THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)
Comic Discussion => QUESTIONABLE CONTENT => Topic started by: iduguphergrave on 09 Dec 2012, 10:32
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Good morning, Questionables! (did we ever reach a consensus on what QC fans should call themselves? I thought we did but now I'm not sure) FIRST PANEL:
(http://i.imgur.com/IYmn2.png) (http://imgur.com/IYmn2)
Enjoy!
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MATCHMAKERPC: "Oh, that reminds me ... your new companion's name is 'Pintsize.'"
MARTEN: "..."
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Matchmaker: "Thank you for your understanding of the need to shower after talking to Pintsize."
Marten: "Yeah, but did you see that furry threesome he found?"
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MATCHMAKER: "So THAT'S how you keep it a secret while wearing such tight jeans..."
MARTIN: "Yup, articulation seams. "
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MATCHMAKER: That's...impressive.
MARTEN: It's the turgidity.
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MATCHMAKER: "So THAT'S how you keep it a secret while wearing such tight jeans..."
MARTIN: "Yup, articulation seams. "
"It's roughly the size of my forearm and fist, and about as dextrous." (http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=764)
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MARTEN: That was by far the most satisfying DNA extraction technique ever performed on me.
SALESLADYPC: Yeah, I hear that a lot. Please come back in nine months to meet your new AI buddy.
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MATCHMAKERPC: I have to admit beforehand, these aren't natural.
Marten: That's okay, neither is th-- shoot...
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Marten: So, what do you think?
Pintsize: You're right! Actually BEING a hot chick is so much better!
(Aaarrgh :psy:)
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"It's roughly the size of my forearm and fist, and about as dextrous." (http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=764)
Bow-chicka-uh-oh... >.< I remember that one...
Marten: So, what do you think?
Pintsize: You're right! Actually BEING a hot chick is so much better!
That...takes the pre-emptive cake. Alright, who can top this? XD
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Matchmaker: You've been with a RealDoll? I've never had the pleasure of one...they're creepy.
Marten: They're not so bad once you get past the Uncanny Valley (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncanny_valley).
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LadyBot: (buttoning up) "I would like to continue with you, Mr Reed, but this concludes the testing and calibration of your new robotic enhancement..."
Marten: "The pleasure was all mine."
LadyBot: "... At this point I am legally obliged to disclose to you that some of our past customers have reported certain rare and unquantifiable side effects. There is an unproven theory that the combination of a laid back personality and our product will cause your body to produce pheromones that young women with a selected range of psychological problems find particularly irresistible. It's explained in detail in the small print. I need you to sign a waiver?
Marten: "Eh? You're saying that chicks will go crazy near me. I fail to see the problem. Where do I sign?"
Marten: So, what do you think?
Pintsize: You're right! Actually BEING a hot chick is so much better!
(Aaarrgh :psy:)
OMG. That's a win right there.
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MATCHMAKER: So you learned that trick from watching hours and hours of porn?
MARTIN: Damn right.
MATCHMAKER: Have I the PERFECT companion for you!
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"
LadyBot: "... At this point I am legally obliged to disclose to you that some of our past customers have reported certain rare and unquantifiable side effects. There is an unproven theory that the combination of a laid back personality and our product will cause your body to produce pheromones that young women with a selected range of psychological problems find particularly irresistible. It's explained in detail in the small print. I need you to sign a waiver?
Marten: "Eh? You're saying that chicks will go crazy near me. I fail to see the problem. Where do I sign?"
No. THIS is the winner, right here.
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Ladybot: "I should probably tell you this will be our last meeting. Tomorrow, I'm downloading into the new Sony KawaiiPC HPC-4100x in a few days. Maybe I'll see you again. (http://www.questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1298)
Marten: "Maybe."
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Ladybot (unbuttoning): "Are you sure it will all fit?"
Marten: "I think so."
Squints at Ladybot
Marten: "Your shoulders are about as narrow as mine. Size 6 right?"
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OK, that right there? That's creative brilliance.
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Marten: Do you read Oglaf? Cause there's this one fantasy I got from it that I'm totally hung up on...
Ladybot: Say no more! GORDON! GET IN HERE!
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LadyBot: Just a question Mr. Reed. Who is "Veronica?"
Marten: Oh, just someone I know. You kinda remind me of her.
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:psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck:
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Ladybot (unbuttoning): "Are you sure it will all fit?"
Marten: "I think so."
Squints at Ladybot
Marten: "Your shoulders are about as narrow as mine. Size 6 right?"
What Carl-E said, to which I will add: WIN.
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LadyBot: (buttoning up) "I would like to continue with you, Mr Reed, but this concludes the testing and calibration of your new robotic enhancement..."
Marten: "The pleasure was all mine."
LadyBot: "... At this point I am legally obliged to disclose to you that some of our past customers have reported certain rare and unquantifiable side effects. There is an unproven theory that the combination of a laid back personality and our product will cause your body to produce pheromones that young women with a selected range of psychological problems find particularly irresistible. It's explained in detail in the small print. I need you to sign a waiver?
Marten: "Eh? You're saying that chicks will go crazy near me. I fail to see the problem. Where do I sign?"
Marten: So, what do you think?
Pintsize: You're right! Actually BEING a hot chick is so much better!
(Aaarrgh :psy:)
OMG. That's a win right there.
[re: Skewbrow's caption] No. THIS is the winner, right here.
While I am quite... "proud" of my own caption, I have to agree, that is brilliant Skewbrow.
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Marten: "Your shoulders are about as narrow as mine. Size 6 right?"
But are her wig and spectacles detachable? Come to think of it, why is she wearing spectacles?
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Marten: "Your shoulders are about as narrow as mine. Size 6 right?"
But are her wig and spectacles detachable? Come to think of it, why is she wearing spectacles?
Same reason she's wearing any clothing and has a feminine physique rather than a bare featureless chassis.
It disturbs humans less.
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Are you disturbed by people who don't wear glasses?
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Glasses are an appropriate part of a uniform that signals clinical detachment. They go with the tight bun.
People without glasses don't necessarily disturb me, but I've had consistently better experiences with people who do wear glasses.
Matchmaker: "Those shorts look comfortable! Does the same company make bras?"
Marten: "Ohh, yeah, they have a see-through number that's just right for you!"
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MATCHMAKER: "Are we undressing or dressing?"
MARTEN: "I'm not here to get philosophical."
Ladybot (unbuttoning): "Are you sure it will all fit?"
Marten: "I think so."
Squints at Ladybot
Marten: "Your shoulders are about as narrow as mine. Size 6 right?"
I feel stupid for not really getting how this is funny... oO
(Is it a quote or something?)
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It's a takeoff on a trope of switching clothes / identities. At least, that's how I saw it...
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That was pretty epic :mrgreen: NEW PANEL:
(http://i.imgur.com/Xw5EX.png) (http://imgur.com/Xw5EX)
cump
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Gordon: The little hats.....
Marten: Yesssssss.
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Gordon: I'm just gonna lean over a bit here, so I can fuck you in the ear...
Marten: Please don't tell me you're the AI I'm getting matched up with.
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Gordon: "Hmm, difficult. Very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind, either. There's talent, oh yes. And a thirst to prove yourself. But where to put you?"
Marten: "Not Slytherin. Not Slytherin."
:psyduck:
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GORDON: Bow to your God, human!
MARTEN: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
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Gordon: "Hmm, difficult. Very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind, either. There's talent, oh yes. And a thirst to prove yourself. But where to put you?"
Marten: "Not Slytherin. Not Slytherin."
:psyduck:
Win
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Gordon: "Hmm, difficult. Very difficult. Plenty of courage, I see. Not a bad mind, either. There's talent, oh yes. And a thirst to prove yourself. But where to put you?"
Marten: "Not Slytherin. Not Slytherin."
:psyduck:
Nice! And you saved (at least some of) us the trouble of searching a suitable Sorting Hat line. But I'm still tempted to continue that dialogue...
Gordon: "Wrong answer!.... Wrong answer? OMG...." (pair of tentacles swells, turns purple, and falls off)
or alternatively just go with something different such as
Gordon: "Dandruff and sweat into my silk gland again. Hello, yeast infection. Thank you very much. For your sake I hope the biometrics won't be thrown off."
Marten: "?"
LadyBot (off-screen): "Gordon, this job is your CALLING."
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ok fine... one more hit on this theme then I'll shut up:
(http://i.imgur.com/IYmn2.png) (http://imgur.com/IYmn2)
Marten: Do you read Oglaf? Cause there's this one fantasy I got from it that I'm totally hung up on...
Ladybot: Say no more! GORDON! GET IN HERE!
(http://i.imgur.com/Xw5EX.png) (http://imgur.com/Xw5EX)
Marten: That's not quite what I meant...
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Gordon: "I want to taste your fluids!"
Marten: "Move down two feet. They are conveniently outside my body now."
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A nice combo of call back and "classy" :-)
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Gordon: Why don't you like me?
Marten: It's your enormity!
Why no, I don't think I'll stop any time soon. :evil:
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GORDON: "Got him! And that was my last quarter, too."
MARTEN: "The claaaaawwwwwwwwwww ... "
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Why no, I don't think I'll stop any time soon. :evil:
Dear god what have I doonnnneee. :psyduck:
Marten: TWUERGUFRGARETRSGHNEFSHBE!!!
Dr. Corrine: I don't understand! No matter what form I take, I always scare my patients! I mean, very first thing I tried was a nice, friendly Tapir, and Hannelore freaked right out and ran away screaming! What am I supposed to do?!
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Gordon: "Am I doing this wrong?"
Marten: "Doing what wrong?"
Matchmaker off-panel: "For the last time, Gordon, you're neither a headcrap nor a facehugger!"
(Yeah, I got nothing... my first thought was the talking hat thing from Harry Potter but someone already did that. Oo)
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Gordon: "Are you shaking? Do you want me to raise the room temperature or something?"
Marten: "Why did i have to play Metroid today...?"
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Gordon: "So, you want it spiky like before?"
Marten: "Yes, please, but not so much off the top this time?"
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Gordon: "Wow...Do you see that articulation seams? Why aren't you looking at them?"
Marten: "I'm trying to convince myselft that that's your ninth leg poking me..."
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GORDON: "I'm not going to be a Sorting Spiderbot forever, you know. I have this idea for an installation art piece ... "
MARTEN: "I will have given at the hair salon. Eventually."
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Gordon: Doctor, I have this growth on my butt...
Marten: (softly) that joke is sooooooooo old...
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Creeeeeeepy DSL is creepy.
Gordon: "I've ... seen things you people wouldn't believe. Hm... attack ships on fire off the shoulder of orion. I watched sea beams ... glitter in the dark near the Terhauser Gate. ... all those... moments will be lost ... in time. Like... tears ... in the rain. *long pause, heartfelt music* Time ... to die."
*Marten flies away*
Gordon: Doctor, I have this growth on my butt...
Marten: (softly) that joke is sooooooooo old...
Bwahahaha... now THAT is in keeping with this forums attitude!
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:psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck: :psyduck:
Well I would've gone with a Dora crossdressing/genderbending joke, but given as of late.....
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Gordon: "I've ... seen things you people wouldn't believe. Hm... attack ships on fire off the shoulder of orion. I watched sea beams ... glitter in the dark near the Terhauser Gate. ... all those... moments will be lost ... in time. Like... tears ... in the rain. *long pause, heartfelt music* Time ... to die."
That suggestion is just batty.
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Good batty or bat batty?
(Btw. that word - although the meaning is semi-clear - doesn't make the tiniest bit of sense to me in an etymology sorta way...)
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From, I believe, "Bats in the belfry", something that only happens when the belfry is unused...
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Gordon: "I've ... seen things you people wouldn't believe. Hm... attack ships on fire off the shoulder of orion. I watched sea beams ... glitter in the dark near the Terhauser Gate. ... all those... moments will be lost ... in time. Like... tears ... in the rain. *long pause, heartfelt music* Time ... to die."
That suggestion is just batty.
Alright, Soulsynger and Akima have teamed up to win the thread. Everybody can pack up and go home now.
(Blade Runner was a seriously boring movie, except for that scene.)
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F*ck... I only just got it. Akima, you're so win. Oo
(I don't remember names well...)
@WAYF:
I share your impression. But for me it was only the first. After my second time watching it it became one of my all-time favorites.
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Gordon: "I've ... seen things you people wouldn't believe. Hm... attack ships on fire off the shoulder of orion. I watched sea beams ... glitter in the dark near the Terhauser Gate. ... all those... moments will be lost ... in time. Like... tears ... in the rain. *long pause, heartfelt music* Time ... to die."
That suggestion is just batty.
Alright, Soulsynger and Akima have teamed up to win the thread. Everybody can pack up and go home now.
(Blade Runner was a seriously boring movie, except for that scene.)
I will concede the first so hard.
And strongly disagree with the second comment.
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Ah, to be fair, when I studied it, I was studying it alongside and in comparison with Mary Shelley's Frankenstein. So maybe that had something to do with it.
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Well, that's yer whole problem, right there - it was introduced to you by an academic.
:-D :-P
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Gordon: The tortured spirits of your ancestors cling to you, screaming in silence. Apparently they are quite numerous. Have you had that dream again? A black goat with seven eyes that watches from the outside.
Marten: (softly in terrified Donald Duck Voice) It is standing right behind you. Please don't move.
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GORDON: "I was born, with thousands of my spider sisters and brothers, when a drunken Mexican-Irish cactus exploded one day ... "
MARTEN: "Dude, wrong webcomic. Besides, snopes (http://www.snopes.com/horrors/insects/cactus.asp) says that's bullshit."
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Gordon: Coat: Check. Jaunty Beret: Check.
Marten: I don't think President Clinton is going to give you the reception you're expecting in that getup.
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Gordon: Coat: Check. Jaunty Beret: Check.
Marten: I don't think President Clinton is going to give you the reception you're expecting in that getup.
Gordon: That depends on what your definition of "is" is.
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Gordon: I do 4d6 poison damage to your bard character (http://www.topatoco.com/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TO&Product_Code=QC-DnD-PRINT&Category_Code=QC-ART) with my Drow character.
Marten: You.....you......killed him....
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Gordon: This is my magnum opus...
Marten: I don't remember Charlotte being quite so large
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Gordon: I do 4d6 poison damage to your bard character (http://www.topatoco.com/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TO&Product_Code=QC-DnD-PRINT&Category_Code=QC-ART) with my Drow character.
Marten: You.....you......killed him....
Gordon: "You're a little big to be a gobbo (http://www.google.ca/imgres?imgurl=http://www.coolminiornot.com/pics/pics12/img48275cb1998f7.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.coolminiornot.com/190212&usg=__3rWYSWG5ejDlUfuu1SFWwHEgxpQ=&h=275&w=600&sz=43&hl=en&start=25&zoom=1&tbnid=IJ2oFWYkC-LkTM:&tbnh=62&tbnw=135&ei=SR_LULLnOYHm2gWChID4Bg&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dgoblin%2Bgiant%2Bspider%2Brider%26start%3D20%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DN%26gbv%3D2%26tbm%3Disch&um=1&itbs=1)..."
Marten: "Spiders, why did it have to be spiders?"
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Gordon: The tortured spirits of your ancestors cling to you, screaming in silence. Apparently they are quite numerous. Have you had that dream again? A black goat with seven eyes that watches from the outside.
Marten: (softly in terrified Donald Duck Voice) It is standing right behind you. Please don't move.
Puzzle-Box of Yogg-Saron for the win.