Back when I worked at Michael's, I had a coworker who would always return from lunch and say, "Fear me, I have returned!" One day, she was working the customer service desk (note: she was helping someone) when I came back from lunch, so I said it to her. She asked why, to which I replied, "Supposedly I eat babies." (No response from the customer.) My coworker giggled and asked how I ate them. "Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew." My coworker laughed really hard, but I got the most disturbed look from the customer she was helping which made me laugh my butt off.