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Author Topic: Most distateful sexual innuendo...  (Read 24920 times)

ImRonBurgundy?

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Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« on: 19 Oct 2006, 18:16 »

...you've heard in a song?

It's probably a two-way tie for me.

"She had dumps like a truck, truck, truck" -Sisqo, "The Thong Song"

"But there's only one thing that fits me like it should" -Bryan Adams, "The Only Thing That Looks Good On Me is You"
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Will

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #1 on: 19 Oct 2006, 18:20 »

While great for comic relief, I find Fergie's attempts at innuendo rather horrible.  "My London Bridge wanna go down" and "My humps, my humps, my lovely lady lumps..."

WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?
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valley_parade

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #2 on: 19 Oct 2006, 18:35 »

Lemmy referring to his 'bacon torpedo' in "Eat The Rich".

I love Motorhead..but that's just filthy.
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Rubby

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #3 on: 19 Oct 2006, 18:56 »

I'd have to agree with 1010101(or whatever).
Fergie trys so hard, but man. It's sooooooo bad.
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nuisance

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #4 on: 19 Oct 2006, 19:16 »

The generally excellent (if highly uncomfortable) Infinite Livez and his "tune" White Wee Wee.

Seen a few favourable mentions of Kool Keith recently on here - please do yourselves a favour and try out this guy for size.

Also The Yeastie Girls' lyrics on the Consolidated track You Suck are pretty disgusting.  A pointed payback for the then popular raps requesting dick-sucking from bods like NWA.  "I know you think it's a real drag / To suck my cunt when I'm on the rag" will forever lurk in my subconscious.  Kinda like Peaches but 5+ years earlier.
« Last Edit: 19 Oct 2006, 19:22 by nuisance »
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thepugs

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #5 on: 19 Oct 2006, 19:31 »

Haha, I have to second the 'bacon torpedo.'  First time I heard that song I couldn't stop laughing.
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x_kristyn_x

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #6 on: 19 Oct 2006, 20:26 »

"Animals" by Nickelback was a different song for their style...
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David_Dovey

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #7 on: 19 Oct 2006, 21:58 »

Pretty much all of "Feed My Frankenstein" by Alice Cooper

Quote
Well, I ain't evil, I'm just good lookin'
Start a little fire, and baby start cookin'
I'm a hungry man
But I don't want pizza
I'll blow down your house
And then I'm gonna eat ya

Bring you to a simmer
Right on time
Run my greasy fingers
Up your greasy spine

[CHORUS]
Feed my Frankenstein
Meet my libido
He's a psycho
Feed my Frankenstein
Hungry for love
And it's feeding time

You don't want to talk
So baby shut up
And let me drink the wine from your fur tea cup
Velcro candy, sticky sweet
Make my tattoos melt in the heat
Well, I ain't no veggie
Like my flesh on the bone
Alive and lickin' on your ice cream cone

[CHORUS]
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BrittanyMarie

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #8 on: 19 Oct 2006, 22:20 »

"Let me stick my keys in your ignition babe" ALSO "And let me put this love van off in your trunk, babe"
R Kelly-Ignition
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Narr

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #9 on: 19 Oct 2006, 23:13 »

"Let me cut your cake with my knife" from AC/DC's "Let Me Put My Love Into You" is the only one that's jumping out at me at the moment.

FUNNIEST overtly sexual innudeno in a song that I listen to is probably the whole "squeeze my lemon until I fall right out of bed" thing in The Lemon Song.  I have no idea why I think it's as funny as it is.
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Storm Rider

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #10 on: 19 Oct 2006, 23:15 »

OOOOH

YOU TOUCH MY TRA LA LA
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BeoPuppy

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #11 on: 19 Oct 2006, 23:40 »

Warrant's Cherry Pie. Not so much for the lyrics, though they are bad enough (I mixed the batter and she licked the beater), but for the accompanying video where a girl falls and gets a slice of cherry pie in her lap just so. It was horribly embarressing when it first came out and it has not been able to mature gracefully.






http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skSNi71WqhM&mode=related&search=

Check this out. This is the writer of that song talking about it. He has issues.
« Last Edit: 19 Oct 2006, 23:42 by BeoPuppy »
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Trollstormur

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #12 on: 19 Oct 2006, 23:53 »

sorry guys, the Pornogrind genre beats everything in this thread. I don't have any specifics, but if you can find any of the lyrics from the band Whore, you'll see what I'm talking about.
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also israel

Scytale

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #13 on: 20 Oct 2006, 00:27 »

Nattefrost wins this so hard...

"My cold goddess of the night
Squirming under my spiked fist
She's giving me all carnal delights
Submit yourself and drink my blood"

That cracks me up everytime I hear it...

or there's

"Whores of Hell fell the whip
Sluts of Hell with blood red lips
Leather and Latex I demand
Shut up bitch, I am in command !!!!"



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Ravenbomb

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #14 on: 20 Oct 2006, 00:38 »

pretty much all of "Sex Farm" and "Big Bottoms" by Spinal Tap
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muffy

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #15 on: 20 Oct 2006, 02:02 »

So far, Kunt and The Gang win, with an album called 'I have a little w*nk and then I have a little cry',
and such beautiful songs as 'Carol Vorderman' (it was the only clean song title I could find on it, with the immortal lines - ?Carol?s really glamorous/she wears the latest stuff/she?s fit for fortysomething and I want to doik her muff?.

Never heard the word 'doik' before.
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Patrick

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #16 on: 20 Oct 2006, 02:35 »

FUNNIEST overtly sexual innudeno in a song that I listen to is probably the whole "squeeze my lemon until I fall right out of bed" thing in The Lemon Song.  I have no idea why I think it's as funny as it is.

Robert Johnson lines in Zeppelin songs ftw! It's even better in "Travelling Riverside Blues," because it uses the entire "Squeeze my lemon 'til the juice runs down my leg" line.
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QuarterFire

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #17 on: 20 Oct 2006, 03:53 »

No on'es mentioned 'Candyshop' by that guy I don't care to remember?
Or 'Big Balls' by AC/DC? I'm ashamed.
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a pack of wolves

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #18 on: 20 Oct 2006, 04:18 »

"Let me stick my keys in your ignition babe" ALSO "And let me put this love van off in your trunk, babe"
R Kelly-Ignition

Ignition is a work of genius, and proves that R Kelly ought to have been a writer for the Carry On films.
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Kyros

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #19 on: 20 Oct 2006, 05:34 »

"Pink tracterbeam into your incision" from an Incubus song called "Here In My Room"

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #20 on: 20 Oct 2006, 08:01 »

"You have a lock and I have a key
Lie back and let me unlock you."

From a Nick Cave song. I think it's Cannibal's Hymn. Actually, that's not really that bad. As far as innuendo, there's a bit in 'Babe, You Turn Me On' where he goes from lazy metaphor to blatant within one line - 'I put one hand on your round right heart, and the other down your panties.'
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Lines

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #21 on: 20 Oct 2006, 08:06 »

No on'es mentioned 'Candyshop' by that guy I don't care to remember?

yes. i hate that song so much.

thought i think chuck berry's My Ding-a-Ling. at first it seems like it's a bell, but later on, i don't think so.
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amok

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #22 on: 20 Oct 2006, 08:20 »

'Stinkfist' by Tool.

Something has to change
Un-deniable dilemma
Boredom's not a burden
Anyone should bear
Constant over stimulation numbs me
But I would not want you
Any other way
It's not enough
I need more
Nothing seems to satisfy
I don't want it
I just need it
To breathe, to feel, to know I'm alive
Finger deep within the borderline
Show me that you love me and that we belong together
Relax, turn around and take my hand
I can help you change
Tired moments into pleasure
Say the word and we'll be
Well upon our way
Blend and balance
Pain and comfort
Deep within you
Till you will not want me any other way
It's not enough
I need more
Nothing seems to satisfy
I don't want it
I just need it
To feel, to breathe, to know I'm alive
Knuckle deep inside the borderline
This may hurt a little, but it's something you'll get used to
Relax...slip away
Something kinda sad about
The way that things have come to be
Desensitized to everything
What became of subtlety?
How can it mean anything to me
If I really don't feel anything at all?
I'll keep digging till
I feel something
Elbow deep inside the borderline
Show me that you love me and that we belong together
Shoulder deep within the borderline
Relax...turn around and take my hand.


Elbow-deep? Ugh.

Inlander

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #23 on: 20 Oct 2006, 08:32 »

"You have a lock and I have a key
Lie back and let me unlock you."

See, now that's just lazy songwriting.? The first sexual metaphor any schoolboy thinks of is "lock and key".  NICK CAVE C- MUST TRY HARDER.
« Last Edit: 20 Oct 2006, 08:56 by Inlander »
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elcapitan

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #24 on: 20 Oct 2006, 08:44 »

For Nick Cave innuendo, I'm a fan of one of the lines in Nature Boy (also one of my favourite Nick Cave stanzas, full stop):

You took me back to your place and dressed me up in a deep-sea diver's suit,
You played the Patriot, you raised the flag, and I stood at full salute,
Then later on we smoked a pipe, it struck me dumb, made it impossible to speak,
As she closed in slow motion, quoting Sappho in the original Greek...


It could not even be innuendo, but that's how I've always heard it.

EDIT: It's not even distasteful. Sue me.
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TrueNeutral

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #25 on: 20 Oct 2006, 10:36 »

"Animals" by Nickelback was a different song for their style...

Not really, aren't like all Chad Kroegers song about statuatory rape?
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chamberk

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #26 on: 20 Oct 2006, 10:43 »

in YOUR end-o.
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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #27 on: 20 Oct 2006, 10:56 »

sorry guys, the Pornogrind genre beats everything in this thread. I don't have any specifics, but if you can find any of the lyrics from the band Whore, you'll see what I'm talking about.

Yeah, but it's a different thing really isn't it? Same with Nattefrost...we're talking about sexual innuendo, and there's precious little
of that in a song called, for example, 'Spank Me, Fuck Me, Fill Me'. I mean, seriously.

I'm personally going to contribute Lordi - Fire in the Hole and Bruce Dickinson - Dive, Dive, Dive

Lordi - Fire in the Hole

She's a thorn - like a spike
but i just cannot brush her aside
she holds her hands up high - with quiver in fingers

watch her cringe - afraid of my might
strapped down in a chair-
blinded by the headlights
she might feel a bit scarified - it's the ultimate stinger

so-
lets skip the limbo and cut to the chase
let's light up your wire

Fire in the hole
I gotta blow you up inside baby
fire in the hole
i'm gonna make you my blazing lady
fire in the hole

theres a sound - i dont like
pounding at the door when
i'm pumped up and psyched
so few could understand the way that i show my lovin'

hold it back - for a while
we have to getr the timing just right
gotta let the -OH!-
gate-crashers in just when we're starting to crackle

so burn with me baby
let's blow up the night
lighting up the wire

fire in the hole
the fuse is lit and we're ready to go
fire in the hole
locked and loaded and about to blow


Bruce Dickinson - Dive! Dive! Dive!

Put and opening shot. Across your bows.
Got tunnel vision. Pull the sheets in now.
Let'em flap. Let'em rip.
This man of war gonna sink your ship.
Gonna blow you midships.
Gonna dive tonight.
There's no release when your deep down inside.

Davey Jones gonna keep your bones.
No monkey buisness. Now your on your own.
Turn your stern and cover me.
We're rolling swell. Just an old sea dog like me.
Gonna blow you midships.
Gonna dive tonight.
There's no release till your deep down inside.

[CHORUS:]

Dive! Dive! Dive!
Dive! Dive! Dive!
Dive! Dive! Dive!
No muff too tuff.
We dive at five.

Seamen Staines is down below.
Torpedoes loaded. He's ready to go.
Wait to discharge. Waiting to release.
I see where the bones came up from below.
Gonna blow you midships.
Gonna dive tonight.
There's no release till your deep down inside.

[CHORUS.]
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thepugs

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #28 on: 20 Oct 2006, 11:23 »

Heehee, Lordi.
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TrueNeutral

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #29 on: 20 Oct 2006, 11:26 »

Oh god that Bruce Dickinson song is absolute GOLD.
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valley_parade

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #30 on: 20 Oct 2006, 13:00 »

Well of course it is. Dude puts his pants on one leg at a time, but then he makes gold records.
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Thrillho

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #31 on: 20 Oct 2006, 17:12 »

"You have a lock and I have a key
Lie back and let me unlock you."

See, now that's just lazy songwriting.? The first sexual metaphor any schoolboy thinks of is "lock and key".? NICK CAVE C- MUST TRY HARDER.

It's a weak example of one of the best lyricists of our time, really. 'Nature Boy' is from the same album, and it has some of his finest lyrics. It's tricky to find some Cave for this thread because most of his innuendo is pretty subtle and tasteful...besides he spends more time murdering than shagging in his lyrics.
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Felix_

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #32 on: 21 Oct 2006, 04:36 »

"You have a lock and I have a key
Lie back and let me unlock you."

See, now that's just lazy songwriting.? The first sexual metaphor any schoolboy thinks of is "lock and key".? NICK CAVE C- MUST TRY HARDER.

It's a weak example of one of the best lyricists of our time, really. 'Nature Boy' is from the same album, and it has some of his finest lyrics. It's tricky to find some Cave for this thread because most of his innuendo is pretty subtle and tasteful...besides he spends more time murdering than shagging in his lyrics.

Well said.

Cave is God.

On another note, this is one of the worst sexual innuendo's lyrically that I've heard from one of the worst bands that I've heard as well. Prepare to cringe.

Bulletboys - "Smooth Up In Ya"


Smooth up in ya

Mom
Whoa

I know you really want to move me
You know I like to see you try
I've said it before and I'll say it again
You're not not trapped if you don't let me in

Looks like you're the hard kind
I ain't got that kind of time

Oh I send shivers

Smooth up in ya
Smooth up in ya
(In ya)

You say I'm never gonna break ya
But we won't know until we try
So now's the time to make up your mind
I'll never ever be the one woman kind

Don't let your lovin' go to waste
All it takes is just one date

Oh I send shivers

Smooth up in ya
Smooth up in ya
(Smooth up in ya)

Smooth up in ya
(I wanna go, I wanna go)
Smooth up in ya
(Right now, yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah)

Oh oh oh
I wanna go
I wanna
I wanna go

Oh yeah yeah yeah, don't let your lovin' go to waste
Oh honey child, I'm gonna give you a taste

Whoa I send shivers

Smooth up in ya
Smooth up in ya
(Smooth up in ya)

Smooth up in ya
Smooth up in ya
(Said it before and I'll say it again)

Smooth up in ya
(Whoa)
Smooth up in ya
(Whoa I really wanna go)

Smooth up in ya
Smooth up in ya
(I really wanna go)

Smooth up in ya
Smooth up in ya
(Yeah, yeah)

Smooth up in ya
Smooth up in ya

*vomit*.

« Last Edit: 21 Oct 2006, 04:40 by Felix_ »
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The Eyeball Kid

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #33 on: 21 Oct 2006, 08:03 »

"She said kisses are nice but I'm looking for hills to ride"

Not too horrible, but who expects sexual innuendo in an Architecture in Helsinki song?

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #34 on: 21 Oct 2006, 08:37 »

There's also a Death Cab song ("Death Of An Interior Decorator") that refers to giving birth as "storming through the turnstiles".
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muffy

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #35 on: 21 Oct 2006, 08:50 »

Bright Eyes - A poetic Retelling of an Unfortunate Seduction

"And you tremble like a frightened bird
As she closes in and captures you to place you
In a silver cage deep within her poisoned womb
So once you?re safe inside, she might let you out
To fly in circles around the room
But its always night and there is no moon"

That seems like a suitably distasteful way to describe getting one's end away.
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Cartilage Head

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #36 on: 21 Oct 2006, 09:19 »

ALL I WANNA DO
IS ZOOM-A-ZOOM ZOOM
IN YA BOOM-BOOM...

SHAKE YA RUMP.
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gargoylekitty

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #37 on: 22 Oct 2006, 18:20 »

OOOOH

YOU TOUCH MY TRA LA LA

Yes, exactly.
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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #38 on: 22 Oct 2006, 19:13 »

Not really distasteful, but the dumbest...two words: "la la."

As for most distasteful, I'd have to go with pretty much the entire first verse of I Touch Myself.

EDIT - I think I just found the single most WRONG video on YouTube.
« Last Edit: 22 Oct 2006, 19:19 by Near Lurker »
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öde

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #39 on: 22 Oct 2006, 19:59 »

OOOOH

YOU TOUCH MY TRA LA LA

OOOOH

MY DING DING DONG
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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #40 on: 22 Oct 2006, 21:15 »

I would have to go with Zach Galifinakis' "Come on Get It (Up in 'Dem Guts)

I cant post the entire lyrics, but here are some of the high points:

"Forgot my watch
But it doesn?t matter
Cuz I?m stayin? out all night
Gonna spray my ?Baby Batter? "


"
Clarise:
I got to blow my nose!

Finger:
You what?

Clarise:
I gotta blow my nose!

Finger:
You what?

Clarise:
I said, I?m all congested up in here baby!
I got to blow my nose!

-sung-

Finger:
Well, you blow your nose
As soon as I?m done
Gettin? up in ?dem guts
Gettin? up in ?dem guts "
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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #41 on: 23 Oct 2006, 16:48 »

Dead or Alive - You Spin Me Round
Dont belive me?
NSFW
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Anna Banana

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #42 on: 23 Oct 2006, 18:38 »

Deep inside the garden of Eden
Standing there with my hard on bleedin'
Theres a devil in my dick and some demons in my semen
Good God no that would be treason
Believe me Eve she gave good reason
Botty looking too good not to be squeezin'
Creamy beaver hotter than a fever
I'm a givin' 'cause she's the reciever
I won't and I don't hang up until I please her
Makin' her feel like an over achiever
I take it away for a minute just to tease her
Then I give it back a little bit deeper

Sir Psycho Sir Psycho yea he's the man that I met 1 time
Sir Psycho Sir Psycho yea he's the man that left me blind
Sir Psycho Sir Psycho yea he's the man he's the man he's the man

He's a freak of nature
But we love him so
He's a freak of nature
But we let him go

I got stopped by a lady cop
In my automobile
She said get out and spead your legs
And then she tried to cop a feel
That cop she was all dressed in blue
Was she pretty? Boy I'm tellin' you
She stuck my butt with her big black stick
I said "what's up?" now suck my dick
Like a ram getting ready to jam the lamb
She whimpered just a little when she felt my hand
On her crotch so very warm
I could feel her getting wet through her uniform
Proppin' her up on the black and white
Unzipped and slipped "ooo that's tight"
I swatted her like no swat team can
Turned a cherry pie right into jam


Hello young woman that I love
Pretty punk rock mamma that I'm thinking of
Hold me naked if you will
In your arms in your legs in your pussy I'd kill
To be with you, to kiss with you, I do miss you
I love you

Lay me down ....
Descending waves of graceful pleasure
For your love there is no measure
Her curves they bend with subtle splendor

Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray the funk will make me freak
If I should die before I waked
Allow me Lord to rock out naked
Bored by the ordinary time to take a trip
Calling up a little girl with a bull whip
Lickety split go snap "snap"
Girl gettin' off all in my lap
The tallest tree the sweetest sap
Blowin' my ass right off the map
Ooo and it's nice out here
I think I'll stay for a while

sir psycho sexy-red hot chili peppers

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elcapitan

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #43 on: 23 Oct 2006, 18:40 »

Dead or Alive - You Spin Me Round
Dont belive me?
NSFW

Jeez, I'd hate to be a dick.
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est

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #44 on: 23 Oct 2006, 19:57 »

Man, half of this isn't actually innuendo, but straight up other names for sex.  Innuendo is an insinuation, not just saying "I'm gonna stick my come-cannon into your baby-basket"

Also, I always thought the vulgarity in Stinkfist was a metaphor for something else.  Something like a person/people/society becoming numb to things that used to shock the previous generation.
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AlexAttack

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #45 on: 23 Oct 2006, 20:11 »

i'd like to shock your previous generation......if you know what i mean.......heh heh heh
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ImRonBurgundy?

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #46 on: 24 Oct 2006, 00:08 »

SUCK MY KISS!!

What does that even mean??
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strawberry_gashes

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #47 on: 24 Oct 2006, 04:44 »

How about the entirety of "Closer?"
Not to even mention the music video...
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Near Lurker

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #48 on: 24 Oct 2006, 04:51 »

Actually, maybe I should elaborate.

"I love myself; I want you to love me.
When I feel down, I want you above me.
I search myself; I want you to find me.
I forget myself; I want you to remind me."

Later,

"You're the one who makes me come running.
You're the sun who makes me shine (these lines wouldn't be so bad on their own, but...oy)."
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David_Dovey

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Re: Most distateful sexual innuendo...
« Reply #49 on: 24 Oct 2006, 08:21 »

How about the entirety of "Closer?"
Not to even mention the music video...

See est's post above

in‧nu‧en‧do  /ˌɪnyuˈɛndoʊ/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[in-yoo-en-doh] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
?noun, plural -dos, -does.
1.   an indirect intimation about a person or thing, esp. of a disparaging or a derogatory nature.

I don't think saying "I want to fuck you like an animal" is really insinuating, so much as beating you about the head.

Also, yes Stinkfist is using anal fisting as a metaphor for people's desensitisation, these lines give it away...

Something kinda sad about
The way that things have come to be
Desensitized to everything
What became of subtlety?
How can it mean anything to me
If I really don't feel anything at all?
« Last Edit: 24 Oct 2006, 08:24 by David_Dovey »
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It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.
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