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[Jovan]

... you don't want to work. Piece of shit computer.

Basically, the monitor says, "Please check signal" and the keyboard doesn't light up either. Add to that, both the orange and green lights are on all the time on the tower. Pressing the reset or power button seems to do nothing. Strangely, the monitor did flicker on to the BIOS screen for about a second when I tried restarting it later. Checked all the connections, inside and out. Everything's in place. There was no power outage or anything, and my shit was all turned off while I was away.

Oi vey. What a great way to come home from a vacation in Canada. Any help appreciated.

[Jovan]

Yep...

[Sythe]

SCROTUM

[Jovan]

You know, that's incredibly helpful.

[celticgeek]

Have you tried just pulling the plug on the thing, waiting a couple of minutes and then plugging it back in and starting over? 

I have cured a couple of those sorts of problems that way, although I never did figure out what caused them.

[MusicScribbles]

Call the Geek Squad! Actually, I agree with the unplugging the computer idea. At least, do that if you can't fix it any other way. It isn't good for the computer, so if you can figure out the problem without doing that, kudos. Also, unplugging the computer should work, but it might not, and just make the situation worse, depending on what is actually wrong with the computer. Did you leave it on while you were away?

[DavidGrohl]

Unplugging the computer isn't unhealthy for it . . . perhaps if it was on when you unplugged it . . .

Geek Squad is a waste of money.  Follow these steps:

1)  Can you get to the BIOS?  If not, go to step 2
2)  Do you have a graphics card?  If not, go to step 3
3)  Read Below

After following those steps, I may be able to help you.  It sounds to me like you have onboard graphics, which means that your motherboard has fried or isn't working.  It would also explain why the keyboard and reset buttons aren't working properly.

[MusicScribbles]

I was joking about Geek Squad, but that's beside the point. Unplugging his computer at this point is unhealthy because he said he can't turn it off. That's bad.
Anyway, I think DaveGrohl has got the right idea. Consult him on comptech stuff. I was just going on about what I know of Windows. I'm one of those Macmen.