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Author Topic: Random Puns  (Read 347040 times)

Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1500 on: 17 Dec 2015, 17:03 »

Well done
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James The Kugai 

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Method of Madness

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1501 on: 17 Dec 2015, 20:18 »

You'd think I'd have heard that one a lot, but it's one of the rare ones.
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Emoroffle

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1502 on: 17 Dec 2015, 20:29 »

I thought I had one for this thread but it was a missed steak. I'll just be moo-ving on then.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1503 on: 20 Dec 2015, 11:26 »

If you are what you eat, does eating Indian bread make you a naan-entity? Does eating pahd Thai make you a pahd person?
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Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1504 on: 20 Dec 2015, 11:51 »

Or does eating Pancakes make you flat?
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James The Kugai 

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1505 on: 20 Dec 2015, 15:01 »

Do eating french fries make you Belgian?

Edit: Whoa, I just wiki'd fries and apparently "chips" only refer to steak fries, and not all types of fries like I'd assumed.
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They call me Mr. Madness.

Quote from: Polonius
Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.
MR ARCHIVE-FU MADNESS
Does anybody really know what time it is?
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1506 on: 20 Dec 2015, 20:33 »

If priests are defrocked, are judges disrobed? Are people who divorce women debrided? Are people whose cars are repossessed derided?

Can unprotected aural sex cause hearing AIDS?
« Last Edit: 21 Dec 2015, 11:48 by Is it cold in here? »
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Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1507 on: 21 Dec 2015, 12:28 »

Do eating french fries make you Belgian?

Edit: Whoa, I just wiki'd fries and apparently "chips" only refer to steak fries, and not all types of fries like I'd assumed.

Technically true, but where I come from we call all sorts of Fries Chips.  It's just a cultural thing really
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James The Kugai 

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1508 on: 21 Dec 2015, 20:27 »

I don't think I've ever tried a style of potato I haven't liked.
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They call me Mr. Madness.

Quote from: Polonius
Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.
MR ARCHIVE-FU MADNESS
Does anybody really know what time it is?
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1509 on: 24 Dec 2015, 19:32 »

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Quote from: Polonius
Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.
MR ARCHIVE-FU MADNESS
Does anybody really know what time it is?
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

Grognard

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1510 on: 24 Dec 2015, 21:19 »

LoLs.  :D
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1511 on: 24 Dec 2015, 21:52 »

That pun is like the prequels, better fits the name Star WORSE.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1512 on: 24 Dec 2015, 21:54 »

But, given the inverse nature of pun quality, that means it's fantastic.

Gotta Han it to you, I can't pretend I've never stooped Solo for the chance to make a proper pun.
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Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1513 on: 24 Dec 2015, 23:27 »

You may be Tarkin some sense there.
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James The Kugai 

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1514 on: 25 Dec 2015, 00:49 »

That pun did seem forced.
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1515 on: 25 Dec 2015, 12:32 »

Well, I did have to choke that one out.  I was at a Darth of ideas.
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James The Kugai 

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Method of Madness

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1516 on: 25 Dec 2015, 13:18 »

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Quote from: Polonius
Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.
MR ARCHIVE-FU MADNESS
Does anybody really know what time it is?
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

chaospersonified

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1517 on: 25 Dec 2015, 13:18 »

Well, I did have to choke that one out.  I was at a Darth of ideas.

So you wait a bit! A good one will come, sooner or Vader. Just Sith down a few minutes and one will pop up
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1518 on: 25 Dec 2015, 19:37 »

But before you post it take another minute and Maul it over.
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A "buttload" is an actual measurement, next time someone tells you that they need a buttload of something, tell them 126 gallons might be a bit too much.

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1519 on: 25 Dec 2015, 19:54 »

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Quote from: Polonius
Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.
MR ARCHIVE-FU MADNESS
Does anybody really know what time it is?
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

chaospersonified

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1520 on: 25 Dec 2015, 20:47 »



No offense, but this pun seems rather like a skull, which is to say boneheaded. I find it mildly humerus. We should find a doctor, someone well-versed in both puns and bone structure, they might could patella good joke about this sort of thing
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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1521 on: 25 Dec 2015, 23:17 »

But before you post it take another minute and Maul it over.

I've never before found such a wretched hive of pun and villiany.
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

chaospersonified

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1522 on: 25 Dec 2015, 23:55 »

But before you post it take another minute and Maul it over.

I've never before found such a wretched hive of pun and villiany.

Well these are just what come Mos Easily, is all.
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Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1523 on: 26 Dec 2015, 11:28 »

And you don't have to be Po faced about it.
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James The Kugai 

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Detachable Felix

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1524 on: 26 Dec 2015, 11:58 »

I dunno about Po faced. Red faced, maybe:


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RedWolf4

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1525 on: 26 Dec 2015, 12:26 »

I guess only time will tell if someone will pick up that marketing idea and rum with it.
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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1526 on: 26 Dec 2015, 13:28 »

I wouldn't pay for something like that without proof.
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

EvilDuckyBec

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1527 on: 26 Dec 2015, 23:05 »

A little late, perhaps, but...



EDIT: To clarify, "Hosanna in excel sheets". Ding dong merrily on high...
« Last Edit: 27 Dec 2015, 01:57 by EvilDuckyBec »
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SubaruStephen

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1528 on: 27 Dec 2015, 01:22 »

You must have loaded that one on a plane, cause that went way over my head.
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A "buttload" is an actual measurement, next time someone tells you that they need a buttload of something, tell them 126 gallons might be a bit too much.

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1529 on: 27 Dec 2015, 03:14 »

On December 1, the county medical examiner was informed that she was being replaced at the end of the year. She was surprised, since she'd only been in the position for the past eleven months, and had never had any complaints about her work. This was not disputed, but she was told that it was policy, and could not be avoided. "New year, new ME."
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They call me Mr. Madness.

Quote from: Polonius
Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.
MR ARCHIVE-FU MADNESS
Does anybody really know what time it is?
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

Is it cold in here?

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1530 on: 27 Dec 2015, 08:14 »

There is such a thing as unscented shampoo.

It would be handy to have the same for real poo.

EDIT: speaking of body functions, could we plant a hoax in medical textbooks that spitting is controlled by the pituitary gland?
« Last Edit: 24 Jan 2016, 22:50 by Is it cold in here? »
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1531 on: 08 Feb 2016, 04:16 »

So Jessi's mom had some Ernest Hemingway tea, and we were trying to figure out what kind it was, since the packaging didn't indicate it. I decided it was The Old Man and the Tea.
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They call me Mr. Madness.

Quote from: Polonius
Though this be madness, yet there is method in't.
MR ARCHIVE-FU MADNESS
Does anybody really know what time it is?
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

SubaruStephen

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1532 on: 08 Feb 2016, 11:27 »

I went to the Ford dealership to buy a small SUV, but I couldn't leave since all they had were Mustangs, Expeditions, Edges, Focuses, Fiestas, Explorers, F series trucks, Tauruses, Fusions, Flexes, 4 Transit vans, and a C-Max.

There was no Escape.
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A "buttload" is an actual measurement, next time someone tells you that they need a buttload of something, tell them 126 gallons might be a bit too much.

Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1533 on: 08 Feb 2016, 12:58 »

Goes with the Territory
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James The Kugai 

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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1534 on: 23 Feb 2016, 13:36 »

Comment under a photo of a cat inside a drum.

"I hope he's not ensnared."
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

cesium133

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1535 on: 23 Feb 2016, 13:40 »

He enjoys eating bass.
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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1536 on: 23 Feb 2016, 14:46 »

Yeah, he gets a kick out of it.
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

Is it cold in here?

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1537 on: 23 Feb 2016, 15:00 »

Cats like chicken, right? He could eat drumsticks.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1538 on: 23 Feb 2016, 17:00 »

Can catgut handle the feathery snare of chicken bones?
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1539 on: 23 Feb 2016, 18:44 »

I'm feline the answer could be yes, but that's entirely bass on almost no knowledge of purr-cussion instruments.
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Tova

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1540 on: 23 Feb 2016, 21:44 »

Tom-toms love drumsticks, and are not snared.
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1541 on: 24 Feb 2016, 14:15 »

Just so long as you don't let them near the Kettle
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1542 on: 24 Feb 2016, 17:26 »

Could you guys take a brake from these drum puns. Just stop, please.
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A "buttload" is an actual measurement, next time someone tells you that they need a buttload of something, tell them 126 gallons might be a bit too much.

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1543 on: 24 Feb 2016, 17:31 »

Why stop? This is a sign that we should not yield to the urge to quit. Perhaps a speed limit to the puns may help. I give the green light to that.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1544 on: 05 Mar 2016, 12:29 »

Is someone who studies Egyptian looped crosses an ankhologist?
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Kugai

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1545 on: 05 Mar 2016, 14:25 »

I've heard it's only a Pyramid Scheme
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1546 on: 05 Mar 2016, 20:35 »

If you install a stereo in a Chevy hybrid, are you putting an amp in a Volt?
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1547 on: 05 Mar 2016, 21:07 »

Is that a current model?
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1548 on: 05 Mar 2016, 21:11 »

Be careful. The electronics are sensitive to a static Spark. That can cause as much damage as an F150 tornado Fording a river like an Explorer.
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Re: Random Puns
« Reply #1549 on: 05 Mar 2016, 22:25 »

Oof. I don't fully understand the shift we've made into automotives, but I'm sure if I just Focus, I can find the connective tissue here, there's always something to connect these things, some Fusion to speak of.
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