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Favourite quotes
Dr. ROFLPWN:
The Monarch: You're probably thinking: "why am I here?" You're here because you done fucked up one too many times!!! You all think you're hot shit in a champagne glass, but you're really cold diarrhea in a Dixie cup! And if you keep up like you've been doing, this is where you're headed!
(A gangsta-looking kid laughs)
The Monarch: Oh, this is funny to you, right? Because you're so fuckin' bad? I know your type. You think 'I'll just get me a costume, rip off the neighborhood kids'. Next thing you know, you've got a jet shaped like a skull with lasers on the front!!!
Other Kid: This is totally gay.
The Monarch: Think this is gay, huh?! Is that what you fuckin' said, you scrawny little piece of shit? Oh, this isn't gay. But King Gorilla over there is! And I bet he can't wait to break off a piece of your dick in his ass!
(King Gorilla smacks his lips as iff blowing a kiss. The Monarch stalks over to Dean and grabs his shirt collar, pulling him up as he rants)
The Monarch: You there! Get up! I SAID GET THE FUCK UP! What's your name?
Dean Venture: Dean Ven--
The Monarch: Your name is BITCH! AND I OWN YOU! You are PROPERTY! And when I have tired of having sex with every hole God drilled in your slender frame...King Gorilla! Got a cigarette?
(takes the cig and pushes Dean into King's arms)
There! I just sold you for the price of a cigarette! AND I DON'T SMOKE!
(pauses, realizing something)
Holy shit. You're Dean fucking Venture! Uh, King, I'mma need my bitch back. Here's your cigarette?
King Gorilla: FUCK YOU! Gimme a dollar!
While that is by far the best exchange one can find from The Venture Bros., half the entire show is almost as quotable. It's a beautiful thing.
rae:
A man may fight for many things. His country, his friends, his principles, the glistening ear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally, I'd mud-wrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock and a sack of French porn.
I love Blackadder.
ImRonBurgundy?:
"Douche chiiiiiill" -Dr. Tobias Fünke
Johnny C:
"I just blue myself."
mysteriousbriefcase:
chuck palahniuk has some pretty awesome quotes. nothing really funny, but i like them.
"Maybe humans are just the pet alligators that God flushed down the toilet."
"We all die. The goal isn't to live forever. The goal is to create something that will."
"The best way to waste your life, ... is by taking notes. The easiest way to avoid living is to just watch. Look for the details. Report. Don't participate."
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