Topic: The music taste of your (possible) significant other (Read 18834 times)

yipjumpmusic · « **on:** 08 Apr 2005, 02:49 »

Yes, yet another poll to satisfy my endless curiosity...
Who, when considering someone to ask out/date/get to know better, has similar/good musical taste as an absolute requirement, and who does not? But if so is there an exact science to it or how do you go about deciding what is good enough? Or, is there anyone that is currently with someone who does not have similar/good taste? With this crowd I might dare assume that most have some requirement but maybe you have an interesting past story.

muffy · « **Reply #1 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 06:50 »

While it's not a prerequisuite, it generally warms a guy to me, for two main reasons:
1 - music is important to me, and sad though it may be, it's a large part of who I am. It doesn't have to be the same type of music, but some kind of a passion for it generally helps.
2 - Indie boys generally have fringes or longish hair, making them instantly more attractive, and occassionally couple this with a love of eyeliner. Also, the hyper-sensitive, artsy thing is kinda cool too.
3 - Boys in Bands. I know it's lame, but I can't help going to gigs and being attracted to the guy on stage with a guitar/mic/whatever, and have a rather appalling track record for disasters with people like this.

Case in point - I met the guy I'm currently nurturing an unhealthy crush on when he approached me in my local indie club and started ranting about Bright Eyes. We don't talk about music that often, but it's there as a common ground...

I've just realised that this thread relates to significant others, and I can only talk about it in theory. This is very, very sad.

Banana_Hammock · « **Reply #2 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 06:57 »

Of course it’s important, I more or less listen to music 25 hours a day and if my girlfriend couldn’t stand my music it would definently be a problem…

japaneasy · « **Reply #3 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 07:15 »

I've never actually dated someone who liked the music I liked, at the time I liked it, heh. My last gf was totally into the indie scene, at the time, I hated it. I listened to trance and house mostly. Made road trips an interesting experience. I'm finally coming around to it, a good while after we broke up. Heh.

yggdrasil · « **Reply #4 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 07:48 »

The last girl I went out with doesn't seem very interested in music at all, so she never had any problems with anything I listened to... it would have been nice if she was into the same things as me, but you can't have everything.

KharBevNor · « **Reply #5 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 08:03 »

Yeah, I do. Given that I listen to a goodly bit of extreme and/or ultra-heavy music (especially in other people's perceptions, some people upper heaviness boundary is painfully low) it's kinda essential. When I find the girl to whom 'Matriarch - Black Apples' is the perfect makeout song, I've found the girl for me.

AndSheeWas · « **Reply #6 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 08:14 »

It doesn't matter to me. As long as you can at least tolerate my random bouts of Erasure/Roxette and extended evenings of Byrne and Bowie, I'll put up with just about anything. Except Dave Matthews Band. That is non-negotiable.

nickyandthefuture · « **Reply #7 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 08:22 »

My last girlfriend listened to bluegrass, which drove me up the fucking wall. In general, I think similar music taste is pretty important. I tend to try to get people to listen to the music that I like; if they hate everything I listen to, I can be pretty obnoxious.

yipjumpmusic · « **Reply #8 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 08:27 »

There, while covered in what I actually typed, I changed the title to get a wider scope

daviesmatt · « **Reply #9 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 09:02 »

Identical music taste aint vital, but if I went out with a girl who listened to Britney Spears or similar; teeny-goth crap like Evanescene; or "My dick is bigger than your dick" style hiphop, I would shoot myself. Actually, I just wouldn't go out with her.

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maxusy3k · « **Reply #10 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 09:18 »

Musical taste is a big thing to me, since my music is a big thing to me. My current crush has the perfect balance... loves a lot of the same kind of music as me, but loves bands I haven't heard of / had the time or money to invest in. This gives us a lot of music stuff to talk about while still having a lot in common.

One of my ex girlfriends started out with the same taste as me and then started listening to all kinds of horrible crap. She also ruined a lot of my favourite songs just by listening to them over and over.

amok · « **Reply #11 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 09:52 »

It's not a vital requirement but then my significant other likes all the same stuff as me as well as other stuff I'm new to, so I've never really considered whether it'd be a problem

siobhan · « **Reply #12 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 10:06 »

i think i'd definatly have to be with someone who has a passion for music (and hopefully for a respectable type, if not the same as i like) but who knows that his taste in music is NOT an extension of his penis, someone who could just be mellow about things.. not one of those "OH MY GOD! you don't know {insert band name here}??? what have you been doing? been living under a rock? they're so much better than {insert name of my favorite band here}"

grr... i dislike those people

rynne · « **Reply #13 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 10:15 »

My girlfriend didn't listen to very much music at all when we started going out. The most underground thing she had was Weezer's debut.

That being said, since we started going out, I've turned her on to Radiohead, the Dandy Warhols, PJ Harvey, Aphex Twin, Arcade Fire, etc.

She's even agreed to come with me to the LCD Soundsystem/M.I.A. show in June.

Mnementh · « **Reply #14 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 11:21 »

It isn't hugely important to me, though it is nice if we have similar tastes. I tend to introduce them to a lot of new stuff, and every know and then someone introduces me to something I haven't heard of. For instance, the woman I'm currently interested in has very mainstream tastes, but those tastes mesh with what I like in mainstream music (U2, The Boss, Bon Jovi, etc.)

So I guess my answer is no, it doesn't matter, as long as we don't absolutely hate the others taste.

El Opium · « **Reply #15 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 11:27 »

I've thought about this a lot and I never thought it was possible for girls to like the sort of music I do. Though having gone to a few shows recently I've been pleasently surprised by the male-to-female ratio. Basically my resoloution is that I probably wouldn't date a girl who was obsessive about really mainstream music as I'd have no way to musically relate to her and like it or not I'm kind of a record nerd, thus making music a big part of my life. A girl who's into jam bands asked me for a mix CD yesterday and I'll probably be able to cater to her as I have plenty of Psych-Folk and Psych-Improv that might appeal but if someone who was nuts about the latest nu metal dreck asked me for one I don't know what I'd be able to put on their CD. I could try to have a relationship with them but it would potentially be strained by me listening to music all the time and wanting to run off to small little shows they wouldn't go to.

EhSteve · « **Reply #16 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 11:56 »

I just raided the music collection of the girl I'm currently infatuated with.

Most of it is stuff I acknowledged as decent, but had not had a chance to hear yet, which was awesome.

Decemberists, Bright Eyes, They Might Be Giants, Smashing Pumpkins, Simon and Garfunkel, Dar Williams, Bob Dylan, Bob Marley, Dave Matthews, John Mayer, Jump Little Children, Moby, Jack Johnson, Blues Traveller, Wyclef Jean, Counting Crows, Most of the Weezer albums, Wilco, Jackson Browne, Tom Petty, and Cake, to name a few.

Oh, I am smitten.

My ex just mostly listened to oldies.

I guess the most important thing to me is enjoying a variety of things, and being open minded about listening to new stuff. When I put a CD in with something she's never heard before, it's a bit bewildering to have the person not even attempt to listen to it.

I put a Frank Zappa song on a mix tape I gave my current crush. Even if she didn't necessarily like it, she was amused by it

Tinjessla · « **Reply #17 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 12:01 »

It's not a big thing essentially, but it does play a part. As long as there's some sort of common ground somewhere, thats enough for me. I've introduced my boyfriend to a good few bands/artists and it's fun watching him instantly liking one i recommend to him. I'm still trying to get him to like Bjork though.

That being said, i dooooo loves the long haired, webcomic t-shirt wearin' indie boy look.

ForteBass · « **Reply #18 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 14:34 »

I'll just say this, my other half's taste in music tends to suck.

ev0lve · « **Reply #19 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 14:44 »

I listen to a lot of stuff he doesn't care for, but if he's willing to adapt I'm willing to do the same. He's come to see the Pixies, Ministry, Xiu Xiu, and Ani Difranco with me.. none of which he liked. He doesn't listen to anything too offensive, though. His playlist is mostly Nine Inch Nails, Aphex Twin, Radiohead, and Tori Amos.

I don't think I would exclude someone from being a potential boy/girlfriend just because they listen to shitty music, though it would seem the type of people I'm attracted to aren't the type of people who are into, say.. Britney Spears or Eminem.

happybirthdaygelatin · « **Reply #20 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 14:49 »

Ohhhhhh. Vague statements make me wonder. What's an example?

It's not really a big deal to me. Though some shared interest is pretty nice.

mechorg · « **Reply #21 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 18:48 »

I rate musical taste in a prospective significant other as a very high priority. I can typically tell someone their personality by how they answer the question, "So what kind of music do you listen to?"
Granted, it does not have to be identical or even similar to my tastes, however a respect for any type of music and being tolerate to things you may not like is required.

I love when people listen to different music than I do. I love getting people to listen to new music. But, I want someone that appreciates music enough to be able to sit in silence at night and stare at the sky listening to the newest Boards of Canada release, or be silly and dance to Duran Duran for 80s night at the club, or tolerate a running loop of every single Radiohead song released because I'm having a bad day. I don't believe this is too hard to ask for...

Kai · « **Reply #22 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 19:52 »

Quote from: EhSteve

I put a Frank Zappa song on a mix tape I gave my current crush. Even if she didn't necessarily like it, she was amused by it

Here's your problem; The mix tape wasn't full of Zappa songs. If it was she'd be making out with you right now.*

*Or she'd hate your guts.

BUt anyways, I really don't think I could go out with someone who didn't A. have any specific taste in music. B. Listens to rap/hip hop/etc., simply because those who do I've found tend to loathe every other genre of music. C. Those who completely despise the music I listen to. If they just haven't heard of it, that's fine, cause it's always fun to introduce people to things.

ForteBass · « **Reply #23 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 20:56 »

Quote from: happybirthdaygelatin

Ohhhhhh. Vague statements make me wonder. What's an example?

Motley Crue...

Kai · « **Reply #24 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 20:59 »

Is it possible to even like someone who enjoys Motley Crue? Jesus.

ForteBass · « **Reply #25 on:** 08 Apr 2005, 21:16 »

Eh, I do love her, so I can look beyond that whole crap music thing. I'll bring her around eventually.

KharBevNor · « **Reply #26 on:** 09 Apr 2005, 04:55 »

Quote from: mechorg

I love when people listen to different music than I do. I love getting people to listen to new music. But, I want someone that appreciates music enough to be able to sit in silence at night and stare at the sky listening to the newest Boards of Canada release, or be silly and dance to Duran Duran for 80s night at the club, or tolerate a running loop of every single Radiohead song released because I'm having a bad day. I don't believe this is too hard to ask for...

Well, you wouldn't pull me.

And what's wrong with the Crue?

Sixleaf · « **Reply #27 on:** 10 Apr 2005, 21:11 »

On my second or so date with my now boyfriend he confessed that he broke up with a girl due to a mixed CD that she gave him. I was paranoid because he listens to really obscure stuff (as in, I still haven't a clue what he's listening to half the time) and at the time I was still listening to what was popular on the radio in the late 90's early 00's.

A couple weeks ago he asked me to make him a mix CD and I was planning on avoiding it completely but he gave me blank CDs and asked about it continually, so finally I had to put something together. Today he said, "I forgot to tell you how much I love the CD you made me!" Aww. Huge sigh of relief, too.

Druid · « **Reply #28 on:** 10 Apr 2005, 23:12 »

That's pretty extreme to break up over a mix tape.

Music compatibility is kind of an issue. Music is a big part of my life, and I'm kind of opinionated about it.

Neutral and open usually seems the best fit, at least where I live. Indie peeps are rare, so I meet lots of Top40 Rock fans who I promptly alienate when the subject comes up by mentioning that their favorite bands are awful and mainstream hip-hoppers who aren't interested.

"I could never date someone who has a bad record collection." - High Fidelity (I think)

yipjumpmusic · « **Reply #29 on:** 10 Apr 2005, 23:13 »

Hmm I bet it was. (sixleaf)

The Engine Driver · « **Reply #30 on:** 10 Apr 2005, 23:52 »

I think it's important that we have at least a bit in common.

Her favorites are Elliott Smith, Sleater-Kinney, REM, Quasi, Moby.

Mine are Elliott Smith, The Decemberists, Belle & Sebastian, Wilco, Corrina Repp, Quasi, Modest Mouse, among others.

She seems to dig most of the stuff I've introduced her to, though.

I couldn't have a long term relationship with someone who was listening to crap like Good Charlotte or Stain'd or any of that modern rock radio bullshit.

muffy · « **Reply #31 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 00:05 »

Dude! My mate's band supported Quasi last night in London!
And they're supporting Sleater Kinney soon...
(That mate would be the guy I like but have done nothing about...)

LightThievesAll · « **Reply #32 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 07:55 »

I had a girlfriend who was quasi-pretentious and very much into bad indie rock and, uh, "deep" I guess mainstream rock. This did not mesh well with my punk and metal sensibilities, however, there was a give and take and we managed quite contentedly. As a direct result of that relationship I cannot tolerate Dave Matthew's Band even to a degree.

Also, for some reason, I never get involved with subculture girls. Don't know why. The current girl I carry a torch for is a recovering hippie, but she likes 60's skinhead reggae and Black Sabbath, so we can hang out peacefully.

Note: to the ladies, never, NEVER scream "don't get hurt!" as your boyfriend leaps into a circle pit, because he will be the de facto punching bag for several songs.

yipjumpmusic · « **Reply #33 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 08:20 »

LightThievesAll, oh geez I can imagine it *holds back laugh* eh, sorry
If it was on a show it'd be funny but probably not fun in real life...

dannyboy · « **Reply #34 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 14:28 »

Quote from: LightThievesAll

Note: to the ladies, never, NEVER scream "don't get hurt!" as your boyfriend leaps into a circle pit, because he will be the de facto punching bag for several songs.

Truer words were never spoken my friend.

As for the gf... she listens to *country* though she's starting to like indie music a lot more. She just recently asked me to burn a copy of my Shins and Arcade Fire albums for her to keep at her desk at work, and she *loves* the Decemberists (I took her to her first show ever where they played phenominally), so it's at least getting better. And whenever I try to say that country sucks she reminds me of Iron and Wine and The Fruit Bats... both of whom I love immensely.

mookers · « **Reply #35 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 15:53 »

aaaaah her musical taste is AWESOME.

Les Savy Fav, Xiu Xiu, Pavement, Cursive, The Good Life, Sigur Ros, Azure Ray, Now It's Overhead, Tilly and The Wall, SAY HI TO YOUR MOM, holy god. i love this girl.

i introduced her to say hi to your mom on the mix cd i gave her (which also contained a .txt asking her out. because i am super.)

the only thing she likes that threw me off entirely is Propaghandi.. she spazzed out about it and sent me a track and i couldn't dig it at all.. but that's nothing. this girl is great.

muffy · « **Reply #36 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 16:18 »

Hell, I'd date you rgirlfriend on those grounds. Except she's taken, obviously...

happybirthdaygelatin · « **Reply #37 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 16:24 »

Quote from: ForteBass

Quote from: happybirthdaygelatin
Ohhhhhh. Vague statements make me wonder. What's an example?

Motley Crue...

Heh. I like Shout at the Devil but that is about it.

Sixleaf · « **Reply #38 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 20:31 »

Quote from: Druid

That's pretty extreme to break up over a mix tape.

I should point out that he claims that it was a "last straw" thing that ended a not-so-good relationship.

yipjumpmusic · « **Reply #39 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 20:33 »

ah ok, well that seems better.

Sixleaf · « **Reply #40 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 20:43 »

Yeah. Anyway, mostly I like what my boyfriend plays, but he and his best friend really like this subsubgenre called ghettotech. IE: DJ Assault. I have heard "Ass 'n Titties" so many times it's not even funny.

Oerdin · « **Reply #41 on:** 11 Apr 2005, 20:48 »

My girlfriend is gaw-gaw for the 80's which suits me fine since I also like 80's and she puts up with my music when I play it.

emor · « **Reply #42 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 01:07 »

So this girl, I think she likes me, but she's even more shy and introverted than me, we exhchanged mixtapes. She liked mine and hers was full of old school punk on vinyl! I'm not sure I like this girl back in a romantic way though. I would like to be her friend, but then she listens to such cool music! This other girl I think likes me (at the very least mutual friends are pushing a hookup) seems to like only Jay Z and Ludicrous, which turns me off more than I'd like to admit.

that's what my brain does sometimes. Most other times I think of cool mixtapes to give to all the pretty girls I have crushes on. There's like three per class. But I'm so shy and introverted and I can't even look at them. Boo hoo.

Druid · « **Reply #43 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 02:01 »

Quote from: Sixleaf

I should point out that he claims that it was a "last straw" thing that ended a not-so-good relationship.

Ok, that's much more reasonable.

Druid · « **Reply #44 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 02:08 »

Quote from: dannyboy

As for the gf... she listens to *country* though she's starting to like indie music a lot more.

I've always thought that Indie has a little bit of a country streak in it. I blame the Americana movement.

I can understand her liking the Decemberists. I thought that they were pretty country when I heard some of their stuff.

yipjumpmusic · « **Reply #45 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 02:12 »

Well, not to continue to move off topic, though I guess it is, but indie is kind of varied in musical style but of course part of that is country influenced, with the loverly twang

dannyboy · « **Reply #46 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 07:26 »

Quote from: yipjumpmusic

indie is kind of varied in musical style but of course part of that is country influenced, with the loverly twang

True, in a sense, which is why she always brings that point up. I'll be the first to admit that a lot of the bands I like are "country" in the sense that they lean more heavily towards folk rock and use banjos or slide guitars, but let's not make such a broad statement or we'll end up saying The Faint are country too.

And my only gripe about the country side of her is that she likes songs like Sven writes...

Skibas_clavicle · « **Reply #47 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 07:54 »

Quote from: muffy

Dude! My mate's band supported Quasi last night in London!
And they're supporting Sleater Kinney soon...
(That mate would be the guy I like but have done nothing about...)

Make your move, girl! That's teh hotness!

Music's definately a big deal for me. It makes a big factor in whether I like guy or not. My last fling thing was with this guy who I talked to about the dismemberment plan, wilco and built to spill for 35 minutes about. HAWT. Too bad he lives in Chicago. Also, this guy I just met last weekend and I talked about underground hip-hop and Weezer for a long time. It's always nice to find people who like what you do since I don't know too many people with my musical tastes.

But its not totally imperative, I suppose. My exboyfriend was into a lot of metal and industrial (ministry, jack off jill, etc.) and my exgirlfriend loved techno and rave music, so it's all good.

muffy · « **Reply #48 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 08:01 »

Quote from: Skibas_clavicle

Make your move, girl! That's teh hotness!

Haha...I sort of did. It sort of backfired.
Damn.
And now I'm being sort of emo about it now.

ALL I WANT IS A SWEET GUY I CAN GO TO GIGS WITH, DAMNIT!
Ok, done being emo.
As you were.

thehoopiestfrood · « **Reply #49 on:** 12 Apr 2005, 16:02 »

Music can help you meet or get to know someone and break the ice and whatnot but as long as they are tolerant and open minded it doesn't really matter to me what music someone likes. Of course it's nice to share interests but it's not essential. However if you try and tell me I can't ever listen to any of my "crappy CDs" in my own house while you are there you can get to fuck.

THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

Author Topic: The music taste of your (possible) significant other (Read 18834 times)

yipjumpmusic

Banana_Hammock

japaneasy

yggdrasil

AndSheeWas

yipjumpmusic

daviesmatt

siobhan

Mnementh

El Opium

Tinjessla

ev0lve

mechorg

Sixleaf

Druid

yipjumpmusic

The Engine Driver

yipjumpmusic

dannyboy

mookers

Sixleaf

yipjumpmusic

Sixleaf

emor

Druid

Druid

yipjumpmusic

dannyboy

thehoopiestfrood