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[Masterbainter]

I'm not sure if there has been an alcohol thread yet or not.  I have a friend who's 21st birthday is next week and trying to get some girly drink ideas lined up.  I usually just do morgan coke, but want to be put together a list of good shot(yummy) or good drinks (yummy).  Name and how to make would be superb, most bars here know how to make though.

[Hat]

man this is my thread THIS IS MY THREAD GUYS

general tip:  
- don't order a Martini, Manhattan, cosmopolitan, or any other cocktail you know classy people drink cause you probably won't like it, these are hard terrifying drinks for people who actually enjoy the tastes of the liquors in them.

Here are some good shots!:

BOOZE BULLETS (shots)

sweet shit

sicilian kiss: for each shot muddle 2-3 lime wedges, half an ounce of southern comfort, half an ounce of amaretto, shake and strain into a champagne flute/shotglass

Jam Doughnut: chambord with baileys layered on top, in a sugar rimmed shot glass

schlime: muddle 2-3 lime wedges, half an ounce of parasio (lychee liquer), and half an ounce of green chartreuse. Shake and strain into a champagne flute/shotglass

I gave the recipes because I know 2 of these shots are well known here, but generally shooter/cocktail ingredients have a lot of regional variation when you're talking about sweet or fruity drinks. Most other shooters I've had are pretty awful to be honest, I generally prefer shots with a lot of hard liquor in them, like the three wise men on acid (10ml Jim Beam, 10 Johnny Walker, and 10 Jack Daniels, with chartreuse layered on top)

if you live in an area that allows flaming shots in bars, get an absinthe/bacardi 151/chambord flaming shot because you will be amazed at how smooth it is considering the ingredients. By flaming shots I mean prepared by a dude who knows what they are doing though, (not just getting your shot and lighting it on fire and then putting it out you idiot), if anyone wants me to make a youtube video of how to properly prepare flaming shots, I'd be happy to (though I don't actually have any flammable alcohol at home atm but I can demonstrate the principle)

Gonna write up a huge list of the cocktails, probably ranked by how pretty they look because to be honest, when you make sweet drinks for pretty women, its a sad fact they're more likely to notice that than the taste.

[Masterbainter]

then please share.  I'm such a boring one drink guy.  I need some info on what the ladies will like or want.  I'm put in charge of getting their night set up and taken care of.


edit: thanks!

[Hat]

dude there is a much bigger post coming so stick around if you dig on dark rums I have some IDEAS for you that you might like, as well as a whole truck load of girlier sweeter shit which I am assuming is what you mean by "yummy" although there will be some other shit that is delicious and not full of sugar as well just in case that tickles your fancy as well.

I actually kind of planned to make a thread along these lines a little while ago, and can't remember if I ever did. If I find it, I'll link it for you as well but it is probably just me swearing about gin.

Actually I found this incredibly old thread where Harry claims that a G&T should never be made with lemon, Harry if you are reading this, something you said four years ago made me absolutely livid you should feel proud, it is hard to bring a man to a seething rage with that kind of delay.

[Dazed]

Irish Car Bombs lead to bad decisions.

Get some of those.

[scarred]

^^^ At least 4.

[MrBlu]

1 part pitcher/jug
1 part 151 Rum
1 part Malibu Rum
Lots of PJ (Pineapple Juice)

Pour quarter pitcher of 151, another quarter of Malibu, and fill the rest with PJ.

You've got a Caribou Lou. You may add your cola of choice.

[Hat]

COCKTAILS:

not going to bother listing proportions for these but I'll list the ingredients for a general idea of the taste, but there's still a lot of room for variation depending on what kind of bar you go to and what drink it is

French Martini: vodka (maybe vanilla infused), chambord, pineapple juice, and it is SO PINK buy this drink for your girliest friend.

Fruit Tingle: basically vodka, blue curacao, lemonade and a bit of red cordial/grenadine, although if your bartender puts parfait amour in it as well do not complain because your drink will look gorgeous and taste like satin rainbows, instead of like looking like an electric neon nightmare and tasting like a new slurpee flavour you dumped some vodka in. Still, an easy cocktail to drink that looks kind of cool either way.

Sex on the Beach: this is probably the drink with the widest range of variations, but just order one anyway, its got a funny name! If your bartender uses Peach Schnapps you are probably in for a treat, if they use some kind of brown liquor maybe just run and find another bar.

Sours: Amaretto and Midori work pretty well with this, but really any liquer with a high enough alcohol content worth a damn is good for this, and if you are a real badass, you should just order a whiskey sour.  Basically a sour is the base ingredient, some citrus (usually lemon), some sugar, and an egg white, shaken to hell. If the idea of a raw egg white creeps you out, or the bar is dodgy, just stipulate that you want a sour without the eggwhite, its for texture rather than taste.

Chocolate Martini: Basically vodka and white creme de cacao. Pro tip if you make these at home, squirt some of that icecream topping that hardens on top of the icecream into a chilled cocktail (martini) glass in a spiral and it will freeze hard like that holy shit you have a pretty garnish ready for you to strain the drink from the shaker into the glass,

White Russian: Vodka, Kalua and Milk/cream. If you replace the cream with Baileys, you have a mudslide! Do not drink a lot of these because your stomach will be full of milk and alcohol and this is a bad idea

Margarita: Only order this if you are in a fairly nice bar and your bartender seems to know what he is doing (and most importantly) if you cannot see a blender anwhere if you get a blended margarita I will find where you live and punch you. A good margarita (preferably on the rocks) is amazing, highly potent, and quite easy to drink. If it is a shitty bar or bartender, you are probably going to get a turd in a glass.

Old San Juan Sour: kind of like a sweeter cube libre, uses cranberry juice and sugar syrup instead of coke

Ok my housemate has just asked me to make him a bloody mary cause we've been talking about this shit while I write this post, so I am going to leave you with this drink my friend made for me once.

muddle a  fewwedges of orange, 1 shot of dark rum (pref coruba), half a shot of vanilla galliano, top with soda water

doesn't have a name and you'll need a bored bartender to just figure out some drink some dude on the internet told you his friend made him once (I've guesstimated the proportions cause I was drunk when he made it and can't remember the specifics) but it is amazing as well

I will post some more shit later

[Zingoleb]

Margarita: Only order this if you are in a fairly nice bar and your bartender seems to know what he is doing (and most importantly) if you cannot see a blender anwhere if you get a blended margarita I will find where you live and punch you.

I am sorry but I am on like my tenth re-reading of this sentence and I still cannot understand what you are getting at.

[Hat]

Also Mr Blu that drink is so trashy but I want it real bad.

[kemon]

Margarita: Only order this if you are in a fairly nice bar, and your bartender seems to know what he is doing, and (most importantly) if you cannot see a blender anwhere.  If you get a blended margarita I will find where you live and punch you.

I am sorry but I am on like my tenth re-reading of this sentence and I still cannot understand what you are getting at.

that help?

[Zingoleb]

Yes, very much so.

[Hat]

Margarita: Only order this if you are in a fairly nice bar and your bartender seems to know what he is doing (and most importantly) if you cannot see a blender anwhere if you get a blended margarita I will find where you live and punch you.

I am sorry but I am on like my tenth re-reading of this sentence and I still cannot understand what you are getting at.

basically it is a list of things that you need to be sure you will get a good margarita. A nice bar will have nice tequila and will probably use cointreau (or grand marnier?!?) instead of generic triple sec, and use fresh lime juice. Using cheap tequila, crappy triple sec, or bottled lime juice are all great ways to fuck up a Margarita. If your bartender doesn't know what he is doing, he is probably less likely to rim the glass well, make sure the proportions are right, etc, and if they have a blender (a bar can have a blender and not blend margaritas, but be on the safe side here) well, people have been executed in 3rd world countries for crimes that are more petty than making frozen margaritas.

I am passionate about margaritas to the point of not caring if I am being coherent or not is what I am saying here.

[Zingoleb]

No, it was just the sentence structure that confused me. One missing period.

I feel like a cunt now. I don't like feeling like a cunt.

[Hat]

to be fair I have made myself a very strong, complicated drink in preparation for every post I have made in this thread so I could be lapsing more and more into incoherence as I go along

[BeoPuppy]

[...] I am passionate about margaritas to the point of not caring if I am being coherent or not is what I am saying here.

Ever considered that your passion for margaritas ensures your lack of cohesion in this matter?

Edit: Damn.

[MrBlu]

Also Mr Blu that drink is so trashy but I want it real bad.

It is. It will ensure your getting "crunk", "tipsy" and will make "baby girl come... out of her shell and raise hell, don't stop till the cops come".

20 points if anyone gets the movie/song reference.

[Hat]

Ok I need the internet's opinion on something and this is probably the best place to ask

so I just made my housemate a bloody mary but we are pretty stoned and pretty drunk so I wound up putting a hot beef sausage in it as a garnish instead of celery.

Basically it is pretty awesome and we cannot decide whether the better name for it is the "Beefy Mary" or the "Slutty Mary"

[Zingoleb]

Slutty Mary hands down I mean come on

[Aimless]

Slippery Nipple (shooter)

1 part sambuca

1 part Bailey's

Float the Bailey's on the sambuca. Easy as it gets, and probably my favourite shooter

[Hat]

While we are talking about sambuca and floating, make a vodka and orange, float sambuca on top and you have made a fucking Harvey Wallbanger right there hell yeah. (it is a bit tricky to float sambuca you might need to use a spoon)

Also I have a lot of white chocolate and a lot of ginger and I am just drunk enough to try to do something with both of these in the same drink. CAN I PULL IT OFF? Stay tuned! (probably not)

[MrBlu]

Ok I need the internet's opinion on something and this is probably the best place to ask

so I just made my housemate a bloody mary but we are pretty stoned and pretty drunk so I wound up putting a hot beef sausage in it as a garnish instead of celery.

Basically it is pretty awesome and we cannot decide whether the better name for it is the "Beefy Mary" or the "Slutty Mary"

Yeah, Slutty Mary, just 'cuz.

[Hat]

I feel I may have biased the sample audience in favour of "Slutty Mary" by describing the sausage as 'a hot beef sausage"

[Zingoleb]

Slutty Mary sounds closer to the original so it is not too different and being different is what scares people so I that's why I stick with it.

It also rolls off the tongue easier. Slutty Mary. Beefy Mary. Slutty Mary. Beefy Mary.

Beefy Mary sounds like the nickname of that butch chick down at the gym that you don't want to accidentally say to her face

[ViolentDove]

Ok I need the internet's opinion on something and this is probably the best place to ask

so I just made my housemate a bloody mary but we are pretty stoned and pretty drunk so I wound up putting a hot beef sausage in it as a garnish instead of celery.

I laughed so hard when I read this I had one of those laughter segueing into coughing fit things.

[Inlander]

Actually I found this incredibly old thread where Harry claims that a G&T should never be made with lemon, Harry if you are reading this, something you said four years ago made me absolutely livid you should feel proud, it is hard to bring a man to a seething rage with that kind of delay.

The truth hurts like a flaming sword of justice.

Incidentally someone should invent a cocktail called "The Flaming Sword of Justice".

Actually fuck it, let's just rename all our existing cocktails with names reminiscent of bad sword & sorcery films from the 80s.

[BeoPuppy]

Or, better yet, forget about cocktails, as the name is just gay, and learn to drink scotch.

[Eris]

I have been told of a drink called the Purple People Eater. it is, uh, Gin and parfait amour. My brother likes it, and he doesn't drink, so it might be good for people who don't like alcohol much?

The Oxford Art Factory makes nice jugs of cocktails, my favourite being the Bob Dylan. Half fill a jug with ice, add 2 shots of vanilla vodka, a shot of white creme de cacao, top with lemonade and a few wedges of lime/lemon squeezed on top.

Another one is the Andy Warhol. Jug of ice as before, 2 shots of vodka, a shot of peach schnapps, some cranberry juice and top up with orange juice. That one is kinda girlier, though. Both of them are very easy to drink a lot of, though.

[ViolentDove]

Oh man that apple one at OAF is pretty awesome too. Can't remember what's in it, though.

[Eris]

There was one that wasn't on the list last time we were there that has absinthe and apple juice and mint, the Van Gogh, but I can't remember whether there was anything else.

[McTaggart]

What I drink depends heavily on where I am and who I'm out with. If I'm drinking for pleasure on a quiet night it's usually a gin like tanqueray and tonic. If I am drinking at a trashy house party it is usually a gin like gordons and lemonade and whatever stupid shots people are trying to do. If I'm at a place that does cocktails then I will go through their menu try things that are new.

Other neat thing: Get a rocks glass and add one part Southern Comfort, one part cranberry juice and half a part lime juice. It's fantastically sharp.
Other trashy thing: Get half a lime, squeeze out a fair portion of the juice, fill it with tequila.

[elizaknowswhatshesfor]

While we are talking about sambuca and floating, make a vodka and orange, float sambuca on top and you have made a fucking Harvey Wallbanger right there hell yeah. (it is a bit tricky to float sambuca you might need to use a spoon)

REALLY?!? I thought it was Grand Marnier on the top of a Harvey Wallbanger?

http://www.channel4.com/food/recipes/drinks/cocktails/harvey-wallbanger-recipe_p_1.html

I like your style Hat. There are some shooters there I hadn't ever made/heard of! (this is a rare thing!) I have changed a lot of peoples minds about tequila, simply by making them decent balanced drinks & using a good brand!

Parfait Amour (1 part) & vanilla vodka (2 parts) shaken over ice, strained into a martini glass & topped up with a wee splash of cranberry juice is a beautiful colour, looks fancy (Esp. if you garnish it with an edible flower of some kind.) tasty & a nice variation on a cosmo. But probably dangerous as depending on how you make it, it's strong!

Also this is a good mixed drink & can be made in a big jug as it is a mixed drink, not strictly a cocktail:

25ml vanilla vodka

25ml raspberry vodka

100ml lemonade

Add the vanilla vodka to the raspberry vodka over ice, then top up with lemonade to your required taste

Taste like the kids lollipop called Drumstick. Not for those who dont have a sweet tooth

[allison]

My favourite girly drinks!
Caramel apple martini - 2 parts butterscotch schapps, 2 parts apple liquer (some like to use sour apple) and 1 part vodka, splash of cranberry
Porn Star (one variation) - 1/4 oz Chambord, 1/2 oz blue curacao, 1.5 oz raspberry vodka, 3 oz lemonade or Sprite. This is sometimes done as a bomb - liquor in a shot glass then drop it into the lemonade/sprite and CHUG!
Sex on the Beach - 1/4 oz Chambord, 1.5 oz peach schapps, 1.5 oz vodka (sometimes lemon or raspberry), 2 oz each of cranberry, orange and pineapple juice

Shooters:
Kamikaze - 1 oz Triple Sec, 1 oz citrus vodka, 1 oz lime juice
Southern Kiss - 1 oz amaretto, 1 oz Southern Comfort
Emerald Isle - 1 oz blue curacao, 1 oz melon liquer, 1 oz vodka

And because it's her birthday, the ever popular Blow Job! 1/2 oz each of Kahlua and Bailey's in a shot glass, then top it up with as much whipped cream as you can put on it. This shot has to be taken without using hands. It's a fun thing to make the birthday girl do.

[a pack of wolves]

Taste like the kids lollipop called Drumstick. Not for those who dont have a sweet tooth.

I might have to try this, sweet drinks and flavoured vodka is not massively my thing but I really miss Drumsticks since I'm sure they're packed with hooves and other such disturbing matter, so have been off the menu for years. I also need to stop being so boring with cocktails and always drinking daiquiris, mint julips, mojitos and vegan white russians all the time.

[elizaknowswhatshesfor]

You know full well they are not mine either, but this one I do like! There's a pub in Nottingham that does a different cocktail of the week, we go there for cocktail mondays. As they have been doing it for a couple of years the cocktails are usually quite interesting (If not all that well made)

Are refreshers vegan? If they are, put some in a cheapish bottle of vodka, leave for a week & drink with cranberry juice. Tastes awesome!

My fella isn't all that au fait with nice drinks so I've been doing some introducing & experimenting...Mostly with rum & gin (Not together)

I should also add Pimms cup. This is my recipe and I think it's awesome. Again, good for birthday's as it looks pretty (When done right!) & can be served in a jug!

2 Parts Pimms
1/2  Part gin

Strawberries thinly sliced long ways.
Finely chopped cucumber
Fresh Mint
Ice

Ginger beer (pref. Old Jamaca)

Little muddle the cucmber & mint in the bottom of the jug then add strawbs & ice & stir up well. Add Gin & Pimms. Stirr again (This is to make sure the fruit is well mixed, also to release the flavours) then top up with the ginger beer.

Also swap the gin for a good light rum (Sailor Jerry's) The cucumber for green apple & either serve with Ginger beer or Cream Soda.

I also make it with raseberry vodka & raseberries instead of strawberries. I also quite like apple juice instead of a soda.

If there are so many things you can do with variations of the spirit, fruit & mixer. It can be quite fun! Take out the cucmber & try these two as well! (You can, if you like drinks a little sharper try chopping a lime into 8ths & muddling)

Blueberries/rum & cream soda.
Blackberries/gin & lemonade (Try to get good old fashioned cloudy)

As much as I am a drinks purist I love messing around with flavours, as mentioned above I have a good guine pig to test things out on!

I also think when you are in a bar & the bartender seems to know what they are doing ask them to make you something off menu, if they are any good they will ask you what base spirit you like & whether you prefer sweet/sour/creamy etc. & hopefully make you something interesting. I have a shot named after me because of this!

 Argh! I'm so excited by this thread, I will have to try hard not to break any newbie rules....

[SilentJ]

@OP 100 bonus points if you can get somebody to drink a Cement Mixer.

Using cheap tequila, crappy triple sec, or bottled lime juice are all great ways to fuck up a Margarita.

On this point, make sure to actually go to a bar, as opposed to just the bar side of a restaurant (as you would find in a TGI Friday's or Ruby Tuesday's or something).  The Friday's I work in is certainly like the worst offender, but bars are dedicated solely to alcohol, whereas restaurants have to balance booze and food costs.  As such, they're notorious for having their bartenders watch their customers and after they've had a few they'll start making their drinks with rail liquors, because most of the people that drink in such places can't tell the difference once they've got a buzz.  Plus most cocktails/mixed drinks and the like are usually made with rails, unless they're asked otherwise.  Pretty much in a restaurant's bar the only time you're guaranteed a good liquor is if you order a shot of a specific brand.

For example, if you order a shot of Patron or Cuervo Especial, you will get it, but if you get a margarita it'll get made with like El Chico or Montezuma and that shit is just awful.

[onewheelwizzard]

I find that whiskey and green tea mix very well together.  I don't know if it has a name but when I was living at school and we had hotel parties (different drink in each room in the house), it was often my pick.

[allison]

a good light rum (Sailor Jerry's)

THIS

[McTaggart]

I find that whiskey and green tea mix very well together.  I don't know if it has a name but when I was living at school and we had hotel parties (different drink in each room in the house), it was often my pick.

Green tea is great for taking the edge off a crappy whiskey or tequila. Doesn't always taste real pleasant, but if you're drinking for the right reasons (by which I mean the wrong reasons) it gets you there.

[Reed]

I love cement mixers.

Not because they taste great or anything, but because the texture really doesn't bother me at all. It's so funny to see everyone cringe or make terrible faces as you take a cement mixer.

Also, for easy girly drinks you can always just make strawberry lemonade using a matching infused vodka.

[imapiratearg]

Also Mr Blu that drink is so trashy but I want it real bad.

It is. It will ensure your getting "crunk", "tipsy" and will make "baby girl come... out of her shell and raise hell, don't stop till the cops come".

20 points if anyone gets the movie/song reference.

It's "Caribou Lou" by Tech Nyne or however you spell it.  Don't know the movie reference.

[MrBlu]

Rum Cream and lime juice? Why not just take a Mojito and poop in it?

EDIT::
Tech N9ne. And the song was in the movie "Alpha Dog".

[Hat]

Actually I found this incredibly old thread where Harry claims that a G&T should never be made with lemon, Harry if you are reading this, something you said four years ago made me absolutely livid you should feel proud, it is hard to bring a man to a seething rage with that kind of delay.

The truth hurts like a flaming sword of justice

Harry it is not very befitting of a mod to engage in deliberate falsehoods in for the sole reason of enraging me cut that shit out now

I mean yes if you are making your G&T with Beefeater or Tanqueray, yes you are absolutely right, but plenty of Gins (Hendricks being the best example I can think of) are far superior with just a hint of lemon. There is a reason some martinis are actually better with a lemon twist for garnish!.

At least you are not one of those bizarre cucumber garnishing savages though.

Or, better yet, forget about cocktails, as the name is just gay, and learn to drink scotch.

It's good to know how to drink Scotch, because as John Birmingham said (paraphrased) "If you drink Scotch, you will be able to drink in the company of the filthiest scumbags and in the House of Lords", but a man relegated to nothing but brown liquors, and the tiniest splashes of soda water, will eventually brought low by being constantly confronted by the reckless contemplation his drink inspires

[De_El]

Bret if I had an absurd amount of money I would be your patron and finance your practice of this art.

[bainidhe_dub]

a good light rum (Sailor Jerry's)

THIS

Heck yes.

[Inlander]

plenty of Gins (Hendricks being the best example I can think of) are far superior with just a hint of lemon.

Actually when using Hendricks I garnish my G&T with a few crushed up sage leaves.

Try that shit, it works like magic.

[Yayniall]

Manhattans are the bomb.
Also Southern Comfort + Lemonade + Lime.
My hat for Sailor Jerry too (Captain Morgan for something darker)
I don't get what the big deal is about Scotch, I much prefer Irish whiskey.

edit:
Also Long Island Iced Tea and Tokyo Iced Tea (minus the tequili, plus midori, switch coke for lemonade)

[öde]

I wish we could make nice cocktails at my bar.

[Masterbainter]

Lots of info... I'm taking notes... Gonna go to bars this weekend and ask them if they can or can not make certain drinks.   Gonna have this girl and her friends blasted.  Probably gonna be puke all over the party bus, haha.

[BeoPuppy]

[...]
I don't get what the big deal is about Scotch, I much prefer Irish whiskey.
[...]

Get a Bowmore or an Ardbeg or a Lagavulin ... or basically anything from Islay.

Current favourite: a Bowmore from 2000, cask strength.