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He may be a perfect gentleman, causing them to worry what he's really up to

16 (27.1%)

He or Hanners may ask for a second date

21 (35.6%)

They're already worried, he doesn't have to do anything

22 (37.3%)

Total Members Voted: 52

[Moxie]

I don't think Dora is uncomfortable with the Sven/Hanners date because of her "issues" with him. I think it's because of his previous horrible treatment of Faye and the awkwardness that followed.

Sven has a long-running history of basically ruining the lives of the ladies he dates, to the extent where Dora has quite explicitly told him, "Do not date any of my friends!"  The one time she let him break that rule, well, we all know what happened with Faye.

Wait, what? Sven treated Faye horribly and ruined Faye's life? Really? From where I'm standing, it looks like Faye not only got over some of those roadblock issues she was having with intimacy, she also grew enough to be able to start to date Angus. Even Sven himself gives the appearance of trying to better himself. It was a really bad situation but so far we've seen positive growth from it.

Aw, c'mon.  The whole "One out-of-context quote from your entire post" thing?  Don't do that.  Don't be that guy.  Nobody wants you to be that guy.

Yeah, okay, "ruining the lives of the ladies he dates" might have been a bit overly dramatic, but I pretty obviously  did not mean that Sven literally ruined Faye's entire life the day he slept with Gina Riversmith.  That would be a whole new level of stupid.  I just meant that he obviously doesn't leave the ladies in good condition.  There was the chick he used Marten to try and dodge, the chick he used Faye to try and dodge, the chick who sent the Vespavenger after him, and then Faye...  yeah, okay, lives were not ruined, but it's not like these ladies are happy after the event.  Christ, Faye was so depressed months after she broke up with Sven that Dora actually called her on it when she commissioned the EspressoSaurus.

Now apparently nobody noticed, but from the start I've been in favour of this date, assuming Sven and Hanners don't get drunk and have the sex.  Because that would be a disaster.  No, I actually do like Sven and I hope his character arc ends up in a good place.  I want this to happen!  I'm just pointing out that, given Sven's history, it is perfectly reasonable for Dora to have questions about his intentions.  And to be protective of Hanners.

EDIT:
New comic!  I especially love the Plunger panel.  That is a face which is cute.

Fine, I will quote your entire quote, though I only want to say that the whole point of isolating that one part of your quote was to bring to light the extremeness of it. It's one thing to say the Hanners and Sven may leave Hanners very unhappy and distressed because Sven has that sort of history. It's entirely another to say that he ruins lives, and Dora tells him not to date her friends because he ruins lives, and by breaking that rule we all saw what happened to Faye....apparently a ruined life! In your entire original post I didn't read anything that implied you thought the statement was over-dramatic. I thought that the rest of your post was pretty cool and straightforward, which is why I didn't think I needed to quote the whole thing.
(Edit:In other words, it's a lot easier for me to comment one the one part of your post that I didn't agree with by only quoting it, rather than quoting the whole post and having to isolate that part out anyway. I'm not trying to be "that out-of-context-person".)





Meanwhile, I'm loving the faces in today's comic!

[Tergon]

Fine, I will quote your entire quote, though I only want to say that the whole point of isolating that one part of your quote was to bring to light the extremeness of it. It's one thing to say the Hanners and Sven may leave Hanners very unhappy and distressed because Sven has that sort of history. It's entirely another to say that he ruins lives, and Dora tells him not to date her friends because he ruins lives, and by breaking that rule we all saw what happened to Faye....apparently a ruined life! In your entire original post I didn't read anything that implied you thought the statement was over-dramatic. I thought that the rest of your post was pretty cool and straightforward, which is why I didn't think I needed to quote the whole thing.
(Edit:In other words, it's a lot easier for me to comment one the one part of your post that I didn't agree with by only quoting it, rather than quoting the whole post and having to isolate that part out anyway. I'm not trying to be "that out-of-context-person".)

  Don't worry.  If I was seriously annoyed I wouldn't have made a joke out of it.  No, you are right, like I said - that one phrase was a little overly dramatic.  I was just meaning that it wasn't meant to be taken literally.  He doesn't ruin entire lives, he just makes ladies feel like utter crap for long periods of time.  I was a little too caught up in my own hyperbole, I think.
Seems we agree on everything else, though, so that's fine with me.

*gives Moxie a replica Useless Broom Made Entirely Out Of Dicks as a reward*

[Moxie]

Hahaha, cool stuff   


And hey! My very own Useless Broom Made Entirely Out Of Dicks replica!  I'm honored! *stands ready to fight the good fight*

[Heliphyneau]

Hanners' expression in panel 6 is priceless (the Cave of 16 1/2 Asses has gained another ass?), but my favorite panel is #4 -- Cosette's inadvertant drive-by pastry-ing of Hanners.  ^_^  But would the slow motion action scene be more John Woo or Quentin Tarantino?

All this talk of Bloom County makes me want to see grown-up versions of Milo and Binkley walk in and order espressos.  >_>

And if Jet brandished a cash register (as opposed to a dangerous mango or banana) at Hanners, would she morph into Edward?

[foolsguinea]

OK, Jeph should market that "Staaaaaare" cat poster now!

[raoullefere]

Okay, I have to admit, that may have been even better than braining Hanners—especially when I consider the fact that it can all be repeated, over and over and over…

And, yes, panel six makes it all worthwhile.

Of course, the next panel would show me trying to brain Hannelore with the cash register, but that's just me.

See, what's hilarious about that is now I'm envisioning Jet braining Hanners with a cash register. 

I'm fairly sure Jet would brain Hanners. He's at least as much a GOM as I am.

[J]

sven is going to show up at 8 and find her od'd on her anxiety meds. huh, i wonder if she ever has anxiety about that

[Kugai]

Relax Hanners, it can only get better

Right

Right?   

[Sorflakne]

But, bathroom duty IS a part of the initiation...it was only subverted the one time because Dora was messing with Raven.

[snubnose]

Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooor Hanners !

[no one special]

I know it doesn't count for anything, but... I'm finding the new text rather distracting.   

Sorry Jeph!  Comic, of course, is fabulous as always 

[akronnick]

And hey! My very own Useless Broom Made Entirely Out Of Dicks replica!  I'm honored! *stands ready to fight the good fight*

[bullettoothtony]
That's funny, you've got "Replica" written down the side of your broom, while I've got "Desert Eagle, point-five-oh!" written down the side of mine...
[/bullettoothtony]

Just kidding, welcome to the Brigade!

[Border Reiver]

And as of 0650 Tuesday the 21st:

What will Hanners wear?

Pants are good start  8 (18.6%)
No, you fool, she could choose a skirt or dress  8 (18.6%)
You're forgetting the top (or are you?)!  1 (2.3%)
All depends on where they are going  3 (7%)
BR, you're feeding the Rule 34 people again aren't you?  23 (53.5%)

Total Voters: 43

Apparently most of you (and myself for the record) felt I was pandering to the Rule 34 crowd.  There's a good reason for that - I own stock in Kleenex and felt the need for a dividend...

Squick commencing in 3, 2, 1...

I felt sorry for Hanners here - she gets to deal with more filth befor 10AM than she probably dealt with in any previous week.

[Border Reiver]

No one expects the Spanish Inquisition!

[akronnick]

I certainly wasn't expecting it just now.

[Border Reiver]

Our cheif weapon is surprise, surprise and fear.

[akronnick]

Let me guess, ruthless efficiency?

[Border Reiver]

That comes later - and includes fanatical devotion for no additional charge!

[jwhouk]

This strip has me convinced of something: Jeph has something evil up his sleeve planned for Hanners.

Think of it this way - after having to deal with:

• Smelly customers
• Espresso machine overflow
• Coffee grounds spillage
• Drive-by Pastry splattering by Cosette
• Garbage bag tears
• Plunging in the Cave of 20 Asses

...something like Sex is going to seem like a walk in the park.

[kent_eh]

Hah!
My prediction for this story arc:

Hanners gets drunk on the date, and Sven is a perfect gentleman, even to the point of going thru some sort of physical damage, and public humiliation.
They have another date, which goes better, and he remains a perfect gentleman. This continues for a while, to the surprise of everyone.
Sven confesses to one of the guys late one night that he thinks she's "the one" for him.
Everyone gets angsty about it, but the happy couple have a long and happy relationship.


/what, it could happen.

[Akima]

What on earth is smelly dreadlock guy wearing on his head? And why is it so white and minty-fresh looking?
Poor Hanners... Excellently drawn comic; full of great facial expressions.

Oh, and best wishes for the Moon Festival* everyone. Don't eat too many Mooncakes!
祝大家中秋节快乐! 不要吃太多月饼!

*Officially, it is the Mid-Autumn Festival but that makes no sense in Australia, where it is Spring.

[Carl-E]

All this talk of Bloom County makes me want to see grown-up versions of Milo and Binkley walk in and order espressos.  >_>

Isn't that them in the first panel?  Binkley had an operation...


At this point, the least Dora could do is let Hanners change her shirt - customer relations, and all.  You don't want everyone wondering what bounced off her shirt and into their latte...

[themacnut]

I can see wanting to get good and drunk after a day like that (especially if it continues into the afternoon!). And if Sven gets drunk too...oh boy.

[raoullefere]

All this talk of Bloom County makes me want to see grown-up versions of Milo and Binkley walk in and order espressos.  >_>

Me, too. Dear old Bloom County, how we miss ye! And no, Outland and Opus were never really good substitutes.

Isn't that them in the first panel?  Binkley had an operation...

Can't believe Milo'd ever go the 'earthy' route.

At this point, the least Dora could do is let Hanners change her shirt - customer relations, and all.  You don't want everyone wondering what bounced off her shirt and into their latte...

I'm pretty sure there hasn't been time, since neither Penelope or Faye seem to be there and the rush is on. Too, despite her preparedness, I'm betting Hannelore didn't think to bring a change—or if she did, again, it would only get quickly soiled as well the way things are going. Better to save it until post-rush.

Weirdly enough, Hanner's question was mine on my first job, working at a grocery store (although I did wait until noon to ask). I was fifteen, and they'd hired me on the second of July. People getting foodstamps etc. + an oncoming holiday (in the U.S.) traditionally celebrated by gorging oneself and setting fire to things + the attendant sales = lines of shopping carts out into the aisles for about seven hours. I think the entire damn county shopped at our store that day.

That comes later - and includes fanatical devotion for no additional charge!

Along with nice red uniforms, I assume.

[Moxie]

At this point, the least Dora could do is let Hanners change her shirt - customer relations, and all.  You don't want everyone wondering what bounced off her shirt and into their latte...

I'm pretty sure there hasn't been time, since neither Penelope or Faye seem to be there and the rush is on. Too, despite her preparedness, I'm betting Hannelore didn't think to bring a change—or if she did, again, it would only get quickly soiled as well the way things are going. Better to save it until post-rush.

This does seem mildly baffling. If it is just Dora, Hanners and Cosette, I'm wondering why Dora would do that. It makes sense to have them both there for training purposes, but once training is over, doesn't it make more sense to rotate the two of them in so there's two trained baristas and one new one on at a time? Seems like it'd be much less of a potential headache-causing scenario.

[themacnut]

Just because we haven't seen Faye or the other blonde chick w. glasses (I'm totally blanking on her name) doesn't mean they're not there. Jeph is focusing on Hanners after all.

[Border Reiver]

At this point, the least Dora could do is let Hanners change her shirt - customer relations, and all.  You don't want everyone wondering what bounced off her shirt and into their latte...

I'm pretty sure there hasn't been time, since neither Penelope or Faye seem to be there and the rush is on. Too, despite her preparedness, I'm betting Hannelore didn't think to bring a change—or if she did, again, it would only get quickly soiled as well the way things are going. Better to save it until post-rush.

This does seem mildly baffling. If it is just Dora, Hanners and Cosette, I'm wondering why Dora would do that. It makes sense to have them both there for training purposes, but once training is over, doesn't it make more sense to rotate the two of them in so there's two trained baristas and one new one on at a time? Seems like it'd be much less of a potential headache-causing scenario.

Bringing in both Faye and Pennelope in additon to Hanners and Cossette woudl be counterproductive on the salary front.  The two newbies are drawing minimum wage (most likely), and the other two are probably at Minimum wage + x, so that would more than double Dora's salary bill for that shift and still leave her with no one to work the later shifts (at least without overtime).  Based on my wife's experience as a store owner, the two experienced workers will be handling the later shift, and after these two are trained up, they'll be rotated into the mix.  Also, there probably isn't room behind the counter for 5.

[Is it cold in here?]

We've never seen a special with spinach in it.

I bet that would surprise Hannelore, if Dora bought spinach to put in lattes. She wouldn't expect that. But then,

Nobody expects the spinach acquisition.

[Kugai]

That comes later - and includes fanatical devotion for no additional charge!

And they bring their own

COMFY CHAIR

[Carl-E]

Nobody expects the spinach acquisition.

Well, that was certainly unexpected...

[Moxie]

At this point, the least Dora could do is let Hanners change her shirt - customer relations, and all.  You don't want everyone wondering what bounced off her shirt and into their latte...

I'm pretty sure there hasn't been time, since neither Penelope or Faye seem to be there and the rush is on. Too, despite her preparedness, I'm betting Hannelore didn't think to bring a change—or if she did, again, it would only get quickly soiled as well the way things are going. Better to save it until post-rush.

This does seem mildly baffling. If it is just Dora, Hanners and Cosette, I'm wondering why Dora would do that. It makes sense to have them both there for training purposes, but once training is over, doesn't it make more sense to rotate the two of them in so there's two trained baristas and one new one on at a time? Seems like it'd be much less of a potential headache-causing scenario.

Bringing in both Faye and Pennelope in additon to Hanners and Cossette woudl be counterproductive on the salary front.  The two newbies are drawing minimum wage (most likely), and the other two are probably at Minimum wage + x, so that would more than double Dora's salary bill for that shift and still leave her with no one to work the later shifts (at least without overtime).  Based on my wife's experience as a store owner, the two experienced workers will be handling the later shift, and after these two are trained up, they'll be rotated into the mix.  Also, there probably isn't room behind the counter for 5.

No, I meant like one shift is Dora, Faye, and Hanners. Then maybe it slows so Dora leaves. Next Penny comes in. Then Hanners leaves and Cosette comes in. Then Faye leaves. Having all 5 there at once would be a very bad business move, of course. I'm talking about rotating it so the the two newbies aren't both on at the same time.
(Since it seems like there's roughly 3 girls on the schedule at a time when it's busy, it makes sense to me that only one of those girls would be new, because it seems counterproductive to have two new girls on at a (probably) busy time.)

_{[Edit: bolded the part of my original quote that seemed to be missed]}

[akronnick]

Maybe this is a usually slow day that has become unexpectedly busy.

[Carl-E]

Maybe.  Then again, we're seeing this from Hanner's point of view - it may not really be that busy, but when you're working a new job, there's a definite increased busyness factor, as you do so many things for the first time. 

Or maybe it's just the time dilation effect around the Cosette Clumsiness Singularity! 

[jwhouk]

Just because we haven't seen Faye or the other blonde chick w. glasses (I'm totally blanking on her name) doesn't mean they're not there. Jeph is focusing on Hanners after all.

Rhymes with "Antelope."

[zagraf]

I continue to be delighted at how much progress Hanners has made in managing her OCD. Sure, she's scuzzed out and all, but remember when Marten merely joked about strewing garbage on her apartment floor and she went catatonic, with even Faye saying he'd gone too far? If the events in today's strip had happened to her back then (not that she would've applied for a CoD job then, but indulge me), she'd have ended up in the psychiatric ward for at least a few days.

[Border Reiver]

Nobody expects the spinach acquisition.

Well, that was certainly unexpected...

Somebody has to make the Saag Chicken

[Akima]

As regards Hanners new job... I only just noticed that COD is an anagram of OCD... Oh well, English is my second language; that is my excuse, and I'm sticking to it.

[Schmorgluck]

Not to sound douchey or pedantic, but there's something that has been mildly annoying me for quite a while: calling Hanners' issues "her OCDs" is inaccurate. She certainly has several kinds of OCDs, but her issues are not limited to that, and include at least some phobias. Now I aknowledge that this kind of simplification is par for the course in an informal conversation, but I felt the need to get that out of my chest.

[akronnick]

Hannelore is what the professionals* call one big heaping bowl of crazy.

If we had to list each and every one of her myriad dysfunctions, phobias and disorders every time we talked about her issues, there'd be so many walls of text we could secure the Northern border of China.




*I didn't say what kind of professionals.

[jwhouk]

Hanners IS the DSM-IV.

[Prince of Space]

Maybe this is a usually slow day that has become unexpectedly busy.

That would explain why there are no pastries in (what I'm assuming is) the bake case there.

 My manager would have my head if ours was ever completely empty. 

[Moxie]

Maybe.  Then again, we're seeing this from Hanner's point of view - it may not really be that busy, but when you're working a new job, there's a definite increased busyness factor, as you do so many things for the first time.

Oooo, true, hadn't thought of that! I like it even more than the unexpectedly busy one, though it could also be a combination of the two.

[raoullefere]

That would explain why there are no pastries in (what I'm assuming is) the bake case there.

 My manager would have my head if ours was ever completely empty.  

I think Cosette dropped them all in panel four.

If this was from Hanners' POV, though, it would explain those first two customers. At least I hope no one actually has flies buzzing round them due to filthiness. The yellow stench is another matter—used to deal with far too much of that, 'far too much' being 'any.' The girl is a very perky-looking stinker, though. Love how Jeph's profile skills have improved.

[Aristera]

Did any one else catch that panel 4 in in the middle of panel 3?

[Sorflakne]

Uh, wtf?  There's a tiny image of panel 4 in panel 3.  At first I thought it was just a piece of wall art but after taking a closer look, I believe it's an actual glitch.

[Zingoleb]

Man, I just came in here to say that you dickweasels.

Also panel four seems really jagged around the edges.

[Tergon]

Comic comic comic comic comic.  Glitchy comic, no less.  Lil' mini-comic is indeed there in panel 3, and panel 4 looks... off somehow.  Like a poorly-rendered MSPaint version of itself.

Aww.  Hanners is a hard worker who does really well but hates the job, and Cosette is enthusiastic and shit.  What we need is to combine a hybrid of the two!  We could call it Hannette.  The second hybrid who is shit at everything and scared of its own shadow will be named Cosselore.  Then later on, Hannette can go on a date with Sven while Cosselore goes home with Steve.  Steve survived the Tropical Volcano Lair and his time with Tortura, I'm sure he can handle whatever Cosselore can dish out.

Oh hello there Mister Red Bull, how are you today, I have drunk two of your brothers already but everything is so shiny I shall drink more of you.

[Random832]

Also the hand drawn speech bubbles are gone.

I can't tell the fonts apart, is it the old font too?

[Damien]

Did any one else catch that panel 4 in in the middle of panel 3?

You know, I did. And I also noticed the weird lines around Cosette and Hannelore in the last panel, and the off-center-ness of the text in the speech bubbles, and the hanging tails on some of the speech bubble edges.

Judging from his tweets, I think Jeph has been at a concert? And maybe threw this one up really quick before proofing?  His tweets are acting weird anyway; the latest one on the main comic site box doesn't match the most recent ones on his twitter page.

Hummmmm.....

Edit:  God-dang, the sniping you guys. >_<

[Heliphyneau]

All this talk of Bloom County makes me want to see grown-up versions of Milo and Binkley walk in and order espressos.  >_>

Me, too. Dear old Bloom County, how we miss ye! And no, Outland and Opus were never really good substitutes.

Agreed.  The spin-offs were cute and all, but nothing beats the original.  I still have my stuffed Opus from back in the day, though I don't know where the mini-tequila bottle I had tucked under his wing got to.  Perhaps it was stolen by a rogue cactus . . .

Nobody expects the spinach acquisition.

AAAAaaaaahhhhgfgrblrgrthmfthgr . . .  Ow.  That hurt my brain.  In retaliation, I now demand that you say my name out loud.

>_>

And woo, new strip!  Guess Cosette's not having a great day either.  Faye's presence at CoD is confirmed, but I wish I could read the board better (is it "Spank the employee"?).  Also, I think there's some kind of weird error, because I can see a tiny replica of panel 4 under Dora's speech bubble in panel 3.  Perhaps the webcomic gods are telling Jeph not to stop hand-drawing the speech bubbles?  Hmm . . .

Bah, ninja'ed by several of you whilst typing this.

*posts anyway*