Fun Stuff > CHATTER
Please, Just Let Me Die Already
LeeC:
good job aimless!
i am wondering where I am at with this one girl. When I got back from the San Diego trip (FUCKING AWESOME by the way) I had to teach new hire training at work. I had cracked a joke that I was jet lagged after my trip to san diego. This girl stayed after class to talk with me about it. She said she never been to DC before and didnt know what to do. So I gave her my number and told her to call me if she wanted to go out and have fun. She found out I was leaving GAO soon and wanted to have lunch with me. So I took her to a nice place and we had a great time and she said she would really like to do this again with me. We are suppose to go again this thursday. Again I dont know where I am at with her. Just a friend, a potential relationship, or what.
calenlass:
How about just wait and see where it goes?
onewheelwizzard:
Yeah, seems like the kind of thing that could turn into just about anything but is likely to be fun regardless. Hang out!
Hey shippythread, my life is AWESOME right now, because I have a new girl in my life and she is a real girlfriend and not just someone I sleep with sometimes! Usually I am perfectly OK with having people in my life who are friends I sleep with sometimes. That is something I have tended to enjoy, and I have developed myself into someone who is quite good at maintaining that dynamic successfully. However, it has gotten pretty stale. There's no risk involved anymore, it's not really interesting. Just sleeping with someone every now and then, without committing to a certain degree of mutual emotional support and time devotion, has gotten boring.
Fortunately, about 2 1/2 weeks ago, I walked into the apartment of a friend of a friend, and said second-degree friend's roommate turned out to be an absolutely wonderful girl with whom I shared a great many interests. Mutual interest got to be quite strong quite quick, and we started seeing each other for real for real (read: fucking) a little more than a week ago. Since then we have spent a LOT of time together (including a bar quizzo with her friends, a Burner rave with my friends, and dinner at my parents' house), developed our understanding of each others' lives quite a bit, and become extremely close. We have already traded statements that we are both totally sold on this relationship and really really excited for where it is going and what it's going to do for us. I've been floating around on a cloud for the past week and a half.
Whee!
NeverQuiteGoth:
--- Quote from: 20 jazz funk greats on 18 Aug 2009, 09:10 ---oh come on now. we talked for 15 minutes at most before exchanging phone numbers and have only texted briefly since (but haven't had actual phone conversations). i don't think that is enough time to establish a real connection with someone unless you believe in love at first sight. i may have exaggerated how interested he seems in me a tiny bit. maybe it's me, maybe he's just desperate for a gf in general.
--- End quote ---
He will be crushed. If he is the kind of guy he sounds like, in other words, conforming to the "socially awkward virgin" archetype, then he will be utterly destroyed if you lead him on and then cast him off. He doesn't think he loves you, he thinks that because you're interested in him, he should devote all of his willpower towards making himself love you. It is a very fragile state, but its not you specifically so much as the validation he's finally getting as a sexually viable male. The fact that someone is finally seeing him that way. To a guy like that, its a very, very powerful thing, and by leading him on and then dropping him, you'll shatter that validation, no matter how kindly you explain it. And if you wait until he succeeds in making himself love you, he'll probably suffer permanent mental and emotional damage.
In short, girls who don't understand this(like you, apparently) are the reason so many guys end up becoming heartless bastards. Its the only way they can survive.
onewheelwizzard:
OK dude this is what you have to go on so far:
--- Quote --- i am trying to be open-minded and give new boys a chance. actually agreed to go on a date with one tomorrow. but i feel so indifferent about him that i wouldn't even care if he never showed up. except THIS one would probably show up like an hour early cause he is soooooo into me and would cook me dinner and watch chick flicks with me and send me cheesy text message poetry. but i really don't want any of those things. at least not from him. fuuuuuuuck. i am kind of tempted to cancel this date. should i? or am i just being unfair to this new guy just cause he's not as deep as the other one and overly eager and uses horrible shorthand in his texts?
--- End quote ---
The fact that you are so totally convinced that he is such a fragile person, such a "socially awkward virgin," based on nothing but this, even though you know that even THIS is based on only 15 minutes of conversation and a few text messages, is ... well, it indicates to me that you have no fucking clue what you're talking about. I mean, I don't either. You might be right. He might be really REALLY emotionally unstable and fragile and he might end up being totally crushed by a rejection from someone he barely knows and who barely knows him. But you don't KNOW that, and to assume it is honestly kind of offensive (or at least, if I were this guy, and I read what you've said and it wasn't actually true, I'd be pretty offended at the kind of assumptions you've made).
Bottom line is, there has not been enough communication for anyone to know what you claim to know. Stop guilt-tripping 20JFG, you're totally jumping the gun and you're doing no help for anyone.
Navigation
[0] Message Index
[#] Next page
[*] Previous page
Go to full version