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Bedazzled thread

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JD:
A hobo gives you a roadkill sandwich.

I wish for a kitten.

Christophe:
Everyone in your friends and family loves your kitten more than you.

I wish I had a solid-gold toilet and a unicorn.

Cernunnos:
the unicorn is stuck in the toilet

EDIT:  I wish for the ability to teleport.

Dazed:
You cannot control where you end up, and are now engulfed in magma.

I wish the Sox were playing tonight, I am bored.

Lines:
The Sox are playing hopscotch and you are more bored than ever.

I wish I had better skin.

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