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Teachers Be Crazy

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Lunchbox:
As inspired by a tweet from manly friendly man @ryanpequin:

let's all take a minute to remember some crazy unprofessional bullshit that one of our elementary schoolteachers did or said

My fourth grade teacher was ancient and angry. She would rap us on the knuckles with rulers. One day she was standing on a desk to hang something from the ceiling and a ceiling fan blade whapped her on the head and she fell down and we all laughed because we hated her so much.
She also made me sit next to the worst boy in the class. One day he vomited all over himself and our desk (and my books) and she wouldn't let him get up until she had finished the lesson.

My boyfriend tells the story of a teacher she had who would hand out lollies to the class - after she had picked all the good ones out of the packet for herself.

Lunchbox:
My Year 9 English teacher would tell stories about her family life without remembering that her daughter was in the class. Her daughter would also address her by her Teacher Name every time she spoke in class. Awkward.

JD:
My 10th grade math teacher dropkicked one of his students. I had switched out of the class at that point, (he was a pretty awful teacher) but I never saw him again.

Eris:
My teacher from year four was hilarious. My first few years of education were at a tiny one teacher school (there was about eight children in total), where the teacher was my father. In 1997 I moved to a normal sized primary school and experienced lots of children! Swearing! Bullying! Different teachers! It was a completely different world I had never experienced.

My teacher that year was Mr Brien. He was over 6' tall, so from the perspective of a very small 10 year old he was a giant. Straight up giant teaching me things. When I first started there I would be super eager to learn and do my work quickly, and would promptly let him know when I was done, generally a fair while before the rest of me class. To keep me occupied he would get me to organise his bookshelves and cupboards. I learned fairly quickly to take my time with my work after that.

We had one "problem" girl in our class. Renee. She had ADD and would very rarely take her medication. Normally we would just try to not pay attention to her and get on with the class, but sometimes, children being jerks, we would get her worked up so we wouldn't have to do any work. One day in our weekly French lesson we did just that, which resulted in her grabbing a girl by the hair and refusing to let go. Eventually Mr Brien got called in and he had to forcibly take her to the principal's office. He did this by throwing her over his shoulder and carrying her out of class. She still held onto little Annie Graham's hair. The image of a Giant man carrying an hysterical small girl out of the room while an even smaller girl scurried after them being dragged by the hair is something I will never forget.

pen:
My 7th grade teacher was an alcoholic who tried to cover her vodka by drinking out of a sprite can.  She was caught and fired.

My 6th grade substitute (who was there most of the year) didn't really know how to do anything, so we ended up getting square dancing lessons every day.  I remember most of the class hating it, but I thought it was pretty awesome. 

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