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Author Topic: Foreshadowing of The Breakup  (Read 38490 times)

Carl-E

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #100 on: 25 Nov 2010, 07:58 »

What an image! 

Of course, it's been done - google "Edward Penishands" for a few laughs...

NSFW, in case you couldn't tell. 
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Carl-E

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #101 on: 26 Nov 2010, 11:57 »

OK, back on topic; benenator found this one, going back to before the beginning.  It was posted in the WCDT, but I think it belongs here, as well. 

With all the telegraphing Jeph did (hell, he was practically standing on a hill with semaphore flags spelling it all out), I'm starting to feel amazed that so many of us were thinking it could work out.  Of course, hindsight is what it is, and this is a pre-elationship strip, which is mainly about anxieties over starting something, not over the relationship itself.  but all the other times when they were together (including the ones not seen) make one thing painfully clear;

No matter how happy they made each other, no matter how much they (or any of their friends, or any of us) wanted it to work, there was a serious problem with the foundation of their relationship, and it was in Dora's head. 

Now, bear with me for a moment, here.  I'm going to extend the metaphor a lot further than it needs to go.

When a house has a serious problem with its foundation, there are only a couple of different options; you can try and fix the foundation in place, but that rarely works, unless the problem is a minor one.  You can walk away, tear the place down, and start from scratch.  That means a whole different house, you haven't salvaged anything.

The third option, one that does not occur to a lot of people because it's very hard to do, is to raise the house a couple of feet, and completely rebuild the foundation.  It's hard, expensive, time-consuming, and the process of jacking up the house can lead to further damage if not done carefully.  It's usually only done with historic properties, or homes that, for one reason or another, are considered irreplaceable by the owners.

But you can't live in a house undergoing repairs like this.  Before it happens, the residents have to move out, the house will appear abandoned, and the neighbors will wonder what will happen next; will it be torn down, or rebuilt?

Even with the new foundation, when the house is lowered back onto it, there will still be a lot of repairs that need to be done before anyone is able to move back in.

This, of course, is the option I'm pulling for in Marten and Dora's case.  I hate to see a beautiful and interesting house torn down.  The one I live in is one I saved from the wrecking ball myself.

I just don't know that the current owners are willing to put the time, effort, and other costs into it.  Ultimately, that's the deciding factor!



Why yes, both my father and grandfather were contractors.  Why do you ask?
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Skewbrow

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #102 on: 26 Nov 2010, 13:39 »

Heavy text. The more I think about it the more I feel like grabbing my emergency reservoir of smoky/peaty flavored consolation.

A big part of the problem is, of course, one of recognition. Is *this* a problem in the foundations, or is it just one of the idiosyncracies of the old (or not so old) house that rather adds to its charm, and makes living in there more interesting?

Damn it. I don't understand relationships worth shit (geekiness bleeding to asperger creepy doesn't help). Nineteen years of married life notwithstanding. Undoubtedly you have all heard it: "19 years (or anything in that ballpark) is kinda awkward. It's too early to start bragging, but it's also sorta too late for having second thoughts." 

Where's that scotch?

If you don't have any, have a :psyduck: G'night!
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pwhodges

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #103 on: 26 Nov 2010, 16:30 »

Nineteen years of married life [...] it's also sorta too late for having second thoughts.

My first marriage broke up at 22 years; I guess that when the kids leave home is not so uncommon.
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jwhouk

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #104 on: 27 Nov 2010, 04:16 »

I have found the ULTIMATE Foreshadow of the Breakup:

"You'd have to be some kind of idiot..."
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akronnick

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #105 on: 28 Nov 2010, 03:54 »

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parvles

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #106 on: 28 Nov 2010, 07:55 »

Been reading the strip for 4 years or so. Just reread the entire archives and I have to agree, it's pretty obvious that Dora is never going to be happy in this relationship when you read it from the beginning. I think most things have been pointed out already but this strip stuck out to me in context of Dora freaking out over Marten's haircut.
http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1302

The fact that she doesn't even recognize her hypocrisy when it's being pointed out to her speaks volumes, and it's something Marten spoke about with her, too ("you can talk about people you are attracted to all you want but you freak out when i look at someone else"). Dora is the only character who hasn't started to overcome her problems, it seems. Every other character has shown growth in overcoming their issues, and Dora seems to be the only one that takes her problems for granted. That's why the relationship couldn't work. Thank God for Faye pushing her into therapy, so her character can move forward. I guess the biggest problem with Dora was that first of all, she always had and issue with jealousy of Marten, secondly, that she never recognized when she was pushing him, and thirdly, that she seemed to skim over the fact that her issue was with jealousy and blamed her problems on sibling rivalry with Sven, which seems totally insane except for when she freaked out about Faye hooking up with him, which is one of MANY freakouts.

Anyway, just wanted to add that strip to the pile.
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flamingo

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #107 on: 28 Nov 2010, 09:49 »

Been reading the strip for 4 years or so. Just reread the entire archives and I have to agree, it's pretty obvious that Dora is never going to be happy in this relationship when you read it from the beginning. I think most things have been pointed out already but this strip stuck out to me in context of Dora freaking out over Marten's haircut.
http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1302

The fact that she doesn't even recognize her hypocrisy when it's being pointed out to her speaks volumes, and it's something Marten spoke about with her, too ("you can talk about people you are attracted to all you want but you freak out when i look at someone else"). Dora is the only character who hasn't started to overcome her problems, it seems. Every other character has shown growth in overcoming their issues, and Dora seems to be the only one that takes her problems for granted. That's why the relationship couldn't work. Thank God for Faye pushing her into therapy, so her character can move forward. I guess the biggest problem with Dora was that first of all, she always had and issue with jealousy of Marten, secondly, that she never recognized when she was pushing him, and thirdly, that she seemed to skim over the fact that her issue was with jealousy and blamed her problems on sibling rivalry with Sven, which seems totally insane except for when she freaked out about Faye hooking up with him, which is one of MANY freakouts.

Anyway, just wanted to add that strip to the pile.

But what about thatstrip where Dora says Marten can lust after other girls as long as he says Dora is the prettiest.
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parvles

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #108 on: 28 Nov 2010, 10:13 »

I mean, that goes back and forth. She also freaked out about the girl asking him out even though he immediately turned her down and told her he had a girlfriend. It's like my two friends who recently decided that they could totally do an open relationship if they were attracted to other people even though the boy is totally jealous of her even hanging out with other guys. Sure she can be ok with it, but there's something in her that just can't handle it (hence the freakouts). Dora jokes about Marten and other girls all the time, but if MARTEN says something about another girl, it's a totally different thing.

Anyway, since privacy was also a big thing for Marten in the breakup fight, I thought this one might be relevant, too.
http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1669

Looking back, Dora and Marten weren't living for very long, were they? I always get confused about the amount of time that has passed between events, but it's been like 150 strips since she moved in, which in QC time is like a month. Maybe the move also contributed to the issues in the relationship. A lot of the major issues came up since that point.
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Carl-E

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #109 on: 28 Nov 2010, 10:22 »

But what about that strip where Dora says Marten can lust after other girls as long as he says Dora is the prettiest.

That's Dora trying to bury her issues.  

Besides, it's not simple jealousy - she didn't say it, but he could look at other girls so long as they were not Faye.  That's where the issue lay.  

Dora's interesting because, as parvles mentioned, she has issues that she's unable to get past, but unlike other characters (Marigold, for instance) she's not self-unaware (un-self-aware?), she seems to know she has problems.  Only she doesn't recognize them when they kick in.  I have to say here that that's the way most of us work who have issues.  You may recognize them, but if you could tell when they were kicking in, then you could get past them, and they wouldn't be issues anymore.  It often takes another person to point these reactions out to us so we can make progress, and no one seriously called Dora on these until recently.  

The fact that in many of these strips her confessions of her issues were used as punchlines didn't help anyone (in the strip or on the forum) take her seriously, until things came to a head.  Even then, like a lot of us with issues, just knowing they're there, and even recognizing when we start falling into the old patterns 9as she finally has) won't get us out of them.  Strategies are needed.  They can come from within, or from others, and that's the main reason therapy works for so many.  

Lets hope it helps her.  
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songblade

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Re: Foreshadowing of The Breakup
« Reply #110 on: 02 Dec 2010, 21:54 »

http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=1400

More fodder for the Tai moves in on Dora people

Also,  :psyduck:  ... just because
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