Topic: QC Captions Vol. 135 (Read 8653 times)

iduguphergrave · « **on:** 06 Oct 2013, 10:18 »

Heya folks. Hope everyone's having a mellow day; if not, I'm sure Tai can help you out:

*koff* Enjoy

celticgeek · « **Reply #1 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 12:27 »

Claire: I just scored a lid of Panama Red.
Tai: I'll fire up the bong.

K1dmor · « **Reply #2 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 12:57 »

Claire: I don't understand why you like Adventure Time.
Tai: You'll do in a minute.

DSL · « **Reply #3 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 13:08 »

CLAIRE: "OK, Marten's working for you, Dora's dating you, and you have one more wish."
TAI: "I wish you'd get back in this bottle."

ankhtahr · « **Reply #4 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 13:32 »

Claire: Is it okay if I invite Hannelore too? She's nice!
Tai: Sure, but in that case I'll go and find the disinfectant for her which we keep for the copying machines.

Border Reiver · « **Reply #5 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 18:41 »

Claire: "Tai, can I ask you a personal question?"

Tai: "Yes, you can. And you totally should."

~~cesariojpn~~ · « **Reply #6 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 21:13 »

Claire: So what should I do on our next date?
Tai: Ask Marten, he could teach you a thing or two. He did show me how to use rope to tie people up for pleasure.

Is it cold in here? · « **Reply #7 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 21:45 »

Quote from: DSL on 06 Oct 2013, 13:08

CLAIRE: "OK, Marten's working for you, Dora's dating you, and you have one more wish."
TAI: "I wish you'd get back in this bottle."

I'll never top that.

WAYF · « **Reply #8 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 21:49 »

Just in case anyone forgot that DSL is the greatest.

Mmeaninglessnamee · « **Reply #9 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 22:16 »

Claire: I don't know what exactly is in that bong, but it's the same color as my shirt.
Tai: I though I was high, but I'm not the one talking about wearing a bong as a shirt.

or
Tai: I can prove you're a genie, your shirt's the same color as the bottle you came from.

[I just can't unsee the colors being the same now.]

cesium133 · « **Reply #10 on:** 06 Oct 2013, 22:23 »

Claire: Why is the water in your bong blue? Does the marijuana turn it that color?
Tai: I don't use this for marijuana, I use this for Heisenberg Blue Meth. How do you think I have the energy to do all the work in this place when you're running off with Marten?

(I have no idea if you can actually smoke meth through a bong, and I have no plans to find out)
(Apologies to anyone who doesn't get it because they haven't seen Breaking Bad)
(Oh, and meth would give you energy, but you'd do lousy work on it, so I don't recommend it as a way of improving your efficiency. Plus it kills you.

)

techkid · « **Reply #11 on:** 07 Oct 2013, 04:01 »

Claire: "Why are you cleaning your bong, anyway?"
Tai: "Hannelore is coming around for a hit, and this needs to be spotless before she gets here."

FunkyTuba · « **Reply #12 on:** 07 Oct 2013, 12:04 »

Quote from: Is it cold in here? on 06 Oct 2013, 21:45

Quote from: DSL on 06 Oct 2013, 13:08
CLAIRE: "OK, Marten's working for you, Dora's dating you, and you have one more wish."
TAI: "I wish you'd get back in this bottle."
I'll never top that.

Agree. Nice.

Zebediah · « **Reply #13 on:** 07 Oct 2013, 12:19 »

Claire: "Emily says we have a whole book on Victorian bongs."

Tai: "Yeah, that's how she got the way she is."

RedWolf4 · « **Reply #14 on:** 07 Oct 2013, 14:03 »

Claire: "So hey, listen, thanks for letting me get a few hits off that before I went for my piercings."

Tai: "Don't thank me just yet, all you were smoking was harmless tobacco. Because you see Claire, you had it in you all along. . . "

Carl-E · « **Reply #15 on:** 08 Oct 2013, 00:24 »

Quote from: RedWolf4 on 07 Oct 2013, 14:03

harmless tobacco.

Oxymoron.

iduguphergrave · « **Reply #16 on:** 09 Oct 2013, 15:38 »

I still lol'd. NEXT PANEL:

Also notice the blackboard is blank. What's she gonna write???

Zebediah · « **Reply #17 on:** 09 Oct 2013, 15:54 »

Hannelore: "Yes, I modified the cash register myself to make it easier to use!"

Dale: "Why does it only have prime numbers?"

DSL · « **Reply #18 on:** 09 Oct 2013, 15:56 »

HANNERS: "Helb."
DALE: "What."

celticgeek · « **Reply #19 on:** 09 Oct 2013, 16:01 »

Hanners: You will notice that the pricing follows the fibonacci sequence.
Dale: Okay...

Hanners will write: Ask Dale for helb with the Secret Menu!

PintsizeForPresident · « **Reply #20 on:** 09 Oct 2013, 23:50 »

HANNERS: So, how many babies are Marigold and you going to have?
DALE: I dunno, what is a reasonable number?

DSL · « **Reply #21 on:** 10 Oct 2013, 03:36 »

HANNERS: "... So, anyway, I was thinking you and Francis could battle to the death for the chance to have a reasonable number of babies with Marigold. I could train you in the ways of the broadsword, fighting spoon and battle spatula. Maybe even the war ladle. Marten can show you how to wield the souffle pan."
DALE: "What."
HANNERS: "Francis will probably use the space station's laser and a security droid."

ChaoSera · « **Reply #22 on:** 10 Oct 2013, 03:43 »

I'm kinda late for the party, but I gotta get this one out there.

Claire: "It cleans the Bong, or else it gets the hose again."
Tai: "Oh yeah, give me the hose!"

On the new one:
Hanners: "Hey Dale! Why are you staring at the cash register?"
Dale: "Faye told me I have to find the Buttons for the secret menu until the end of my shift, or else she'll break my knee caps."

Border Reiver · « **Reply #23 on:** 10 Oct 2013, 04:11 »

Hanners: "!?!?"

Dale: "Gary? Long time no see buddy. Are you free after 5, I'd like to catch up with you after my shift's over."

PintsizeForPresident · « **Reply #24 on:** 10 Oct 2013, 07:07 »

DALE: I think I broke the register. Is it supposed to say <Out of Cheese Error>?
HANNERS: Yeah, it does that all the time. Just threaten it with the broadsword and it will work fine.

DSL · « **Reply #25 on:** 10 Oct 2013, 07:28 »

HANNERS: "Oh, just hit the 'back' button. Not sure who thought Internet-based cash registers would be a good idea."
DALE: "This Ginny-Hermione fan fiction is ... interesting. I'd hate to run into the author."

BLACKBOARD: "Kitties:)"

Pilchard123 · « **Reply #26 on:** 10 Oct 2013, 09:29 »

Quote from: PintsizeForPresident on 10 Oct 2013, 07:07

DALE: I think I broke the register. Is it supposed to say <Out of Cheese Error>?
HANNERS: Yeah, it does that all the time. Just threaten it with the broadsword and it will work fine.

+++Error At Address: 14, Treacle Mine Road, Ankh-Morpork+++

PintsizeForPresident · « **Reply #27 on:** 10 Oct 2013, 10:07 »

HANNERS: To get the daily total, turn the key to "2", input the code *83571# while standing on one leg, then hit it really hard with a hammer. Whatever you do, don't push the red button.
DALE: Yeah I know. These things all work the same.

Specials: Nuclear Winter!

techkid · « **Reply #28 on:** 11 Oct 2013, 04:22 »

Dale: "Um... Just hypothetically, if I do press the red button, hypothetically mind you... what does it do?"
Hannelore: "Well, last time it was pressed, Pintsize woke up from his nap. Dora had to cancel the wedding and everything!"

Blackboard: Specials - The "Sleepbreaker" Quintuple Espresso

RedWolf4 · « **Reply #29 on:** 11 Oct 2013, 06:09 »

Dale: "Ummm. . . the cash register is asking if. . . if I want to play a game?"

Hanners: "FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SAY NO!!!"

Todays specials: Szilard Shots and Fatboy Lattes.

DrBear · « **Reply #30 on:** 11 Oct 2013, 15:27 »

Quote from: techkid on 11 Oct 2013, 04:22

Dale: "Um... Just hypothetically, if I do press the red button, hypothetically mind you... what does it do?"
Hannelore: "Well, last time it was pressed, Pintsize woke up from his nap. Dora had to cancel the wedding and everything!"

Blackboard: Specials - The "Sleepbreaker" Quintuple Espresso

I never realized until now that that robot was Pintsize.

techkid · « **Reply #31 on:** 12 Oct 2013, 01:06 »

It took me a couple of times to see it, myself...

WAYF · « **Reply #32 on:** 12 Oct 2013, 18:23 »

SPECIALS: Climb Mt. Dale today for your chance to win an approving smirk!

DALE: I feel like the prizes should be better...

HANNELORE: This is as generous as Dora gets. I'm actually excited about winning it!

Masterpiece · « **Reply #33 on:** 13 Oct 2013, 02:14 »

Mt Dale?
Dale is not amused

Thrudd · « **Reply #34 on:** 17 Oct 2013, 07:05 »

Hanners: Wow! Just like in the movies! Are you going to take over our planet? Are ya? Huh? Are ya? Are ya? Are ya?
Dale: Gee, no! I just wanna stay here and have fun.

Hanners: Now, every time Sureluck Jones wanted to find something, the first thing he did was find some clues. Follow me! The game is afoot!
Dale: How are we going to find the key to the register if all you want to do is play foot games?

Hammers: That was a close one. Are you OK Dale?
Dale: Yeah. Luckily it landed on my head.

Sorry, but for some reason I keep thinking about old school chip and dale

THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

Author Topic: QC Captions Vol. 135 (Read 8653 times)