Okay, so Tommy gives pretty great advice. Telling someone you aren't interested in them is really really hard for a lot of people. I've been in that situation three times since I broke up with my ex and for each one of those I was able to say that I was kind of seeing someone. One of those I bought up casually in conversation (to get rid of a friend I made the mistake of having a one night stand with), another one blatantly told me that he was "pretty interested" in me and that I seemed fairly not interested in him. The third actually asked me straight out how my current love life was and I mentioned I was seeing someone. I just couldn't bring myself to tell any of them that I wasn't actually interested a whole deal because each of them are all decent guys and are quite lovely, yet I didn't want to upset them or seem like a horrible person and just took the easy way out kind of?
Anyway, relationship advice is something I need.
So, I'm kind of sort of seeing someone. We used to work together, got chatting again after I broke up with my ex, chatting turned into flirting and flirting turned into us making out. We talked about it all before we got too into it and basically agreed that it was entirely no-strings-attached as I'd just broken up with my ex and didn't particularly want to jump straight into another relationship after a few long term ones over the past few years.
After a few weeks I pretty much told him that I did like him and didn't want to make things weird. We talked about actually dating and seeing how things went and whatever, but not particularly telling everyone we knew that we were A Couple. This was great! We both seemed to be happy with this option. The next time I see him (later on that week I think), he tells me that he doesn't want to do the Serious Relationship thing, doesn't want to make things weird and can we keep things as they are? I am a touch disappointed but was all "this is okay, I mean, I'm coming from long term relationship after long term relationship, keeping things as they are is good with me, and besides, it's not like either of us are out looking for anyone else right now" he agreed and we just left it at that.
So, fast forward to now, which is about three months since this started. We talk pretty much every day, he'll send me random texts if we haven't talked in a while to tell me about his day, see how my day was. He's constantly seeing what I'm up to that night and wanting me to come over etc. We hang out every Friday which basically involves watching him play indoor soccer (he plays with his brother and friends, so I sit with their gf's and chat), then we all grab dinner, then we watch a movie and sexytimes ensue). He never wants me to go home and I basically end up getting home at ridiculous hours.
I've had dinner with his Mum and family a couple of times and we get along well. He's cuddly and affectionate with me in front of family and his mum has referred to me, to him, as "your girl".
Basically, the way I see the whole thing is as a 'pseudo-relationship' I guess. I mean, we talk pretty much every day, we get along really well (more so lately, things are starting to feel more relaxed/different/better) and neither of us are with anyone else (that I know of).
It all sounds kind of wonderful and fantastic, because it's the relationship you're having when you aren't having one - all the great bits without the drama almost. Except, I kind of think I might kind of maybe love him? And I can't really tell him that because he didn't want to do the Serious Relationship, but it feels like that's what it is anyway, but I don't want to Ruin Everything Forever.
I dunno, I guess I kind of just want to figure out whether or not he's actually in this for ME or whether he's in it until something else comes along. I don't think it's the second option, he really really doesn't seem like that kind of guy, but things people have mentioned in regards to this kind of situation make me doubt things and all.