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Author Topic: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?  (Read 13709 times)

Professor Snuggles

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I am wondering what the average age is for someone realizing that they aren't going to be a famous novelist, great musician, etc. What point you were at when you decided that fuck it, you were gonna get an office job, make enough money to live and maybe a little more, or even a lot more, and that would be it. Also wondering what made you give up, how dissatisfied you are with the career you have, if you are dissatisfied, and whether or not you're still kind of trying a little.

Also feel free to brag if you are completely living your dreams and doing everything you ever wanted to do.
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Drill King

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #1 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:44 »

Yeaaaah young and excited n' livin' da dream.


(poor)
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öde

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #2 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:46 »

I want to be able to fly.
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plumbob78

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #3 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:51 »

I have not yet given up on my dream. One day they will be able to make me a cyborg!
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #4 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:52 »

What about serious responses, guys? I am actually really interested in this question right now.
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JD

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #5 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:53 »

Perhaps some people haven't given on their dreams?
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #6 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:54 »

I quit tattooing, uh... I don't know, when I was 27ish or so in order to go back to school and do something respectable.  Though I have thrown a few here and there on people I know, the shop got closed around 99?  Yeah, that's about right.

A decade-ish later I'm thinking about giving up respectable and going back to being a completely non-respectable scumbag again.
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tania

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #7 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:57 »

even since i was really small i had this kind of bizarre obsession with birds. my dream #1 ever since i could remember was to become an ornithologist and study birds forever. i guess i gave up on that dream when i started applying to universities during my senior year of high school and realized maybe my grades weren't good enough to be a science major. i enrolled at the university of guelph in sociology on a complete whim with absolutely no clue as to what i wanted to do with my life and somewhere in those four years became really fascinated with rehabilitative justice. now i've revised my plans slightly and i'm trying to get into school next year to do my master's in criminology so i can have some kind of career in that area. if i don't get in come this spring, i guess that'll officially be the point where i give up on dream #2.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #8 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:58 »

I just want to fly (hang gliders, planes, etc) and walk up mountains. I've never been able to keep a career goal for more than a few months, which is why I dropped out of college and haven't started university yet. I've decided to try to study what has consistently interested me, and something I won't be completely incompetent in, and possibly take a masters in a fairly different, but related field.

One day they will be able to make me a cyborg!

One day 'they' will be me, hopefully.
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ackblom12

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #9 on: 28 Dec 2009, 17:58 »

I was probably around 16 or 17 when I realized that I was never going to get into game design because I had no actual interest in programming. The shit put me to sleep. Other than that, I'm not actually sure I've had any real "dreams" career wise.

As of right now I'd say the best thing that could happen for me is becoming a house husband. Can't think of any career I honestly want to keep up with as a career right now.
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plumbob78

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #10 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:00 »

OK. I can be serious.

I never really had a single all-consuming dream to work towards. When I was in High School, I thought physics was really cool and thought I might like to study it and be a physicist. But I gave up on that after realizing I have no aptitude for higher math. So I fell back on my great love, history. I thought maybe I would be a history professor. But then one year one of my professors (later to become a favorite) introduced himself by rattling off all of the places where he'd been, and I realized that I could wind up an academic carpet-bagger, bouncing around like a pinball trying to get tenure. So I said fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck THAT!

I then had zero clue what to do. I was despairing at having to work in some damn office with no purpose other than to make money for a corporation. Then my current job fell in my lap. My employer was on campus, I interviewed with them and got a job offer on the spot. In a field I had never thought of but that suits me perfectly. I've been there for nine years now. Now my dream is to be the best I possibly can at what I do.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #11 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:02 »

I haven't given up on anything yet, but I'm only 22. I'm at uni studying to be a game programmer, and I sideline in stand up comedy. Livin' the dream, fellas.
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Coward

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #12 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:03 »

I'm living the dream. I mean, life could be better, sure; it could be an awful lot worse too, though.

When my Roy Batty moment comes, I've had enough moments of marvel to look back and be happy with my lot.


Edit: I'm 23 and a service person.
« Last Edit: 28 Dec 2009, 18:04 by Coward »
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sean

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #13 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:07 »

my dreams are basically to hold some sort of job down while i play music. im in music school right now.

i have no idea where this is gonna lead me though.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #14 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:11 »

I'm studying to be an architect. There are so many things I want to do in my field, and I think I have the opportunity to do them. Among making amazing buildings, I want to be involved in Architecture for Humanity and start up a Sydney Chapter, if there isn't one by the time I graduate. I think I would also like to work overseas, but I'm pretty sure I don't want to sell out and work for a big developer.

I just finished my undergraduate degree, and will complete my masters after working for a year or so. So right now i'm looking for a full-time job to help me get to right kind of experience I need to ace my masters. Also I'm getting involved with student activism in architecture and trying to get somewhere with that.
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Alex C

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #15 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:13 »

I don't think I've ever really felt like I had a dream or a calling. I mostly just want to be happy and I'm not particularly good at it.
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ackblom12

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #16 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:14 »

oh, yeah, outside of career being happy is about it. I think I'm doing a mostly good job at that.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #17 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:16 »

I think part of it is that well, I dream really, really big, to the point where I'm not really sure if that stuff counts. The things I want to happen cannot happen basically by definition. So, I gave up pretty much as early as I can really remember. For example, it'd be pretty awesome if everybody liked me, but I learned that it ain't happening pretty early.
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Jimmy the Squid

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #18 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:22 »

When I was in junior high I wanted to be a fighter pilot. All my teachers discouraged me from doing so as they said I wasn't smart enough to be accepted into the RAAF. I like to think that I was smart enough, but it turns out that my eyesight is bad enough that I wouldn't get in anyway. So that's dream number 1 down at 16 years. Then I thought, that as I like writing that I'd want to be some kind of writer (I was particularly interested in script writing and I wanted to develop a tv series). I did the highest level of English it's possible to do in high school and got 98% for the television script I wrote for my major work. I got into uni to do a Bachelor of Arts - Creative Writing and did that for the first semester (dream number 2 died here at about 19). I took Psychology as one of my electives and fell in love with that subject so I changed my majors and spent the next four years studying Psychology at one of the worst unis in Sydney which it turns out had the best Psych faculty in the state. After finishing my undergrad I applied for post grad but did not get in. I did a make up year to get my marks up (which I did) but again, was rejected. I've applied again and will hear back in January. If I don't get in this time I will probably never get in so that'll be dream number 3 dying at age 23. I think I'll be ok with it though, I'm still unsure as to whether I even want to go back to uni anyway.

Dream 4 (my plan b) is to do a small business course at a technical college and open a comic book shop. We'll see how that goes.
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Lines

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #19 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:42 »

I am not giving up my dreams of having a unicorn you can't make me.
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jhocking

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #20 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:58 »

I'm really interested to read everyone's responses but I don't have time right now, I'll have to come back and read them some other time.

Me, I'm about spitting distance from a full-time teaching position as a professor in an art school. My primary goal for quite some time has been developing games, and hey look that's what I do.

Zingoleb

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #21 on: 28 Dec 2009, 18:59 »

I want to be a musician. :( Barring that, working on other people's instruments to build or repair is pretty cool and I've gotten a bit of experience in having to fix everyone else's guitar but mine.

I also want a tail. A big, long fluffy black and white tail. I'm completely serious on this one.
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DonInKansas

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #22 on: 28 Dec 2009, 19:12 »

I was 21.  I thought all my life I was going to be an elementray school teacher.

Then I went to school, realized teaching is 20% about the kids and 80% political bullshit, met a ton of people with teaching degrees that weren't teaching, and decided not to do it.
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Zingoleb

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #23 on: 28 Dec 2009, 19:20 »

I used to want to be a teacher until I realized that putting up with such insane amounts of bullshit in high school drove me up a fucking wall when I was 15, having to deal with it all over again when I was all growed up would make me put someone's head through a wall. Probably mine own.
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Blue Kitty

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #24 on: 28 Dec 2009, 19:55 »

I don't know. I've never really wanted to be any sort of famous profession as far back as I can remember. I do want to start a band, but I don't care if it goes anywhere.  If anything it would be a launching point for my cousin since he's the better musician.  I did want to be a journalist once, but after taking a class I got really bored of it
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #25 on: 28 Dec 2009, 19:56 »

In all seriousness, I wanted to be an artist when I was a kid and so I went to art school, moreso because I wanted to teach art than be an actual artist. I decided to skip getting my license so I could have some life outside of school for a bit and now I'm going to go back to get my license. I haven't quite given up yet.

But before that I wanted to be a vet. That dream was dashed when I shadowed a vet when I was 16 and watch a cat get neutered and found out I wouldn't really have the stomach for that. Also now I realize I would be an emotional wreck anytime someone brought in a pet to be put down, so yeah, there's that.
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Slick

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #26 on: 28 Dec 2009, 19:58 »

I think I gave up on the dream of being an amazing god of science and mathematics maybe three or four years ago? Realized I didn't give a much of a damn about my classes but that everything else I was doing was pretty cool.
I got into cooking in a big way but recently semi-gave up on my dream of being a baker in the yukon when I told the guy I couldn't do the heavy lifting involved at the bakery on account of my shitty knees.
Now I do not have an office job but I might go in for such in the interest of continued existence. Maybe I will rekindle and old dream or come up with a new one first, though, but I'm not sure.
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Ikrik

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #27 on: 28 Dec 2009, 20:02 »

The first year of University taking science was enough to completely discourage me from ever wanting to be a doctor.  When my sister wasn't accepted into Med school I gave up that dream completely.

Right now I'm hoping to be a teacher.  The only reason I graduated was because I had some seriously awesome teachers who helped me out.  My biggest problem with teachers is that when they don't care it affects the student so much.  If your History teacher hates his job, you're not going to enjoy his class.  I enjoy teaching and I think that things are going to work out.  I'm seeing how long that dream is going to last for.  

Honestly though, I have more dreams about my future asides from work.  I want a room filled only with books, a cat that I'm not allergic to, and a house close to the beach.  The plan is not to give up on that one.
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BrittanyMarie

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #28 on: 28 Dec 2009, 20:24 »

I was 19 and I was going to be a pharmacist. I am too lazy for the schooling, basically, so I switched to sociology, which I fell in love with but you need a minor or a few years of a foreign language. I had a semester left with a minor in management communication when I had too many panic attacks and hated everything and everyone and now I am a corporate drone at a stupid call center for a pretty large bank. I hate it. Even if I go back and finish my degree, I'll have a totally bullshit job that I could have already had without a degree but with way less debt.
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David_Dovey

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #29 on: 28 Dec 2009, 21:00 »

I wouldn't say there was a single spot where my dream died. It's more like in Mario 3 where you'd get a mushroom or a feather and then you'd run afoul of a Koopa and you'd get downsized, except that it never stops happening.

I wanted to be a rock star, then I wanted to be a session muso, then a working muso, and then I trained and have been kind-of-but-not-really successful as a sound engineer.

I guess I still have dreams (I toyed with the idea of going to law school and maybe becoming involved with politics a fair bit this year) but they're more wistful "what-ifs" than anything substantial. Right now any work-related dreams I have have taken the backseat to personal dreams like traveling and relationships of all kinds and learning for the sake of learning. I guess in a way that's a sort of giving up? I don't know, I feel like I can resume my attempts at becoming a totally awesome engineer (or whatever I want to do professionally) when I've seen the world.
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nobo

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #30 on: 28 Dec 2009, 21:30 »

My childhood dream was to be a ninja turtle, so that dream was crushed around age 15 or so.

My real dream though is kind of undefined career wise. I just want to use my engineering background to help others. Originally I had planned to go into prosthetics but had trouble finding grad school professors interested in working with me. I will get back on that once my fiance finishes med school and we become financially stable. So I haven't quite given up on that dream quite yet.

Ultimately I want to live a long happy life with another person and raise a healthy, successful family. I'm getting married in a few months and kids are planned in the future. This is one dream I don't intend on ever giving up on.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #31 on: 28 Dec 2009, 21:31 »

I never really had big dreams, to be honest. I was never that great at anything. I'm in college right now but I have no fucking idea what I'm going to do with a degree in Political Science. I feel like maybe I should be doing things that interest me and make me happy, like work at a radio station or do some volunteer work, but I feel like I need a plan and I feel the sand going through the hourglass. I'm 23, in school on this one path, and I feel like I'm stuck. But I don't know where I'd jump to if I had the opportunity to pull stakes and move.

Really, I had two real dreams that I remember, one was to be game designer, and the other was to have a family. I had the former back when I was a kid and only thought about video games and had no idea what goes into them. A designer has to have a background that goes beyond design philosophy - you have to be able to code, or you have to be a decent artist, etc. I'm not artistic, my math skills are basic, and programming schools shed the majority of their students every year despite all their applicants being 10x as good as I am at math and logic. The latter, well, I think it really just has to do with this doomed feeling of uncertainty. I'm so frantic about it internally that I feel like I could live an average life taking an average paycheck at a not-very-interesting job in a nowhere town and as long as my life felt stable in some way and I had people who were dependable and stuck just as much as I was I'd take it.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #32 on: 28 Dec 2009, 21:34 »

I suppose I have dreams. I'm still only 15 so I should have them. I used to want to design games and things of that nature but then I realize how much work that really is and how boring programming really is so fuck that.
I have little to no ambition in school, if my grades are low Cs or above and just passing in Math, I am fine. I try to do better than that but not if it involves too much effort. I would, someday, like to open a small cafe or restaurant, perhaps with a used book and/or record store attached. That could just be the stereotypical indie teenager who wants to hang out in coffee shops all day, I don't know. I would really enjoy doing this, I think but I am still young and I guess I have a little while more to make my mind up.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #33 on: 28 Dec 2009, 21:46 »

ITT Game Designer seems like a really cool career until you find out what Game Designers actually do
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #34 on: 28 Dec 2009, 22:08 »

*ahem*

Excuse me, Dovey.


So! This could be interesting.

When I was little I wanted to be a gymnast or a tap dancer, but my parents never let me take lessons so that was dashed pretty early on. After that all I wanted to be was a model but honestly I looked like a scruffy little shit so that was never going to work.
I grew up a bit and got into computers in a largish way, building and modding them and hand coding websites and doing spots of graphic design for my friend's LJs and the like. I applied to do IT at University after school - and I was accepted at my last choice - but the campus was too far away for me to afford to travel there every day.
Instead I went to TAFE (like a community college) and did a half year IT course as a bridge to get into Web Design. When I realised I couldn't afford to do another course I gave up and applied for receptionist jobs. I worked as a temp doing data entry for a little while until I landed what I thought could turn out to be my dream job - a receptionist at an IT company.
After a month of full-time work I was fired because I couldn't figure out how to work the phones. Instead I got a job at Subway and realised that, oh hey, food service is kind of fun!
Whilst working in different cafes, bars and function centres, I completed my Certificate in Hospitality Supervision at TAFE and decided that I wanted to make coffee for a living. After a few years behind the coffee machine I became pretty skilled and ended up being a barista at a tiny, excellent espresso bar in Sydney. Dream achieved!
(Also in those years I did end up doing a little bit of photographic modelling so that's that dream fulfilled too, I guess. I also had a side project of becoming a bit of a photographer but after assisting with a couple of shoots and meeting lots of struggling photographers, I realised it was probably not going to be much of a successful venture.)
I was actually on track to becoming the manager of a new espresso/cocktail bar my boss wanted to open, but the long hours and the tiring work and lack of holiday pay etc were getting to me. My favourite co-worker left and everything turned into a giant mess and that was enough for me. I decided to apply, once more, for office jobs.
This was about seven months ago. After a month I was beginning to lose hope in finding something since I am not really trained or up to date with officey things. Then I applied to an ad asking 'DO YOU LIKE COMPUTER GAMES?'
The position was for an admin assistant in a company that created online games and slot machines, but they were splitting up to work on a new project - a giant fantasy card game/rpg. I was hideously excited at the interview and almost wet my pants when I got the job.
When I started I was doing your regular admin stuff, helping the Director's PA, cleaning the kitchen, getting coffees. When the Production Manager saw how well I was doing and had a chat to me he realised that I'm a bit of a gamer myself and my job shifted to focus more on the fantasy game side of things.
Next month I am being promoted to Assistant Production Manager and will be getting more into the writing/game design side of things. So basically this is the best thing ever and I would never have dreamed of being able to do something so cool and get paid for it.
So uh. Don't really dream of being in something big and maybe you'll get lucky like me I guess.

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #35 on: 28 Dec 2009, 22:24 »

I am hoping either we get some sort of coffee shop here or when I move out to bigger and better places, I can get a job as a barista or something in that field.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #36 on: 28 Dec 2009, 22:36 »

Well, I've been cooking for the last 3 years, which makes it my longest running field of job experience. Frustrating thing is that it's really ruined a lot of my passion for cooking, and coming into 2009 I was next in line to have my red seal paid for by the company I was working for, salary position upon completion. In February we had a change of Chefs, and the new guy had basically been brought in to clean house and replace the experienced staff with 16 year old kids, so my development package was basically handed off to a kid they hired off the street with no experience, and in may i was fired in a fashion that I could have gone to WCB and really shaken the milks but I was too angry to think about it clearly. So now I am working at an irish pub with little motivation and almost no real room for upward mobility trying to figure out what I want to do. Film school has always been a pipe dream of mine since I do not come from a wealthy family and I am already struggling to pay off my first student loan which was squandered on useless film studies at the local college. So, I suppose I was 21 when my dreams got squashed the most recent time.
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allison

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #37 on: 28 Dec 2009, 22:52 »

17
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ruyi

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #38 on: 28 Dec 2009, 23:19 »

What about serious responses, guys? I am actually really interested in this question right now.

Why don't you share, then?

Also, could people share what they're doing now? Curious about DonInKansas (cos I'm thinking about teaching), ackblom, and plumbob78. Don't mean to single you guys out, and I understand if people are intentional about not-talking about it since it's the internet. Just saying--me personally, I'd be curious to hear about it in the context of this thread.

I think I'm in between the time in which people have dreams (in the sense of specific aspirations far-removed from their current situations) and the time in which people end up having to make meaningful decisions that may preclude those dreams, so, I guess I can't really say what I'll do yet.

Actually, I might not have ever had career-specific dreams? Honestly, the only thing that I've known since I was young is that I want to raise children. I'll have to think about this more.
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Eris

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #39 on: 28 Dec 2009, 23:41 »

When I was at school I wanted to be a vet. That dream lasted up until I was about 16 and I went to a veterinary surgery for work experience and I realised how gory it would be. It was around that time I also realised how lazy I was and obviously didn't care about it enough to work hard enough to try ad get the marks a medical student would need. I don't think that dream ever got crushed or anything, but I just stopped wanting to do it.

For a while after that I wanted to do hospitality stuff, and did that in the last 2 years of high school and even looked into applying to hospitality schools. But at the same time I had this idea of a job that I wanted to do that I had no idea about how to go about it. It was essentially a job at an editing house, but it seemed like one of those things where you had to be in the right place at the same time, so I didn't really think that much about it apart from applying to uni for Creative Writing degrees.

Some things I learned after a year and a half at uni were: I liked the creative writing stuff rather than the communications stuff in my original degree; doing creative writing classes made me not want to write any more; linguistics is awesome; for what I wanted to do with my life, uni is not going to help much; going to uni seemed more like something I had to do, rather than something I wanted to do. So I stopped going earlier this year.

I am now living in Sydney and working in a cafe; it's not a necessarily well paying job, but the people who are there are nice and I am happy. Every now and then (and especially when I was at uni) I feel like I am wasting time here and should be going to uni to get a job somewhere before I get too old to go to uni, but I think at the moment I am just happy to be happy. If I start getting stir crazy again and really want to learn linguistics again then I will either go to TAFE or apply to one of the many unis or correspondence courses available. But at the moment at the ripe old age of 22, my dream is to just be happy for a while.
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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #40 on: 28 Dec 2009, 23:42 »

Oh yeah. I forgot about the year I studied as a mature age entrant part-time so I could get into a teaching degree at the Uni I was working at.
I got excellent results and got in but made it six weeks into the actual degree before I had a complete breakdown and quit in a sobbing mess.
I try to forget that ever happened.
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RallyMonkey

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #41 on: 28 Dec 2009, 23:46 »

When I was fairly young, I watched a bunch of Law & Order, and really wanted to be a state prosecutor. Before that, I had wanted to be, at various times: a bull rider, a country and western star, a professional baseball player, and a NASCAR driver.

Though, around the age of 12, I started taking an intense interest in movies. Got my first camera for my 13th birthday, and have wanted to be a filmmaker ever since then. I worked my ass off in high school and ended up directing three plays, writing and directing 12 short films, and completing one feature-length film before graduating. I am 18-years-old now, and made the admittedly risky decision of staying away from college and film school, and really doing something useful with the next four years of my life. Yet, that payed off about two months after graduating when I was commissioned to make a feature-length documentary over the course of 2010 which will be hitting the film festival circuit in early 2011.

So, I am definitely living my dream so far. All I want to do is make a living off of making films, and be able to entertain some people. I'm going to be making a relatively large amount of money for my age making a movie, and that money will allow me to find the time to secure financing for the other projects I am working on. I don't think I could really ask for anything better.
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David_Dovey

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #42 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:03 »

*ahem*

Excuse me, Dovey.

I did not know about all that advancement you had done, I was under the impression you were still doing Admin Assistant stuff. That is really cool though and I am incredibly happy for you!
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #43 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:18 »

What about serious responses, guys? I am actually really interested in this question right now.

Why don't you share, then?

It's hard for me to say, honestly. I haven't really "given up" yet, there are still a variety of things I could work towards and maybe even be successful at! I have realized more and more that if I do want to do anything in the creative world, it is going to be just as if not more important that I have the right connections than that I am actually really good at writing, which is still of interest to me. When I was way younger I really wanted to be a journalist, but I'm kinda done with that dream, just because journalism doesn't exist in quite the same way anymore. I could start a music blog or something, but that's about it.

I just don't expect to be incredibly successful like I used to. I am not going to be using my philosophy degree for anything that isn't philosophy, you know? And I'm not going to do anything in the realm of philosophy except be a professor. I'm not going to be the next Nietszche. I won't be the next Kerouac. I probably wont even get to write comic books, or movies, or any of that nonsense. But given this, I am currently thinking I'd like to do something in the foodservice industry, either running a restaurant, going to culinary school, or, my current main desire, running a bar. I think I could really enjoy running a bar. Think I'd even be pretty good at it, despite the low margin of success.

I honestly think the big thing for me is going to be getting over my fear of failure, because I don't have to give up on any of my dreams as long as I don't try, which so far I really haven't. Figure the bar would be an easy place to start, because somehow financial failure is less intimidating/scary to me than personal failure.

So yeah. Thinking a lot about it, not giving up quite yet.
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RallyMonkey

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #44 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:34 »

Something I see in your post that worries me is it having phrases like "I won't get to". I think one of the quickest routes to failure is waiting for permission. It seems like a lot of people waste away their time waiting. Waiting for a record producer to hear their music. Waiting for someone to hire them to write a screenplay. Waiting for someone to publish their book. Waiting for someone to acknowledge their existence.

If you want to write screenplays, then do it. Don't wait for anyone to give you permission. There's a wealth of information on how to do it on the internet. Final Draft is easily piratable, and you don't even need that. All you need is a drive to get it done. And once you're done with that, don't wait around. Write your comic book, open your bar. You don't have any reason to wait. No one's going to give you permission.
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ruyi

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #45 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:39 »

I could be wrong, but I think, oftentimes, if not necessarily in Kieffer's post, people say "get to do x" and they really mean "get to do x and achieve success with it, financial or otherwise." Cos if you want to do something for the sake of doing it, you'd do it. However, I think for people who don't desire those things (or even any particular thing) that much, then the fact that success isn't certain or guaranteed is enough to dissuade them from putting in the time and effort. And frankly, this is good--they'd probably regret it if they forced themselves to do it despite their misgivings.
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RallyMonkey

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #46 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:43 »

It's always easier to decide not to do something. But I doubt there are many people you view as successful who put things off due to fear of failure.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #47 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:45 »

I mean I've got multiple drafts of multiple screenplays started. I am saying the success thing.
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RallyMonkey

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #48 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:52 »

What do you think is stopping you from completing them? Story problems? Boredom? Fear of what others will think of the product?

Sorry if I'm coming off as a condescending dick in this discussion. It is not my intention. I just know that this thought process has really helped myself. I've always liked this from Robert Rodriguez's 10 Minute Film School:

Quote
The moment you think about that you want to be a fillm-maker you're that. Make yourself a business card that says you're a film-maker, pass them out to your friends, soon as you get that over with and you've got it in your mind that you're one you'll be one, you'll start thinking like one. Don't dream about being a film-maker, you are a film-maker.

I used to just sit around. When people asked me what I wanted to do with my life, I told them I was an aspiring filmmaker. My plan was to go to film school, get a film degree, and then it'd be easy riding from there. Surely someone would want to hire me if I had a film degree. And then they'd let me into their world, and I'd start making movies. Really simple.

Then I got realistic about it, stopped referring to myself as an "aspiring filmmaker" and started making films. And I think it has really helped me.
« Last Edit: 29 Dec 2009, 10:59 by RallyMonkey »
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ruyi

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Re: How Old Were You When You Gave Up On Your Dreams?
« Reply #49 on: 29 Dec 2009, 00:58 »

Then I got realistic about it

lol

I don't mean to be rude; rather, I think this is pretty clever, esp. since I imagine you (and most other people) probably thought that you were being realistic when you were trying to get a film degree first.
« Last Edit: 29 Dec 2009, 01:02 by ruyi »
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