THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)
Comic Discussion => QUESTIONABLE CONTENT => Topic started by: iduguphergrave on 21 Oct 2012, 07:59
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PARTY! Nothing says party like a banana hammock:
(http://i.imgur.com/5DD2o.png) (http://imgur.com/5DD2o)
Enjoy!
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CLAIRE: You mean that's mechanical too?! How did--
CLINTON: New hand, random porn encounter, improper calibration. I don't want to discuss it further.
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OK, thread's over.
We have a weiner!
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Well that was easy. See ya'll Wednesday. 8-)
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Claire: "OMG, there's a brain slug on your back!"
Clinton: "Hmmph, I'm not falling for that one again."
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Claire: "Where did you get those?"
Clinton: "Your drawer."
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Clinton: I don't see why you can comment. You're not a guy.
Claire: No, but even I know the potato goes in the front!
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Claire: "Put on some sunblock will y'a! We're redheads. We get sunburnt easily. Remember what your bottom looked like after that trip on Lake Erie in '96?"
Clinton: "Giving these brand new photovoltaic melanocytes a test run first. Gimme your vibrator. I'll recharge the batteries for you. May be you won't be so uptight then?"
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Claire: "... Remember what your bottom looked like after that trip on Lake Erie in '96?"
That would have been zebra mussel rash.
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CLAIRE: You mean that's mechanical too?! How did--
CLINTON: New hand, random porn encounter, improper calibration. I don't want to discuss it further.
Wow. Thread over in the first reply.
Claire: How can you wear that??!
Clinton: How can you not? It's like wearing nothing at all.
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...Nothing at all!... NOTHING AT ALL!!
(Stupid Sexy Clinton?)
But I agree, MDBS just knocked it out of the park.
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Again, applause to MDBS. When I had a peek at work I thought about a callback to myself (http://forums.questionablecontent.net/index.php/topic,28182.msg1095751.html#msg1095751), but no way, this one's done.
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85 is a damn lot of these things.
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But we haven't heard the whole conversation:
Claire: "Your pants certainly don't leave much to the imagination."
Clinton: "Actually, since my last upgrade, they do."
CLAIRE: You mean that's mechanical too?! How did--
CLINTON: New hand, random porn encounter, improper calibration. I don't want to discuss it further.
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CLAIRE: "You're nothing special. I know another guy with an artificial hand named Smith ... "
CLINTON: "Oh yeah? What'd he name his other hand?"
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I'm reckoning panel one or four could make for some interesting stuff as a caption contest.
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Hard to beat... so I'll just riff instead:
CLAIRE: You mean that's mechanical too?! How did--
CLINTON: I asked rudely for a banana smoothie. I don't want to discuss it further.
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More riffing the wiener:
CLAIRE: You mean that's mechanical too?! How did--
CLINTON: New hand, random porn encounter, improper calibration of the autonomous mode. I don't want to discuss it further.
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Might as well play along, eh? 8-)
CLAIRE: You mean that's mechanical too?! How did--
CLINTON: Robo-Hand and I were playing a game of Hide The Sausage that went horribly wrong.
:-D
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Did you just win TWICE, with a kicker to your OWN caption?
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That's it - this thread needs a reboot - our friendly neighbourhood expensive powertool has not only won the thread he's made it impossible to stop chuckling.
Well done.
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I seem to be some kind of creepy horrifying-groin-injury-humor savant. This happens in conversation, in MMORPGs and tabletop RPGs. Other writers have consulted me for ideas, believe it or not. (*)
(*) LIES!
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You must have seen the machine belt injury story?
Probably more than once.
Do not follow this link if you are squeamish:
http://www.snopes.com/risque/penile/scrotum.asp
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Many times, in fact it was one of my standard "machine shop safety" training stories. :)
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CLARIE: So is there ANY part of you that's not "upgraded?"
CLINTON: Asshole.
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*sigh* You guys...
(http://i.imgur.com/pWedw.png) (http://imgur.com/pWedw)
:-P
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Marten: "Can you believe how fast Million Dollar Beltsander won the first part of the week?"
Faye: "Yes, it was an extremely humourous response not easliy topped."
Emily: "What are you talking about?"
alt
Marten: "How is it my responsibility to feed and water?"
Faye: "You've seen my ability with a toaster."
Emily: "So that was you. You ruined a perfectly good body there."
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Martin: MDBS should sit out the next round, just say'n.
Faye: That ain't likely he'll drop in with some hilarious groin injury joke and it's over.
Emily: I love groin-injuries.
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FAYE: "Repetitive groin injury?"
MARTEN: "It got caught in a belt sander."
EMILY: "Banana smoothie!"
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Faye: "Even for you that's s lame swimsuit."
Marten: "Hey, it's the same style my mother uses!"
Emily: "Anyone want a hand grenade?"
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MARTEN: "Look, I'm taking her off the pitcher's mound. She's been throwing cans of corn the whole game, and the other strip has been hitting them out of the park something positive."
FAYE: "She just needs to put a little pepper on it, is all."
EMILY: "Coming right up!"
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Marten: Can we at least her friend-spade?
Faye: Fine, but you have to take her to the clinic.
Emily: I like muskrats!
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Marten: "A ritual for Dagon? That's your answer for everything."
Faye: "It's May Eve in Massachusetts and the lake's swarming with the larvae of the Deep Ones (http://forums.questionablecontent.net/index.php/topic,28342.msg1106163.html#msg1106163). What do you think she's planning?"
Emily: "Iä! Iä!"
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(http://irc.peeron.com/~funkytuba/yellowpepper.png)
Marten: I wish in the invitation she'd been more explicit than "a cookout" about this Iron Chef thing we're going to do.
Faye: <brandishes knife> I'm prepared.
Emily: Theme Ingredient: Muskrat! ALLEZ CUISINE (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mhAPrBddfM)!
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CLARIE: So is there ANY part of you that's not "upgraded?"
CLINTON: Asshole.
That an insult, or an explanation?
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CLARIE: So is there ANY part of you that's not "upgraded?"
CLINTON: Asshole.
That an insult, or an explanation?
That's for the reader to decide. 8-)
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MARTEN: "Think we ought to tell her the secret?"
FAYE: "I dunno. I think the Riversmith incident is for those who've been with the comic for over 100 strips."
EMILY: "Oh, Mr. Mulholland already told me about Ms. Corsetto."
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CLARIE: So is there ANY part of you that's not "upgraded?"
CLINTON: Asshole.
That an insult, or an explanation?
That's the joke. And well played, too.
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Marten : Can I borrow a 20?
Faye : First Sven, now Steve? What is it with you and butts?
Emily : Diseased rhymes with siezed, squeezed and teased!
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Faye: "Can I tell Marigold about the gamecube (http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=2047) swimming in the lake?"
Marten: "Only if you tell her about the snapping turtles, too."
Emily: "I call the big one 'Bitey'."
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Marten: ... So, how do you reckon the comic will end for you?
Faye: Oh, that's easy. I'm gonna burn your apartment down again, then I'm gonna move back down south.
Marten: Sounds like a cheery prospect. What about Hannelore?
Faye: She's probably gonna turn out alright, if only by necessity.
Marten: The necessity of her friends being even more messed up than her?
Faye: Pretty much. She's got a hell of a coping mechanism. What about you, Emily? How d'you reckon it'll end up for you?
Emily: Oh, I'm going to be the one who snaps and goes on a psychotic rampage! It's so easy to tell that I've already started picking out my serial killer mask and my axe! I'll be a mad axe murderer!
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Faye: "Muskrat!!"
Marten: "Muskrat Muskrat *sigh*"
Emily: "Beaver,"
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Faye: "Muskrat!!"
Marten: "Muskrat Muskrat *sigh*"
Emily: "Beaver,"
Save a tree, eat a beaver.
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MARTIN: Wonder where Dora and Tai are...
FAYE: Wouldn't it be funny if they were delayed by a couple of old nudist-hippies after making a wrong turn?
EMILY: Oh, I see you've met the Johnsons as well. Nice folks.
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EMILY: Oh, I see you've met the Johnsons as well. Nice folks.
I see what you did there
Since I posted the second image earlier than usual, I think we could do with a bonus image:
(http://i.imgur.com/91pbn.jpg) (http://imgur.com/91pbn)
Hooray!
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Hannelore: Look, you're just a voice in my head. If I'm going to get close enough to them to kill them all, you need to keep quiet for a little while.
Voice: Keep quiet? Keep quiet!? That's it, I'm bringing back the rapping penis!
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Hanners: "Of course I respect you. How many invisible, flying men do you think I know? And after last night.."
Invisi-dude: "You could at least keep you eyes above my neck when you say that."
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HANNERS: "We must never, ever speak of what we saw at that older couple's house on the other side of the lake."
INVISIBLE FLYER AI: "Take down the Facebook photo album, then?"
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Hannelore: You could always go hang out with Spaceship, or even Station...
Flyer: They're still mad at me over the "talking moon" prank I pulled last week.
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Hannelore: "Look, I know Station was working on getting you that holoprojector, but it won't work inside her house."
Stealth AI: "But she has an iPhone or iPad, right? I can use that, can't I?"
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HANNERS: "You're a stealthed VTOL flying vehicle which may or may not have aerospace capability. How the HELL can you have a groin injury?"
FLYER: "I don't know how Million Dollar Belt Sander did it, but he did it."
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Hannelore: Here I stand. By a serene lake. After many years of struggle I'm still plagued by my OCD. Is this my lot in life? Can you give me a sign?
Voice of God: Don't be fruitful and multiply. You are not ready for that. But you can count. add, divide and subtract. That is your gift to the world. Use it. Go in peace, my child. And strive to make a difference.
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Hannelore: "OK, I know this is a bit sudden and all, and I really do like you a lot, but I just don't think we should see each other any more."
Stealth-Ship: "But… you've never seen me? I'm transpa… wait, is that a visibility joke? That's just low."
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HANNERS: "You're a stealthed VTOL flying vehicle which may or may not have aerospace capability. How the HELL can you have a groin injury?"
FLYER: "I don't know how Million Dollar Belt Sander did it, but he did it."
HANNERS: Don't be absurd, invisible stealth-mecha don't have groins.
HOVERBLIMP: ...how little you understand of robot-reproduction. Talk to your father.
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Hanners: "Wait, if I can't see you, does that mean..."
Invisible voice: "No, it doesn't work that way. I can see you fine!"
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Hanners: "Just, don't tell mom about it, okay?"
Stealth Blimp AI: "All right, but Mr. Craig is going to be late for the premier in London, you know."
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Hanners: "So what did Clinton do after he found out I was going to be here?"
Stealth Blimp: "He went home and jacked off until his robotic hand fell off."
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HANNERS: "Groin injury--? How did you--"
HOVERBLIMP: "Hit the docking pad with my gear up. Oy did that smart."
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HANNERS: "You just went visible again for like a half-second there. You'd better get out of here before your cloak fails."
FLYER: "No problem. I'll just retract the tail fins and pull in the sensor mast, and people will think I'm a sun hat."
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Hanners: "Look, people don't like it when an invisible robot grabs their butt."
Stealth Ship: "Then give me back that 20 if you don't want to ask."
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Hanners: "Look, people don't like it when an invisible robot grabs their butt."
Stealth Ship: "Then give me back that 20 if you don't want to ask."
I think you just moved into the lead with that one.
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(http://i.imgur.com/91pbn.jpg)
Hannelore: "So you're going to be monitoring that Clinton guy?"
Stealth Blimp AI: "Yeah. Station's already got the lasers set up on the station. When you hear the tone on your headset, get about 30 yards away, pronto."
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Hannelore: "So you're going to be monitoring that Clinton guy?"
Stealth Blimp AI: "Yeah. Station's already got the lasers set up on the station. When you hear the tone on your headset, get about 30 yards away, pronto."
Hannelore: "They're also going to want some popcorn for the party. Can you handle that?"
Stealth Blimp: "Sure, just get the popcorn set up, and I can divert the laser after frying Clinton."
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HANNERS: "You just went visible again for like a half-second there. You'd better get out of here before your cloak fails."
FLYER: "No problem. I'll just retract the tail fins and pull in the sensor mast, and people will think I'm a sun hat."
Magnificent.