Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[schimmy]

What you're all ignoring is the very important fact that last night I got drunk and lost my virginity.
It is the single most hideously challenging thing I've ever done.

[Boro_Bandito]

Congratulations and god damnit you beat me to it! Seems like a lot more will at this point.

[Chrasstor]

Man, I just know I'm going to end up being a virgin until College. I'm way too timid D:

[ampersandwitch]

Guys hey hey you're posting in the wrong thread. 
1. Get a blog.
2. You must be sober if you're coherent enough to put together thoughts involving the future and perhaps goals that you're not reaching.
4. LOSL SOO O DRNKU

[mberan42]

Man, I just know I'm going to end up being a virgin until College. I'm way too timid D:

So? Big deal.

[Chrasstor]

I bet that 40% of the time, people were falsely claiming intoxicated.

lewk its ths ez kuz evrybudi knoez tha beeer mex u spell bad!!!!!

When I drink, I can spell pretty much normally... Only, I'm a lot more random, and I'll sometimes mess up homonyms.

Also, I need to get laid so I can be one of the cool kids. Dur~

[öde]

I'm so not sober I can only feel the pain of loneliness.

Slapping myself round the face (and not feeling it) and typing correctly are my only two joys at the moment.

[Boro_Bandito]

I wasn't actually feeling sorry for myself, that was as heartfelt a congrats as I give people. And besides, what are you gonna do? Throw up on me? pah!

Please don't, I like this shirt.

[Liz]

Also, I need to get laid so I can be one of the cool kids. Dur~

The word on the street is that having over 2000 posts helps you get laid. So get posting.

[Boro_Bandito]

That's a sure way to get him killed round these parts


Keep postin'!

[Liz]

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......

[Boro_Bandito]

fixed

[Liz]

Thank you sir.

[I is Grammar]

I'm in the process of downing my 5th rum and coke.  This night got much more interesing about 2 hours ago. 

[Runs_With_Scissors]

Also, I need to get laid so I can be one of the cool kids. Dur~

I'm cool....no, wait, I'm not. DAMN YOU FOR BEING RIGHT! Oh, and another thing to not do. NEVER MIX TEQUILA WITH MOUNTAIN DEW! Oh dear god that sucked... though Triple Sec and Pepsi are going to go ok it seems...

Modified: It seems we have run out of Triple Sec. I'm stuck with 40 % alcohol and 16 %. Yay...

[Eris]

Surely Triple Sec would taste funny with pepsi, as it's an orange liqueur? Rum and bourbon (vodka if you want) are generally had with cola, but I have never heard of having triple sec with it.

[Runs_With_Scissors]

It tastes ok surprisingly. But I'm just special... Orange and cola taste kinda ok. The stuff I'm having with cola right now is not ok, but at least it's not straight. Blah... tomorrow is going to suck...

[ampersandwitch]

Hey guys it's totally a fulfilling thing to have sex before you are ready and for the reason of ticking off the box rather than for emotional reasons
That sort of thoughtfulness is what actually makes you a cool kid.

[3Z3VH]

What you're all ignoring is the very important fact that last night I got drunk and lost my virginity.
It is the single most hideously challenging thing I've ever done.

At this point you should be happy you could get it up at all while drunk.

[Patrick]

I started drinking at 7:30 this morning. Single-malt Scotch should never need to conform to any social bounds.

I just downed another shot of that shit and it was a holy feeling. This will be a lovely next two hours.

Edit: Oh, sorry about the thread bump, but it's such a great thread that it really does deserve it.

[Boro_Bandito]

he's at the utopic "I love you guys" stage of drunkeness it seems

[calenlass]

Tomorrow night, guys.


Tomorrow night there will be bourbon.

[David_Dovey]

Tomorrow night I'm going to an 18th birthday party (I'm 21) most likely full of Catholic school kids, and I'm going to teach them how to get drunk.

Or discourage them from going near booze ever again. We'll see.

[ViolentDove]

Uh, yeah, kinda drunk, goddamn bar tab free thing, stupid bands. Also, gin and tonic + icecream = G&t spiders, surprisngly good, who would've known? Certainly not me. Also the fact that I got home and remembered to post here kind of wierds me out, that is all. Huzazah?

[Boro_Bandito]

Tonight, after work, there will be more drunken debauchery. I am sponsoring the house mixed drink tonight, which I'm betting is going ot end up being sour apple shooters. I love not having work on Saturdays.

[pen]

octoberfest + karaoke bar = good times to be had!  wheeeeee!!

[calenlass]

guys unosuke does not like whiskey what do i doooooooooooo

[Patrick]

There was an Oktoberfest party at the Birra Tirana brewery, which, incidentally, is about 10 blocks from my house.

I may never leave this city.

[ampersandwitch]

I am a little tipsy right now, because Scary Finnish Guy (tm) tried to get me drunk because that makes me "funny."
I did drink the drink my friend got me, but I gave the one he gave me away.
I'm sitting here playing Balloon Duel in my tipsiness.
Other drunken highlights involve drawing a Weirdo With a Beardo (pics l8er, fellows).

[Darkbluerabbit]

I am very close to finishing a bottle of wine (fuck you all, I weight 110 lbs so I am allowed to have no tolerance!) and I am glad to finally be able to post in this thread.  I've always looked at it, and thought, well damn, I'm sober...and the internet is making me feel bad about it.

I am quite smashed, but I used to be an English major so typing properly is my drunken compulsion.  You know how everyone has kind of a thing...some people get drunk and start cleaning (okay I do this too), others get drunk and start apologizing to everyone for everything, I get drunk and I become even more anal retentive about words.  It helps that I downloaded the Firefox extension that does auto spellcheck like MS word and I get a red squiggly line taunting me any time I make a mistake!  But seriously, I've had IM conversations that I'm too drunk to remember, but when I check my cache in the morning to see what we talked about, I could still type.  What I'm saying is that, just because people can spell words doesn't mean they're sober, so stop calling people fakers, a'ight? 

If I knew how, I would totally be tempted to post a video demonstrating why people who drink should not have webcams.  The other night I got home, just sober enough to change into pajamas, and then decided while drinking more, it would be a good idea to record myself dancing to a live recording of "Love Rhymes With Hideous Car Wreck."  I look like Mick Jagger.  It's pretty amazing. 

Okay but seriously, that live recording from the single kicks FUCKING ASS.  I love Johnny Whitney's voice when he's not trying to sound like a tortured child. 

P.S. This is my new favorite thread.

P.P.S. I am noticing that most of my posts, and my avatar, would lead people to believe that I am an alcoholic.  This is not the case I swear.

P.P.P.S. Or is it?  MARTY?  DO I HAVE ALCOHOLIC'S INGENUITY? 

[Hat]

Guys, I have to get drunk to make sure I'm sick enough to get a doctors certificate for thursday.

It is so important I be drunk right now

God it is hard to drink whiskey when you're coughing constantly, but I persevere!

P.S. Darkbluerabbit, I get the same way with words when I'm loaded as well. Basically I keep thinking that if Hemmingway could be shitfaced and write, I can at least give it a damn try.

[calenlass]

Doesn't whiskey generally help get rid of coughs?

[ruyi]

tell unosuke that i think whiskey is very enjoyable!

if a little girl on the internet says it it must be true.

[Patrick]

Guys I have about 6oz of 190-proof raki in a glass right next to my right hand. Give me about 10 minutes and I'll be smashed out of my fucking mind.

...this does not bode well.

[SeanBateman]

Guys you know what is really fun?

Cocaine.

Cocaine is really fun.

[Mnementh]

I bought a handle of VAT 69 this evening.  I am working my way through my second flask full of it.  I have not had dinner yet.  I probably should.

[Darkbluerabbit]

I am not entirely sober.  I have a case of sleep madness (I wonder if it is contagious through this comic) so I popped a few Tylenol PMs in hopes of knocking myself out.  That was a good hour ago, and I don't feel sleepy, just silly.  Really, everything is funny right now.  Webcomics are perrfect for this.  Pretend I am talking to a cat.  That's why I use perrrfect.

[Chrasstor]

Oh man, I got high yesterday for my first time. I took 7-8 bong tokes from some outdoor shit and started tripping out pretty bad. I was in my friend's basement who's grandparents are both really slow and gullible... I got really fucking paranoid and every creak I heard sent me looking everywhere around the room, which seemed like a box at the time, although it's not even a cube-shaped room.. When I moved it felt like there was a strobe light on and my body was moving with it;I could hear/feel my heart beating at all times. At one point I honestly thought I heard his grandmother right by the door(seemed like a door, though it was actually just a tarp covering the doorway) screaming at us. I left at 6PM and when I was walking home I was moving so slow that it felt like 3 hours before I made it to main street, and when I was moving, I kept forgetting where I was. Everything looked different, like it was my first time in the town. I went to this forest and thought that I could jump super far(I'm thinking an effect of the pot), so I tested it out by trying to jump from one side of a ditch that led into a brook to the other. I landed face-first in the brook.

By the time I got home I was so disoriented/tired that I just made a bunch of food, ate it all and talked on MSN a bit. Went to bed a hair short of 9 PM.... Woke up at 4 and made some more food, fell asleep again at 5 until 7:30.

It was an interesting experience that I do not regret, that said, I don't think pot is my thing.

EDIT: I forgot to mention how crazy music was. Stars made me super depressed to the point that I almost cried, while Sunset Rubdown sounded so sanguine...That is until that Colt Stands Up, Grows Horns song, at which point I started tripping out hardcore and thought I heard police-sirens and got freaked the fuck out. Thereupon I put my Mp3 Player away until I returned home.

[SeanBateman]

I have trouble believing that actually happened from smoking marijuana.

[Boro_Bandito]

Yeah, all that happened the first time I actually got high was that I sat in my basement with my brother and his friends for an hour, going from room to room and intermittingly saying "Let's play some Mario Kart." Never got around to it. I also remember how I could feel the blood in my face swishing back and forth, so what he's describing is possible, especially since he says he took 7 tokes from a bong.

The first time you get high you're body isn't used to it at all, and so you can really feel fucked up. You get a horrible case of drymouth and a lot of my friends said they started licking their lips constantly, though I don't remember doing it myself. With keeping that in mind you're short term memory is completely shot for several hours so you can forget entirely where you are if you're not careful, and the entire experience can feel really dreamlike. Afterwards when you build up some tolerance to it you're just a mellow high with some easy laughter and munchies, but the first time is no small thing.

[Patrick]

My first time was BATSHIT, dude. I was with a friend in his truck and he whipped out the bong and we talked politics (we solved ALL the world's problems). Then he dropped me off at my house, the both of us totally napalmed by this point (I'm talking like 12 hits of some "pretty fucking intense" stuff, by an experienced pothead's standards). I accidentally left my work hat and my CD player (incl. James Taylor's greatest hits) in his truck, but I was so whacked out I didn't care.

I stoner-sauntered into the kitchen and grabbed some Froot Loops and proceeded to knock down 5 bowls of that shit before I stopped being hungry and started being sleepy.

When I woke up in the morning I was *still* high, and it lasted up until 5pm that night, by which point I'd already been working 5 hours. Oh yeah, midshift was never better.

[SeanBateman]

Yeah, but neither of those experiences lead me to believe his story, which sounds more like a mushroom trip than being stoned.

Also, "Tokes?" Really? Is this the 60's?

[Boro_Bandito]

To a stoner, every year is somewhere in that decade, yes.

[Darkbluerabbit]

Chrasstor, how much do you trust your friend, and how much does he trust his "guy?"  Because it sounds like that weed might've been laced with something.  It happens.  I know, your first time is usually pretty intense, but pot isn't really a hallucinogen.  It can alter your perceptions of things, but only to a certain extent. 

And why is it that potheads can't seem to get over the 60's?  I understand the aging hippies, but people who were born in the 80's?  I don't get it.

[onewheelwizzard]

I don't know, weed has had some pretty hallucinogenic properties for me at various points in the past ... but then, the psychedelic state of mind is one that I visit pretty often, so I might be more receptive to such things.

Chrasstor, you probably smoked a pretty absurd amount.  7 bong rips of "outdoor" (a distinction I've only ever heard applied to very high quality stuff) is probably enough to do some pretty weird things to you if you don't know what to expect.  What happened to you sounds about right for what you smoked.

[SeanBateman]

No, it isn't.

[Stryc9Fuego]

I am so glad I stopped doing pot. it's nice being able to remember things again. Also, some of the most terrible things sounded like really great ideas. trying to build a pipe into a Playstation controller was about the worst of 'em ("C'mon, man, you can game and smoke at the same time!" until you put your thumb in the scalding hot bowl. I still have scars...). Also, month-old bong water is about the worst thing to spill anywhere. I'm still finding old clothes with that stench.

I used to yarp every time I smoked up. A friend of mine thought I was crazy when I said this, but I shut him up by asking why his GF takes the dishes out of the sink every time I come over. Of course, the fact that we'd also occasionally drop acid and get drunk might have something to do with it.

That first one sounds like laced weed, though. I'd say 'shrooms, man.

[öde]

The first time I had super skunk was the second time I'd smoked weed and I thought the moon was strangling me.

[Chrasstor]

I don't care who believes me, I'm just explaining what I felt like as best I can.

My first 4 hits were of the outdoor shit, then my friend's buddy came over with some other stuff that was darker green and mintier smelling and the rest of my tokes were from that. The guy that showed up with the dark green stuff wasn't really a good friend of Jay's(my friend), and I'm pretty sure he can't be trusted... But, he did take a toke of his stuff before he left. His initial reason for coming was to sell something to Jay, I think(though I can't remember what).

 I was tired and felt sick to begin with, and all of which I said was 100% true to my memory. When I was walking around in an open space I'd get disoriented and not know which way is which and stuff. I was looking around for this hose by a graveyard at one point for what felt like 10-20minutes. Nothing changed colour or anything unordinary like that, I basically just got uber paranoid and claustrophobic. When I meant that every creak sent me over the edge, I meant that every creak that came from upstairs. I even felt like the chair I was sitting on was part of me... I started talking about how I couldn't really see my friends, but just saw their persona... I also recall saying something about how I was seeing with my mind...

 Later, I was listening to "Colt Stands up, Grows Horns" and I guess a part of it mid-way through sounded like sirens to me at the time and I got frightened and turned off my mp3. It was seriously hard for me to walk at the climax of my high as my body felt super twitchy. I remember my friends kept asking me if I was alright and I would reply stuff like, "I'm just chilling..." or "I'm really high man, hahaha...". When I got home, I couldn't even get the toaster to work. Whether this was because of my being high, or the toaster actually being broken I'm not sure. I'm sure if I hadn't been high I would've been able to think more clearly and figured out how to fix it.

There was nothing like in television shows, with flashy colours and weird faces or whatever...
I'm just taking this all as a "Your body can't handle marijuana very well".

EDIT: Toke is still a widely popular word amongst stoners, at least around here. I RARELY hear anybody refer to it as a 'hit'. I mean, I understand that you just want something to bitch about(you always do), but at least think of something more plausible(like the poor unity of my paragraphs/sentences).

[onewheelwizzard]

That 70's Show is a lot of things, but an accurate portrayal of what being stoned is like is not one of them.

Kieffer, I've hung out with plenty of people who have been high enough to have things happen to them the way they did for Chrasstor.  If you don't know what you're in for, you really buy into things a lot more.  You think about and react to stuff that you'd ignore if you were more familiar with the drug.  Obviously it only happens once or twice for most people, but some people I know react REALLY strongly to smoking even very small amounts.

Chrasstor, do not expect smoking weed to do things like that to you all the time.  If you smoke again in the future, expect to be a good bit more on top of yourself.  Weed doesn't actually do that kind of stuff to you unless you're caught completely off guard by it (or you're intentionally trying to do it).