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Secrete burn lotion for the steamed milk injuries

3 (15.8%)

Coffee, to mix with the milk

3 (15.8%)

Chocolate milk

10 (52.6%)

Milkweed to attract butterflies

2 (10.5%)

Milk toast

0 (0%)

Copulating copper cop

1 (5.3%)

Total Members Voted: 19

[badbum61]

Internet Jerry sounds ever so slightly dodgy...so there's a decent chance Gallonsize's new chassis won't last the distance, and he'll have to re-inhabit his old one? 
</grasping at straws>

(sorry, no poll - I'll leave that to the more experienced thread starters)

[QuestionableIntentions]

See? Pintsize' form may change, but not his wacky highjinks.

I'm foreseeing humorous complications with that dodgy body.

Maybe it's been stolen?

[DaiJB]

So Pintsize buys bodies from the back of some guy's van - of course he does, what else would a Pintsize do? 

Ooo, I hope he did a good malware check first   

[Litch]

Wait! I want to find out more about Willow's Ass

[Farideh]

Knowing Pintsize he'd welcome some nice malware

[Gyrre]

I'm more concerned about Amazon Pete's clients and how he got his nickname.

[Perfectly Reasonable]

"old abandoned mall"  ( soundtrack gets creepy )

[shanejayell]

Somehow I'm not surprised. 

[cesium133]

I'm more concerned about Amazon Pete's clients and how he got his nickname.

I’m pretty sure Amazon Pete got that name because he sells on Amazon. My experience with Amazon recently suggests buying stuff from there is way sketchier than buying from a van in front of an abandoned mall.

[John Allenson]

Maybe Pintsize may want to have Bubbles check out his new chassis for issues.  Not Faye.

[_Islanio]

so there's a decent chance Gallonsize's new chassis won't last the distance

What if it's a stolen body, and the police comes after it? 

[hedgie]

Or, perhaps the body quickly dumped *by* a criminal evading the cops?

[Torlek]

Or, perhaps the body quickly dumped *by* a criminal evading the cops?

Now you've opened up the can of worms in which reside the civil forfeiture laws..."This body may have been involved in the commission of a criminal act so it is being confiscated as state's evidence."

[Farideh]

New comic.

I can understand the appeal of the jiggle testing machine. We recently bought a robot vacuum that also mops, and seeing the device shake its behind while it's mopping is hilarious

[Gnabberwocky]

Where does one acquire a dildo ballista? Asking for a friend.

[awkwardness]

Where does one acquire a dildo ballista? Asking for a friend.

Sadly, you have to use off-the-shelf ballistas but they work surprisingly well at both getting out aggression as well as entertaining you. Plus it cuts down on the trips to the gym!

[awkwardness]

This company might be the funnest place to work as it gets a lot of aggression and suppressed feelings out while paying you to do something that's easy yet frowned upon by uptight people.

[Perfectly Reasonable]

I note that the cannon lacks a recoil mechanism, but it has a muzzle brake.

[Gnabberwocky]

Okay, burning question. Does Applied Dildonics actually sell its sex toys, or do they just manufacture them for the sole purpose of destroying them in exciting ways?

[shanejayell]

THAT'S a thing. *lol*

[Gyrre]

Where does one acquire a dildo ballista? Asking for a friend.

Sadly, you have to use off-the-shelf ballistas but they work surprisingly well at both getting out aggression as well as entertaining you. Plus it cuts down on the trips to the gym!

Jörg Sprave could probably whip one up.

[Is it cold in here?]

(sorry, no poll - I'll leave that to the more experienced thread starters)

I can add one. Would you like me to?

[DaiJB]

Where does one acquire a dildo ballista? Asking for a friend.

Sadly, you have to use off-the-shelf ballistas but they work surprisingly well at both getting out aggression as well as entertaining you. Plus it cuts down on the trips to the gym!

Jörg Sprave could probably whip one up.

Or tell Colin Furze, this sort of thing would be right up his alley...

[_Islanio]

Where does one acquire a dildo ballista? Asking for a friend.

Sadly, you have to use off-the-shelf ballistas but they work surprisingly well at both getting out aggression as well as entertaining you. Plus it cuts down on the trips to the gym!

Jörg Sprave could probably whip one up.

"This is the instant dildolas. Let me show you its features!"

[Wingy]

Knowing Pintsize he'd welcome some nice malware

The last time he ran into Malware, it took Marigold's skills to get him cleaned out.

[hedgie]

"Crump"?

[Roborat]

That looks like a fun tour, kinda want to go on it myself.  Also, I really want to open that locker with the "do not open" sticker.

[Gnabberwocky]

Comic's up.

Okay, here's a poll idea: would having an automatic steamed milk dispenser attached to your torso be really awesome or really inconvenient?

[awkwardness]

I note that the cannon lacks a recoil mechanism, but it has a muzzle brake.

It's compressed air so probably doesn't need it...they want all of the force going forward for the testing so recoil probably isn't wanted or needed there. Plus it's a heavy base bolted directly to the concrete floor so the base and floor are absorbing the shock.

Comic's up.

Okay, here's a poll idea: would having an automatic steamed milk dispenser attached to your torso be really awesome or really inconvenient?

...wouldn't that get hot and scald the rest of the milk or is it in a separate insulated teet?

[shanejayell]

Clinton: "WHAT."

[Scarlet Manuka]

Comic's up.

Okay, here's a poll idea: would having an automatic steamed milk dispenser attached to your torso be really awesome or really inconvenient?

I think I'd vote for "really dangerous".

[Gus_Smedstad]

Lewis Black has a bit where he explains that there's no such thing as Almond Milk, because "there ain't no almond titties!"

Apparently he was mistaken.

[badbum61]

(sorry, no poll - I'll leave that to the more experienced thread starters)

I can add one. Would you like me to?

Please feel free!
I'd LOVE to know what the other teats do...

[St.Clair]

Don't ask questions you don't want to hear the answers to.

[Mordhaus]

Which one dispenses Chocolate Milk? 

[Farideh]

Top left: chocolate milk
Top right: whipped cream

[Gyrre]

She's getting revenge on him for something he did as a kid, isn't she.

[awkwardness]

She's getting revenge on him for something he did as a kid, isn't she.

Nah, she's overcompensating for being abused for years by her ex...the fact that it irks Clinton in the cutest way possible that only a mom could get at is a fringe benefit

[Shjade]

Was not expecting to find out Clinton's mom is More Online than I am, but there it is.

[Perfectly Reasonable]

Because almond milk looks totally different from regular milk. That's why.

[Mr_Rose]

Lewis Black has a bit where he explains that there's no such thing as Almond Milk, because "there ain't no almond titties!"

Didn’t some idiot try to get something along these lines passed into law a while back? In one of the southern us states, I mean.
Something about consumer confusion over the origins of almond milk vs cow’s milk…

[Gus_Smedstad]

My understanding was that it wasn't so much idiocy, so much as commercial interest. That is, lobbyists for dairy producers have been trying to get laws like that on the books. The cited reason was "confusion," but it's really just protecting the branding and health connotations of milk.

They aren't entirely wrong. Milk - cow, goat, what have you - has lots of things in it that aren't in substitutes. A lot more protein than almond milk, for example, though Soy is fairly comparable in that regard. Milk naturally has calcium in it. Substitutes often add calcium, but it's not there to start.

Milk evolved as a complete food. Baby mammals survive on nothing but milk. Various milk substitutes never are. They aren't intended to be, if you need to raise a baby and don't want to use milk, you use formula, not almond milk.

[awkwardness]

Lewis Black has a bit where he explains that there's no such thing as Almond Milk, because "there ain't no almond titties!"

Didn’t some idiot try to get something along these lines passed into law a while back? In one of the southern us states, I mean.
Something about consumer confusion over the origins of almond milk vs cow’s milk…

It was the USDA and it was because the dairy industry was behind it claiming "consumer confusion" over milk being anything but lactated fluid from a mammal. It was all about protecting their herds and nothing else...agriculture has a huge pull in politics, with both parties.

[Morituri]

So Pintsize buys bodies from the back of some guy's van - of course he does, what else would a Pintsize do? 

What'll ya bet he discovers that it's May's old chassis, with a different dermal covering and no boobs?

[Farideh]

I kinda doubt that, May's old chassis burst into flame. Probably wasn't salvageable after that.

[SmilingCat]

I kinda doubt that, May's old chassis burst into flame. Probably wasn't salvageable after that.

I have to assume that May's chassis was lightly refurbished and immediately handed off to the next parolee as a cost saving measure by robot Jail.

[John Allenson]

New comic.

I like Clinton and Elliot in this, particularly the facial expressions in panel four.

On the topic of the dairy industry protecting itself against substitutes; I found out that under Ontario law margarine may not be coloured to be mistakeable for butter.  It either has to look like lard or be a bright yellow.

[cesium133]

Wisconsin had a law like that for a long time. There was a black market of yellow margarine smuggled in from Illinois.

Also, thinking of Ontario, I’m a bit disappointed that you can’t buy butter in sticks here, only in one pound* blocks.

* Well, 454 grams. Sort of a half-assed way to convert to metric.

[Farideh]

Well done on your personal growth Clinton! Once upon a time you would have blabbed the details of your mother's hobby to anyone who asked.

I have to assume that May's chassis was lightly refurbished and immediately handed off to the next parolee as a cost saving measure by robot Jail.

I really hope that isn't true.

[Gnabberwocky]

I have to assume that May's chassis was lightly refurbished and immediately handed off to the next parolee as a cost saving measure by robot Jail.

I really hope that isn't true.

We all know it probably is, though...