THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

Fun Stuff => ENJOY => Topic started by: Thomas Edison on 06 May 2010, 08:47

Title: Machete
Post by: Thomas Edison on 06 May 2010, 08:47
ohfuckYessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss. (http://www.aintitcool.com/node/44943)

Edited to express my true feelings on the film
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: ackblom12 on 06 May 2010, 08:48
Everything about this movie makes me suspect it will be my new favorite movie.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: the_pied_piper on 06 May 2010, 08:56
There is absolutely nothing that is wrong about this movie in any way, shape or form.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Scandanavian War Machine on 06 May 2010, 10:24
I was wondering when this movie was finally come start showing it's face
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: beat mouse on 06 May 2010, 12:43
Dial M for Mawesome.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Johnny C on 06 May 2010, 14:44
The movie is about an illegal immigrant ex-Mexican Federale going on a rampage against a senator whose campaign is based around the expulsion of illegal immigrants and the tightening of immigration laws, and they frame the trailer as a fucking message to Arizona
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Blue Kitty on 06 May 2010, 16:56
Finally, haven't they been talking about this since Grindhouse?


edit: oh god, why is Lindsey Lohan in this?
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: knives on 06 May 2010, 17:14
edit: oh god, why is Lindsey Lohan in this?
They wanted genuine low rent quality.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Scandanavian War Machine on 06 May 2010, 17:19
they hired Lohan because she'll work for bumps of blow and rides to the liquor store.

also, she'll probably get naked without even realizing it and that's just good business
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Yayniall on 06 May 2010, 18:30
Man I loved Spy Kids.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: David_Dovey on 07 May 2010, 20:14
The movie is about an illegal immigrant ex-Mexican Federale going on a rampage against a senator whose campaign is based around the expulsion of illegal immigrants and the tightening of immigration laws, and they frame the trailer as a fucking message to Arizona

Was that for all the people viewing on their iPhones who couldn't  watch the video?

Anyway: HOLY FUCK IT'S DENIRO
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Ballard on 07 May 2010, 22:10
This movie is being described in the media as "Mexploitation"

I'm so excited I could cry.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Johnny C on 08 May 2010, 00:17
Was that for all the people viewing on their iPhones who couldn't  watch the video?

I just wanted to see what those words looked like, written out. They look beautiful.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: J on 08 May 2010, 00:19
i'm looking forward to seeing steven seagal in this





shit, that's a sentence i never thought i'd type.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Der Golem on 08 May 2010, 09:27
Deniro and Seagal are welcome additions but I gotta say, I thought the first trailer looked a lot better, the new scenes in this one didn't really have that same feel. The other trailer featured gracious tits but no female lead, which I thought was excellent, true to the style. Now we have two glamor girls who are going to to take screen time away from the excellent cast of action heroes, and add class that I don't think belongs in a film like this.

Then again, I am holding this movie to ridiculous standards, complaining about Jessica Alba. This will be a glorious movie.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Barmymoo on 08 May 2010, 10:19
There is absolutely nothing that is wrong about this movie in any way, shape or form.

Lindsey Lohan

add class

I feel like I have fallen into a parallel universe.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Gemmwah on 08 May 2010, 15:11
holy shit
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Der Golem on 09 May 2010, 05:27
Ok so Lindsay Lohan ain't exactly classy, but compared to Machete screwing the bad guys wife and daughter at the same time and them only appearing naked in trailer, you can't deny that having a famous female actor, even Lindsay Lohan, is a pretty huge step up in the class department.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: David_Dovey on 09 May 2010, 08:10
This may sound ridiculous to everybody in the world but am I the only one who kind of feels like actually making a movie out of the trailers from Grindhouse kinda kills the magic?

I mean, my boner is still so massive and huge for this film it's not funny, but.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: David_Dovey on 09 May 2010, 08:35
Yeah I can pretty much find something to complain about with anything
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Alex C on 09 May 2010, 09:44
class

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Dazed on 09 May 2010, 09:50
And furthermore why are we even discussing class? We're talking about a movie birthed from an intentionally classless fake trailer before an intentionally classless B-movie, about a mexican day-laborer-slash-assassin killing machine. Featuring Cheech Marin as a murderous priest.

Class? What? Who needs class?
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Der Golem on 09 May 2010, 14:10
class

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Fair enough. Really, I just thought girls getting more screen time in the new trailer made it somehow less appealing/hilarious than the original one. Guess I phrased it kind of awkwardly?

Still super psyched for this movie though.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Ballard on 09 May 2010, 14:46
This may sound ridiculous to everybody in the world but am I the only one who kind of feels like actually making a movie out of the trailers from Grindhouse kinda kills the magic?

I mean, my boner is still so massive and huge for this film it's not funny, but.

I think a lot of people are worried that the movies won't live up to the quality of the trailers because there's not enough of a premise to work with.

The Hobo With a Shotgun trailer was fantastic but I struggle to see how it could be turned into a feature film and not drag.

If by "magic" you mean "the non-existence of this totally awesome movie", then yes, it rather does kill the magic. With a knife twice as long as your arm.

I didn't take you for the kind of dude who would indulge in irrational, sensational fanboyism. There are possible issues to be had with this movie and it's fair to discuss them, whether or not the community that is producing them is, as a general rule, awesome.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Alex C on 09 May 2010, 15:14
Fair enough. Really, I just thought girls getting more screen time in the new trailer made it somehow less appealing/hilarious than the original one. Guess I phrased it kind of awkwardly?

Still super psyched for this movie though.

Yeah, I know what you mean. Just taking the piss is all. Can't expect a man not to make dumb quotes on the internet, after all.

I think the biggest problem is that the Alba scenes seemed kind of actively lame, particularly when she was apparently trying to rally people. That line has just been beaten into the ground now and she generally has the charisma of a (cute) board. Ultimately though, DeNiro means that all is right with the world.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: KvP on 09 May 2010, 16:12
I agree with Gene on this one. It makes a great trailer but great trailers don't necessarily make great movies. That was the thing with grindhouse films that Tarantino really got right with Death Proof - they were so low-budget that they could only afford a couple of action scenes, leaving the rest of the film as dead weight - dialogues and monologues, usually badly acted and written. The trailers are cut with the action scenes to make them seem more exciting than they actually are. But in the best cases grindhouse films were like noir, in that those dead weight scenes played to the strengths of screenwriters, hence the abundance of memorable lines that came out of noir and blaxploitation films. That's what Tarantino loved so much about grindhouse film that came out in Death Proof (and, along with the sheer length of the double feature, it helped to make Grindhouse a flop at the box office). Rodriguez seemed to just want to make a ridiculous action movie.

Which is fine by me, really. I don't share Tarantino's love for the flotsam of exploitation film. I just don't know if Machete is going to be all that enjoyable.

Eli Roth was set to make Thanksgiving into a feature film as well, until Grindhouse tanked and the Weinsteins fell on hard times. There was going to be a whole series of Grindhouse spinoffs.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Caleb on 10 May 2010, 07:12
Steven Segal???????

OK I am in.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Blyss on 14 May 2010, 16:39
 :-o

FUCK YEAH!  I've been waiting for this.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Storm Rider on 19 May 2010, 03:54
The movie is about an illegal immigrant ex-Mexican Federale going on a rampage against a senator whose campaign is based around the expulsion of illegal immigrants and the tightening of immigration laws, and they frame the trailer as a fucking message to Arizona

Robert Rodriguez has giant goddamn brass balls if that trailer is any indication. Though I suppose you could argue that there's no such thing as bad press with regards to movies.

I think my favorite part of the trailer is how DeNiro's character drops the accent immediately when he's not giving a speech. That little detail says so much about the character.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Blue Kitty on 19 May 2010, 08:28
And then, there's this movie (http://www.traileraddict.com/trailer/danny-trejos-vengeance/teaser-trailer)
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: the_pied_piper on 19 May 2010, 10:37
Now that is real B-movie production.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Yayniall on 19 May 2010, 14:47
It's funny how natural colours and lighting in films make them look so fake.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Jimor on 28 May 2010, 18:56
An online acquaintance has suggested that the best way to have made Sex and the City 2 interesting would have been to randomly replace one of the actresses with Danny Trejo, then have him play the character straight up as if it wasn't even a thing.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Alex C on 28 May 2010, 19:00
I would watch it.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Barmymoo on 29 May 2010, 02:45
Actually that would work for any movie, sequel or not.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Inlander on 29 May 2010, 03:25
The closest we'll probably get is when Harvey Keitel wore a dress in Holy Smoke.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: yellowfoliage on 01 Jun 2010, 21:11
Rodriguez does not give shit one about real grindhouse cinema, and that's a very good thing. As somebody who has sat through a lot (a lot) of old exploitation flicks, I can say that most of them are, as emulated flawlessly by Tarantino, 70 minutes of straight garbage and eight or nine minutes of cool action scenes that are for the most part not enough of a reward. With Planet Terror, Rodriguez produced something that was more a throwback to 80s John Carpenter, and that's what Machete appears to be as well.

And you know what? The world needs more filmmakers who think like John Carpenter in the 80s.
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: Scandanavian War Machine on 02 Jun 2010, 15:02
80's John Carpenter was the shit. I still watch those movies and they never get old.

also, I now have an excuse to repost this glorious glory (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rT7AH4JyuNs)
Title: Re: Machete
Post by: scarred on 02 Jun 2010, 15:19
that video never gets old.