Comic Discussion > QUESTIONABLE CONTENT
WCDT 2902-2906 (23-27 February 2015)
swapna:
--- Quote from: Meilu on 25 Feb 2015, 15:40 ---[took my quote out for brevity]
Forgive any spelling or grammar mistakes, and lack of coherence... still no computer.
I have several alcoholics in my family. My sister was clean for years simply by virtue of it not being around and her inability to leave her house alone to purchase it (an entirely separate issue, but I digress). The moment that changed, without hesitation and self-control, she immediately descended into a drunken stupor. It was literally the forst thing she did. The fact that she was the sole caretaker of a 7 year old child didn't even matter. Addiction literally is a crippling disease for some people, and some of those people have to have some sort of support like that for theor own good. That I live over a thousand miles from my sister (though her refusal to talk to me due to my trans status likely wouldn't change if the distance were less significant) and cannot support her personally haunts me daily. I'm not at all saying that it's the same situation. Clearly it is not. However, Faye has obvious alcoholic tendencies. That she was strong enough to pour it down the sink is awesome. Deliberate avoidance and lack of opportunity to fall back into the habit are key strategies to surviving the addiction. My father did (though his situation was entirely different as well). It doesn't just take strength to be around something you are addicted to and NOT use it... it takes strength, will, and almost super-human dedication. Time away helps, but sometimes even that isn't enough.
But having supported many people through this (without something like AA) I know Faye is handling herself the right way and not overreacting at all. She should talk to her therapist, that much is true. Her friends stopping her for her own good? Definitely a good plan on her part. At least then she knows, when she eventually IS alone, she can do it because people love her enough to help her like that. Learning support is there is key.
--- End quote ---
As I said, it's very different experiences. Mine are just different than yours, and just as anecdotal. I've had to deal with alcoholics, too, and with that 'all or nothing pattern' I've learned to hate, and that 'but I'm powerless against my addiction'. I'm not saying that people should deal with all that shit on their own, on the contrary, but making a huge fuss/obsessing about it just makes it worse. From what I've seen, those that are most successful in stopping are those that either have a really strong motive, or people who just slowly quit and just don't go to extremes (any more). No excess drinking, but a beer doesn't hurt. And, the most important thing - solve or learn to deal with the huge-ass problem that drove them into addiction in the first place.
Rghfrgl:
I don't particularly see this week as that much a improvement over recent Clairiten at least. We had LOOM and at least on the Claire side I thought she said some interesting stuff(support groups, bad days, letting things work). Got to ease off on the trans subject for awhile I think, but last weeks was better than this weeks, even if I am glad to see Hanners again.
There's just higher expectations for Marten and Claire falling in love than Hanners and Faye falling in love...with textiles!
Meilu:
--- Quote from: swapna on 25 Feb 2015, 17:59 ---
--- Quote from: Meilu on 25 Feb 2015, 15:40 ---[took my quote out for brevity]
Forgive any spelling or grammar mistakes, and lack of coherence... still no computer.
I have several alcoholics in my family. My sister was clean for years simply by virtue of it not being around and her inability to leave her house alone to purchase it (an entirely separate issue, but I digress). The moment that changed, without hesitation and self-control, she immediately descended into a drunken stupor. It was literally the forst thing she did. The fact that she was the sole caretaker of a 7 year old child didn't even matter. Addiction literally is a crippling disease for some people, and some of those people have to have some sort of support like that for theor own good. That I live over a thousand miles from my sister (though her refusal to talk to me due to my trans status likely wouldn't change if the distance were less significant) and cannot support her personally haunts me daily. I'm not at all saying that it's the same situation. Clearly it is not. However, Faye has obvious alcoholic tendencies. That she was strong enough to pour it down the sink is awesome. Deliberate avoidance and lack of opportunity to fall back into the habit are key strategies to surviving the addiction. My father did (though his situation was entirely different as well). It doesn't just take strength to be around something you are addicted to and NOT use it... it takes strength, will, and almost super-human dedication. Time away helps, but sometimes even that isn't enough.
But having supported many people through this (without something like AA) I know Faye is handling herself the right way and not overreacting at all. She should talk to her therapist, that much is true. Her friends stopping her for her own good? Definitely a good plan on her part. At least then she knows, when she eventually IS alone, she can do it because people love her enough to help her like that. Learning support is there is key.
--- End quote ---
As I said, it's very different experiences. Mine are just different than yours, and just as anecdotal. I've had to deal with alcoholics, too, and with that 'all or nothing pattern' I've learned to hate, and that 'but I'm powerless against my addiction'. I'm not saying that people should deal with all that shit on their own, on the contrary, but making a huge fuss/obsessing about it just makes it worse. From what I've seen, those that are most successful in stopping are those that either have a really strong motive, or people who just slowly quit and just don't go to extremes (any more). No excess drinking, but a beer doesn't hurt. And, the most important thing - solve or learn to deal with the huge-ass problem that drove them into addiction in the first place.
--- End quote ---
That "I'm powerless against my addiction" thing: I think some people are. That others are not doesn't discount that. My father, for instance, was not. Every time I see him I'm reminded in some way of how strong of a person he is. But, as I pointed out, my sister is essentially ruled by her addiction, to the detriment of everything and everyone around her.
There's no one answer for fixing someone. Fixing the problem that led to the addiction doesn't necessarily fix the addiction, nor does fixing the addiction solve the issue that led to it. I would argue, however, that an addiction and the problems that causes makes it infinitely more difficult to solve the other issues.
Of course there are addicts who have no underlying issues as well.
jwhouk:
Comic!
1. I wonder if Winslow could upgrade himself to an iPad.
2. And there, bubbling just below the surface, is Angry Hanners.
SubaruStephen:
Took me a while to realize that was Winslow...
--- Quote from: jwhouk on 25 Feb 2015, 19:16 ---2. And there, bubbling just below the surface, is Angry Hanners.
--- End quote ---
No, that's Tough Love Hanners.
Angry Hanners wouldn't apologize, and then she'd storm off to sterilize something.
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