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[calenlass]

You people are insane.


Also I like that some people replied to the article from the Onion seriously.

[Katherine]

Hrm.  That age/2 + 7 thing just is not right.  I am 30, and there is no way in hell I could date a 22 year old.

[evernew]

It's not the Standard Rule Of That's Okay but the Standard Rule Of Creepiness.
If your potential mate is above x/2 + 7 then it's not creepy. Doesn't mean it's alright for you either.

Speaking of weird endings ... looks like mine just got into overtime.
My ex was mad at me for being so unaffected by our break-up because I didn't jump at the chance to meet her when I came back home.
So I told her "okay, come by my house tomorrow" (I can't go out, debilitating injury, no car, long story, other threads).
So she came by yesterday and we fucked.
Not much else.
She's leaving to go to university today or tomorrow and I could not care much less. I guess I'm still pretty unaffected.

[Jimmy the Squid]

My girlfriend was 17 when we met and still in highschool. At that point I was in my third year of university while she was just about to start her high school exams and I found it a little weird. As soon as she turned 18 I was instantaneously fine with the age gap and we started going out (we had been sleeping together for a few months though I had reservations about it). I think the whole age difference thing is a case by case thing because I know some couples who have had a significant difference in their ages and it never worked out well for exactly that reason. On the other hand I also know couples who have a pretty large age gap and honestly I can't think people who are better suited to each other so I don't think it is generally a hard and fast rule.

[onewheelwizzard]

When I was 18 or 19 (can't quite remember) my best friend (who was also the girl I lost my virginity to a year or two previously), who was 17, started dating a 26-year-old.  I got kinda sketched out about it at first but then I met the guy and hung out with him for a while and realized that they were actually a pretty good fit for each other, given where they each were in their lives.  I chalked it up to my friend being a really exceptionally cool girl who could hang out with people a decade older than her without any problems.  After that I kinda cooled down on the issue and nowadays, especially now that I'm 21, I'm kinda indifferent.  I'd date a 17-year-old if she was interesting enough.  The last woman who initiated a relationship with me was 32.  Age is more or less irrelevant for some people and I think I've become one of them.

[MrBlu]

8th grade, girl I met during sleep-away camp
we had been dating for a few weeks when this happened over the phone:

her: do you want to see titanic?
me: didn't you already see it?
her: yeah, twice, do you want to go?
me: not really
her: well, in that case I don't want to be with you any more :hangs up:

still haven't seen titanic

Nice...

Omg, wasn't I JUST being routed by you in Tribes: Vengeance multiplayer?

[Barmymoo]

the Onion

It has taken several days for this detail to permeate.

[apieceofmind]

i'm rather amused by the titanic story.

i once woke up to my phone vibrating. i had recieved a breakup text from a boyfriend who did not have texting at the time. this guy is still my friend, so i occasionaly make fun of him for this.

[Bayley]

At least it wasn't "I want you to hit me as hard as you can."

i loll'ed so hard at this. i am still laughing.

[nobo]

Omg, wasn't I JUST being routed by you in Tribes: Vengeance multiplayer?

Couldn't have been me. I don't really play video games :-/

[Cicero]

Eh, I've had a few.   One bad blow job ruined about a year relationship of mine.   I ended it there when she couldn't keep up with the good chewin'.

[MrBlu]

Omg, wasn't I JUST being routed by you in Tribes: Vengeance multiplayer?

Couldn't have been me. I don't really play video games :-/

Man, how many people are running around with the name "nobo"...?

[nobo]

I have no clue. It is a childhood nickname that my folks gave me over 20 years ago. the rest of them are imposters.

there is also a lingerie brand NoBo for NO BOundaries.

[Inlander]

Whoa, for a moment there I misread that and thought you said "lingerie band". I was thinking "What is this exciting new musical genre, and how do I get involved in its scene?"

[Bayley]

Of course, there was also that one guy - I thought he loved me for my money, but he really loved me for my brand new leopard-skin pill-box hat. It sadly did not work out.

I love you because I'm actually so gay for Bobby that that love extends to you by association. Let's date.

[parm]

8th grade, girl I met during sleep-away camp
we had been dating for a few weeks when this happened over the phone:

her: do you want to see titanic?
me: didn't you already see it?
her: yeah, twice, do you want to go?
me: not really
her: well, in that case I don't want to be with you any more :hangs up:

still haven't seen titanic

Lucky escape.

[nobo]

As a 13 year old I was devastated. the girl that came after her though was just insane, but the break up wasn't too weird with her.

[Josefbugman]

Weirdest ending of a relationship that wasn't mine:

Last year was my first year of university, I went up with one of my friends from school, a man named James. James himself was never good with girls but he manages to get a girl within the first week of uni, I point out to him that it probably isn't going to last, but I think he didn't listen. Within the week he comes round to my flat heartbroken that the girl has broken things off with him. So we sit and drink whiskey while he goes off on lng rants and then he delivers something that is possibly the greatest backhand compliment I have ever heard, he turns to me and says "I envy you Rob, you don't have to worry about girls" and I say "oh yeah, because I am unattractive" and he says "no don't worry rob, its not your looks its your personality that puts girls off".

[Fenriswolf]

Actually I sort of have one. I was sleeping with a Canadian dude, and we had quite a strong connection but it certainly wasn't monogamous. Despite this, when he went away for a month and I ended up spending two weeks of that sleeping with another guy from our kickboxing club I felt pretty bad telling him. We decided to try monogamy, sort of. After a couple of weeks I started obsessing about the other guy (grass is always greener?) and had to tell him it wasn't working.

But the other guy was twice my age (I was 18, he was 36) so I never planned on a relationship. In short, the weirdness was that there was an overlap where I wasn't seeing either of them but was sleeping with both of them, and they both knew this. Missed out on a threesome (er, 4-some?) with the younger guy and two hot Swedish chicks though! What makes this stranger in retrospect is we all trained together 6 days a week, and when I was supposed to be having my first fight (fell through damn it) William was driving, I was in the back snuggling with Matt, and I shared William's hotel room.

I've now been exclusive with William for over 5 years so so much for "not planning on a relationship". lol

[morca007]

Birthday.

[Ballard]

You got broken up with on your birthday?

Shit, that's awful.

[Cartilage Head]

 I have recently been broken up with for reasons that are probably never going to be made clear to me.

[glyphic]

I had a high school girlfriend who I tried to continue dating when we went to college. We were together for years. Lost our virginity together, blah blah blah. We went to separate colleges and neither of us had cars. We would still meet up on weekends when we could, blah blah blah. Fast forward two months:

She got engaged to the guy she was apparently cheating on me with.

Yeah. Yeah.

They're still married. Unhappily, I hear.

[onewheelwizzard]

I just got broken up with a couple days ago ... it wasn't too weird, I guess.  We're still very much friends, but being together put a fair amount of strain on her (I am exceptionally bad at a couple things that she's exceptionally sensitive to) so she needed to step back a bit.   Basically the issue was that when we were together she'd get really upset at me about things that we both agree are (a) fairly petty and ultimately not worth a whole lot of her anger and (b) inexcusably, aggravatingly simple and should ultimately be really easy for me to avoid.  Since she can't seem to not get angry at these things, and I can't seem to change them, and we both recognize what's going on, it only makes sense not to put too much strain on ourselves for the sake of staying together.  The way I tell the story, it was only her needlessly being upset that caused me trouble, and the way she tells it, it was only my failure to do what should've been simple that caused her trouble ... so knowing each others' stories, keeping the relationship going would've been a poor plan.

Now I just want some sex.  I know guys often feel like they need to avoid being "the guy who just wants sex" but sometimes it's just true.  It's not that I don't care who I fuck, I definitely don't want to have sex with someone I don't care about, but as someone who knows several people who I care about a great deal and who I am quite attracted to, I also have to be clear with those people (if the issue of a sexual relationship comes up) that prioritizing "sex with someone I care about" is only what it is and nothing more.

[Ballard]

Reading your posts reinforces a lot of what I've come to realize on my own lately. I've made too many mistakes catering to others out of a false sense of martyrdom and absolutely no good has come out of it in the long term. The minute I started putting my health and happiness above that of others is the minute I stopped unfairly demanding things of my friends and acquaintances to make up for the deficiencies that I brought upon myself. I no longer feel lonely or emotionally unsatisfied/unrewarded (as much) and I've been able to grow into a person who is happy to work on himself rather than be envious of others. I no longer feel inadequate because I am not the person I look up to. Instead, I realize that every person is an individual just like I am, admit that I am never going to be them, and instead see positive qualities which I could learn from.

Basically what I am trying to say is dude you're awesome.

[onewheelwizzard]

The minute I started putting my health and happiness above that of others is the minute I stopped unfairly demanding things of my friends and acquaintances to make up for the deficiencies that I brought upon myself.

BAM  ::image of Wayne Coyne high-fiving the Dalai Lama::

Fuck, that felt good to hear.

[Ballard]

You know what's funny? I think preaching what you want to practice helps you truly believe it.

A lot of my new found confidence was mostly theoretical until I started giving advice to slightly younger friends and it worked for them. It took a lot of self-determination to not just say "I am lying to make myself feel better! All of this is a pipe dream and I'm doomed to be lame 'cause I wasn't born one of the cool people."

In the same way, you're probably working your ass off to convince yourself of all the stuff you post here on the subject, and writing it down is a form of self-therapy that helps you define your beliefs with a clear mind.

Correct me if I'm totally wrong.

[onewheelwizzard]

I totally know where you're coming from ... I don't really act like I believe a lot of the stuff I say until I start saying it to more and more people.  Sometimes I tell myself it's because the drive to "practice what I preach" is great enough that just vocalizing it is enough to motivate me, sometimes I tell myself it's because every time I say stuff I'm talking to someone different and I have to come up with a new way of saying it (which requires coming up with a new way to think about it and therefore develops my understanding of my own beliefs), sometimes I tell myself it's because acting like I know what I'm talking about is the only way to actually get there.  I don't know or care if there's more or less truth to any of these, because the fact is that it works!  If I actually verbally talk to people about the stuff that I care about in my life, and the changes I'm trying to make in it, those changes happen faster and more smoothly and it makes more sense to me to care about those things.

I don't consider my posting here to be self-therapy, because that would imply that there's something I really want to change in myself.  Right now I'm really comfortable with who I am.  This forum, for me, is a place for me to kick around ideas that appeal to me and see how much they make sense and where it might take me if I were to implement them further in my life.  Once my attention is caught on something (like the idea of a demurrage-based money system, or the idea of being more self-serving in personal relationships, or the idea of going out of your way to be as transparent as possible to the people around you, all things that I've debated at length in the DISCUSS forum), this is a great place for me to play with it and figure out where it leads and what I'll run up against if I really take it to heart and make it a permanent (or at least long-term) part of myself.  It's not that I'm trying to convince myself that anything I say here is true, it's that I'm trying to figure out what will happen if I do convince myself of these things, what I'll be sacrificing by doing so, and how it'll benefit me.

[DonInKansas]

I caught my ex-girlfriend cheating on me with her ex.  I knocked on the door of her house after seeing his truck in her driveway and she answered the door in his t-shirt and nothing else.

After briefly considering retrieving the softball bat in my trunk and battering him with it, I thought better of it and left after some choice words.

Unfortunately, I had forgotten I left my CD case in her car--It had 350ish CDs in it.

She was so pissed that she got caught that she took a hammer to each and every one of my CDs.  Then dropped off the garbage bag on my porch the next day.

Classy.  I guess that's what I get for dating a stripper.....:p

God that was a long time ago, thinking back.

[onewheelwizzard]

What exactly was she pissed about?  That you'd yelled at her over cheating on you?

[Masterbainter]

When I caught a girl cheating redhanded she tried kicking me in the balls.. and I wasn't even yelling at her.. I just told her that I wasn't really surprised.  Females just can't stand it when they get caught.

edit: forgot to add..Broke my 32" TV, Video Camea and Cell phone.  not much I could do because I knew if I tried anything i'd be the one in jail.

[Ballard]

What? Why? She messed with your property and you didn't do anything about it?

[Cicero]

Cheaters are low lifes.

[Masterbainter]

What? Why? She messed with your property and you didn't do anything about it?

Oh, I pressed charges and she was arrested.

But I didn't dare try to stop her.  As all she would have to do is say that I touched her and I'd get battery.  I know the law is suppose to go both ways.. but it's bullshit and doesn't.

[Ballard]

That is total shit. I'm sorry man.

[Masterbainter]

Don't be.  I learned so much from my past relationships.  There is no victims, only volunteers.  Just remember that.

[pwhodges]

Please don't try that line when rape is being discussed.

[Masterbainter]

Please don't try that line when rape is being discussed.

Is it?

I believe we're talking relationships.   But I guess if you correlate rape and relationships... then i'm sorry if I offended ya.

[Masterbainter]

Touche.

[pwhodges]

Not really a joke; it was easy to read: "There is no victims, only volunteers" as being more widely applicable, in particular as rapists still often say: "she was asking for it".  If you don't believe that in general, then I am pleased.

[0bsessions]

Obviously it wasn'[t a joke, because

[Alex C]

Warning, tangent incoming.

One thing I dislike about playing WoW and other online games again is how often rape is casually used as a synonym for something that kicks ass or does a lot of damage/dominates. I swear to god I'm not making this up, but a few weeks back I saw a guy on trade channel named "Ohiostate" who cheerfully recommended a particular talent spec because it "totally rapes." I responded with "WTS: Self-Awareness & Perspective." Never got sent back so many "lol, no shit" and "Yeah, that was pretty sad," tells in my life. Talk about playing up to a stereotype.

[nobo]

yeah, Ohio State is a terrible place.

[MrBlu]

I caught my ex-girlfriend cheating on me with her ex.  I knocked on the door of her house after seeing his truck in her driveway and she answered the door in his t-shirt and nothing else.

Ever notice it's always a guy with a truck?

And it's true; Girls hate being caught. As if they have some divine right to do whatever the @#$% they want.

And they say that men are dogs.


Oh, hey, I've got another one.

So a friend of mine, who migrated to Canada a couple years back, right? We were talking, and she was trying to fool her friends into thinking she had a significant other (I don't get it either), and somehow, I got hit with that stick (bad timing?).

So, after a couple exchanged photos, hearts in WLM screen-names, etc. people believe it. We were pretty close, so hey, we left each other's names in our Screen-names. Everything's peachy, her friends are aptly fooled (Canucks are kinda simple though)... Then one day, I'm out of her SN, and she switches email addresses, and cancels her FB account. And that was that.

I was kinda just going through the motions, so I wasn't really concerned, but it hit me as strange. That was about 2 months ago.

Today, while I was having dinner...

Girl: So, David, you're officially my boyfriend at school. According to my friends.

I got to about "you're officially my boyfriend-" before I nearly choked on my food.

I don't get it, am I single or what?

[Ballard]

My friend, you are being whipped. Abort ASAP.

On a serious note, talk to the girl and demand a serious explanation 'cause this is pretty flaky on her part.

[jmrz]

Okay, those of you who have said in the last page or so of this thread anything relating to woman hating being caught and how we are horrible people and lie and cheat on everyone, or something along those lines - please, think about what you have just said. Have you spoken to every single woman on the planet in regards to their relationships and whether or not they behave this way? I'd suggest not.

Not all woman are like that. Neither are all men. People are people and yes people do stupid things sometimes but that is NO excuse for anyone to take one persons actions and reflect them on to an entire gender.

Think about what you are actually saying before you type it out because numerous people may take offense to such massive generalisations.

Also:

Eh, I've had a few.   One bad blow job ruined about a year relationship of mine.   I ended it there when she couldn't keep up with the good chewin'.

My god I hope you are joking. Because if you aren't there are damn better ways to deal with what you see as inadequacies in your sex life. Try communication for a start.

[Ballard]

Ever notice it's always a guy with a truck?

And it's true; Girls hate being caught. As if they have some divine right to do whatever the @#$% they want.

And they say that men are dogs.

Dude see we are the same age so I normally wouldn't judge your posts based on that but honestly, you are 16 years old. How many girls have cheated on you ever and how many of the guys they've cheated with have even had drivers' licenses, let alone trucks?

It looks a little ridiculous when someone tries to act older than they are. Don't be that person.

[Spluff]

I agree on the truck thing, but your average sixteen year old would have had ten or so relationships, it's not unfeasible that a few of them have cheated.

But to say girls hate being caught is silly. Everybody hates being caught.

[Allybee]

ten? average? fuck.

[Liz]

Ally that is what I was thinking. I have not been in anywhere near ten relationships and I'm 20.

21 tomorrow. Dear god. I am lame.