This has been
most excellent reading. Especially when not sleeping at nearly thee in the morning with someone else asleep behind you. Nothing like stifled giggles in the night.
Also, one of my friends would always have fake weddings with his 'girlfriend'
We had one of those little couples. The boy's name was Jeremy, and was one of those kids your parents tell you won't amount to anything good. I think he was also in AWANA (Christian kid thing. You memorize loads of verses and play healthy, run around like a stupid ass kid games) with me, too... Anyway, they'd get married every month or so. They used ring pops. The noon aides would just roll their eyes at them. And, actually, they said they were going to have sex too. My parents gave me awful sex education, so I thought it meant just lying next to someone of the opposite sex. Damn the Bible. I got made fun of for being the only one in eighth grade who didn't understand the physics of sex. Anyway. They actually had sex in a classroom. Good times.
Quite a few years later, halfway through high school, my dad got a phone call. It was a kid named Jeremy (the one and the same) asking for my brother. After informing this upstanding young gentleman that my brother wasn't home, Jeremy called my father all sorts of lovely names and hung up (reflecting back, my brother had this thing about selling certain substances since he was quite young. It probably had something to do with that). My pops waited about fifteen minutes, *69ed him, and got Jeremy's father on the line.
Jeremy looked a little beat up the next day in school.
Elementary School:
I was the little girl with large glasses who read during recess, but, when forced to play a game for PE, was somehow athletic and always picked first. Go figure. Once, I had a little crush on Bobby James in... third grade. He seriously passed me one of the notes: "Do you like me? circle yes or no." It was cute. So we held hands at recess, and instead of reading, I watched him play four square with the other boys. My mum happened to be a noon aide starting that year (highly convenient if you were ill, forgot to have a permission slip signed, or forgot your lunch at home), and asked me why I wasn't reading. I did a little blushie thingie and mumbled something and she walked off. Bobby gave me his granola bar from his lunch. By 2, we weren't together anymore. Ah, young love.
Elementary/Junior High:
I played soccer for quite a while. When I was ten, I was playing in the second game of the season against "The Ice Breakers." I have no idea what my team was named. I was left forward. Ten seconds into the game, I kid you not, the ball lands between me and the other team's right forward. We both run towards the ball, I chip the ball with my left leg, and the bitch kicks me in my right shin.
It broke. Want to know the funny part? I didn't cry, but she did. Little faker, you broke my leg. Your foot's fine. Anyway, my poppa didn't think it was broken. "It's just a bruise!" he says. I sat on the sideline the rest of the game, obviously, though I was HEAVILY encouraged to go back. After all, it wasn't swelling super bad. *rolls eyes* So, I get carried to the car (after hopping feebly and intoning that NO, I can't walk), and when we got home, dad stood me in the hall and told me that he wanted to see me walking by the time he got out of the shower. Naturally, I sat down after about five minutes of balancing on one leg and cried.
We always went to church on saturday nights. I said I didn't want to go, so the parents decided I'd go to "big church" with them. *sighs* That was a hell service. I don't think you're supposed to sit in a chair with your feet dangling when you have a broken leg. Went home, dad still encouraging me to "walk it off" (BASTARD), I hop to bed (on the lower bunk... I had my own bunk bed and always slept in the top... except when pain abounded). I didn't sleep all night... around three in the morning, my dad came in and apologized for being dumb and said he was taking me to the doctor in the morning.
Four years later, the gal who broke my leg (I always remembered her name, because her team sent me a get well card, and she wrote "i sory i kick your leg. i was tryin to kick the ball) stole my first "boyfriend." Bitch. I was going to break up with him anyway, but still. Bitch. Also, she had these pointy teeth and everyone called her a vampire.
...that was longer than I'd planned.
