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Author Topic: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)  (Read 13132 times)

Is it cold in here?

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This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« on: 14 Nov 2009, 02:04 »
In number 37, Marten complains to Jimbo that he has thousands in student loans to pay off.

In #435, Marten's mom says her work paid for Marten's tuition.

It would violate the no-nitpicking rule to complain about this apparent inconsistency, but there's no rule against making up elaborate silly stories to "explain" it. Surely we can come up with something more interesting than the real explanation.

How about this: Marten's mom tried to game the system by having him take out student loans even though he didn't need them and then invest the proceeds. Unfortunately, the investment in Hillary Clinton porn flopped, leaving Marten on the hook to pay back the loans out of his meager income.

Or, Marten had his tuition covered, but even his mother's income couldn't cover the cost of textbooks, so he had to take out multi-kilobuck loans to finance them.

Or maybe it was peer pressure -- his fellow students surrounded him in a circle and said "All the COOL kids are taking out student loans".

Or Marten lied to his mother about the tuition to spare her feelings and allow her to believe she was covering his education while he sank into debt.

None of these are quite wacky enough. We need to get Pintsize into the story somehow.
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scarred

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #1 on: 14 Nov 2009, 02:15 »
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Carl-E

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #2 on: 14 Nov 2009, 05:51 »
Please remember that tuition is only one part of the cost of going to college.  There's housing, fees, textbooks, and they all often add up to more than tuition! 

My graduate assistantship paid my tuition in grad school.  Didn't pay for housing or food, though... still have loans out the ass, even after refinancing I'll be paying them off well into retirement! 
« Last Edit: 15 Nov 2009, 09:59 by Carl-E »
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Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 08 May 2013, 11:10
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bicostp

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #3 on: 15 Nov 2009, 08:27 »
Well, at least you can write off all the student loan interest on your tax return! (At least, I know you can if you got a government student loan package...)
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Carl-E

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #4 on: 15 Nov 2009, 10:01 »
Small, relatively cold comfort, believe me! 
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Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 08 May 2013, 11:10
When people try to speak a gut reaction, they end up talking out their ass.

Is it cold in here?

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #5 on: 15 Nov 2009, 10:49 »
That must be how Marten was able to get an eleven hundred dollar tax refund.
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Sorflakne

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #6 on: 16 Nov 2009, 21:26 »
I've only been out of college for ~17 months, but if I wanted to bankrupt myself for a couple months, I could pay off all my student loans in full right now.

A government salary may suck, but it's guaranteed, comes more or less on time, and I even get a housing and subsistence allowance.  And a massive tax return; bought an Asus laptop with this year's return and still had several hundred left over for a new couch :D
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scrubadub

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #7 on: 17 Nov 2009, 05:33 »
I bet he was just tempted by an interest free loan even though his tuition was covered. He probably bought guitars and albums with it.
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Binary

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #8 on: 17 Nov 2009, 12:20 »
Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 14 Nov 2009, 02:04
Unfortunately, the investment in Hillary Clinton porn flopped

Can't imagine why...
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Is it cold in here?

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #9 on: 17 Nov 2009, 12:27 »
Good point: today he buys guitars every chance he gets. Maybe he didn't invest the money after all.
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Thorbard

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #10 on: 18 Nov 2009, 14:27 »
Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 17 Nov 2009, 12:27
Good point: today he buys guitars every chance he gets. Maybe he didn't invest the money after all.

On the other hand, those guitars aren't exactly loosing value every day. Neat little retirement fund?
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Carl-E

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #11 on: 18 Nov 2009, 18:15 »
Depends on the guitar.  You can't count on the value of things like that going up forever, it's market-driven. 
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Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 08 May 2013, 11:10
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Mr_Rose

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #12 on: 19 Nov 2009, 05:24 »
Out of production "legendary" guitars have a fixed or shrinking supply so demand can only really increase unless their reputation gets ruined somehow, so it's therefore a fairly safe investment. I mean, the odds of someone finding a rich new vein of shit-brown Gibsons in an abandoned guitar-mine somewhere in IL are quite low.
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raoullefere

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #13 on: 21 Nov 2009, 07:47 »
Well, yeah, if you're just going to look in Illinois. I've often said shafts should be sunk in Iowa, Nebraska, and, of course, Manitoba, but nobody listens.
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Akima

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #14 on: 22 Nov 2009, 05:03 »
Quote from: raoullefere on 21 Nov 2009, 07:47
Well, yeah, if you're just going to look in Illinois. I've often said shafts should be sunk in Iowa, Nebraska, and, of course, Manitoba, but nobody listens.
Actually we have the world's largest reserves of shit-brown Gibsons here in Australia. We dig 'em out in huge open-cast mines and ship them directly to China, where they're broken up to make Guitar Hero controllers:

« Last Edit: 22 Nov 2009, 05:06 by Akima »
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raoullefere

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #15 on: 22 Nov 2009, 07:20 »
After Mr. Young picks them over, I assume.
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dps

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Re: This needs to be explained away (Marten's student loans)
« Reply #16 on: 23 Nov 2009, 14:11 »
Quote from: Carl-E on 14 Nov 2009, 05:51
Please remember that tuition is only one part of the cost of going to college.  There's housing, fees, textbooks, and they all often add up to more than tuition! 

Yeah, when I was in college, turtion was only about 1/6 or less of the fees I had to pay each semester.  That includes room and board in the dorms, but not books and supplies.  In a typical semester, the required textbooks themselves were more than the tuition.
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