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[Pilchard123]

That reminds me of a joke.

Back in the 1860's a ship's captain was conducting battle against another vessel. When the enemy boat was undefeated after all canon and rifle ammunition had been used, he ordered his helmsman to ram them with the front of the boat. With a good wind, they were able to cripple their enemy but the crew remained fighting. Not wishing to risk his men's lives in sword fighting, he ordered that the enemy were cut down with arrows. Alas, when all of these were expended one lone enemy combatant remained and refused to yield. Clearly the man was determined and would fight bitterly to the last. So he summoned his bosun and commanded he take the cabin boy's fiddle and advance on their lone adversary while playing a jig. The bosun, a man with clumsy, broad fingers and ears ruined by years of canon fire rendered such a terrible tune that swiftly the forlorn sailor of the other ship threw down his sword and begged for mercy.

It was an Add Homonym attack.

I... don't get it.

[cesium133]

(click to show/hide)

Add Homonym is a homonym of 'ad hominem'

[LTK]

That much is obvious. I still don't get it.

[Pilchard123]

I got that far, but I don't get why that's funny.

(click to show/hide)

Possibly because they fought 'to the [last] man', but it's a bit of a stretch.

[Method of Madness]

I'm also lost.

[Caspian Sea Monster]

I really like sourdough.  Like, I really like sourdough.

Today Emoroffle and I went to the grocery store.  There's a rack in the pastry section where the bakery puts out all the fresh breads they bake during the day, and I really wanted some sourdough for sammiches.  I spent like two minutes walking around the rack unable to find the sourdough, before Emo pointed it out to me, because apparently I'm blind - it's not a very big rack.  Right at that moment there was a man walking toward the breads - I was facing him as he approached from the opposite side of the rack - and he seemed to be walking with purpose.  Then he stopped dead in his tracks as I picked up the loaf and said to Emo, "Oh, is this the last one?"  With a dejected expression, he turned and walked away.

It took me a few seconds to register what exactly had happened, and then I felt really bad about it.  I thought about chasing after him and being like, "Sorry, did you want this?"  But I'm pretty sure he saw me stick my face into the bag to take a big whiff because oh god it smells so good, and I figured after that he probably didn't want it.  And while I do feel bad about it, on the other hand, mah sourdough.

This has nothing to do with naval warfare or add homonym attacks.  Sorry if you feel mislead.

[Method of Madness]

More like misbread, am I right?

(click to show/hide)

I am not right.

[The Seldom Killer]

I got that far, but I don't get why that's funny.

(click to show/hide)

Possibly because they fought 'to the [last] man', but it's a bit of a stretch.

(click to show/hide)

First the captain used the bow of the boat, then ordered use of bows and finally deployed use of a fiddle which is played with a bow.

[LTK]

They say explaining the joke kills it, but I think this one was already dead to start with.

[The Seldom Killer]

I'm just glad I didn't claim it was a funny joke. It'll only amuse pun obsessed assholes like me.

[cesium133]

I thought it was punny, but I guess I'm an asshole.

[chaospersonified]

Not having reliable Wi-fi seriously sucks. I hate it

[chaospersonified]

I snorted at that joke. In this modern life, that is the equivalent of a sincere LOL, I think

[Method of Madness]

I still don't fucking get it.

[chaospersonified]

Madness:

(click to show/hide)

bow of ship, bow and arrow, bow of a fiddle, all homonyms. They kept adding homonyms, then played off of ad hominem

Not the best, kinda over-complicated. Puns don't work so well when you dance around the word things have in common. Not the most well-thought-out joke, I kinda feel they were trying too hard to be extra clever.

[Method of Madness]

Oh.

[chaospersonified]

It's way more complicated than it needs to be. I needed an explanation because I'm unfamiliar with fucking VIOLIN structural terms. This joke requires people being familiar with nautical terminology,longstanding hunting devices, and the different parts of certain string instruments, then asks them to make connection between a Latin term used to describe certain fallacious arguments and a generic phrase meaning 'to increase the number of words that sound similar to one another.'

Having said all that, it's insane to expect this one to soar over something like 98% of the population's head. My snorting was less from feeling humored than it was at the sheer absurdity that this effing pun was so meticulously crafted.

[jwhouk]

...Hey, where'd that brick come from?

[chaospersonified]

...Hey, where'd that brick come from?

Guantanamo Bay. The story behind its travel to this location is top secret and very shady

[Detachable Felix]

I got to ban my first douchebag from my official page on facebook. Had to google "how to ban a user" because I am derp 

[Method of Madness]

So does "Netflix and chill" mean "watch half an episode of Parks and Rec before fucking" or is even that much pretense not bothered with?

[SubaruStephen]

And is Netflix a requirement, or can Hulu or Amazon Instant Video be substituted? What about Blu-ray? DVD? VHS?

[The Seldom Killer]

I though "Netflix and chill" was just fucking and didn't require any Parks and Rec. I think it's the new "I've got a friend coming over to do some homework" to serve the post-college era.

[explicit]

Do other people fuck to Parks and Rec, too? Is it, like, playing Barry White in the background nowadays? 90% of my fucking has parks and rec on in the background. Loudly.

[Method of Madness]

And is Netflix a requirement, or can Hulu or Amazon Instant Video be substituted? What about Blu-ray? DVD? VHS?

You can Netflix and chill, Hulu and hang, or Amazon and masturbate whilst crying.

[cesium133]

I though "Netflix and chill" was just fucking and didn't require any Parks and Rec. I think it's the new "I've got a friend coming over to do some homework" to serve the post-college era.

Is THAT what that means!? No wonder nobody responded to my OKCupid profile.

[explicit]

HBOgo and blow?

[Method of Madness]

I like how blow is at least a triple entendre.

[94ssd]

I like how blow is at least a triple entendre.

TYBALT: Gentlemen, good e'en. A word with one of you.
MERCUTIO: And but one word with one of us? Couple it with something. Make it a word and a blow.
TYBALT: You shall find me apt enough to that, sir, an you will give me occasion.

[chaospersonified]

I like how blow is at least a triple entendre.

TYBALT: Gentlemen, good e'en. A word with one of you.
MERCUTIO: And but one word with one of us? Couple it with something. Make it a word and a blow.
TYBALT: You shall find me apt enough to that, sir, an you will give me occasion.

Oh lordy. This gives their whole attitude towards each other a new angle.

[The Seldom Killer]

I want to make a post about the allegation that our Prime Minister had sex with a dead pig but can't decide where it should go.

Headline Thread or Miscellaneous TV thread?

[Thrillho]

Headline thread because you're not actually posting about Black Mirror.

Unless you're just cracking a joke, in which case uh... 

[Detachable Felix]

I want to make a post about the allegation that our Prime Minister had sex with a dead pig but can't decide where it should go.


Headline Thread or Miscellaneous TV thread?

The internet is just going to town on this.
Exhibit A: Simpsons pictures that I gone and done:


Exhibit B:

[Method of Madness]

#Bacongazi

[The Seldom Killer]

#baeofpigs is my current favourite hashtag.

[Method of Madness]

Yeah, that's definitely better than mine. I've been pushing -gazi to replace -gate though because fuck -gate.

[The Seldom Killer]

Brookers original of #snoutrage is getting woefully low usage though.

[Method of Madness]

I don't know who Brooker is.

[The Seldom Killer]

Charlie Brooker wrote a TV series called Black Mirror. There been a couple of seasons that I would heartily recommend watching. In the first episode, the Prime Minister is blackmailed into having sex with a live pig on TV.

[Method of Madness]

Oh, I've seen Black Mirror. Fifteen Million Merits is possibly my favorite hour of television ever. I just didn't know who wrote it.

[The Seldom Killer]

Him and his wife Konnie Huq.

Of course comparisons to National Anthem are drawing some criticisms as the fictional one did it for a good cause while the real one did it just so he could be a shitehawk at the dinner table.

What really tickles me about this is that someone in the great machine that is the Number 10 PR office, someone today will have had to go up to David Cameron and ask, against the eventuality of evidence surfacing, whether "the pig thing is true". And then after that ridiculously unpleasant discussion, I imagine the wincing, gagging, nauseating disgust with which they will have to ask whether he actually got stoned with James Delingpole and listen to Supertramp. Although we should be grateful to Cameron for what is a brilliant question for a game of Would You Rather...

[Method of Madness]

Sure, it's gross, but the pig was already dead, it's not animal cruelty. So...who cares?

[The Seldom Killer]

That's a fair point.

However, I will say this.

This didn't happen on a farm, or in an abbatoir or a butchery. It didn't, as far as I can tell, even happen in a university laboratory. So now you have a group of rich, overprivileged men who will procure a pigs head just for the lulz of a debasing initiation ceremony. And then we also have a man of the type of character to bow to their, by your own words, gross whim in order to gain their approval. This is the man who currently runs our country. I care about that a bit.

[Method of Madness]

Yeah, if he did it now sure, but he was in uni when he did it, so I'm assuming he was pretty much a kid. Lots of people have done far worse to be accepted, and no person or animal was hurt (I'm assuming the pig was being slaughtered anyway and they acquired the head after the fact).

My point is there are plenty of reasons to not like David Cameron, and it kind of annoys me that an ultimately harmless thing from his uni days will probably overshadow the shit he's doing now.

[Thrillho]

The larger issue you can take away from it, if it helps, is that he gave a very disturbing speech after his re-election in which he basically implied that he was going to stop leaving people alone if they weren't breaking the law. Basically, the strong implication was that anything against the 'morals' of his party was going to make you a target of government oppression, and given the 'clean' values the Tories generally try to lean on, this kind of fucking about at university doesn't exactly fit his party line. The argument could be made for hypocrisy.

Failing that, sure there's a shitload of things that we should dislike him for more, but those don't make him squirm as much.

[Method of Madness]

Ahh yeah, ok. So it'd be like when a homophobic Republican congressman* here gets caught visiting gay prostitutes. Yeah, I get it, then.

*I'm pretty sure this has happened several times

[BeoPuppy]

And the world is a better place when it does.

[94ssd]

I like how blow is at least a triple entendre.

TYBALT: Gentlemen, good e'en. A word with one of you.
MERCUTIO: And but one word with one of us? Couple it with something. Make it a word and a blow.
TYBALT: You shall find me apt enough to that, sir, an you will give me occasion.

Oh lordy. This gives their whole attitude towards each other a new angle.

These two love double entendres and puns.

TYBALT: Mercutio, thou consort'st with Romeo [Consort meaning 'associate with,' but also implying that the two have a special relationship]

MERCUTIO: Consort? What, dost thou make us minstrels? [the third meaning of 'consort', a group of musicians] An' thou make minstrels of us, look to hear nothing but discords. Here’s my fiddlestick [his sword]. Here’s that shall make you dance.

[chaospersonified]

I like how blow is at least a triple entendre.

TYBALT: Gentlemen, good e'en. A word with one of you.
MERCUTIO: And but one word with one of us? Couple it with something. Make it a word and a blow.
TYBALT: You shall find me apt enough to that, sir, an you will give me occasion.

Oh lordy. This gives their whole attitude towards each other a new angle.

These two love double entendres and puns.

TYBALT: Mercutio, thou consort'st with Romeo [Consort meaning 'associate with,' but also implying that the two have a special relationship]

MERCUTIO: Consort? What, dost thou make us minstrels? [the third meaning of 'consort', a group of musicians] An' thou make minstrels of us, look to hear nothing but discords. Here’s my fiddlestick [his sword]. Here’s that shall make you dance.

See, I caught the implication that they were together, but I was unaware of the connection between 'consort' and 'group of musicians.' I've never heard that particular definition, I presume it's pronounced as CON-sort, as opposed to con-SORT, Tybalt using the second while Mercutio uses the second? That works with the rhythm of the words, which is what I love about Shakespeare.

The words themselves sometimes go over my head, their usage anyway. I've got a big vocabulary, I'm familiar with them, but the way he uses them does pass me by from time to time. Consort as a musical group being an example of that.

[pwhodges]

Here's a modern example of the usage.