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Fun Stuff => CHATTER => Topic started by: Slick on 14 Mar 2010, 14:25

Title: Toenails
Post by: Slick on 14 Mar 2010, 14:25
OK so one of my favorite classic QC threads was that thread about toilet paper a while ago, wherein we discovered many 'scrunchers' thought they were actually 'folders' and they thought that 'scrunchers' actually did some kind of reckless wasteful crumple-wadding thing with the TP. Also someone said they tried to time their poops before their showers so they didn't need to wipe; I always thought that that was admirable but I have never been able to do it myself.

Anyways, something that is on my mind a lot (well, not a lot, but ever two-three weeks or so) is where the hell do you clip your toenails??? Maybe this is something the rest of the world has already figured out in an elegant fashion, but I am always worried about where I can safely clip them. I do not want to be the guy who leaves toenails on the bathroom floor, but what is a practical solution?
I have tried a) clipping over the tub b) clipping into the toilet c) clipping semi-controlled onto the bathroom floor and sweeping d) clipping outdoors. I do not feel terribly happy with any of these approaches.

Clipping into the tub is fairly practical and simple, especially where I never have hair going down the drain for them to clog with, but I worry about clogging or accidentally leaving a clipping in the tub somehow and having a housemate get bothered and think I am a bad person.
Straight into the toilet became practical once I realized if you cover half the toenail clipper with a thumb, the clipping has to shoot straight down and into the toilet. This is a simple solution, but it requires standing one-footed over the toilet which is not so practical now that my knees are shot.
Clip & sweep is what I used to always do but then I realized if I miss a nail sweeping, people can be bothered by it. It is useful to have to sweep every so often in case you forget but I have found some people totally appalled at this course of action.
Clipping outdoors was pretty nice. It was a sunny spring day with a breeze and I clipped with impunity, but, like landfills, I feel it can't be a long term solution.

So, QC, how and where do you clip your toenails, and more importantly, how do you get rid of the clippings? This is something I have always worried/wondered about!
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: BlahBlah on 14 Mar 2010, 14:30
I clip into a bin. They hardly ever miss and if they do I can easily pick them up and put them back in.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Melodic on 14 Mar 2010, 14:41
bathtuuuuuuuub

also i remember the tp thread. that was a good thread.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: jmrz on 14 Mar 2010, 14:47
Yeah, clip into the bin, you don't have to hover over the toilet and then nobody can be bothered by it.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Dliessmgg on 14 Mar 2010, 14:59
I clip into the sink.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Drill King on 14 Mar 2010, 15:00
I uh, I just do it wherever.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Malek on 14 Mar 2010, 15:02
I eat them. Every. Last. One.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Lunchbox on 14 Mar 2010, 15:03
I do it sitting in bed with my feet hanging off the edge over carpet, then I vacuum later. Nobody except my boyfriend ever comes into my room and he is a boy so he wouldn't notice if there were piles of black mouldy toenails there.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: JD on 14 Mar 2010, 15:04
I never clip my toenails. Somehow they never get very long.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: KharBevNor on 14 Mar 2010, 15:05
I uh, I just do it wherever.

Yeah. What the fuck people, they're just fucking toenails.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Liz on 14 Mar 2010, 15:15
I clip sitting at my desk and vroom vroom with the vacuum afterwards. Quick and painless.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Slick on 14 Mar 2010, 15:39
This is excellent information people! I am always going to clip after the shower now.
It never occurred to me to clip them into a bin. You could sit on the toilet and clip right into the bin!
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Malek on 14 Mar 2010, 15:41
Eat Them. Do it.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Alex C on 14 Mar 2010, 15:42
I usually just clipped 'em over my li'l trash bin I keep near my desk in my bedroom. Typically one goes flying off at an angle though, and if it clears the bin one of my dogs ends up gobbling it up before I can get to it. I have no clue why they do that. Dogs are weird. I now clip them in the bathroom more often than not because of this.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Lines on 14 Mar 2010, 15:42
I'll clip them wherever but I put a small trash can under my foot. There's a small can in every room, so hey, it's easy to sit on a chair or edge of the bed/couch, hook my foot on the edge, and put the bin under. If the nails miss, then I pick them up or vacuum after. Quite simple.

I remember the tp thread, too. Still a scruncher.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Blue Kitty on 14 Mar 2010, 19:03
I clip em in my bed over my waste basket
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: michaelicious on 14 Mar 2010, 20:25
I clip my toenails into your mother.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Sox on 14 Mar 2010, 21:17
Clip 2-3 times on each nail, so they come off in a nice clean arch, hold one end of nail with free hand, clip off with the other.  Drop into a pile on whatever surface is convenient, deposit toenails in bin when done.

Did we ever have a thread about cleaning your ears? I find that conversation way more interesting.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Jimmy the Squid on 14 Mar 2010, 22:51
I clip my toenails while sitting on the couch, usually watching tv. They rarely go flying anywhere, normally the sit behind the blades of the clipper. I leave them on the coffee table and then throw them into the bin or off the side of the balconey if I'm feeling malicious (I don't know why but it makes me feel better somewhat) or if my girlfriend is coming home and I can't get to the bin in the kitchen in time. Sometimes I leave them on the coffee table but then she gets all mad at me and I don't like that.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: snalin on 15 Mar 2010, 00:56
When I was 10 or around there, i could bite them off, but that isn't really possible any more. I usually cut them over a small carpet, and then shake them from there into the bin.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: kemon on 15 Mar 2010, 01:41
i like going outside the best.  as long as it's dry.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: tania on 15 Mar 2010, 05:11
clip 'em wherever, brush them onto the floor, vacuum said floor maybe once a week.
i am aware that i exist pretty much like a beast.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: beat mouse on 15 Mar 2010, 05:18
if vacuuming once a week makes you a beast i am a disgusting bilge creature from the depths of satan's quagmire :(

(read: i clip my toenails wherever i am at the time i decide it needs doing)
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: tania on 15 Mar 2010, 05:29
it's a little more disgusting in the context of that being how i clean literally everything in my room lately - hair, nails, wrappers, bits of food, whatever. put it on the floor. now it is no longer my problem.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: öde on 15 Mar 2010, 12:42
I haven't clipped my toenails in months. They don't seem to grow. Weird!
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Slick on 15 Mar 2010, 14:17
it's a little more disgusting in the context of that being how i clean literally everything in my room lately - hair, nails, wrappers, bits of food, whatever. put it on the floor. now it is no longer my problem.

It is just efficient queueing of tasks! If you put things in the bin each time you'd be constantly going to the bin. Now that we've got a magical machine on wheels which picks garbage up off of the floor, it only makes sense to put garbage straight onto the floor!
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: ibrahimdelil on 15 Mar 2010, 15:02
i clip every 2 weeks*, on the bed, before a shower. toss them in the bin and wash my feet thoroughly while taking the shower.

*i cant help but put everything i do in the mornings in a routine. on workdays i'm like a robot, i could leave the house without even waking up lol.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Zingoleb on 15 Mar 2010, 17:28
When I was 10 or around there, i could bite them off, but that isn't really possible any more. I usually cut them over a small carpet, and then shake them from there into the bin.

Apparently I still can. I had to check.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Lunchbox on 15 Mar 2010, 17:40
Yeah I can still bite my toes too but c'mon, it's pretty grotty.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Inlander on 15 Mar 2010, 17:44
My cat also bites her claws. Do you people lick yourselves clean, too?
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Zingoleb on 15 Mar 2010, 17:45
Shit, I think I popped something in my neck.

No, apparently not.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Scandanavian War Machine on 15 Mar 2010, 17:46
i tried to lick my own back once


and now I'm dead  :x
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: David_Dovey on 15 Mar 2010, 18:05
Just when I think I'm pretty anal retentive the Internet shows up to poke me in the chest and say "fuck youuuuu little man"
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Inlander on 15 Mar 2010, 18:06
I am happy to be retaining my anus.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Lunchbox on 15 Mar 2010, 18:28
My cat also bites her claws. Do you people lick yourselves clean, too?

No but sometimes I lick my cat.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Inlander on 15 Mar 2010, 19:41
Gah! Tongue covered in fur! Ptah!
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Dimmukane on 15 Mar 2010, 19:47
I clip them and put them on my asshole brother's bed.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: David_Dovey on 15 Mar 2010, 21:26
Hilarious!
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Johnny C on 15 Mar 2010, 21:35
i clip them in my bed and roll around and then i never shower and now i'm covered in toenails all the time
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: David_Dovey on 15 Mar 2010, 21:36
There are probably more efficient ways to build yr own exoskeleton doggo
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: Inlander on 15 Mar 2010, 21:43
Are you sure about that? His body is constantly producing the raw material anyway, it's of no other use, and all he has to do is be patient, be smelly, and roll around on the floor every once in a while. Sounds pretty efficient to me.
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: David_Dovey on 15 Mar 2010, 21:55
He could catch psoriasis?
Title: Re: Toenails
Post by: philharmonic on 16 Mar 2010, 09:57
Sit on the bed and clip them. Put them on my dresser and tell the wife ya ya i'll put them away later. Sometimes I do. Sometimes they magically disappear (more likely she cleaned them up on me).