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Political survey, how fun! (homework help plz)

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Dissy:
Name, first and last: Kevin "James T." Kirk (Just got it legally changed)
Age: 21
State: Not a state, rather the large military base that sits between Arizona and Texas

1. Did you vote in the last election? Yes
2. Are you going to vote in November? Yes
3. What candidate are you going to vote for, and why? McCain, cause we need a Cylon president
4. What party do you belong to, and why? Independent
5. What is your stance on illegal immigration? We should invade Mexico and Canada and make them states of our own
6. What do you think the next president can do to improve the economy? Stop sending jobs "overseas"
7. Do you believe it is beneficial to vote? Why or why not? Sure, why not?
8. What is the electoral college, and should it be retained or abolished? Why or why not? A bunch of old men (and women) who got elected my the masses, who are then told who to vote for to be president.  And thus far its the best we've got, so keep it until someone comes along wih a better idear
9. How do you decide whom to vote for? Number of Mechanical implants
10. Do you believe campaign spending undermines the honesty of a campaign? Why or why not? No, cause you can;t have a serious campaign without money
11. Should campaign advertising be regulated, and if so, how? Why or why not? Why should I give a rat's ass, I nver see any of it anyways
12. Should the government try to give people more incentive to vote? If so, how? o
13. Is voter ignorance harming the process of democracy? Yes, people only look at what is being said today, not listening o what was said yesterday, last week, or 30 years ago.

Barmymoo:
Guys, I think this thread would be better left to die before it starts breaking rules and getting locked. OP, nice idea for getting a good spread of people but politics is a big no in this forum.

Verergoca:
Name, first and last: Dude Surveys Are Supposed To Be Anonymous.
Age: Older than methusalem
StateProvince: Zeeland

1. Did you vote in the last election?
Yesh.
2. Are you going to vote in November?
No idea, i think the waterboard is having elections then.
3. What candidate are you going to vote for, and why?
No idea, because i havent oriented myself on party programs yet.
4. What party do you belong to, and why?
I do not belong to a specific party, due to not giving a crap
5. What is your stance on illegal immigration?
The problem is not in my country, way to solve is to make it so that people do not want to leave theirs. You will have a very good reason before you take your chances doing this.
6. What do you think the next president can do to improve the economy?
President? We have a Prime Minister! Consittutional Monarchy ftw!
7. Do you believe it is beneficial to vote? Why or why not?
Well, duh. It is the way in which you as a citizen are able to directly influence what happens in the coming x years.
8. What is the electoral college, and should it be retained or abolished? Why or why not?
Who?
9. How do you decide whom to vote for?
Read all the bazillion party programs, kieswijzer.nl, and reading assorted texts the politicians have said the last 4 years.
10. Do you believe campaign spending undermines the honesty of a campaign? Why or why not?
"campaign spending" is to vague of a definition. A campaign needs money to be spent, else you know, you as a politician wont be able to actually reach the people who you try to convince to vote for you.
11. Should campaign advertising be regulated, and if so, how? Why or why not?
As long as it doesnt fall into outright buying of votes, its all good.
12. Should the government try to give people more incentive to vote? If so, how?
What, if people dont care enough to vote, why should they be allowed to complain about policies?
13. Is voter ignorance harming the process of democracy?
No, please keep the idiots out. Populistic politicians, with one or two main issues suck donkeyballs.
Yes, its very nice you care about animals, or whatever, but i would like to be informed on your international policy, healthcareplans, economic ideas and all that jazz.

KharBevNor:
Name, first and last

THE GRIMLY FROSTBITTEN NECROWIZARD

Age

ANCIENT BEYOND THE KEN OF A LUKEWARM POSER SUCH AS YOU

State

THE VERY VERY VERY VERY FORSAKEN SLOPES OF THE NORTHERN MOUNTAIN

1. Did you vote in the last election?

NO BUT I DID SODOMISE THE POSERCHRIST ON THE CLOUDED FROST SPIRE OF ANAXAGAZAROTH

2. Are you going to vote in November?

NOVEMBER IS TOO LUKEWARM AND POSERISH A MONTH. I SHALL VOTE WHEN THE SNOWS OF ETERNAL WINTER COVER THE DYING EARTH AND THE HUES OF SUNLIGHT CEASE TO DANCE ON THE TREMBLING FACES OF THE WEAK.

3. What candidate are you going to vote for, and why?

SATAN. BECAUSE SATAAAAAAAN.

4. What party do you belong to, and why?

PARTY? NO MOSH! NO CORE! NO FUN!

5. What is your stance on illegal immigration?

ALL IMPURE CHRISTIAN INFLUENCES MUST BE CLEANSED FROM THE ULTIMATE NORTH BY THE ETERNAL FLAME OF GREAT SATAN.

6. What do you think the next president can do to improve the economy?

SODOMISE MORE NUNS.

7. Do you believe it is beneficial to vote? Why or why not?

VOTING WILL NOT SAVE YOUR SOUL FROM BEING DEVOURED BY THE ULTIMATE DARKNESS OF SATANS FURY. SO NO.

8. What is the electoral college, and should it be retained or abolished? Why or why not?

THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE? ISN'T THAT SOME FUNK BAND? FUNK IS LUKEWARM AND POSERISH.

9. How do you decide whom to vote for?

I GAZE INTO THE FROSTBITTEN CAULDRON OF THE NECROWITCH. THEN I DECIDE RANDOMLY.

10. Do you believe campaign spending undermines the honesty of a campaign? Why or why not?

SATAN.

11. Should campaign advertising be regulated, and if so, how? Why or why not?

SATAN?

12. Should the government try to give people more incentive to vote? If so, how?

VOTING IS A DUTY NOT A RIGHT. IT SHOULD BE MADE MANDATORY AND A 'NONE OF HE ABOVE' OPTION ADDED TO THE BALLOTS FOR THOSE DISSATISFIED WITH THE STATE OF POLITICS. LEGAL SANCTIONS SHOULD BE USED AGAINST THOSE WHO DO NOT VOTE.

13. Is voter ignorance harming the process of democracy?

SATAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

Jesus Christ:
Name, first and last
Here comes a Special Christ! (Jesus Christ, Saviour of Man) (I assumed you wanted my official title as well.)

Age
2008 (I am pretty old!)

State
Bliss (I always am.)

1. Did you vote in the last election?
No (I was busy sitting by my father's right hand, you see.)

2. Are you going to vote in November?
No (I will still be busy sitting by my father's right hand.)

3. What candidate are you going to vote for, and why?
McCain is a true Christian (Obama and Hillary have entered a pact of unholiness by Doing It after debates. I have seen them.)

4. What party do you belong to, and why?
I belong to all parties (that makes me everybody's best friend!)

5. What is your stance on illegal immigration?
We should let them come on over (as long as they accept Me as their true lord and saviour.)

6. What do you think the next president can do to improve the economy?
He should pray more (the American economy is directly influenced by the amount of Presidential Prayers we receive.)

7. Do you believe it is beneficial to vote? Why or why not?
I do not believe, I know (I am pretty close to my father, and he does have a fair bit of influence in these matters, after all!)

8. What is the electoral college, and should it be retained or abolished? Why or why not?
ELECTORAL COLLAGES ARE THE WORK OF SATAN (but you can still be a good Christian and attend, it is not your fault SATAN HAS FUCKED THE PRINCIPAL SEVERAL TIMES WITH HIS BIG, SCALY PENIS.)

9. How do you decide whom to vote for?
I decide who wins (so I do not need to have an opinion!)

10. Do you believe campaign spending undermines the honesty of a campaign? Why or why not?
That depends on whether or not the money has been blessed by a vicar (preferrably The Pope.)

11. Should campaign advertising be regulated, and if so, how? Why or why not?
Let them hang their posters I say, they have no effect in the long run (trust me on this one)

12. Should the government try to give people more incentive to vote? If so, how?
Pray more (really, it helps! I prwomise!)

13. Is voter ignorance harming the process of democracy?
Whoever has the most dedicated Christian followers wins the election (Sharpen up, North-Americans! Your fellow humans down south have not delved into depravity and filth as of yet! Not as much as a single condom! If I weren't Jesus Christ your Lord and Saviour I would say they are better humans than you! Don't force dad to pull a Gomorrah on you, last time he was really choked up about killing those hundreds and hundreds of people literally for days.)

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