THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

Fun Stuff => BAND => Topic started by: KharBevNor on 15 Dec 2005, 14:55

Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: KharBevNor on 15 Dec 2005, 14:55
Any other UK forumites absolutely tired of this insipid, over-played piece of pap? The music is soul-less, the lyrics are a load of crap full of awkard rhymes, the fucker can't sing anyway, it's played about every hour on the radio, and I PERSONALLY advance the opinion that Luke would not get bullied if he didn't go around telling people his fucking dad was Bruce Lee. He could also do with having his song sung by someone who doesn't make you want to smash your head through a plate glass window just to escape his a-tonal attempt at vocals.

AND YET IT'S TIPPED FOR THE CHRISTMAS #1!?

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

How can people even stand to listen to this shite? Let alone BUY it! Sorry, but I really must rant about this awful, awful song somewhere.

Once again, I shall quote my mother, for she is often right:

Quote from: KharBevNor's mother, on the topic of the JCB song,
This is dire.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Oli on 15 Dec 2005, 15:21
Well, I'm rumblin' in this JCB.
I'm 5 years old and my dad's a giant sitting beside me.
And the engine rattles my bum like berserk
While we're singin, 'Don't forget your shovel if you want to go to work!'

My dad's probably had a bloody hard day
But he's been good fun and bubblin and jokin' away
And the procession of cars stuck behind
are gettin all impatient and angry, but we dont mind.

An' we're holdin up the bypass
oh
Me and my dad havin a top laugh
oh woah

Sittin on the toolbox
oh
And I'm so glad I'm not in school, boss
So glad I'm not in school

Oh no...

And we pull over to let cars past
And pull off again, speedin by the summer green grass
And we're like giants up here in our big yellow digger
Like zoids, or transformers, or maybe even bigger

And I wanna transform into a Tyrannosaurus Rex!
And eat up all the bullies and the teachers and their pets
And I'll tell all my mates that my dad's B.A. Baracus
Only with a JCB and Bruce Lee's nunchuckas

And We're holdin up the bypass
Weh Oh
Me and my dad havin a top laugh
Weh Oh weh oh

Sittin on the toolbox
Weh Oh
And I'm so glad I'm not in school, boss
So glad I'm not in school

And we're holdin up the bypass
Weh Oh

Me and my dad havin a top laugh
Weh Oh
I'm sittin on the toolbox
Weh Oh

And I'm so glad I'm not in school, Boss
So glad I'm not in school

-

Said I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his JCB.
I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his JCB.
I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his JCB.
I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round

And we're holdin' up the bypass
Weh Oh

Me and my dad havin a top laugh
Weh Oh
And I'm sittin on the toolbox
oh

And I'm so glad I'm not in school, Boss
So glad I'm not in school

I said

I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his JCB.
I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his

Aw, I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his JCB.
I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his JCB.


FUCKING YASS! The song is CAH-WALITY! after we've been subjected to the crazy frog for months on end at least...
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: KharBevNor on 15 Dec 2005, 15:28
But he can't SING!
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Tomservo on 15 Dec 2005, 15:47
This is why I don't listen to the radio anymore
Title: Re: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: rive gauche on 15 Dec 2005, 22:01
Quote from: KharBevNor
...absolutely tired of this insipid, over-played piece of pap? The music is soul-less, the lyrics are a load of crap full of awkard rhymes, the fucker can't sing anyway, it's played about every hour on the radio.... How can people even stand to listen to this shite? Let alone BUY it! Sorry, but I really must rant about this awful, awful song somewhere.


Sounds like you're talking abut "My Humps" to me.
Title: Re: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: southern_dan on 15 Dec 2005, 23:23
Quote from: rive gauche
 Sounds like you're talking abut "My Humps" to me.


ohh yeah i know what chuuu talkin bout brother
Title: Re: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: surgerydrugsnrocknroll on 15 Dec 2005, 23:49
Quote from: southern_dan
Quote from: rive gauche
 Sounds like you're talking abut "My Humps" to me.


ohh yeah i know what chuuu talkin bout brother


my humps,
my humps,
my lovely lady lumps

i dunno, but to me, 'lovely lump' sounds like an oxymoron.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: eternie on 15 Dec 2005, 23:52
I haven't heard it.

Ah I love living my musical life through the internet and my mp3 player. I seriously haven't heard any recent songs through anything but friends/family for a year or so. It's wonderful.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: southern_dan on 15 Dec 2005, 23:53
i just listened to that jcb song, not being in the uk i havnt heard it yet, its absolute dribble i know exactlly what ur saying, its the biggest peice of S*** o have seen on the charts in a long time.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: ayePod on 16 Dec 2005, 02:17
I have actually seen Nizlopi twice and they are the nicest most down to earth guys. I have a particular spot in my heart for this song purely because it isn't the new Girls Aloud song. Talk about contrived shitty rhymes.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: loyalpeon on 16 Dec 2005, 03:36
I know exactly what you mean about living life through the net and your mp3 player eternie. It's the only way to go. However:

I heard this song about 6 months or so ago and, well... frankly... really, really liked it.

Here's the thing: I can understand someone hating it for being overplayed, and yes, I know it's everywhere on the radio nowadays and I'd probably get over it incredibly quickly if I actually listened to the radio.

But, leaving that to one side, this is just a FUN song and deserves better than it's receiving here at the moment, so I figured I'd put my cape and mask on and jump to its rescue. Come on people, the lyrics aren't bad for God's sake - I think he does a decent job of channeling his inner 5-year-old. Vocals, well, that's personal preferance.

Anyways, I'll get off my own soap-box now.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Thrillho on 16 Dec 2005, 04:48
I love this song. Meh.

I also love My Humps.

Probably because I want to fuck the chick singing it. Oh well.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Cpt.Fantastic on 16 Dec 2005, 11:26
I want to punch the JCB song in the ovaries.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: zmeiat_joro on 16 Dec 2005, 12:21
I heard the lady lumps song today. I am scarred.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: öde on 16 Dec 2005, 14:25
Quote

I'm Luke, I'm five, and my dad's Bruce Lee. Drives me round in his JCB.


I'm sorry but that just fucking rocks.

Anyway, I've never heard of the song until now, one of the benefits of being a hermit.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Mark7 on 16 Dec 2005, 14:39
It's also one of the benefits of never listening to the radio :D
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: slinkyindieninja on 16 Dec 2005, 15:12
I have never heard the JCB song.

However, I have heard snippets of My Humps.

Memoryremovalplz.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: KharBevNor on 16 Dec 2005, 15:17
Argh no

p;lease don't LIKE thje SONG!

THIS THREAD IS ONLY FOR HJATE
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Tinjessla on 16 Dec 2005, 16:52
Aw c'mon, it's not that bad! The videos pretty cute.




Although, it would get annoying if it was played over and over again...
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Sythe on 16 Dec 2005, 21:09
I must admit I have never heard the JCB song, but at the line And the engine rattles my bum like berzerk I lost all interest in my ramen.

I once punched a kid in the face for singing My Humps. That song grates on me like womens' underwear.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: 15goingon5 on 17 Dec 2005, 04:40
I don't listen to the radio for feer of hearing any of the manufactored pop shite so I hadn't heard it, however a friend bought it for me (christmass presant along with some singing socks). I looked at the cover, all i could think was manufactored crappy pop created from some dudes PC.

I listened to it anyway, I was surprised. OK i've only listened to it twice but it wasn't so bad. I would mind listening to it but it would be my preferance
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: iamtheaznman on 17 Dec 2005, 11:03
I l istened to a clip of it on iTunes (Cause the UK store is WAY better than the US) and it wasn't THAT bad. I don't really like the vocals, but it's got a nice tune.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Shaft on 19 Dec 2005, 04:38
Being a warwickshire lad, and being a local warwickshire band, and having seen them in the local pub a year ago, and then to have them outsell Madonna, Robbie Williams, Westlife and McFly, I think it's pretty neat. I also know Luke and John and they're nice guys.

Plus, they are fucking incredible live. The double bass and beatboxing makes it more similar to hip hop than folk. Rock on guys.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: trolley on 19 Dec 2005, 17:08
After hearing about this song for a good couple of months from EVERYONE, as well as it's atonal lyrics being repeated in my face, i finally heard this song yesterday.

It was awful. Bland, painful lyrics (bum should never be sung), cheesy, forgettable backing track to cheesy forgettable vocals. Absolutely piss poor.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Gryff on 19 Dec 2005, 17:21
Hasn't every UK Christmas single been fucking appalling since about… well… ever?
Title: Re: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: FaultyGluestick on 19 Dec 2005, 20:45
Quote from: surgerydrugsnrocknroll


my humps,
my humps,
my lovely lady lumps

i dunno, but to me, 'lovely lump' sounds like an oxymoron.


Yeah, I don't know why she's promoting breast cancer
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Luke C on 20 Dec 2005, 02:54
I somehow manage to avoid a lot of this crappy music (well...sound)

I only heard the Artic Monkeys on Saturday night. "Hi were Artic Monkeys, we copied Franz Ferdinand in every possible way except we took all the good stuff about them and burnt it and replaced it with our shite".

My humps I have heard about 3 times, about 4 times to many.

I intend on trying to avoid this song for as long as I can.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: elcapitan on 20 Dec 2005, 04:04
A girl I know referred to hers as "lady lumps" a few years ago, and they were certainly lovely. At the time I thought, "You know, that's kinda cute. I'll pay that."

Now, of course, the Black Eyed Peas have raped my memories. Fuck you, Black Eyed Peas! Fuck you and your appalling, degraded, commercialised, completely atonal attempt at hip-hop.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: slinkyindieninja on 20 Dec 2005, 09:13
I had to go to the hairdresser today and as I waited, "My Humps" was played on the radio station they were listening to.

What's the ear equivalent of castration? Because I wanted that done. It doesn't even sound like the woman has an individual voice anymore.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: thedevilissix on 20 Dec 2005, 12:11
Well, to put things in perspective, the UK Christmas No.1 is pretty much getting bought next week.  And not by Nizlopi.

(adopts Heather Graham in Scrubs pose) Peace out, homies! :)

Kate
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Thrillho on 20 Dec 2005, 14:16
Quote from: Luke C

I only heard the Artic Monkeys on Saturday night. "Hi were Artic Monkeys, we copied Franz Ferdinand in every possible way except we took all the good stuff about them and burnt it and replaced it with our shite".


What are you, a fucking moron? They're barely alike except for being indie.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: KharBevNor on 20 Dec 2005, 14:33
Arctic Monkeys are 'Bet You Look Good on the Dance Floor', right?

Much as a I try and avoid insipid crap, it does remind me of Franz Ferdinand.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Thrillho on 21 Dec 2005, 09:43
Quote from: tommydski
Quote from: DynamiteKid
What are you, a fucking moron? They're barely alike except for being indie.

i don't think it's necessary to brand this gentleman 'a fucking moron' for stating his opinion of a band, sportsfan. especially when he has written exactly the same thing as you in a different context. you clearly both rate franz ferdinand so you are in agreement.


How do you figure that?

And just for the record, Franz are pretty good, but somewhere in the year gap between their two albums I just stopped caring about them for some reason.

Quote
maybe the comparison to the arctic monkeys is not his own and he is parodying it. maybe he does hear a bit of the arctic monkeys. does it matter?

i am in disagreement with you regarding classification of the arctic monkeys and franz ferdinand's as 'indie' because both are on major record labels but i will not brand you 'a fucking moron'. we just differ on the matter.


I just knew someone was going to say that about them being on major labels. Only on this fucking board, I tell you.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Thrillho on 21 Dec 2005, 13:56
Quote from: tommydski
my objection isn't to be found within the context of your debate sportsfan. i just don't like people being branded as 'fucking morons' for such trivial reasons. it sounds like ass-kick talk.

let us have no more of this ass-kick talk. whole world now is full of ass-kick talk. ass-kick talk everywhere. but on this forum, please, no more ass-kick talk. not on this forum.


You know what, I'll gladly admit I flew off the handle - but in all fairness, this 'sportsfan' thing is incredibly patronising - probably deliberate and deserved I'll admit - but still patronising (to the extend that I'm going to steal it for my own ends), and that second paragraph of yours makes you look pretty stupid.

Besides, I couldn't 'kick' anyone's 'ass' if I tried, unless it was verbally.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: LordStanleyKnife on 21 Dec 2005, 15:37
To be fair I'd like to here you name a hald decent Christmas number 1.  Don't forget, it's the mainstream charts they are tipped for.

That being said.....I like the sentiment of the song.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Hector Gilbert on 23 Dec 2005, 21:26
Quote from: LordStanleyKnife
To be fair I'd like to here you name a hald decent Christmas number 1.  Don't forget, it's the mainstream charts they are tipped for.

That being said.....I like the sentiment of the song.


So do I.  I think it's a fun little number, though I'm not sure quite how I'd react to say an album's worth of stuff like that.  Also, I believe a good cover of "Mad World" hit number one in the UK a couple of years back.  So Christmas UK number one singles lately haven't been so bad, on that evidence.  Here's hoping that "JCB Song" makes it to number one.

And also, on the subject of Arctic Monkeys, the only thing that they'd have in common with Franz Ferdinand would be the fact that they're a commercially successful alternative rock band who made a reference to a "dance floor".  The music of the Arctic Monkeys is much harder, more punkish and delivered with a more believable panache than Franz Ferdinand's faux-arty aesthetic.  Give me a choice between any choice of Franz Ferdinand single and "I Bet You Look Good On The Dance Floor", and the Arctic Monkeys would win every time.  Though now plagued by the spectre of the Crazy Frog, this era of internet hype has opened new possibilities for the UK singles chart.
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: ASturge on 24 Dec 2005, 12:35
Quote from: ayePod
because it isn't the new Girls Aloud song. Talk about contrived shitty rhymes.


Here's the thing, Girls Aloud fucking rule.

Nizlopi do not I'm afraid...
Title: I really, really, really, really hate the JCB song.
Post by: Trollstormur on 24 Dec 2005, 13:27
Khar means business, so that means you're on notice, UK.