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Author Topic: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines  (Read 20263 times)

Professor Snuggles

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Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« on: 28 Dec 2010, 22:37 »
(to a woman of color) Hey baby, was your daddy a UPS Driver? Cuz since I met you I've been wondering what brown can do for me.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #1 on: 28 Dec 2010, 22:38 »
Damn Girl, are you descended from one of the victims of the Donner party?

Because I would love to eat your ass.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #2 on: 28 Dec 2010, 22:38 »
Did your daddy run a failed Mule Train?

Cuz your ass is out of control.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #3 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:38 »
Not to be blunt, but your daddy's name must be swisher, cuz damn girl you sweet.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #4 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:38 »
Does your dad work for BP? Because I'm thinking he could help us clean up the oil spill after we do some drilling later tonight.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #5 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:39 »
Is your dad a detective?

Cuz you look like you know a lot about dicks.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #6 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:39 »
Is your daddy a hangman?

Cuz I'd love to choke you while we fuck.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #7 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:40 »
Is your dad a pedophile?

Cuz he touched me when I was little.

I'm still in therapy.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #8 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:41 »
(to a black woman) Are you a descendent of thomas Jefferson having sex with a slave?

Cuz you kinda fuck like a white girl.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #9 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:41 »
Were you molested as a child?

Would you like some candy?

It's in my van.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #10 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:41 »
Is your brother a bully?

Cuz I want him to beat up my throat.

With his dick.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #11 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:42 »
Did your grandparents survive the holocaust?

Cuz you're really skinny.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #12 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:43 »
Do you enjoy the philosophy of Friedrich Nietzsche?

Cuz I want to Ubermunch your cunt.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #13 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:44 »
Did your father run a kennel?

Cuz honestly you're kind of a bitch.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #14 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:45 »
Your dad must have hated all your childhood pets.

Cuz I get the impression you're used to your pussy getting killed.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #15 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:46 »
Do you have a rape fantasy?

Because otherwise this is gonna be a violation of my parole.
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Professor Snuggles

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #16 on: 28 Dec 2010, 23:46 »
 :wink:
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imagist42

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #17 on: 29 Dec 2010, 00:50 »


Who's your daddy?
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Quote from: Yunior on 08 May 2011, 11:23
Hopefully it goes without saying but you should always ask before sticking things in people's butts

imagist42

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #18 on: 29 Dec 2010, 00:52 »
Seriously though have you had paternal relationship issues because I was consistently surprised when I saw how many "your daddy" jokes you kept coming.
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Quote from: Yunior on 08 May 2011, 11:23
Hopefully it goes without saying but you should always ask before sticking things in people's butts

Johnny C

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #19 on: 29 Dec 2010, 01:20 »
Hey baby, what's your sign? Oh yeah? Well where's the birth certificate
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est

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #20 on: 29 Dec 2010, 01:34 »
Hey baby your mother must have been an angel, 'cos daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn.
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calenlass

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #21 on: 29 Dec 2010, 02:21 »
It's good that you work this soul-killing retail/server/sales job because I think your frustrations with life make you so much better in bed.
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Quote from: Inlander on 16 Feb 2011, 01:32
Hey everyone, I need to buy some new bookshelves. When I get back from Ikea and put them together you're all invited to the bookshelf launch party.

David_Dovey

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #22 on: 29 Dec 2010, 07:33 »
Hey baby do you like rape jokes because here are some
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Quote from: Ozymandias on 17 Mar 2011, 10:24
It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

David_Dovey

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #23 on: 29 Dec 2010, 07:34 »
Hey baby was your mother an alcoholic because you have many of the signifying characteristics of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome
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Quote from: Ozymandias on 17 Mar 2011, 10:24
It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

David_Dovey

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #24 on: 29 Dec 2010, 07:35 »
Hey baby can I pay you money to have sex with me
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Quote from: Ozymandias on 17 Mar 2011, 10:24
It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

David_Dovey

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #25 on: 29 Dec 2010, 07:37 »
Hey baby was your daddy Julian Assange because I want to have sex with you without a condom
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Quote from: Ozymandias on 17 Mar 2011, 10:24
It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

David_Dovey

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #26 on: 29 Dec 2010, 07:38 »
Also take a leak on you
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Quote from: Ozymandias on 17 Mar 2011, 10:24
It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

David_Dovey

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #27 on: 29 Dec 2010, 07:38 »
 :wink:
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Quote from: Ozymandias on 17 Mar 2011, 10:24
It's a roasted cocoa bean, commonly found in vaginas.

Nodaisho

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #28 on: 29 Dec 2010, 09:20 »
How do you mix up R Kelly and Julian Assange?
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tania

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #29 on: 29 Dec 2010, 09:36 »
get in the van or i'll fucking kill you
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Quote from: tuathal on 01 Apr 2011, 11:40
Not to sound mysoginist, but I hate women.

Christophe

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #30 on: 29 Dec 2010, 10:05 »
Some people like to objectify women. I like to womanize objects.
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Johnny C

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #31 on: 29 Dec 2010, 10:09 »
Quote from: tania on 29 Dec 2010, 09:36
get in the van or i'll fucking kill you

get out of my dreams and get into the van
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[02:12] yuniorpocalypse: let's talk about girls
[02:12] Thug In Kitchen: nooo

Johnny C

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #32 on: 29 Dec 2010, 10:10 »
are you from tennessee? oh. you look like a backwater hick with bell's palsy or something. figured i'd ask
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[02:12] yuniorpocalypse: let's talk about girls
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Johnny C

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #33 on: 29 Dec 2010, 10:10 »
do you come here often? i do. i'm coming right now
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[02:12] yuniorpocalypse: let's talk about girls
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Johnny C

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #34 on: 29 Dec 2010, 10:11 »
i'll give you thirty bucks to drink this glass full of my piss
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ZJGent

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #35 on: 29 Dec 2010, 10:19 »
what's a lovely girl like you doing in a place like this?

... oh. you're a man.

what a coincidence, so am I. We should fuck.
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Johnny C

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #36 on: 29 Dec 2010, 11:24 »
everyone clear the fuck out and give roddy some space, let a master have room in his studio
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est

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #37 on: 29 Dec 2010, 15:27 »
I dunno man, Tania's one actually made me laugh out loud.  Maybe they should fight?
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est

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #38 on: 29 Dec 2010, 15:30 »
Man, now you got me thinking about a THUNDERDOME thread/area where condemned boarders go to have a post-off, then we have a poll and the loser is banned.

TWO MEN ENTER, ONE MAN LEAVE
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est

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #39 on: 29 Dec 2010, 15:32 »
Co-incidentally, that would have been a great headline to announce the first successful male-female trans op.
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tania

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #40 on: 29 Dec 2010, 15:33 »
Quote from: est on 29 Dec 2010, 15:27
I dunno man, Tania's one actually made me laugh out loud.  Maybe they should fight?

to be fair i've used this same pickup line like, eight times since i have been on this board but it's just such a classic (for anyone interested it's also got a phenomenal success rate)
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Quote from: tuathal on 01 Apr 2011, 11:40
Not to sound mysoginist, but I hate women.

vegkitkat

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #41 on: 29 Dec 2010, 15:45 »
Quote from: David_Dovey on 29 Dec 2010, 07:35
Hey baby can I pay you money to have sex with me

Of course, good sir.
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Lummer

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #42 on: 29 Dec 2010, 15:45 »
If you weren't a filthy Jew I'd totally bone you.
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Der Golem

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #43 on: 29 Dec 2010, 17:01 »
Your dad must've inseminated your mother.
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KharBevNor

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #44 on: 29 Dec 2010, 18:40 »
Quote from: est on 29 Dec 2010, 15:30
TWO MEN ENTER, ONE MAN LEAVE

ME TARZAN, YOU FUCKHOLE
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[22:25] Dovey: i don't get sigquoted much
[22:26] Dovey: like, maybe, 4 or 5 times that i know of?
[22:26] Dovey: and at least one of those was a blatant ploy at getting sigquoted

http://panzerdivisio

Demonic Angel

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #45 on: 29 Dec 2010, 19:26 »
I've just shit my pants, can I get into yours?
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Demonic Angel

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #46 on: 29 Dec 2010, 19:28 »
Can I kill you? I really prefer to fuck the freshly dead.
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Ozymandias

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #47 on: 29 Dec 2010, 20:11 »
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Inlander

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #48 on: 29 Dec 2010, 20:18 »
Wrong thread, dude.

Or is this stare-duck thing just popping up everywhere now, I dunno.
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scarred

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Re: Thread Where We Make Up Horribly Offensive Pick Up Lines
« Reply #49 on: 29 Dec 2010, 21:45 »
I thought he was just implying that flashing a woman your Psyduck would be enough to weaken her knees.
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