Right then bitches, let's have a little bit of thread necro, eh? Lately, I've been living like a student without actually being one. This means simple, tastyish meals which are quick and tastyish.
Get ready for some bandwith fucking.
Right people, first things first, get a kitchen. Here is a prime example of a kitchen:
Next up, blast out some cooking music through iTunes or another cool kid approved media player. My weapon of choice is some Starfucker.
Hell Yeah.
Next up, put that bitching kettle on.
Now that that water is all boiled and shit, put it in a pan.
And turn that stove on like your prom date (except no backstreet abortion is necessary here!)
Now, you don't have to be specific, but I find 65g of wholegrain rice to be enough for me.
Bam.
And when the water looks like this:
Pour that rice in there. Bitch won't know what hit it.
Now, as you can see, I have a prime collection of mackeral here. I'm only using mackeral because fish is fucking delicious. To be honest, you can top this dish with any shit. Just make sure it's saucy, otherwise you'll get hench drymouth. Plus sauce is always awesome.
I'm also gonna slap some cheese in on this business. I'm going with Tescos own 'Mexican Pepper and Jalapeno Cheese', as modelled by Akaya the Magnificent.
You gotta' test that rice (unless you're an experience rice boiler).
Now it's not quite ready yet, so here's a tour of my Bitchin' Kitchen.
Here's the dishes.
Here's a rabbit.
Here's an Aussie Rules Ball.
Oh shit the rice
Get a sieve.
Sieve that rice.
Awh yeah.
Slap that cheese on whilst the rice is still hot, man.
That shit is better
melted.
Now open that fish up.
Don't tell me that shit doesn't look appetizing. I bet your salivating just looking at it, you fish hussy you.
Mmm, look at that spicy tomato sauce.
Tip that shit out.
And bam, there goes the fish.
Oh yeah, doesn't that shit look awesome? Don't you just wanna grab a spoon and drive it through your monitor?
Well, pick your weapon, man.
Personally, I'd pick this thing.
Looks like Jimmy Neutron but...
BAM! That shit's a spoon.
I'm gonna' go with a normal spoon though, because my parents think I'm weird enough taking pictures whilst I eat.
I'll slap on some Top Gear on Dave.
And bam, food's gone.
And looks how satisfied that left me.
Until next time, folks.