
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"You should know I'm the motherfucking princess."
Woah, she's moving in on Daniel's territory.
He should also get the lyric right:
"Don't pretend I think you know I'm damn precious
And hell yeah I'm the motherfucking princess"
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People defending the lyrical qualities of hip-pop?
move bitch, get out the thread
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I work at a gas station. My co-workers insist on listening to the radio rather than my "weird" CDs, so I listen to a whole, whole lot of crappy radio. The lyric that immediately leapt to mind was
I found a reason for me
to change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you.
What I love the most is that they could have just said "change" but they added "who I used to be" just so it would have the right number of syllables.
It's a non sequitur, too. You could perhaps change how you are "now", but there's no way to change the past.
Shit pop lyrics? Avril I think takes the cake by far. The song about the boy skater (spelled for some reason "Sk8r Boi") takes the idea of a Mary Chapin Carpenter song ("He Thinks He'll Keep Her", my favorite </sarcasm>) and runs with it about as far to the end of irritation that you can do. I realize that there's irony in the opening lyrics, which took some thought, but it's still very lame and ultimately nobody really cares that much, and in the end she's still not even attracted to the guy for anything about his personality, just his fame.
Also Milkshake. Dull, repetitive lyrics behind a really uninteresting beat. It could only be cool on some occasions that it is mocked.
My personal take on bad lyrics? I re-transliterated the lyrics to the song in my sig (which I do think is quite awesome) and put it up on the XKCD fora. Here you go:
I sit and watch the night sky, here all alone
As a shooting star passed through the sky
I wonder if you could have seen it too
And now I wish I could get back to you
But if I could fly and soar through the sky like the shooting star
I would fly to your side, to be right where
You are so far away and I know no matter what I must do
My will and love are strong, and I shall soon reach you
I sit here under the rain, with you in my mind
Remembering all the lovely things you've said
You once said the stars are lovely after the rain
And with your words in my heart, how can I complain
But if I could fly and soar through the sky like a shooting star
I would cast the brightest light, to shine into
Your heart, and though we've had to part, I know when you watch the sky
Your sorrows may not leave you, but you will smile and shine
I don't want you to fight, there all alone
I shall somehow reach you and find my home...
If I could fly and soar through the sky like a shooting star
I know I'd reach your side, even though
You are so far away, but in this single moment in time
We light up the night together as we travel through
The sky, somehow, living nowhere but here and now,
I would be right by your side, forever for all time
(OVERLY SAPPY)
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You have not felt pain until you've heard the song "Body Count Anthem" by the band Body Count.
Substitute the words "Body Count" for the letters "BC"
Body Count, Body Count, Body Count, Body Count,
Body Count, Body Count, Body Count.
BC, BC, BC, BC, (muthafucka)
BC, BC, BC, BC,
BC, BC, BC, BC,
BC, BC, BC, BC.
Body Count, Body Count, Body Count, Body Count,
Body Count, Body Count, Body Count, Body Count.
BC, BC, BC, BC,
BC, BC, BC, BC,
BC, BC, BC, BC,
BC, BC, BC, BC.
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"You should know I'm the motherfucking princess."
Woah, she's moving in on Daniel's territory.
He should also get the lyric right:
"Don't pretend I think you know I'm damn precious
And hell yeah I'm the motherfucking princess"
Eh, yeah I guess I should have looked it up. I was typing it out from memory. But I do also think the "You're so fine...." line is bad, which is why I wanted to include it. By the way, I'm a girl.
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Ah, basically you merged lines from the ends of that verse
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OH EM GEE Another rap song that is about *gasp* sex! The lyrics are just...wow...I don't want to know this amount of information about where/how people have sex. And I REALLY do not want to know his fantasies.
I wanna, li-li-li-lick you from yo' head to yo' toes
And I wanna, move from the bed down to the down to the to the flo'
Then I wanna, ahh ahh - you make it so good I don't wanna leave
But I gotta, kn-kn-kn-know what-what's your fan-ta-ta-sy
I wanna get you in the Georgia Dome on the fifty yard line
While the Dirty Birds kick for t'ree
And if you like in the club we can do it
In the DJ booth or in the back of the V.I.P.
Whipped cream with cherries and strawberries on top
Lick it don't stop, keep the door locked don't knock while the boat rock
We go-bots and robots so they gotta wait til the show stop
Or how 'bout on the beach with black sand
Lick up your thigh then call me the Pac Man
Table top or just give me a lap dance
The Rock to the Park to the Point to the Flatlands
That man Ludacris (woo) in the public bathroom
Or in back of a classroom
How ever you want it lover lover gonna tap that ass soon
See I cast 'em and I past 'em get a tight grip and I grasp 'em
I flash 'em and out last 'em
And if ain't good then I trash 'em while you stash 'em
I'll let 'em free
And the tell me what they fantasy
Like up on the roof roof tell yo boyfriend not to be mad at me
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Ten seconds left until midnight
Nine chances to drown ourselves in black hair dye.
Jet Black New Year makes me want to tear my hair out.
That was the first Thursday song I ever heard. I like those guys! Especially their Ny Batteri cover.
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Runs_With_Scissors: Man, I never knew Ludacris could be so subtle!
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move bitch, get out the thread
If you got beef we can roll wit it.
A playa drinkin Megas, Makas, cranberry vodka
Wearin a mink coat thats furry as Chewbacca
Also, dance/techno style music is shooting fish in a barrel for poor and repetitive lyrics. But the lyric "I've got my hat hat, pimpin' in my shirt shirt" combined with this video (http://www.kovideo.net/videos/w/Watch-My-Feet/Watch-My-Feet.html) is really funny.
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Hawthorne Heights- Ohio is For Lovers
So cut my wrists and black my eyes (cut my wrists and black my eyes)
So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.
Because you killed me,
You know you do, you kill me well, you like it too and I can tell,
You never stop until my final breath is gone.
It's not just that it's bad, it's the delivery that really "makes it". Where to start? The neo-hardcore vocals behind the neo-emo whiny vocals, the angsty suicide and murder lyrics, the Sesame Street rhyming scheme (italicized herein for emphasis). Throw in the fact that it makes no sense as death is final but he keeps being killed, and well, by someone who likes it, too, after having been killed already by that same someone, who at that time took his last breath, which should preempt the further "killings" but somehow doesn't. And this monstrosity is just the chorus.
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Ten seconds left until midnight
Nine chances to drown ourselves in black hair dye.
Jet Black New Year makes me want to tear my hair out.
That was the first Thursday song I ever heard. I like those guys! Especially their Ny Batteri cover.
To be honest, I find Thursday quite listenable, but those words just make me cringe every time.
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Speaking of gangsta rap, there's a line from Ghostface Killah that I can't decide whether it's incredible or horrendous. Either way, you think, did he really just say that?
Niggas want me dead but they scared to step to me.
Rip they guts out like hysterectomy.
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I watched the video for System Of A Down's "Lonely Day".
The lyrical hook for the song is "The most loneliest day of my life", sung by the band's guitarist who sounds like Rivers Cuomo's whiny bitch of a kid brother (if he exists).
I refuse to say any more.
Oh, and Sean Kingston's "Beautiful Girls". If you don't know, pity me and all the poor souls who heard it.
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All popular hip hop ever.
(http://images-eu.amazon.com/images/P/B00005B1KA.02.LZZZZZZZ.jpg)
Seriously, guys, stop it. Don't deny that the Chronic is the shit.
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All popular hip hop ever.
Seriously, guys, stop it. Don't deny that the Chronic is the shit.
The Chronic = Not crap based solely on The $20 Sack Pyramid skit.
And everything else.
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TheLetterM, your avatar makes me happy.
Also, I have no idea who sings it or what it's called, but there's a song on the CD that plays at Payless that drives me crazy. There's a regular verse and whatever, but then all it does is repeat "to the sound" for what seems like ten goddam minutes. It drives me crazy everytime I hear it at work.
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I called her on the phone
And she touched herself
she touched herself
she touched herself
i called her on the phone
and she touched herself
I laughed myself to sleep
from Say Anything - Wow, I Can Get Sexual Too
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^^^ I love that song! :-D
Basically everything said in The Way I Are (yes... the way I are...)
"thug it out til we get it right"
...right.
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The entire Sisters of Mercy back catalogue with special emphasis on A Slight Case of Over Bombing.
Cradle of Filth, pick any song.
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I watched the video for System Of A Down's "Lonely Day".
The lyrical hook for the song is "The most loneliest day of my life", sung by the band's guitarist who sounds like Rivers Cuomo's whiny bitch of a kid brother (if he exists).
He does have a brother, dunno if he's younger or older, though.
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Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
I got it from my mama.
I got it from my mama.
I got it from my mama.
I got it from my mama.
Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
Baby where'd you get yo body from?!
I got it from my mama.
I got it from my mama.
I got it from my mama.
I got it from my mama.
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ARGH FUCK.
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Oh, and people usually disagree with me, but I'm going to add an Interpol lyric by one Paul Banks.
"The trouble is
That you're in love with someone else."
No fucking shit, mate.
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You know of all of Banks' <a href="http://www.stylusmagazine.com/feature.php?ID=1308>appalling lyrics[/url], I enjoy the fact that you picked a fairly unobjectionable bit.
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Oh yeah, he has a ton of bad lyrics, but something about that one really annoys me. I think because it sums up maybe 50% of the pop songs ever written - oh gee, you love someone else instead of me. And that is a problem. NO SHIT. HWE*(GIBDGIBAS
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Pop-Country. Someone posted the lyrics to the "Check you for Ticks" for whatever the fuck, and when I had to listen to that stupid song on the PA at work (I have since quit that job) I actually knew what the dude was going on about, and it killed me inside. Fuck you, whoever you are.
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I'm way too cool for ya boy
that's why it'll never work
I'll have you suicidal, suicidal
when I say it's over.
The other version is a flaming pile of squirrel shit too, but JoJo's version might be the cuntiest song ever recorded.
P.S. Who thought giving this BP a record deal was a good idea?
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"Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world. Around the world, around the world."
Those are beautiful lyrics!
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The lyrics are better when you picture the robots and the skeletons.
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I haven't read all the nominations, so apologies if mine is a repost. But, for consideration for worst lyrics ever, I offer the following gem:
"I make it rain, I make it rain, I make it rain on dem hoes."
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The entire Sisters of Mercy back catalogue with special emphasis on A Slight Case of Over Bombing.
Cradle of Filth, pick any song.
Most appalling, not most awesome.
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Another HELLYEAH song:
A little bit of sunshine
A little bit of booze
A little bit of me
And a little bit of you
A little bit country
A little bit of blues
A slice of heaven
And a little piece of you...come on
Alcohaulin' ass
Pour another drink in my glass
Alcohaulin' ass
Alcohaul...in' ass
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The entire Sisters of Mercy back catalogue with special emphasis on A Slight Case of Over Bombing.
Cradle of Filth, pick any song.
Most appalling, not most awesome.
Maybe they read it as 'Most Appealing' ?
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Alcohaulin' ass
Pour another drink in my glass
Alcohaulin' ass
Alcohaul...in' ass
SERIOUSLY EVERYONE STOP QUOTING AWESOME LYRICS
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If you can't laugh at a song titled "Alcohaulin' Ass" then you have no soul.
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"Believe in Myself" from the Sonic Adventure vocal soundtrack thing.
Continuing the tradition of hinting at a vague homoerotic relationship between Tails and Sonic.
Not to mention,
"Many friends help me out
In return I help them
Certain things I can do
And there's things only I can do"
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I really dislike the Thursday song War All the Time.
I couldn't pick just one bad line to post from it too but these two versus really just bother me
And our lives float in the headlines, so we parked these cars
Parent’s garage
Listen to the lullaby
Of Carbon Monoxide
War all of the time
In the shadow of the New York skyline
We grew up too fast falling apart
Like the ashes of American flags
If the sun doesn't rise
We'll replace it with an H-bomb explosion
A painted jail cell of blood in the sky like Three Mile Island
Nightmares on TV they used to sing us to sleep
They burn on and on like an oil field
Or a memory of what it felt like
To burn on and on and not just fade away
All those nights in the basement the kids are still screaming
On and on and on and on
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You know of all of Banks' <a href="http://www.stylusmagazine.com/feature.php?ID=1308>appalling lyrics[/url], I enjoy the fact that you picked a fairly unobjectionable bit.
Yeah what the fuck, that's easily one of my favourite Banks lines. And that article doesn't even have the worst ones - in fact, I quite like a few of them ("Oh look, it stopped snowing"). The new record has some dire lyrics, you could have at least picked those.
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LFO's "Summer Girls," hands down.
specifically the chorus:
"New Kids On The block,had a bunch of hits
Chinese food makes me sick.
And I think it's fly when girls stop by for the summer,for the summer
I like girls that wear Abercrombie and Fitch,
I'd take her if I had one wish,
But she's been gone since that summer..
Since that summer"
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Oh man, I forgot about LFO.
Schooby-do-wop and Scooby Snacks
I met a fly girl and I can't relax
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The new record has some dire lyrics, you could have at least picked those.
How are things on the West Coast?
I hear you moving real fine
You wear those shoes like a dove
Now strut those shoes
Paul, doves don't wear shoes and I don't wear doves. WHAT WERE YOU ON WHEN YOU WROTE THIS SHIT?
Don't get me wrong though, it's still an OK album.
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Are we listening to the same record?
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Not sure, got mine at the release party. Did yours come with all the Carlos Dengler cock shots?
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I'm not sure what this song is or who sings it but these two verses just annoy the hell out of me.
She goes above and beyond her call of duty.
She is a slut but X thinks it's sexy.
Sex reminds her of eating spaghetti.
I am wasted but I'm ready.
Why am I dealing with this feeling?
I'm maxxed out like a credit card
I'll continue to be my worst enemy.
It's easy but it seems so hard.
You're near but you seem so far.
WHY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
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"Lucky that my breasts are small and humble, So you don't confuse them with mountains" - Shakira
"I ain't never seen an ass like that, the way you move it you make my pee-pee go 'Doing-doing-doing'" - Eminem
"Young, black and famous, with money hanging out the anus" - P Diddy (!!!!)
"I'm hot 'cos i'm fly, you're not 'cos you're not, this is why, this is why i'm hot" - Mims
"Don't they know my nigga Gutter fuckin’ kidnap kids? Fuck ‘em in the ass, throw ‘em over the bridge." - Biggie
" Is that yo ass, or yo momma half reindeer?" - Nelly
"this bitch is fine, I done came to the club 'bout fifty-eleven times. Now can I play with your panty line. . . ?" - Lil John
Yep, Rap music sure is great...
(Read: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN2VqFPNS8w (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rN2VqFPNS8w))
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Anything by Britney fuckin' spears or 50 cent.
Actually...any pop. It all just translates into:
'Fuck me. Gimme some. Yeh. Boobies. Fuck me some more. Get lost, I got more hoes coming in a bit.'
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Actually...any pop.
You are an idiot.
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Ya know,
I told Jay I did a song with Coldplay.
Next thing I know he got a song with Coldplay.
Back in my mind I'm like damn, no way.
Yep. Kanye West is awesome...
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Actually...any pop.
You are an idiot.
Hey now, hey now... there's no need for the hostilities...
Everyone is entitled to their opinion, even if it is broad and generic.
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No, people who say all pop or rap is crap really should just shut it. It's for their own good, they'll look less stupid that way.
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this applies for rap too. F'realz.
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Aguilera has had some nice songs. Voice Within, for example, but then nice songs don't get as much attention as songs about getting Dirrty, so I can understand if the good ones don't come to mind right away.
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The one beef I have with her is that she CANNOT stay on pitch.
Vocal divebombs, meh.
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It it's pop and it isn't mainstream is it still really pop?
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Yes.
What would you call Britney Spears if she wasn't mainstream / sold a whole bunch of records?
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Crazy.
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Pop-Country. Someone posted the lyrics to the "Check you for Ticks" for whatever the fuck, and when I had to listen to that stupid song on the PA at work (I have since quit that job) I actually knew what the dude was going on about, and it killed me inside. Fuck you, whoever you are.
Brad Paisley. That's who it is.
Fuck you, Brad Paisley.
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IM DA SEVENTH LETTER OF THE ALPHABET,YEA IMMA G!!!
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Guys stop being silly modern rap and pop are awful.
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It it's pop and it isn't mainstream is it still really pop?
That depends on how you define pop. To some, pop defines any music that isn't jazz or classical. To others, it's anything that's catchy. To others, it's manufactured boy bands and girl bands. Does a metal song stop being metal just because it gets to number one, and as such could be called mainstream?
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'Fuck me. Gimme some. Yeh. Boobies. Fuck me some more. Get lost, I got more hoes coming in a bit.'
I laughed so hard while reading that. I might have to sig it.
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If I offer to buy you a drink
Trust me when I say it's non-alcoholic
You're no good to me if you can't even speak
I don't want you passing out I want you sucking my dick
If I offer to buy you a drink
Trust me when I say it's non-alcoholic
I want you to wake up and remember my name
When you're washing my cum off your fucking face
My name is Casanova
I'm basically a man
I have the head of a wolf
The appetite of an entire land
This song is going out to the girls
You're all looking well buff
I'm sick of all this long term shit
I just wanna fuck
Gallows are shit.
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It it's pop and it isn't mainstream is it still really pop?
Robert Christgau calls it "semipop".
Not that you should listen to Robert Christgau.
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If something is pop and is anything else then it is still pop. Do you need a venn diagram or something?
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All popular hip hop ever.
Actually...any pop.
I will raise my eyebrow, ignore that, and think only of ignorance.
But there are some terrible lyrics out there:
sean kingstons beautiful girls,
Almost all of Avril's newest CD
and most definately anything by simple plan.
EDIT:
Oh, and I forgot Akon, he irks the hell out of me
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If I offer to buy you a drink
Trust me when I say it's non-alcoholic
You're no good to me if you can't even speak
I don't want you passing out I want you sucking my dick
If I offer to buy you a drink
Trust me when I say it's non-alcoholic
I want you to wake up and remember my name
When you're washing my cum off your fucking face
My name is Casanova
I'm basically a man
I have the head of a wolf
The appetite of an entire land
This song is going out to the girls
You're all looking well buff
I'm sick of all this long term shit
I just wanna fuck
Gallows are shit.
What's with them getting on the tv these days? They're so uninspired it hurts, and that guy's vocals... And why the hell are they getting to do stuff with Lethal Bizzle? Weird, especially when you think of all the good hardcore in the UK.
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Quite possibly the worst lyrics (sung with one of the worst voices) I've ever heard. Thank you Biz Markie:
Have you ever met a girl that you tried to date
But a year to make love she wanted you to wait
Let me tell ya a story of my situation
I was talkin' to this girl from the U.S. nation
The way that I met her was on tour at a concert
She had long hair and a short miniskirt
I just got onstage drippin', pourin' with sweat
I was walkin' through the crowd and guess who I met
I whispered in her ear, "Come to the picture booth
So I can ask you some questions to see if you are a hundred proof"
I asked her her name, she said blah-blah-blah
She had 9/10 pants and a very big bra
I took a couple of flicks and she was enthused
I said, "How do you like the show?"
she said, "I was very amused"
I started throwin' bass, she started throwin' back mid-range
But when I sprung the question, she acted kind of strange
Then when I asked, "Do ya have a man," she tried to pretend
She said, "No I don't, I only have a friend"
Come on, I'm not even goin' for it
This is what I'm goin' sing
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
And you say he's just a friend, oh baby
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
But you say he's just a friend, oh baby
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
But you say he's just a friend
So I took blah-blah's word for it at this time
I thought just havin' a friend couldn't be no crime
'Cause I have friends and that's a fact
Like Agnes, Agatha, Germaine, and Jacq
Forget about that, let's go into the story
About a girl named blah-blah-blah that adored me
So we started talkin', getttin' familiar
Spendin' a lot of time so we can build
A relationship or some understanding
Of how it's gonna be in the future we was plannin'
Everything sounded so dandy and sweet
I had no idea I was in for a treat
After this was established, everything was cool
The tour was over and she went back to school
I called every day to see how she was doin'
Everytime that I called her it seemed somethin' was doin'
I called her on my dime, picked up, and then I called again
I said, "Yo, who was that?" "Oh, he's just a friend"
Don't gimme that, don't even gimme that
Jus' bust this
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
And you say he's just a friend, oh baby
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
But you say he's just a friend, oh baby
You, you got what I need but you say he's just a friend
But you say he's just a friend
So I came to her college on a surprise visit
To see my girl that was so exquisite
It was a school day, I knew she was there
The first semester of the school year
I went to a gate to ask where was her dorm
This guy made me fill out a visitor's form
He told me where it was and I as on my way
To see my baby doll, I was happy to say
I arrrived in front of the dormitory
Yo, could you tell me where is door three?
They showed me where it was for the moment
I didn't know I was in for such an event
So I came to her room and opened the door
Oh, snap! Guess what I saw?
A fella tongue-kissin' my girl in the mouth,
I was so in shock my heart went down south
So please listen to the message that I say
Don't ever talk to a girl who says she just has a friend
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"The trouble is
That you're in love with someone else."
Paul Banks has certainly written his fair share of crap, but I actually think this line is brilliant. He sets the listener up to expect something perplexing and insightful, but then delivers "you're in love with someone else," which strikes me as a great example of the use of deadpan delivery and understatement to evoke dark humor.
Perhaps it was completely unintentional, but I still think it's great.
Oh, and to answer the original question...
Three Days' Grace: "Pain" & "Animal I Have Become"
I didn't even know these were by the same band, but they quickly became the two songs on the radio I hate more than any others:
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
You're sick of feeling numb
You're not the only one
I'll take you by the hand
And I'll show you a world that you can understand
This life is filled with hurt
When happiness doesn't work
Trust me and take my hand
When the lights go out you will understand
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Anger and agony
Are better than misery
Trust me I've got a plan
When the lights go off you will understand
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like it rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing
Rather feel pain
I know (I know I know I know I know)
That you're wounded
You know (You know you know you know you know)
That I'm here to save you
You know (You know you know you know you know)
I'm always here for you
I know (I know I know I know I know)
That you'll thank me later
I can't escape this hell
So many times i've tried
But i'm still caged inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one will ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal
(This animal, this animal)
I can't escape myself
(I can't escape myself)
So many times i've lied
(So many times i've lied)
But there's still rage inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one will ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal
Somebody help me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
Somebody wake me from this nightmare
I can't escape this hell
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"The trouble is
That you're in love with someone else."
Paul Banks has certainly written his fair share of crap, but I actually think this line is brilliant. He sets the listener up to expect something perplexing and insightful, but then delivers "you're in love with someone else," which strikes me as a great example of the use of deadpan delivery and understatement to evoke dark humor.
No, really. Coupled with "It should be me" repeated twice it becomes borderline devastating.
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Really. You would have to be Morrisey to get away with that, and even then people would smirk.
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I've got something to add. Bartender by T-Pain.
"She made us drinks, to drink,
we drunk 'em, got drunk,"
May I just say, WTF?