It is damned annoying to read pages and pages devoted to people who annoy other people and people who are annoyed by them.
Most places would be a heck of a lot better if people just made an effort not to annoy other people. Way back in the wayback, there was an early internetwork post-forwarding system called FIDOnet, whose rules required that people "Be neither excessively annoying, nor too easily annoyed." That is an ideal for which, IMO, we should strive. Some of us need others to shut up about certain things in order to feel safe, and one of the things that needs to be safe is the ability to express those needs. Some of us (including me, apparently) have opinions that can offend other people, and need to remember that we lose little or nothing by shutting up about those opinions. I don't have to convince anyone else to think what I think. They can think what they want and that's fine. More than once I've written a post, decided it would create offense, and just not hit the "Post" button.
There are places and times to do something deliberately even when you know that someone will be upset; As John Adams said, "You can't have a revolution without offending somebody." Adams was trying to do something good for the world. There are times and places to challenge people's safety and make them confront issues and think; as Margaret Mitchell said "You should be offended, and often, by someone who knows how." She was explaining why she sought out people who would force her to examine and expand her own worldview; she was trying to broaden understanding. And there are times and places when the need to avoid offense becomes absolute; therapy for example cannot proceed if there isn't a completely nonjudgmental environment where people feel safe to express whatever they need to. It's a judgment call.
As far as I'm concerned the proper criteria to use is to always be trying to do as much good as possible while doing as little harm as required. Saying what you need in order to feel safe is a request among friends and fine. Trying to assert dominance over the form of communication used by others is stroking your own damn ego and worthless. Complaining about others making such requests while ignorant about the reality of their needs is, bluntly speaking, damned rude and should be actively avoided. Remember, the objective is to do good. Balance your needs against others' needs and try to find the way that's best.
So anyway, that's my opinion, but I'll loan it out to you if you like it.