Fun Stuff > CHATTER
Best/Worst things to say during sex?
gritxviet:
Ahaha the only reason I signed up to the forum is to reply to this thread.
So I'm thinking we definitely need a Harry Potter one so...:
"Oh Harry! Cast that spell on me with your wand!"
And of course there's:
"It's really distracting how much you look like your mom/dad"
"I WANNA GET OFF THE RIDE! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!"
"I really feel bad about putting that in your drink..."
"This is probably a bad time to tell you but... I clogged your toilet"
"FREE THE BEAST!"
[After sex]"I charge $5 a minute so that'll be... $3"
snubnose:
ROTFL
Found a collection at http://www.unmoralische.de/ (german site, sorry). Best ones:
- Can you wake me when you're finished with this ?
- Please stop wheezing
- But I've just brushed my teeth !
- Besides, did I mention my webcam ?
- Its so nice to have sex with a woman you dont have to pump up first !
- Hopefully you still look that good once I'm sober
- You're almost as good as my ex
- I think I better masturbate instead
- You're so good, you could be a professional
- With more people it would be more fun
- Have I mentioned my grandma died in this bed ?
- Could you please put a paper bag over your head ?
- Please make coffee... or cant you do that either ?
- My mother was better at that ...
- Besides, wheres the remote control for the tv ?
- Please dont take my laughter personal - everyone looks funny when naked
- Oh, besides, you're my first - for today.
- You're remembering me of that prostitute ...
- Strange. So much fat but still no titts.
- Have I mentioned why I was in prison for twenty years ? (Remember, its germany. No, theres no death penalty here !)
- Dont shake so much, I want to drink my beer !
- Oh wait a moment, I need to visit the bathroom (errm more vulgar - but I only know the nice british way to say that in english)
- HA ! And another infected !
- Ready ! Next please ...
- One more wiskey... I'm not drunk enough for this yet.
- May I open my eyes again ?
- Congratulations, you're the 1000th woman I slept with !
- Can we just be friends ?
- Sorry - have we started ?
Krulla:
"I've got AIDS"
umcloud:
The worst I can think of is: once you start getting into it, start calling out your own name. Simple, elegant, completely hilarious.
NothingIncorporated:
"Your dad taught me this way...and your mum taught me this way..and they BOTH taught me THIS way"
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