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Author Topic: awesome put-downs  (Read 5281 times)

jhocking

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awesome put-downs
« on: 18 Nov 2009, 06:04 »

I just read this article and it quotes James Cameron saying one of the best lines I've heard in a while to criticize one of his crew:
“Hiring you is like firing two good men,”

What are some of the best put-downs you've heard?

Chad K.

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #1 on: 18 Nov 2009, 07:55 »

"I won't insult your intelligence by assuming you really believe what you just said"-William F. Buckely, Jr.  Hate the man; love the wit.
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KickThatBathProf

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #2 on: 18 Nov 2009, 08:10 »

"I liked your opera; perhaps I will set it to music" -Ludwig van Beethoven-
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pwhodges

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #3 on: 18 Nov 2009, 09:33 »

It is traditional at high table in some Oxford colleges to frown on talking shop.  The computer scientist Christopher Strachey on being berated for talking shop replied:

"The reason, sir, that we  talk shop is that our  shop is interesting."
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SonofZ3

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #4 on: 18 Nov 2009, 09:46 »

Her: "Maybe you shouldn't go talking behind people's backs"
Him: "I can't talk behind your back _____, its always against a mattress"
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JD

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #5 on: 18 Nov 2009, 11:46 »

"You're way better at _____ than I thought you were."

Perhaps that more of a back handed compliment
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MrBlu

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #6 on: 18 Nov 2009, 16:53 »

Her: "Maybe you shouldn't go talking behind people's backs"
Him: "I can't talk behind your back _____, its always against a mattress"
Yes.
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Siibillam-Law

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #7 on: 18 Nov 2009, 16:57 »

"The only decent impression he can do is of the man with no talent."

Blackadder. Your number one source for all best put-downs!
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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #8 on: 18 Nov 2009, 18:11 »

Quote
You're drunk
Code: [Select]
I may be drunk, miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly
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Christophe

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #9 on: 18 Nov 2009, 18:12 »

"The girls come to see me,
Because they can't fuck
You'll never sell records
Because your rap sucks"

-Gary Switling, AKA Chuggo, AKA Lakeshore Boulevard's Most Wanted
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Bastardous Bassist

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #10 on: 18 Nov 2009, 18:22 »

Blackadder. Your number one source for all best put-downs!
But
Quote
You're drunk
Code: [Select]
I may be drunk, miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly

The number one source is actually Churchill.
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ZJGent

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #11 on: 18 Nov 2009, 20:00 »

"Some cause happiness wherever they go. Some, whenever they go."
"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."

Oscar Wilde, you rogue.

Although, further to the argument for Winston Churchill as primary source of put-downs is his rejoinder to George Bernard Shaw:

 “I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.”
–George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

“Cannot possibly attend first night; will attend second, if there is one.”
–Winston Churchill’s response to George Bernard Shaw
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KickThatBathProf

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #12 on: 18 Nov 2009, 20:35 »

Another Churchill:

"If I were married to you, I'd put poison in your coffee."
-Lady Astor(to Churchill)

"If you were my wife, I'd drink it."
-Churchill
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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #13 on: 19 Nov 2009, 00:49 »

Lady to Dr Johnson: "Sir, you smell".
Dr Johnson to Lady: "No madam, you  smell, I stink".
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"As long as we're all living, and as long as we're all having fun, that should do it, right?"  (from: The Eccentric Family )

BeoPuppy

Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #14 on: 19 Nov 2009, 03:17 »

There goes the good time that was had by all. -- Bette Davis
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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #15 on: 19 Nov 2009, 04:30 »

There's an epigram attributed to Samuel Taylor Coleridge, written in response to a critic I guess:

Quote
Sir, I admit your general rule,
That every poet is a fool,
But you yourself may serve to show it,
That every fool is not a poet.
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Spluff

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #16 on: 19 Nov 2009, 06:16 »

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening - but this wasn't it".

"From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it".

-Groucho Marx

Fuck Churchill, the king is right here.
« Last Edit: 19 Nov 2009, 06:23 by Spluff »
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Damnable Fiend

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #17 on: 19 Nov 2009, 21:52 »



actually Achewood has tons of awesome put-downs.  I was just re-reading this one recently though, so it came to mind.
« Last Edit: 19 Nov 2009, 21:54 by Damnable Fiend »
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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #18 on: 19 Nov 2009, 23:06 »

Every time I see an Achewood strip and they're talking about how they're all cats or something I have to do a double-take and remind myself that they're not all bulldogs.
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Jace

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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #19 on: 19 Nov 2009, 23:09 »

I thought they were all dogs.
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Re: awesome put-downs
« Reply #20 on: 20 Nov 2009, 02:36 »

That would be weird
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