Topic: Weirdest Ending of A Relationship? (Read 84504 times)

J-cob9000 · « **on:** 19 Nov 2008, 03:57 »

I was broken up with because I was too much like her brother.
What's your excuse?

Liz · « **Reply #1 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 06:03 »

Awww, Jens is a lot nicer than I would have been. This is a momentous occasion.

imapiratearg · « **Reply #2 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 06:09 »

Apparently offering to help someone stop harming his or herself is a bad thing.

Liz · « **Reply #3 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 06:25 »

No, no, even then I still do not see it.

jhocking · « **Reply #4 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 07:04 »

He is saying that someone broke up with him after he offered to help her stop harming herself. What is so complicated here?

If this offer included a heaping dose of patronization then I can totally understand why she was annoyed.

Also, is patronization a word? Firefox certainly doesn't flag the spelling, but it feels kinda like I just made it up.

imapiratearg · « **Reply #5 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 07:06 »

Joe's got it right. Sorry, I wasn't being very explicit.

0bsessions · « **Reply #6 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 07:12 »

Actually, I don't see this as that bad an idea for a thread. Hell, it could be fun. You remember fun, right guys?Let's maybe consider giving it a chance?

In terms of weirdest relationship ending...hmmm...

I'd have to say the weirdest reasoning I ever got was back in like 2005. My girlfriend suggested moving in together after both our leases ran up at the same time and we both wanted desperately out of our living situation. Weeks after moving in together, she started talking about marriage. She then broke up with me on the grounds that she felt I was getting 'too serious' and 'too clingy.'

The irony is not lost on me to this day.

mooface · « **Reply #7 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 07:18 »

i told my born again christian boyfriend that i was pro-gay rights and that i believe the bible was not literally written by god - it was written by men.

immediately following this conversation he stopped calling me. at first i was confused but i finally got the message when he stood me up on my birthday.

imapiratearg · « **Reply #8 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 07:27 »

That's crazy.

valley_parade · « **Reply #9 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:27 »

I left her a voicemail.

jhocking · « **Reply #10 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:29 »

Was the message of the voicemail that you want to break up, or was it a perfectly innocent voicemail that you left without realizing she hates voicemail and she broke up with you because of that?

Quote from: Ptommydski on 19 Nov 2008, 07:58

She was an attractive but slightly crazy lady.

The best stories start this way.

0bsessions · « **Reply #11 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:32 »

A voicemail raped her dog.

Caleb · « **Reply #12 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:33 »

I was broken up with because the girl in question had some funky Fae-Wiccan beliefs and believed that I was possessed by a demon.

She approached me in a crowded hallway and started chanting a spell at me.

Note that I never did anything remotely bad to her at all. I was actually a pretty nice, considerate guy back then. I think I set her off because I wanted to spend a bit more time with media production and less time spending EVERY WAKING SECOND with her doing what she wanted to do.

Of course there is always the chance she was right.

But I always have gone with the theory that she was batshit crazy.

valley_parade · « **Reply #13 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:36 »

Quote from: jhocking on 19 Nov 2008, 08:29

Was the message of the voicemail that you want to break up, or was it a perfectly innocent voicemail that you left without realizing she hates voicemail and she broke up with you because of that?

The voicemail was that we WERE breaking up. That woman was IMPOSSIBLE to get a hold of (she went to the University of Rhode Island, and I live in Western Massachusetts). Plus she was sleeping with dudes that were definitely not me.

october1983 · « **Reply #14 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:40 »

This one girl broke up with me because she apparently no longer found me attractive. What the hell?

I wish I had some better stories.

ampersandwitch · « **Reply #15 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:52 »

He gave me a B+

jokes

Drill King · « **Reply #16 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:53 »

I just broke up with an ex because I no longer found him attractive. I am sorry October!(I have no idea your name) (hint, dudes, do not cry before, during, or after any sort of physical anything)

I don't really have any weird ones, and no one has ever broken up with me.. god I am boring.

jhocking · « **Reply #17 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:56 »

Quote from: Drill King on 19 Nov 2008, 08:53

(hint, dudes, do not cry before, during, or after any sort of physical anything)

For the record, this mostly applies to girls too. Crying because you are overcome with joyful emotions is fine in certain contexts, but definitely don't shed tears in the "where did my life go wrong" sense.

Quote from: Drill King on 19 Nov 2008, 08:53

no one has ever broken up with me.

Hey do you want to go out with me?

Drill King · « **Reply #18 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 08:59 »

Totally Johnny! But only if you dump me in a really terrible way after I nag you all day just so I can bitch about it on my LJ

jhocking · « **Reply #19 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:00 »

Awesome!
/

Wait, my name isn't Johnny.

fuck we are so over.

Crazy bitch.

october1983 · « **Reply #20 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:03 »

Quote from: Drill King on 19 Nov 2008, 08:53

I just broke up with an ex because I no longer found him attractive.

Yeah, but the point is someone did this to me.

Also, that I didn't have any interesting breakup stories, so I went for a fairly common one!

ampersandwitch · « **Reply #21 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:05 »

But women love spies!

Drill King · « **Reply #22 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:06 »

Quote from: jhocking on 19 Nov 2008, 09:00

Awesome!
/

Wait, my name isn't Johnny.

fuck we are so over.

Crazy bitch.

Shit! Man, dude, you should have txted this or left a post-it note.

Also, October man. The dude I did it too was pretty good lookin'

valley_parade · « **Reply #23 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:09 »

I figure the next time I need to break up with someone, I'm going to use a carrier pigeon.

jhocking · « **Reply #24 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:13 »

Try to date someone who has a relative that was pecked to death.

october1983 · « **Reply #25 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:14 »

Quote from: ampersandwitch on 19 Nov 2008, 09:05

But women love spies!

At least I will be having lots of relations until I die of being a bad spy!

Caleb · « **Reply #26 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:15 »

Quote from: valley_parade on 19 Nov 2008, 09:09

I figure the next time I need to break up with someone, I'm going to use a carrier pigeon.

Or a note tied to a flaming arrow show through a window. Classic.

valley_parade · « **Reply #27 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:20 »

I just want the breakup. I don't need an arson charge added onto it, man.

october1983 · « **Reply #28 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:23 »

Breaking up over the forums is obviously the classiest thing.

CardinalFang · « **Reply #29 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:25 »

In my very first relationship I discovered that we had broken up when the new boyfriend came over.
Fun times.

I was broken up with via email once. Mind you this was not an online relationship so I thought doing it via email was a tad cold. I would have preferred a voice mail message really.

jhocking · « **Reply #30 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:28 »

Quote from: october1983 on 19 Nov 2008, 09:23

Breaking up over the forums is obviously the classiest thing.

hey shut up man she was cheating on me with johnny

october1983 · « **Reply #31 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:32 »

Maybe that's because Johnny isn't the kind of a dude who goes around ruining dreams.

Drill King · « **Reply #32 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:36 »

Being with him was like a dream..

but Jason! I only have eyes for you baby.

jhocking · « **Reply #33 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:42 »

jesus christ were you cheating on me with jason too???

0bsessions · « **Reply #34 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:42 »

Quote from: Drill King on 19 Nov 2008, 08:53

(hint, dudes, do not cry before, during, or after any sort of physical anything)

I cried a little when a dog bit me in the face one time. That was a physical something.

I am so unmanly!

*Sob*

Quote from: CardinalFang on 19 Nov 2008, 09:25

I was broken up with via email once. Mind you this was not an online relationship so I thought doing it via email was a tad cold. I would have preferred a voice mail message really.

Weaksauce. I was once dumped via E-Mail and then informed via another E-Mail from her best friend she'd been cheating on me and didn't have the stones to tell me herself.

0bsessions · « **Reply #35 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:43 »

Don't cheat with Jason. Any Jason. Anywhere. Yelley will grind your bones to dust.

CardinalFang · « **Reply #36 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:46 »

I know it was rather weak but it's what I had to go with.
I bow to your superior broken-up-with-fu.

Joe, it appears that our dear Drill King likes guys whose name begins with J. So keep an eye on Jon as well.
Granted this doesn't explain Tommy but then again what does?

0bsessions · « **Reply #37 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:47 »

The drama that would erupt from that one would be absolutely hilarious.

Until I realized I was smack in the middle of it.

That would probably suck.

jhocking · « **Reply #38 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:50 »

*punches jon from behind in the left kidney*

KickThatBathProf · « **Reply #39 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:52 »

Joe, you should probably start punching everyone who's name starts with J...and T (because of Tommy)

Shit you should just punch everyone

clockworkjames · « **Reply #40 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 09:53 »

Reverse Bel-Air.

Cernunnos · « **Reply #41 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:04 »

For some reason girls think thanksgiving is a good time to break up with me. It's happened twice. yeah that's all I got.

0bsessions · « **Reply #42 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:05 »

I am too competetive for my own good...

I got dumped on Christmas Eve...

Twice.

bob, just bob · « **Reply #43 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:14 »

the oddest end to a relationship I've had was probably this one time, after the girl in question and I had finished being "intimate" she looked at me and said "do you mind if I smoke?" it was her house so I didn't really care and said as much. she then proceeds to pull out a piece of tin foil and just starts to go at it. I respond with a "oh... oh you meant heroin... wow just... wow" yeah so that was the end of that business... I mean the least she could have done was offer to share.

michaelicious · « **Reply #44 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:38 »

Quote from: clockworkjames on 19 Nov 2008, 09:53

Reverse Bel-Air.

Please elaborate. I want the details of how to work a Bel-Air into a break up.

I don't have any interesting break up stories, really. When I was sixteen I was dating an older girl and I guess she just assumed I was her age and it never came up and she broke up with me when she found out I was only sixteen. Annnd another time a girl just straight up stopped talking to me. It wasn't even malicious or anything. I still see her around sometimes and it's friendly and not-awkard. It was kind of "just a fling" anyway, I guess. Secretly I think it was because she was really into DDR and I wasn't.

StMonkey · « **Reply #45 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:43 »

http://xkcd.com/464/

The Reverse Bel-Air

BlahBlah · « **Reply #46 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:44 »

I don't see what RAM has to do with relationships Michael.

jhocking · « **Reply #47 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:46 »

I think he means Dance Dance Revolution. That could totally rip apart a relationship.

StMonkey · « **Reply #48 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:47 »

Obviously not RAM-ing her enough

see wut i did there?

Social Bacon · « **Reply #49 on:** 19 Nov 2008, 10:48 »

When I broke up with my previous girlfriend she refused to accept that we were no longer dating and continued to follow me around. When I told her to get the hell away from me I was standing at the top of a flight of stairs, which she then attempted to kick me down...

THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

Author Topic: Weirdest Ending of A Relationship? (Read 84504 times)

mooface