Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

* - BESIDES the Baristas, pervs.

12 (29.3%)

The Hammer of DOOM! (In which to make Banana Smoothies)

1 (2.4%)

Malaysian Battle Spatula

2 (4.9%)

The Broadsword of DOOM! (A cheap replica of Excalibur)

1 (2.4%)

The War Ladle!

0 (0%)

The Laptop of DOOM!

1 (2.4%)

The wi-fi hotspot!

1 (2.4%)

Marigold's spare DS (she left it there after she got a 3DS)

0 (0%)

Will's motorcycle keys!

0 (0%)

The Mouthwash of DOOM!

0 (0%)

The Emergency Bourbon!

4 (9.8%)

Freezer for the Emergency Haagen-Dazs!

0 (0%)

A ROBOT HAMSTER! (Hanners brought in a working prototype for fun)

1 (2.4%)

Daft Punk CD's!

2 (4.9%)

A spare Pizza Girl Costume - but it's NOT PENELOPE'S!

1 (2.4%)

A +20 Bag of Holding!

3 (7.3%)

Hammerspace!

6 (14.6%)

Space Ham!

1 (2.4%)

Waffles, of course.

0 (0%)

You mean there's something ELSE behind the counter????

3 (7.3%)

Of course there is - the FLOWER POT HATS!

2 (4.9%)

Total Members Voted: 41

[HiFranc]

BoDJangles, that reminds me of an earlier strip.

[DSL]

Isn't there some sort of Internet rule that goes: The more deliberately outrageous you are for the sake of satire, the more likely it is some numbnuts out there will take you seriously?

Or is that just writing in general? (Paging Mr. Swift)

[TheEvilDog]

Ah, Claire. So tightly wonder that on a good drop she could bounce 70 feet into the air. Either that or she'll have a breakdown before she's 30. Both of which would be fun to see.

[Mr_Rose]

Isn't there some sort of Internet rule that goes: The more deliberately outrageous you are for the sake of satire, the more likely it is some numbnuts out there will take you seriously?

Or is that just writing in general? (Paging Mr. Swift)

There's something close; Poe's Law is about the difficulty of separating parody from sincerity when describing religious fundamentalism specifically, but I don't know of a more general form.

[St.Clair]

Ah, Claire. So tightly wound that on a good drop she could bounce 70 feet into the air. Either that or she'll have a breakdown before she's 30. Both of which would be fun to see.

Fixed that for you.  (Have done it myself.)
And yeah, I expect to see her experience several very hard collisions with Reality.  Kind of sad, really.    Still, that's part of being young.

[cesariojpn]

That said, I'm somewhat loathe to bring a book with me when I'm travelling, mainly because I always seem to end up destroying them in my backpack, so I bring a kindle with me now.

So... You're happier destroying your Kindle? 

Heh, more like: paperback book + backpack filled to capacity + two flights and attendant checking by security personnel + repeating = mulch by the time I get home.
Kindle + 1/5th the thickness of a book + hard plastic = 50+ books I can choose from anytime I travel

Yeah, but it's hard to have a proper book burning with an E-reader. Plus it's more toxic.

[Blackie62]

Oh poor poor naive Claire, take it from someone who's worked (Okay maybe "worked" isn't the right word, whatever you want to call high school library student aide.) in a school library for two years: the whimsy feeling of being in a library will fade quickly. There is pointless babbling in the form of any students actually in the library for anything but last minute homework, from the same group you get your running and yelling, and the idiocy is a given. Or maybe that's just because I worked in a highschool library. Although Claire is right, there is more than just stamping books and shushing people. There's shelving. Endless shelving of book after book till you notice trends in the check out patterns and start wondering who the hell is checking out so much Anne Rice. There's also stamping and barcoding upwards of 50 textbooks. And no, they won't let you shush people, that's the librarians job, you'll be busy shelving or hiding from the librarians so they think you're shelving.

That all said I did learn how to shelf by the Dewey Decimal System and how to juggle paperbacks, sadly I can't list that as job experience since it wasn't a job. Woe is me.

[Kugai]

Ahhh

Claire's a true Bibliophile.

[Omega Entity]

Or a Bibliodon.

[Is it cold in here?]

Over on Tumblr Jeph said that none of the interns is currently intended as a romantic interest for Marten, but leaves the possibility open for that to develop later.

[Method of Madness]

That's kind of spoilery, isn't it?

Modified: Just read his response, I guess I misunderstood.  If anything, it's the anti-spoiler because even he doesn't know.  Interesting.

[GroovyKinda]

"No distractions, no pointless babbling conversation, no yelling or running around like an idiot. Just peace and quiet."
Bwa-ha-haaa! Newbies!

2 months ago I chased and caught a chicken in our library's parking lot (the same one where I rescued a baby fieldmouse 5 years ago). Saturday I'm Obi Wan Kenobi for the kickoff of Summer Reading (same library where I was Snape in a teen mystery). There's a YouTube video of when someone hid two salmon in the ceiling of the men's room and we didn't find them for almost a week.  My other library had album release parties indoors after closing, and once a SWAT team had a standoff across the street. A patron told me that my job description should be: "I make people's lives better."
It's all distractions and conversations and running around and noise.
Seriously, libraries are the awesomest places to work in the world. I wouldn't leave the library for anything.

[jwhouk]

What I don't get is where the clowns come into play, GK?

[HiFranc]

[...]

That all said I did learn how to shelf by the Dewey Decimal System and how to juggle paperbacks, sadly I can't list that as job experience since it wasn't a job. Woe is me.

I don't know where in the world you are, or what the conventions there are, but, in the UK at least, you can mention it on your CV (what Americans call a Resume) even if it wasn't an official job.

[Soulsynger]

2 months ago I chased and caught  [ ... ]
It's all distractions and conversations and running around and noise.
Seriously, libraries are the awesomest places to work in the world. I wouldn't leave the library for anything.

Where do you work and can I apply for a work-placement? FOR LIFE?!

[VonKleist]

My college library is so depressing I can basically hear the staff thinking "please kill me, god".

[Soulsynger]

Smoothie is a banana mashed with a hammer? So... a banana hammerck?! Get it?!

Bwa-ha-ha-haaaaaaaaaaaaw! I crack me up some times! Pfffrrrrt.


edit:
And I see Marten is still mopey about girl-attention...

[Vurogj]

Wish I'd watched the stream now, I'm curious about the specials...

[Method of Madness]

@Soulsynger - That's terrible. I don't mean not funny, I mean terrible.  Think about it.  (shudders)

[Soulsynger]

@Soulsynger - That's terrible. I don't mean not funny, I mean terrible.  Think about it.  (shudders)

*sound of cogs (heh...) clattering*
... Ergh. You're terrible! °O

(... but thanks for the veiled compliment.)

[WAYF]

I would trust Hannelore to make a delicious, un-hammered banana smoothie.
Mind you, look at the specials board. She'd probably die of fright if somebody asked her to make those.

[Method of Madness]

Ha, I guess you're welcome?  It wasn't really a compliment or an insult, I just cringed when I thought of a hammer smashing...I'll stop there.

[Platypodes]

I love how whenever they aren't actively engaged in anything else, the interns all default to looking in all directions in a wide-eyed, slightly-nervous way.  It's a nice realistic illustration of first-day-on-the-job nerves, and it also looks hilarious when they're all doing it in a group.

Cheers to Jeph for skipping the obvious joke about Marten and three ladies: "ducklings in tow" is much more fitting and unpredictable.

The interns are clearly-differentiated individuals, and at the same time they're a nice cohesive unit for a lot of gags.

I'm really enjoying the art in this storyline, especially the details of everyone's body language.

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

Claire was being abrasive and super unlikable. Marten has actually been very polite to her, considering that she accused him of hazing them and basically called him incompetent to his face! When someone does that, they can't jolly well expect the person they were unpleasant to to turn around and be all flowers and smiles to them, because that's not how humans work!

There's also the fact that, frankly, Claire seems to be more prone to geek social faux pas than even fucking Marigold, what with starting out completely tightass and now sperging out about the perfection of libraries. I think that her being left out of the conversation and the group is baaaasically her own doing.

Anyway. Enough about Claire. Who's stil the best intern? Emily is still the best intern. She needs to become bros with Faye. Or Tai. Maybe bromance Tai? All I know is someone who hears about a smoothie consisting of smashed banana and immediately wants to try it is a good person.

[TinPenguin]

Claire seems to be more prone to geek social faux pas than even fucking Marigold

Hey now, why is it a faux pas to fuck Marigold? She's a nice girl!

[Method of Madness]

[Sidhekin]

I still don't quite have a handle on Emily, but I like what I see of her.

Definitely.

And the roomies' interplay is still going strong.

[Dr. ROFLPWN]

Claire seems to be more prone to geek social faux pas than even fucking Marigold

Hey now, why is it a faux pas to fuck Marigold? She's a nice girl!

....I want to be mad at this, but I can't, that was well played. Good on you. 

[Soulsynger]

Claire seems to be more prone to geek social faux pas than even fucking Marigold

Hey now, why is it a faux pas to fuck Marigold? She's a nice girl!

This. (... is the reason why I love the English language)


I wonder how Emily spends her leizure time. ... is she a Mythbustress?

[Welu]

Wish I'd watched the stream now, I'm curious about the specials...

I saw the end. Jeph wrote them behind their heads so I didn't see them either.

[DSL]

We will find Gabby didn't hear it quite right: Smoothie orders are given to Hanners, who is smashed.

You don't expect her to do this sober, do you?

And I, too, am curious about the specials. Did Hanners write them? She has those ... thoughts ... sometimes.

Although the fourth one sounds disgusting.

[Lubricus]

We will find Gabby didn't hear it quite right: Smoothie orders are given to Hanners, who is smashed.

I don't know, it looks like Hannelore is delighted to get that order - I can absolutely see her enjoying the prospect of attacking a banana with a hammer!

[TinPenguin]

Emily orders a smoothie. Hanners disappears to the back room. Thumps, splatters, and screams are heard. Hanners emerges with a gleeful smile and a not-so-innocent smoothie.

[jwhouk]

@Soulsynger - That's terrible. I don't mean not funny, I mean terrible.  Think about it.  (shudders)

*sound of cogs (heh...) clattering*
... Ergh. You're terrible! °O

(... but thanks for the veiled compliment.)

No, I think that was a Doctored compliment.

[jwhouk]

So - which of our intrepid interns will break first?

Claire (WAY too high strung)    36 (53.7%)
Emily (the book fumes will get to her eventually)    5 (7.5%)
Gabby (Too many whacks to the head.)    3 (4.5%)
Marten (He's gonna just snap one of these days!)    7 (10.4%)
Tai (She shouldn't have dropped the PCP in with the acid)    2 (3%)
Momo (It was inevitable - all that Victorian porn.)    7 (10.4%)
Space Ham!    0 (0%)
EXPLAIN STEAMPUNK!    7 (10.4%)
Er... Waffles?    0 (0%)

Total Members Voted: 67

---

And yes, I will do a new poll for today.

[Throg]

Okay, so Emily is now the most likable intern so far. She's getting all the best lines. Jeph may have Plans for Claire, but Emily has gotten the most chill funny laid-back personality so far.

[Lubricus]

As for the vote, I chose Banana Smoothies, but I feel that Friggin' Latte is missing from the list!

[iduguphergrave]

I voted for "Coffee from a cup Faye drank out of" but now I feel like a perv.

[Welu]

I went for Fresh F###in' Bagels because I liked the alliteration.

[cvcharger]

I voted for "Coffee from a cup Faye drank out of" but now I feel like a perv.

Based on my reasoning, I would just feel like an asshole, you see I wouldn't knowingly drink after a stranger (the title fits for Faye), I would just get it for someone else to unwittingly drink.  Then after they finish it, I tell them.  Mwhahaha.  Then again, if it was first thing in the morning, and I hadn't had my coffee yet, I probably wouldn't know the difference even if a gorilla spit in it.

[Bachi-Atari]

I voted for "Coffee from a cup Faye drank out of" but now I feel like a perv.

Based on my reasoning, I would just feel like an asshole, you see I wouldn't knowingly drink after a stranger (the title fits for Faye), I would just get it for someone else to unwittingly drink.  Then after they finish it, I tell them.  Mwhahaha.  Then again, if it was first thing in the morning, and I hadn't had my coffee yet, I probably wouldn't know the difference even if a gorilla spit in it.

And now you've got AIDS

[Danziker]

Can I have a coffe from a cup Emily drank out? XD

[cvcharger]

I voted for "Coffee from a cup Faye drank out of" but now I feel like a perv.

Based on my reasoning, I would just feel like an asshole, you see I wouldn't knowingly drink after a stranger (the title fits for Faye), I would just get it for someone else to unwittingly drink.  Then after they finish it, I tell them.  Mwhahaha.  Then again, if it was first thing in the morning, and I hadn't had my coffee yet, I probably wouldn't know the difference even if a gorilla spit in it.

And now you've got AIDS

Well, it's a good thing I make my own coffee then.  So I guess that goes back to me being an asshole.

[Thrudd]

   Three interns, one cup ... and a time traveling stainless steel dinosaur espresso machine.

Wonder how we can fit the IT angle in on this?

[DSL]

A single coffee bean, lovingly pounded into your forehead.

[Bachi-Atari]

I do get the feeling that Claire and Penelope would become fast friends if/when they meet, both have a love of books and are slightly high strung.

[gangler]

Or maybe they'd hate eachother. Funny how that works, but sometimes all the similarities just make the differences more glaring and all the passion just makes them harder to reconcile. It's like you meet somebody who's just like you in every respect, but they're a prescriptivist and you're a descriptivist and all you do is fight about it.

[Throg]

Well, at any rate, Hannelore seems more or less open to Emily right off the bat, with the slight :3 face. 

[gijora]

Hanners made me smile for the first time today. <3
Also, why is Daft Punk @ 200 dB not an option? It's by far the best special.

[Is it cold in here?]

200 dB