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Author Topic: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.  (Read 690400 times)

Morituri

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2850 on: 24 Mar 2019, 16:32 »

Hmm.  There was this one version about the quick brown fox jumping the lazy dog over and over, but depending on the context it might have been considered obscene.   Besides, it was longer unnecessarily.

"Sphinx of black quartz, judge my vow" is objectively the best, having fewer repeated letters than either of the other two.

But probably not practical because

A) You couldn't possibly get it into elementary textbooks in Texas.  Fundie parents will be afraid that some reference to a beast belonging to the pantheon of a pagan religion is DEMON WORSHIP!

B) While there is widespread agreement on how to spell "Sphinx" and "Quartz", there are a lot of people who aren't in on the agreement for "Sphinx" (they tend to write "Sphynx") and a lot of people to whom "Quartz" is less familiar than "Quarts" and they will therefore mishear and/or misspell it that way even though it makes no sense.
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Tova

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2851 on: 24 Mar 2019, 18:22 »

I’m amused the tweet mucks the sentence up.
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2852 on: 26 Mar 2019, 10:55 »

Long and wholesome post that I put in a spoiler. Enjoy

(click to show/hide)
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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

War Sparrow

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2853 on: 26 Mar 2019, 11:11 »

I want to love something as much as America loves Mr. Rogers. Even Mr. Dressup (Canadian Mr. Rogers..sort of) doesn't garner that level of adoration.
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hedgie

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2854 on: 26 Mar 2019, 11:42 »

And as xkcd pointed out, moving to a Rogers street and getting a cat named Mr. is a guarantee that your kid will never go into pr0n.
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Thrillho

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2855 on: 26 Mar 2019, 13:27 »

That Mr. Rogers story is beautiful. I wish I'd had someone like him to watch on TV growing up.
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Morituri

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2856 on: 26 Mar 2019, 13:29 »

whatever you do, DO NOT turn off your filters and google "roger cat"

Trust me on this.  I haven't done it, I won't do it, and I'm pretty sure what would come up if I did and that's why I won't.
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LeeC

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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

Tova

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2858 on: 28 Mar 2019, 18:46 »

The Fundamental Matrix song is ten years old.

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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2859 on: 29 Mar 2019, 06:26 »

I would pretty much be the second player in this:
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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

cybersmurf

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2860 on: 29 Mar 2019, 11:04 »

The Fundamental Matrix song is ten years old.



The Matrix was released twenty years ago.
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Tova

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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2862 on: 30 Mar 2019, 19:46 »

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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

Blue Kitty

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2863 on: 31 Mar 2019, 04:19 »

How to trick a monkey
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Morituri

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2864 on: 31 Mar 2019, 08:12 »

< Thwack!  >
Oook.
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Pilchard123

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2865 on: 01 Apr 2019, 00:53 »

How to trick a monkey
...

Well, guess who's not on my Christmas list any more!
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hedgie

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2866 on: 01 Apr 2019, 08:01 »

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Morituri

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2867 on: 01 Apr 2019, 08:41 »

RIP Terry Pratchett.
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Blue Kitty

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2868 on: 01 Apr 2019, 10:09 »

How to trick a monkey
...

Well, guess who's not on my Christmas list any more!

You'd think I'd know having posted it, but it still gets me every time



« Last Edit: 01 Apr 2019, 10:20 by Blue Kitty »
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pwhodges

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2869 on: 01 Apr 2019, 15:24 »

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LTK

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2870 on: 01 Apr 2019, 15:31 »

How insensitive! The map lumps those three countries together as Poor Mexico, when they're clearly English Mexico, Dutch Mexico and French Mexico.
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Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

cybersmurf

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2871 on: 02 Apr 2019, 04:40 »

Since my glasses finally gave in after eight years of mistreatment and being slept on, I got the new ones today. And ho-leeeee sheet, I hadn't realised how badly it was micro-scratched. I can see (almost) properly again!
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Thrillho

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2872 on: 02 Apr 2019, 14:24 »

As if the word 'archipelago' would exist to these people.
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Cornelius

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2873 on: 04 Apr 2019, 01:10 »

Mexico in the sea, then, or watery Mexico? Cruise ports?
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cybersmurf

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2874 on: 04 Apr 2019, 01:11 »

Islandy Mexico.
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LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2875 on: 04 Apr 2019, 13:54 »

Things Americans Do the Rest of the World Finds Weird
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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

Blue Kitty

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2876 on: 05 Apr 2019, 08:45 »





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LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2877 on: 06 Apr 2019, 17:28 »



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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2878 on: 11 Apr 2019, 12:06 »

I have not seen this movie (Pentagon Wars) but not only is this hysterical, based on real events, but I think it also illustrates any kind of project inside a large organisation where the bosses get to put in their input. Whether its studio interference on a movie/tv show or trying to design the next iphone, this seems relevant:

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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2879 on: 15 Apr 2019, 10:48 »

TV detective vs tech guy
A fan in the comments put this together:
(click to show/hide)
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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

LTK

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2880 on: 18 Apr 2019, 15:08 »

I saw a comment from someone on how to properly prepare merganser duck:

"Use Olive oil on a pine board, put the cleaned merganser on the board, and put both in the oven at 400°F. Wait 30 minutes, throw out the merganser, and eat the board."
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Quote from: snalin
I just got the image of a midwife and a woman giving birth swinging towards each other on a trapeze - when they meet, the midwife pulls the baby out. The knife juggler is standing on the floor and cuts the umbilical cord with a a knifethrow.

LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2881 on: 19 Apr 2019, 12:06 »

Wes Anderson Horror Trailer (SNL skit)
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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2882 on: 25 Apr 2019, 12:15 »

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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

Case

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LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2884 on: 06 May 2019, 10:36 »


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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

pwhodges

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2885 on: 07 May 2019, 04:15 »

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LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2886 on: 07 May 2019, 13:01 »



sent this to my wife at work. People came into her office to check on her because she was laughing to hard... guess which one in the family refills the brita container me!

 :laugh:
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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

Welu

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LeeC

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2888 on: 12 May 2019, 06:33 »

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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

Blue Kitty

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2889 on: 12 May 2019, 06:47 »

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LeeC

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You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it. - M. Gustave

Case

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2891 on: 23 May 2019, 03:57 »

[tweet]1123709253527715841[/tweet]
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Tova

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2892 on: 24 May 2019, 17:58 »

This is a genuine email that I recently received. I think it might be spam, I don't know.  :roll:

Quote
Hello Beneficiary,

You have a new package from Apple that comprises of an (iPhone XS, Apple MacBook Pro and a Cheque of $6,480,000.00 USD), prepared for delivery to your house address, kindly reply back as soon as possible for more information via: [email protected]

Yours Faithfully,
Mrs. Rita McCarthy.

And yes, I know about the whole "they deliberately make them ludicrous to filter out all but the most gullible" thing, just to save you the trouble of posting that.

If you feel like writing back to that email address to troll them, or even feeding that address to some other spammer - please, be my guest.
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Yet the lies of Melkor, the mighty and the accursed, Morgoth Bauglir, the Power of Terror and of Hate, sowed in the hearts of Elves and Men are a seed that does not die and cannot be destroyed; and ever and anon it sprouts anew, and will bear dark fruit even unto the latest days. (Silmarillion 255)

zisraelsen

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2893 on: 24 May 2019, 21:19 »

"Rita,
How did you get this email, and how do you know my name?
Signed,
Ben Eficiary"
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Zack is easier to type than Zisraelsen, so

Is it cold in here?

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2894 on: 25 May 2019, 17:29 »

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Morituri

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2895 on: 25 May 2019, 21:50 »

You realize what's bizarre in that picture, right? 

You may think it's only youngsters going "just look at this freaky old thing, I think they were called pay phones," 

But look closer.  That's a VERIZON logo!!

So, if they're even remotely aware that land line phones are a different thing than cell phones, they're going, "Holy shit!  Verizon somehow got roped into providing service  for this pay phone that was ancient already when Verizon was founded, which doesn't even use the cell phone infrastructure that their business supports!  Pics or it didn't happen!"
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jwhouk

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2896 on: 25 May 2019, 21:54 »

No, the biggest shock is that it actually appears to be functional.
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cesium133

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2897 on: 26 May 2019, 05:31 »

The real joke is that that's in a coverage gap for Verizon cell phones. She's not posting that picture anywhere.
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OldGoat

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2898 on: 28 May 2019, 11:45 »

2600 readers sending a pic of a find.


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hedgie

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Re: This thread is like a broken pencil: pointless.
« Reply #2899 on: 28 May 2019, 11:57 »

Damn.  It has been a while since I picked up a copy of 2600.  Of course, it's one of those publications that I'll only ever pay cash for.
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