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Title: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 29 Sep 2010, 12:42
I'm as angry as you are. (http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/09/star-wars-converted-for-3d-release-in-2012#more-34390)
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Liz on 29 Sep 2010, 14:15
Fuck the world.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Kugai on 29 Sep 2010, 22:06
Now we know, he has gone to the dark side.


The time has come - time to make Spaceballs II: The Search For More Money
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: JD on 29 Sep 2010, 22:12
(http://i.imgur.com/8fOKk.jpg)
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: ALoveSupreme on 30 Sep 2010, 05:30
I mean, are people really going to see this?  Wasn't pretty much everyone unanimously pissed/annoyed that he did anything to the final three chapters, let alone release the prequels?  I guess maybe, like, clueless suburban parents will take their 6 year olds, but... really?  And hasn't the 3d ship almost sailed?  There is so much I don't understand about this business decision.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KharBevNor on 30 Sep 2010, 08:27
George Lucas basically views the Star Wars films as living documents which he can defile for his own sick amusement. Anyone remember how, originally, he wasn't going to release the unedited versions of the original Star Wars trilogy on DVD?
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: mberan42 on 30 Sep 2010, 15:28
(http://thisorthat.com/blog-images/double-facepalm.jpg)
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Kugai on 30 Sep 2010, 17:46
I'll leave the last word up to ol' wheezy breathe himself

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tim5nU3DwIE
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KharBevNor on 30 Sep 2010, 19:26
It is astonishing how bad that scene looks.

Is anything in that thing not CGI?
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: est on 30 Sep 2010, 22:16
Yeah, that scene is a great full-stop/summation of the new trilogy.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 30 Sep 2010, 22:17
I felt kind of a reflexive wave of pity and shame when I heard that "Noooo!" for the first time, but somehow I'm not even really sure if that's the worst part.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 30 Sep 2010, 22:19
I just felt nauseated. I think I actually facepalmed in the theatre.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Dazed on 30 Sep 2010, 22:28
It's definitely not the worst part. The worst part is *SPOILER ALERT LOL* after Obi-wan chops Anakin in half, and he starts trying to claw his way up a mountain whilst on fire and reciting his awful teen angst. It's unintentional comedy on Wicker Man levels, I literally burst out laughing in the theater at what was supposed to be a tragic climax of the series.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 30 Sep 2010, 22:30
If I facepalmed it was only a instinctive attempt to hide my identity from anyone in the theater who might recognize me.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 30 Sep 2010, 22:35
Obi-wan chops Anakin in half, and he starts trying to claw his way up a mountain whilst on fire

But remember, we can't criticize Lucas because the movie is For The Kids.™
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Inlander on 30 Sep 2010, 22:50
It's definitely not the worst part. The worst part is *SPOILER ALERT LOL* after Obi-wan chops Anakin in half, and he starts trying to claw his way up a mountain whilst on fire and reciting his awful teen angst.

I think somebody's consciousness has suppressed all memory of the Hayden Christensen/Natalie Portman picnic sequence.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Kugai on 30 Sep 2010, 22:53
That was just ultrasoft porn
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 30 Sep 2010, 23:13
The only time I burst out laughing during Sith was when Obi-Wan said, his voice trembling with emotion, "I saw Anakin... killing younglings."
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: LeeC on 30 Sep 2010, 23:22
The only time I burst out laughing during Sith was when Obi-Wan said, his voice trembling with emotion, "I saw Anakin... killing younglings."
I didnt laugh so much as I noted "they are just trying waaaaayyyyy to hard...could have just said children or just omitted that line entirely.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Cartilage Head on 02 Oct 2010, 06:58
I KILLED THEM ALL

AND NOT JUST THE MEN. BUT WOMEN...AND THE CHILDREN

(http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c213/hey_there_fatty/THEWOMEN.jpg)

Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: LeeC on 02 Oct 2010, 12:42
I KILLED THEM ALL

AND NOT JUST THE MEN. BUT WOMEN...AND THE CHILDREN

(http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c213/hey_there_fatty/THEWOMEN.jpg)


nah that line was fine, it was the acting that was terrible.  They should have hired Heath Ledger (rip) he could have pulled it off.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Kugai on 02 Oct 2010, 12:52
But the serious question is is what the hell is wrong with Lucas??!!!!


I've never seen one man so damned determined to frak up his own legacy as he has lately.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: J on 02 Oct 2010, 19:29
But the serious question is is what the hell is wrong with Lucas??!!!!


I've never seen one man so damned determined to frak up his own legacy as he has lately.

the simple answer is that it wasn't just his legacy alone, but he's been the one who got all the credit for over 30 years (http://herocomplex.latimes.com/2010/08/12/star-wars-was-born-a-long-time-ago-but-not-all-that-far-far-away-in-1972-filmmakers-george-lucas-and-gary-kurtz-wer/)
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KharBevNor on 03 Oct 2010, 11:51
I think it's almost fair to say that Star Wars was great despite Lucas. Remember, he only directed and wrote the script for the original Star Wars, and that was when he was under the tightest control from producers etc. He basically just produced and wrote story outlines for the others.

It seems to me quite common in film-making that when someone gets the opportunity to do exactly what they want, with complete creative control, unlimited funds and no editorial oversight, then about nine times out of ten they will deliver some ridiculous fucking garbage. I'm not sure why this is: part of it I'm sure has to do with the fact that some people need to have their ideas picked over and have the stupid ideas weeded out (something that hasn't happened to Lucas for decades). Part of it might have to do with intricacies of the film-making process: it's an artform like no other in the sense of just how many people are involved and how many of them have a crucial creative role. Actors, editors, special effects teams, sound designers, costume, props and makeup, even camera operators and lighting techs are all creative people. If the director is just dictating on pure ego and has to have everything just their way, then it stifles the creativity of these people and they're more likely to just phone it in. Furthermore, ramping up the pressure and forcing people to improvise often creates some of the most iconic moments in film.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 03 Oct 2010, 13:00
Yeah, I think people forget how often even in writing just how much editorial input there can be or the impact a good collaborator can bring to the table even if it's only for a moment. It reminds me of John Cleese talking about how Monty Python was basically split into two writing teams, one of which being him and Graham Chapman. Cleese has claimed before that he often wrote the vast majority of their material but that Chapman's intuition as to what was funny was still valuable. Maybe Cleese wrote most of the lines but if it weren't for Chapman they would have been returning a toaster instead of a dead parrot.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Caleb on 03 Oct 2010, 17:57
Chapman came up with calling it an Norwegian blue as well and I think that made the skit.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 03 Oct 2010, 19:02
Yeah, without Chapman it would have been a dry sketch about stubborn salespeople and how many euphemisms the British have for dead. Instead we now have pining for the fjords.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: satsugaikaze on 10 Oct 2010, 02:17
I think it's almost fair to say that Star Wars was great despite Lucas. Remember, he only directed and wrote the script for the original Star Wars, and that was when he was under the tightest control from producers etc. He basically just produced and wrote story outlines for the others.

George Lucas just happens to be the biggest and easiest target to pick on as well, so when anything shitty to do with him happens, the blame falls square on his shoulders. I think there most certainly is bad writing in the later movies, but everybody's already used to proclaiming the prequel trilogy as the biggest unwatchable steaming pile of shit in the history of sci-fi.

Or at the very least that's the vibe I get from most people who hate the prequels.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: look out! Ninjas! on 10 Oct 2010, 03:41
The prequel trilogy are actually bad movies though, it's not just because they didn't live up to the impossibly high bar set by everybody.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 10 Oct 2010, 18:01
I think the most unforgivable bit is that the characters were either really dry or comic relief with very few characters really splitting the difference between the two. When Han Solo makes most of your new characters look one dimensional merely by splitting the difference between the daring rogue and good-hearted buffoon archetypes, then well, you have a pretty serious problem. The originals weren't exactly character studies, after all, but at least the principles weren't always locked into exposition mode. I know it sounds dumb, but little things like the Han shooting the intercom bit can make all the difference.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Ozymandias on 10 Oct 2010, 21:12
Also, it's nice when there's likable protagonists.

In the original movies, Luke, Han, and Leia were all immediately likable and relatable. Anakin is awful 100% through the prequels, Amidala's dry and boring, and Obi-Wan is the only half-decent character in all three movies and even he's pretty much a nitwit just for ever even associating with Anakin.

To be honest, the only character I came away from the prequels liking more because of them was Palpatine because he found himself surrounded by morons and made the best of it. The genocidal, megalomaniacal best of it.

If fact, I'm just sticking with that. Palpatine was the only redeeming part of the prequels, because he actually schemed and plotted and wasn't just a cackling weird old man asshole who shoots lightning. Vader suffered a serious blow due to how seriously I can take a man who thinks comparing a chick to sand is a decent pick up line, but Palpatine went up a couple of notches there.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 10 Oct 2010, 21:29
I thought Obi-Wan was a pretty solid good guy all around, but that's probably just because Ewan McGregor is inherently likable. And Qui-Gon was awesome.

Other than that, yeah, no real relation. Even 3PO and R2's gags got were annoying after a while.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: LeeC on 10 Oct 2010, 21:33
and if you look at it there was no real central character to phantom menace, arguably it was qui gon, but he was so one dimensional and kind of just moved the story along, like obi-wan in a new hope.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 10 Oct 2010, 21:43
I kinda dislike McGregor for some reason, but not really due to Star Wars. I kind of give most of the actors involved with it a free pass, really. If Liam Neeson wasn't particularly interesting me I don't really see why I should expect McGregor to be able to do so with the same writers and direction. Same deal with Samuel L. Jackson. How the hell do you manage to make Sam Jackson with a fuckin' laser sword boring?!
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Kugai on 10 Oct 2010, 21:50
........ How the hell do you manage to make Sam Jackson with a fuckin' laser sword boring?!

Editing?
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 10 Oct 2010, 21:52
It takes pure directorial talent to make Natalie Portman seem like a D-list actress.

Well, that and lines like "*crying* You're breaking my heart!" after establishing in the first two movies she is a strong-willed independent woman. derp
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Ozymandias on 10 Oct 2010, 21:56
To be fair, Obi-Wan suffers partially from the fact that it's a prequel and we knew 20 years before the movie that Anakin's gonna be evil.

But...it's not exactly hard to see that coming, I think, solely from the prequels. Obi-Wan still kind of comes off as stupidly headstrong in trying to train Anakin. Plinkett makes the good point that we never actually even get to see the two really do anything not stupid and good and buddy cop movie. Anakin's always arguing with and disobeying Obi-Wan and it's obnoxious and I consistently cannot watch those movies without wondering why he puts up with his shit.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 10 Oct 2010, 22:11
It probably would have helped if they could have established more of a father-son dynamic between the two rather than the weird near equals thing they had going. A long suffering father/prodigal son dynamic is kind of in the works at times, but it's undermined by the timeline and the way the movies skip straight to Anakin being too big for his britches. You can obviously infer this kind of stuff from making some assumptions between titles, but that's hardly the same thing as a movie showing you their bond and making you believe in it.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Ozymandias on 10 Oct 2010, 22:24
When you actually state it like that, I totally see that and can understand how the relationship can be more compelling. But man, I sure as hell didn't see that while attempting to watch it.

It's interesting, while the first movie has long served as a case of a well done archetypal hero's journey and ESB has served as the go-to incredible sequel and demonstration of a stellar second part of a trilogy, the prequels will forevermore serve as a demonstration of how to do it completely wrong and be referenced as such for many years to come. While there have been many, many, many bad movies, none illustrate it and are as widely known to do so as well.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 10 Oct 2010, 23:19
It definitely is a grim reminder of the "Show, don't tell" maxim.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Kugai on 11 Oct 2010, 15:22
It's a pity the prequels were not up to standard really, they could have been so much better if George had just sat back and left them in the hands of others and taken an 'Executive Produce' type role.

There was so much potential there, and it got royally stuffed up.



Jarjar Binks should have died in the first five minutes.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: David_Dovey on 12 Oct 2010, 01:50
I don't really understand why- or how- anybody has the energy to be pissed off or even surprised that George Lucas is further alienating long time fans of Star Wars by doing more unnecessary shit. As far as I'm concerned, that boat sailed in 1997 and everything that happened after that was just like pissing in the ocean. If the ocean was made entirely of piss.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: JD on 12 Oct 2010, 08:02
I don't really care. I was just doing what all the cool kids were doing.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: look out! Ninjas! on 12 Oct 2010, 22:23
I'm not surprised, but I am pissed off that when I inevitably want to get the original movies on blu-ray or whatever comes after that I'll be forced to either get some stupid version of them with more CGI than is tasteful, or not at all.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KvP on 25 Oct 2010, 14:44
Remember when everyone liked Star Wars and Star Trek was the one you were supposed to be embarrassed about liking?

lol (http://io9.com/5671581/george-lucas-reported-creating-new-star-wars-sequel-trilogy-thats-not-about-the-skywalkers)
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 25 Oct 2010, 14:54
In my social group Star Trek has always been the top dog, really, although that's probably a direct result of my age group. I was born in 1982 so I'm the same age as the Wrath of Khan and a year older than Reading Rainbow with TNG debuting when I was 5. So, basically, I spent the first 12 years of my life watching LeVar Burton.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 25 Oct 2010, 16:41
Well, and comparing them doesn't even really make sense. It's just something people do because they both have "Star" in the title. I mean, Star Wars is pure space fantasy, whereas Star Trek, priding itself in its canon and technological nerdery is science fiction. I like both, thank you very much, but they're very different products and the whole "Star Wars VS. Star Trek" issue isn't an issue at all, it's just a bunch of nerds yelling at each other for no reason because they're nerds.

Despite Star Wars being heavily involved in my youth via action figures and the expanded universe, the volume of simply awesome Star Trek material is astounding, and I'd have to say if I had to choose one it'd be Trek. There are other factors, of course, but having one bad show and one exceedingly mediocre show out of five series doesn't negate the fact that Deep Space Nine and The Next Generation are two of my favorite television shows of all time. Star Wars couldn't even do three whole movies right (lookin' at you, Ewoks. Haven't been able to finish Jedi in years).
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KvP on 25 Oct 2010, 18:02
Part of it is that before Episodes 1-3, Star Wars had a sterling reputation as having 3 really great films that had mass appeal, whereas the only film in the Star Trek franchise that had something close to wide acclaim was Wrath of Khan, with pretty much every other iteration in the series (especially the odd-numbered ones) being considered fairly awful. Plus, you know, Star Wars = Light sabers ; Chewie ; Death Star. Star Trek = Plainly stated humanist values ; We're trapped in a Shakespearean holodeck program again! ; Here's a planet where we learn that nazis still would have been bad had they won WWII.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 25 Oct 2010, 20:51
There were way too many Nazi episodes of Star Trek. And by way too many, I mean more than none.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KvP on 25 Oct 2010, 22:24
Arrrrrgh pagebreak

There were way too many Nazi episodes of Star Trek. And by way too many, I mean more than none.
Hey you! * I thought you wrote "less than" for some reason!
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 25 Oct 2010, 22:42
All I know is that 5 year old Alex C was deeply impressed by both light sabers and the li'l ear canal monsters.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KharBevNor on 26 Oct 2010, 04:08
Yeah there were no heavy handed allegories for Nazis in Star Wars at all.


(http://newmoonprops.com/imperial_officer.jpg)
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: JD on 26 Oct 2010, 08:05
That's not even mentioning stormtroopers.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: jackmort on 26 Oct 2010, 08:22
The Empire was a mixture of Nazism and War of Independence era Britain. Double-whammy
Few things are more sinister to an American than a Nazi with an English accent
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KharBevNor on 26 Oct 2010, 09:48
I'm pretty sure they're just the Nazis actually.

Nazis always have British accents in Hollywood. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xJq1f_8bw4)
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: jackmort on 26 Oct 2010, 10:00
Hah monkey dust, so dark

Nazis mostly do have English accents in Hollywood films, but why though?
I do think it's probably got something to do with the war of independence. The British empire covered a wider area than the third reich ever conquered. I think Gibraltar's all we've got left now

I'm gonna say that the storm-trooper's outfit is symbolic of a roman toga too, three evil empires in one!
ridiculous
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 26 Oct 2010, 11:04
Yeah there were no heavy handed allegories for Nazis in Star Wars at all.

Yeah but Star Trek would literally go back in time and have actual nazis.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KharBevNor on 26 Oct 2010, 11:43
If we're thinking of the same episode, Patterns of Force, it's actually a contemporary alien planet (where everyone looks pretty much like humans because, STAR TREK) where a federation historian has somehow ended up and turned the planet into a rehash of nazis out to exterminate some really thinly disguised space jews, under the extremely stupid belief that the nazis would actually work out pretty well if they hadn't been totally evil as all hell. It was probably a pretty brave if rather flawed episode at the time, plus it also managed to have a budget of fuck all since they just hauled out all paramounts nazi costumes and space nazi chancellery was just the Desilu offices with some big swastika flags draped all over it.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 26 Oct 2010, 12:01
There's that one, and then this one. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Storm_Front_%28Star_Trek:_Enterprise%29)

Although I'm not sure what we're discussing anymore other than subpar episodes of Star Trek.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Ozymandias on 26 Oct 2010, 13:16
Yeah, those Nazi episodes of Enterprise were the bottom of the bottom of the barrel, basically a big "fuck you" from Berman and Braga to Manny Coto, the dude who was taking the show from them and made the last season genuinely enjoyable.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KharBevNor on 26 Oct 2010, 13:48
I didn't watch much Enterprise, for much the same reason that, having once stepped in dog shit by accident as a child, I am now careful to avoid doing so again.

Patterns of Force ain't even probably one of the ten stupidest episodes of ToS. New thread?
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: LeeC on 27 Oct 2010, 06:47
sort of on subject, they plan to re-release all 4 indiana jones in 3d in theatres too,
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: KvP on 27 Oct 2010, 09:45
I'm on record as a Temple of Doom apologist. Fuck all y'all.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: J on 27 Oct 2010, 10:07
i like temple of doom too. it's no raiders, but i like it better than last crusade. (sean connery notwithstanding of course)

Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: Alex C on 27 Oct 2010, 10:12
I'd like Temple of Doom sooo much better without Kate Capshaw. As it is I'd rather give it a pass.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: scarred on 27 Oct 2010, 12:12
Temple of Doom wasn't awful but it was by no means good. That being said, I've willingly watched it and enjoyed it multiple times.
Title: Re: Star Wars 3D Re-Releases Confirmed
Post by: satsugaikaze on 04 Nov 2010, 03:48
^ This. I watched it as a kid and it scared the fuck out of me.

Few years later, it was one of the most enjoyable movies I'd seen! Although I probably had issues because I found myself relating to Short Round an awful lot