THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

Fun Stuff => BAND => Topic started by: mberan42 on 08 Feb 2009, 19:35

Title: Music History Time Machine
Post by: mberan42 on 08 Feb 2009, 19:35
You've been given access to a Time Machine. Trouble is, stipulations have been put on its use: you can only use it once, you will return immediately to the present upon completion, and you are only allowed to change one moment in music history.

What would you change in music's history? What one moment, one song, one album, one artist, one band would you change? Would you prevent Beethoven from going deaf? Stop Marvin Gaye's father from killing him? Something else completely? What would you change?

While there are a few minor things I'd change/prevent - stop Queen from recording We Will Rock You, stop the Beach Boys from recording Barbara Ann (sounds too much like my last name when they sing it) - there is one specific incident I'd stop from happening:

"John, this is Yoko. Yoko, John."

You?
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Dazed on 08 Feb 2009, 19:40
I would kick Chris Martin's pregnant mother down a set of stairs.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Inlander on 08 Feb 2009, 19:44
I'd go back to February 1959 and insist to a young pilot named Roger Peterson that it's not safe weather for flying (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddy_holly#Death).
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Be My Head on 08 Feb 2009, 19:56
I can't really think of anything...I guess if I could, I would stop either Frank Zappa or Chuck Schuldiner from getting cancer?
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Jughead5267 on 08 Feb 2009, 20:08
Well I guess this kinda goes along with the op's...
Mark David Chapman wouldn't have woken up on December 8, 1980.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: onewheelwizzard on 08 Feb 2009, 20:14
... yeah, I'd rather do that than anything else I can think of.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Christophe on 08 Feb 2009, 20:20
I'd pour sugar into Jeanette Sliwinski's gas tank.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: DarkAvenger on 08 Feb 2009, 20:36
Yeah I was just thinking the same thing...
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: sean on 08 Feb 2009, 20:44
I'd go back to 1996 and punch each and every member of Jimmy Eat World in the face until they agreed to break up.

I know, its sad, but its for the best.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Christophe on 08 Feb 2009, 20:52
Hey, their stuff from when they actually sounded like they were from the Midwest US emo scene is kind of decent.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: squawk on 08 Feb 2009, 21:01
i'd go back to october 21, 2003 and hide all the knives in elliott smith's house
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Spluff on 08 Feb 2009, 21:03
I'd probably just confiscate tour vehicles from the many bands who manage to crash them (looking at you, stevie ray vaughan).

Also, I'd slap whoever decided that Slo Burn wasn't worth keeping together.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Wardial3r on 08 Feb 2009, 22:04
i'd go back to october 21, 2003 and hide all the knives in elliott smith's house

Exactly what I was thinking when I read the opening post. 

Also, would have stopped Casey Calvert from O.D. ing.  Somehow. 

New Hawthorne Heights is terrible. They just have empty spaces where the screams should be.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: De_El on 08 Feb 2009, 22:18
Hide all the sharp objects and long cords in the Curtis family home.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Wardial3r on 08 Feb 2009, 22:39
Hide all the sharp objects and long cords in the Curtis family home.

Clearly joy division didn't already produce wayyy too much material, a fraction of which is worth listening to. 
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: De_El on 08 Feb 2009, 22:42
Haha! Your jokes are funny. I laugh so much.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Christophe on 08 Feb 2009, 22:47
"One domestibot for... Brendan Canty? Brendan Canty. Oh, and it came with a telegram: "Now you can take care of your children AND play with Fugazi at the same time!""
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: onewheelwizzard on 08 Feb 2009, 23:06
Wait a second, I know.  I'd just go back and turn Jimi Hendrix over in his stupor so he didn't just choke on his own vomit.  Him or John Bonham.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Wardial3r on 08 Feb 2009, 23:28
Haha! Your jokes are funny. I laugh so much.

:) i'm slick.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Cire27 on 09 Feb 2009, 00:00
I'd go back to February 1959 and insist to a young pilot named Roger Peterson that it's not safe weather for flying (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddy_holly#Death).

This made me sad.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: pwhodges on 09 Feb 2009, 05:26
I would prevent Henry Purcell's early death; if he had lived a normal lifespan, he would have reached his peak around the time that Handel arrived in England - and that would have got really  interesting.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: valley_parade on 09 Feb 2009, 05:29
"Lars, just stop whining and let Cliff sleep over there."

CRUNCH.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Hat on 09 Feb 2009, 05:31
Probably take a shit on Frank Zappa or something.

No particular reason why, I just think it'd be fun.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Inlander on 09 Feb 2009, 05:45
Hey, if I go back in time can I hang around for a few years to get a twofer? 'Cause I'd also like to go to 1956 and disable Nancy Powell's car (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clifford_Brown#Biography).
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Chymes on 09 Feb 2009, 06:27
Save Jeff Buckley back in 1997... Bet on a few sporting events whilst I was there and come back and you know, go to every venue on his next tour :)
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: michaelicious on 09 Feb 2009, 07:57
I would convince D. Boon to wear a seatbelt.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: imapiratearg on 09 Feb 2009, 08:16
I'd tackle the dude who shot John Lennon and wrestle him to the ground.

Or convince all the members of Nickelback that music is not the right career for them and they are destined for far greater things outside of music.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: valley_parade on 09 Feb 2009, 08:32
I always wanted to take a copy of the Ramones self-titled album back to say, 1955, and just give it to someone.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: sean on 09 Feb 2009, 08:34
Hey, their stuff from when they actually sounded like they were from the Midwest US emo scene is kind of decent.

I know, thats why it's sad. It had to be done before it was too late though.

Then emo would be all okay.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: onewheelwizzard on 09 Feb 2009, 11:36
I always wanted to take a copy of the Ramones self-titled album back to say, 1955, and just give it to someone.

Oh man I suddenly have a really strong desire to go back in time to one of the first-ever acid tests in San Francisco in 1966 and drop a Shpongle album into the sound system and see what happens.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: michaelicious on 09 Feb 2009, 13:27
I already saved D. Boon, man.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: el_loco_avs on 10 Feb 2009, 02:21
i'd go back to october 21, 2003 and hide all the knives in elliott smith's house

Sadly i think he'd succeed in killing himself eventually. He had already jumped off a cliff before XO  :-(

I would kick Chris Martin's pregnant mother down a set of stairs.

I thought "what's the problem with Gwyneth?" but then I got it.  :-D



As for my pick. I'd tell Jeff not to go swimming and just meet the band at the airport or something.  Or at least  get him some inflatable armbands.  :x

Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Thrillho on 10 Feb 2009, 03:30
I would go give Syd Barrett a slap and say LAY OFF THE DRUGS.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: michaelicious on 10 Feb 2009, 07:29
Yeah but you told him to put on a seatbelt. That shit won't work, man. He was lying down i the back of the van because he was recovering from an illness. You can't wear a seatbelt lying down.

That's pretty much the entire point of telling him to wear a seatbelt.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Dazed on 10 Feb 2009, 20:15
On second thought though, yeah, I'd probably just take the alcohol/assorted drugs away from Hendrix, Keith Moon, Jim Morrison, John Bonham, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Layne Staley, Shannon Hoon, Brad Nowell, etc etc etc
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Inlander on 10 Feb 2009, 21:00
Actually maybe I'd just go way back and somehow ensure that heroin was never invented. That oughta sort out around 90% of problems and tragedies in the music biz.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Wardial3r on 10 Feb 2009, 21:01
On second thought though, yeah, I'd probably just take the alcohol/assorted drugs away from Hendrix, Keith Moon, Jim Morrison, John Bonham, Janis Joplin, Kurt Cobain, Layne Staley, Shannon Hoon, Brad Nowell, etc etc etc

I'm pretty sure without alcohol/drugs, they wouldn't have mad any music worth anything.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: negative creep on 13 Feb 2009, 04:37
"Lars, just stop whining and let Cliff sleep over there."

CRUNCH.

I, too, dream of Lars Ulrich being thrown through the bus window instead of my Mystikal Master Kliff Burton.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: valley_parade on 13 Feb 2009, 05:16
I mean they still would probably make some shitty albums in the 90s, but at least the drums would have sounded decent.

Christ, St. Anger sounded like Lars was beating a chain-link fence with a baseball bat.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Spluff on 13 Feb 2009, 05:21
The later albums would have been a lot better, most probably. Cliff Burton did a lot of the writing for Metallica and his influence is what kept them on track after Dave's leftover ideas ran out.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Yossarian on 13 Feb 2009, 09:43
I guess I'd travel to Vienna in the 1820s, taking with me some fancy antibiotics and (just to be on the save side) a lifetime-supply of condoms, so that Franz Schubert could have lived beyond his 32. year. And maybe he might have shared some of the stuff with Robert Schumann.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: JD on 13 Feb 2009, 19:30
I'd go back to 1996 and punch each and every member of Linkin Park in the face until they agreed to break up.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: David_Dovey on 13 Feb 2009, 20:42
You guys are thinking way too narrowly. Couldn't we just find a way to make sure that the whole generation of young boys never heard either rap or metal and thus never thought to synergise the two thus averting that whole turd of a movement?

We could punch some folks in the face as well, just cos.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Christophe on 13 Feb 2009, 20:44
If we blew up the studio where Run D.M.C. and Aerosmith were recording "Walk This Way" in, that would take care of many problems.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: valley_parade on 14 Feb 2009, 07:36
Then you also have to wipe Anthrax and Public Enemy off the face of the earth.

Oh well. At least it'd clear up some programming schedules for VH1.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Emaline on 14 Feb 2009, 23:16
But I like both of those groups a lot.

Admittedly, my knowledge of Anthrax is pretty vague, but oh em gees Scott Ian....*swoon*
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: mberan42 on 20 Feb 2009, 15:27
I change my answer. I would push the mother of whoever wrote the $5 Footlong Subway song off a 10 story building when she was pregnant with the composer.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: JD on 21 Feb 2009, 07:23
(http://i160.photobucket.com/albums/t189/inventivehero/FiveDollarFootLong.gif)
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: TLT Thomas on 27 Feb 2009, 18:14
I would go back to May 25th, 1996 and save Bradley Nowell's life. Maybe haul his ass into rehab, too.

Sublime was done WAY too fucking soon.  :-(
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Wardial3r on 07 Mar 2009, 04:51
Throw Bono's pregnant mom down stairs.

Not because I don't like U2... Just because Bono is a pretentious fool.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: The Joker on 07 Mar 2009, 13:34
Steal Duane Allman's motorcycle.  Because then, not only would Duane Allman (probably) still be alive, I'd have a kickass vintage motorcycle that used to be Duane Allman's (or I would make millions on eBay).
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: J-cob9000 on 07 Mar 2009, 14:40
i'd go back to october 21, 2003 and hide all the knives in elliott smith's house
was going to something along these lines.
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: Der Turm, der Leute frass on 07 Mar 2009, 14:49
I'd travel back to 1987 to prevent the early death of Jaco Pastorius
Title: Re: Music History Time Machine
Post by: iamiam on 07 Mar 2009, 18:21
Geez, what do you people have against people's mothers? :\

How about... I would tell Fred Durst's father that maybe he should use a condom.  Or explain to his mother how fun and awesome oral sex can be!