Topic: Worst song lyrics ever written (Read 41005 times)

glwtta · « **Reply #50 on:** 17 Apr 2007, 19:23 »

The worst lyrics ever?

I'm pretty sure that humps and lumps thing is in the running:

Quote

Get you love drunk off my hump.
My hump, my hump, my hump, my hump, my hump,
My hump, my hump, my hump, my lovely little lumps (Check it out)

...

I mix your milk wit my cocoa puff,
Milky, milky cocoa,
Mix your milk with my cocoa puff, milky, milky riiiiiiight.

I know, it's provocative.

TwilightParade · « **Reply #51 on:** 17 Apr 2007, 20:49 »

My Chain My Chain Dont You Like My Chain Mane Young Gucci Mane And I'm Poppin Off The Chain Mane And My Jacob Is So Fruity Call Me Gucci Mane Or You Call Me Gucci Gucci

Done, and done.

But if it has to be from a band whose market isn't purposefully shitty music that's only good for grinding, I guess I'd have to say Smashing Pumpkins - I Am One. I like the song A LOT but the one line "try to find messiah in your trinity your city to burn etc..." always seemed kind of typical goth metal rock boohoo i hate my life god is stupid and doesn't exist kind of thing....but I still like the song. Just think those words are kind of lame.

anditsdiscontents · « **Reply #52 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 02:53 »

Roddy Woomble of Idlewild, despite his awesome name, is notorious for very, very bad lyrics which I submit are worse than Paul Banks. See American English from their The Remote Part record:

Quote

Songs when the truth are all dedicated to you
In this invisible world I choose to live in
And if you believe that now I understand
Why words mean so much to you, they'll never be about you

Maybe you're young without youth
Or maybe you're old without knowing anything true
I think you're young without youth

Then you contract the American dream, you never look up once
You've contracted American dreams,I require you to stop and look up

Sing a song about myself, keep singing the song about myself
Not some invisible world

Constantly searching to find something new
But what will you find when you think that nothing's true?
Maybe it's that nothing is new
So you let me hear songs that were written all about you
The good songs weren't written for you, they'll never be about you

And I won't tell you what this means, 'cause you'll already know
And I won't tell you what this means, 'cause you already know

And you came along and found the weak spot,
but you've always wanted
And let yourself be everything, that you've always wanted
It doesn't have to be so decided, you've always wanted
And no need for explanations, that you've always wanted

You'l find what you find when you find there's nothing
And you'll find what you find when you find there's nothing

the whole record, with a few exceptions, has lyrics equally as bad. Titles like I Am What I Am Not are fairly indicative.

Perversely, I still like the record, 'cos it has several moments that save it. Or perhaps it's just anything delivered in an awesome scottish drawl just wins me over.

OtterErotic · « **Reply #53 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 16:55 »

SHOULD BE ME

OtterErotic · « **Reply #54 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 16:55 »

SHOULD BE.... ME

samoasneoartform · « **Reply #55 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 19:38 »

I think Explosions in the Sky has some of the worst lyrics ever. Yes I said it.

well you've got to admit Day 3 sorta annoys you with that background talking, and Have You Passes Through This Night I think is sort of ridiculous, the southern accent sort of annoys me.

and if you didn't know they had like 2 songs with not so much lyrics as weird talking then sorry.

But I was sort of being sarcastic, since obviously they are 99% instrumental

Jackie Blue · « **Reply #56 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 19:48 »

Quote from: samoasneoartform on 18 Apr 2007, 19:38

Have You Passes Through This Night I think is sort of ridiculous, the southern accent sort of annoys me.

1. They didn't write that, it is a quote from the novel The Thin Red Line.

2. They're from Texas, I doubt they can help it if they have accents.

That's probably my favorite EitS song, in part because of the beginning quote.

KharBevNor · « **Reply #57 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 20:05 »

This whole endevaour is silly. How can I possibly fit everything Lily Allen has ever written into one little thread?

Houdinimachine · « **Reply #58 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 20:53 »

In b4 "This shit is bananas"

Thank you, Gwen. Thank you very fucking much.

eveisdawning · « **Reply #59 on:** 18 Apr 2007, 21:14 »

You guys are missing the band that will always end all "Worst Band/Music/Lyrics Ever" threads:

Good Charlotte. Case in point:

Quote

Just because I walk
Like Obi-Wan Kenobi
You people talk
But you don't even know me
And that's alright,
'cause I get down with GC,
So I walk on,
and listen to their CD.
Some people laugh
They do it just to spite me
Behind my back
They don't know what I see
But I don't care what they say
I don't need them anyway
I'll just go about my day
But anyway

samoasneoartform · « **Reply #60 on:** 19 Apr 2007, 15:36 »

Quote from: zerodrone on 18 Apr 2007, 19:48

Quote from: samoasneoartform on 18 Apr 2007, 19:38
Have You Passes Through This Night I think is sort of ridiculous, the southern accent sort of annoys me.

1. They didn't write that, it is a quote from the novel The Thin Red Line.

2. They're from Texas, I doubt they can help it if they have accents.

That's probably my favorite EitS song, in part because of the beginning quote.

Oh I didn't know it was a quote. And yes I know they are from Texas, and I know they have accents, but nonetheless it bothers me in that song. I mean I am from South Carolina, so its not like there are no southern accents here.

Bennett the Sage · « **Reply #61 on:** 20 Apr 2007, 08:38 »

Usually, I dont mind bad lyrics, but I do have to make special mention of a few songs that either leave a bad taste in my mouth or makes me want to take a long shower and scrub until I am raw.

Mindless Self Indulgence's "Faggot". (This is jsut an excerpt, if i put any more than this on, blood will shoot out of my nose).

I - I tried to consume just like a super faggot
I got some dude
How can y'all bring a muthafucka something so good he couldn't say no
You nailed me hard
I love 'em when they don't give a motherfucking shit
I could've been someone instead of falling flat upon my ass

The Lords of Acid's "P***y". (Once again, only an excerpt, but this is all you need to know that this should not be heard near an open flame).

She turns into a tiger when she's ready to eat
My p***y's always hungry for a big chunk of meat
So lay your little p***y right next to mine
You can bring her over around dinner time

Now if youll excuse me, I have to submerge myself in antiseptic...

Desmonkey · « **Reply #62 on:** 20 Apr 2007, 10:57 »

Quote from: eveisdawning on 18 Apr 2007, 21:14

You guys are missing the band that will always end all "Worst Band/Music/Lyrics Ever" threads:

Good Charlotte. Case in point:

here's some more evidence to back that case up;

Quote

You call yourself a lois lane and you're in pain and I'm insane
You don't want my help you don't need my help
I watched you fall down from the sky but I won't cry
I'll just sigh who is gonna save you
Yeah I've heard the talk superman can't walk
And who is gonna save you when your superman can't walk
I saw him just the other day in physical therapy
Sitting in a wheel chair you know I had to stare
And all your friends they think I'm sick they think that I'm insensitive
They don't like the fun I'm poking don't they know I'm only joking yeah
I've heard the talk superman can't walk
And who is gonna save you when your superman can't walk
Call me what you will
I'm doctor evil
Call me what you want
Superman can't walk
And all your friends they think I'm sick they think that I'm insensitive
They don't like the fun I'm poking don't they know I'm only joking
Yeah I've heard the talk superman can't walk
And who is gonna save you when your superman can't walk walk

Luke C · « **Reply #63 on:** 20 Apr 2007, 12:04 »

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nU_a_5Ra8k4

Stewie speaks, all should listen and obey.

Ã¶de · « **Reply #64 on:** 20 Apr 2007, 16:36 »

Taking the piss out of 50 Cents lyrics is like an able person winning the special olympics and gloating about it.

Kai · « **Reply #65 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 06:08 »

Quote from: Hollywood Undead

What! yo This is Da Kurlzz bitch!
We aint just a gang motha fucka, but a way of life!
Yo check it! this is my boy! THA PRODUCA

All you fags on sunset show me where the fuck you at
scene kids ghetto stars come on grab your gats

All the world and Hollywood drinking 40's in the hood
Tila Tila shake that ass like you know you should

All you fags on sunset, show me where the fuck you at
Chad Crews gettin bruised now its time to move

All the world and Hollywood drinking 40's in the hood
Tila Tila shake that ass like you know you should

Hollywood Undead, get it through your head, download this song, put in your IPOD,
fuck that put it on your homepage. you'll be the coolest kid on fuckin myspace.

I'm at the scene club, told Jeffree star to beat it. cause I left her a comment
and saw that bitch delete . and thats fucked up because I sent it from my sidekick
you got beef? meet me on Franklin and highland!!

It's Charlie scene! He aint ever lookin cheesy.
It's Charlie scene! It aint easy being sceney.
If I was you, I'd hate me too. We can take it to the parking like 82, AND BRING YOUR CREW!
And I'd hate to be the one to break the news,
whoever chipped matties tooth
I'll shank you too! BITCH!

That night at 82 the parking lot was stacked
I grabbed my gat and got my hand stamped by matt

I could barely walk around cause the dance floor was so packed
I walked to the back and lit off some black cats - BAP BAP BAP hahaha!

Scene kids, tired of gettin picked on by mean kids
and i'd hate to be obscene kid, but have you scene my penis?
(I HAVE)
I know you have, cause that shit is bomb
My dicks got more friends then Tom
These scene clubs I run these, I should write the book how to be scene for dummies!

Kai · « **Reply #66 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 06:10 »

Quote from: Hollywood Undead

Scene kids, tired of gettin picked on by mean kids
and i'd hate to be obscene kid, but have you scene my penis?
(I HAVE)
I know you have, cause that shit is bomb

Kai · « **Reply #67 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 06:11 »

Quote from: Hollywood Undead

and i'd hate to be obscene kid, but have you scene my penis?
(I HAVE)
I know you have, cause that shit is bomb

amok · « **Reply #68 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 08:16 »

Every Nine Inch Nails song ever.

KharBevNor · « **Reply #69 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 10:02 »

Hollywood Undead are the worst thing. Until you discover Jeffree Star and The Medic Droid.

Johnny C · « **Reply #70 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 10:18 »

yes, but jeffree star should.

Ballard · « **Reply #71 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 10:52 »

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned The Bloodhound Gang yet. Although that's purely intentional.

Quote from: The Ballad of Chasey Lain

Dear Chasey Lain
I wrote to explain
I'm your biggest fan
I just wanted to ask
Could I eat your ass?
Write back as soon as you can

Ã¶de · « **Reply #72 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 13:44 »

Those are fantastic lyrics.

Quote from: amok on 21 Apr 2007, 08:16

Every Nine Inch Nails song ever.

Johnny Cash's cover of Hurt makes up for anything NIN have done.

Ballard · « **Reply #73 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 14:35 »

Trent Reznor has gotten crazier than anyone gave him credit for.

Their new album's coming with an alternate reality game and a creepy internet scavenger hunt. Think "not pr0n challenge" on LSD.

Thrillho · « **Reply #74 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 15:17 »

Quote from: Ballard on 21 Apr 2007, 10:52

I'm surprised nobody's mentioned The Bloodhound Gang yet. Although that's purely intentional.

Quote from: The Ballad of Chasey Lain
Dear Chasey Lain
I wrote to explain
I'm your biggest fan
I just wanted to ask
Could I eat your ass?
Write back as soon as you can

Bloodhound Gang are too funny to be shit. And they are deliberately shit, which also makes them funny. Frankly, even their song and album titles make me crack up. 'Hooray For Boobies?' 'You're pretty when I'm drunk/and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk'? 'I Wish I Was Gay So I Could Get Chicks'?

Ballard · « **Reply #75 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 16:45 »

Quote from: DynamiteKid on 21 Apr 2007, 15:17

Quote from: Ballard on 21 Apr 2007, 10:52
I'm surprised nobody's mentioned The Bloodhound Gang yet. Although that's purely intentional.

Quote from: The Ballad of Chasey Lain
Dear Chasey Lain
I wrote to explain
I'm your biggest fan
I just wanted to ask
Could I eat your ass?
Write back as soon as you can

Bloodhound Gang are too funny to be shit. And they are deliberately shit, which also makes them funny. Frankly, even their song and album titles make me crack up. 'Hooray For Boobies?' 'You're pretty when I'm drunk/and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk'? 'I Wish I Was Gay So I Could Get Chicks'?

Totally agree with you, man. But they still deserve honourable mention in this thread.

amok · « **Reply #76 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 17:11 »

Quote from: öde on 21 Apr 2007, 13:44

Johnny Cash's cover of Hurt makes up for anything NIN have done.

The cringeworthy lyrics kinda detract from Cash's awesomeness. I kinda like a lot of NIN as long as I don't pay attention to the words but since that tune's got jack shit but crooning, it's just plain awful, whoever sings it.

Hat · « **Reply #77 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 18:32 »

Quote from: The Tin Lids

OPEN THE DOOR
GET ON THE FLOOR
EVERYBODY DO THE DINOSAUR

Kai · « **Reply #78 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 20:29 »

fuck you man

alongwaltz · « **Reply #79 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 20:37 »

I'm going to take the easy way out and say anything by Anal Cunt.

KharBevNor · « **Reply #80 on:** 21 Apr 2007, 21:29 »

Worst lyrics, not best lyrics.

fish across face · « **Reply #81 on:** 22 Apr 2007, 00:48 »

Quote from: Hat on 21 Apr 2007, 18:32

Quote from: The Tin Lids
OPEN THE DOOR
GET ON THE FLOOR
EVERYBODY DO THE DINOSAUR

Is that different from Was (Not Was)'s Walk the Dinosaur? If so, that's extra worrying.

The Was (Not Was) song goes:

Open the door
Get on the floor
Everybody walk the dinosaur

Jackie Blue · « **Reply #82 on:** 22 Apr 2007, 12:46 »

Dude, Was (Not Was) gave us "Spy in the House of Love" and the utterly incredibly "Dad, I'm in Jail", so I'm willing to get "Walk the Dinosaur" pass.

Near Lurker · « **Reply #83 on:** 22 Apr 2007, 14:35 »

One word: Sk8terboi

Hat · « **Reply #84 on:** 22 Apr 2007, 16:12 »

Quote from: fish across face on 22 Apr 2007, 00:48

Quote from: Hat on 21 Apr 2007, 18:32
OPEN THE DOOR
GET ON THE FLOOR
EVERYBODY DO THE DINOSAUR
Is that different from Was (Not Was)'s Walk the Dinosaur? If so, that's extra worrying.

The Was (Not Was) song goes:

Open the door
Get on the floor
Everybody walk the dinosaur

That actually makes a lot of sense, even though I've never heard of that band in my life. I was talking about the version done by Jimmy Barnes' spawn, The Tinlids.

Ã¶de · « **Reply #85 on:** 22 Apr 2007, 16:14 »

Quote from: Near Lurker on 22 Apr 2007, 14:35

One word: Sk8terboi

Will's cover makes it awesome.

Near Lurker · « **Reply #86 on:** 23 Apr 2007, 16:28 »

Yeah, well, the April Fool's cover had be liking both My Humps and Alanis Morrisette, which is no mean feat...

Jackie Blue · « **Reply #87 on:** 25 Apr 2007, 20:33 »

Quote from: DynamiteKid on 21 Apr 2007, 15:17

Bloodhound Gang are too funny to be shit. And they are deliberately shit, which also makes them funny.

Bloodhound Gang are so unfunny I want to personally murder every one of them. When did "pretending" to be homophobic sexist sixth graders become "funny"?

Plus, their music is lame-o-riffic.

SciWed · « **Reply #88 on:** 25 Apr 2007, 22:35 »

b-a-n-a-n-a-s.

Desmonkey · « **Reply #89 on:** 26 Apr 2007, 08:13 »

Quote from: DynamiteKid on 21 Apr 2007, 15:17

Bloodhound Gang are too funny to be shit. And they are deliberately shit, which also makes them funny. Frankly, even their song and album titles make me crack up. 'Hooray For Boobies?' 'You're pretty when I'm drunk/and I'm pretty fuckin' drunk'? 'I Wish I Was Gay So I Could Get Chicks'?

i'm with you on this one, Bloodhound Gang is awesome. i love 'I Wish I Was Gay So I Could Get Chicks'.

fearghal · « **Reply #90 on:** 26 Apr 2007, 13:55 »

im hot cause im fly, you aint cause you not.

if the grammatical errors in this one sentence won't make your head explode, then the horrible beat will.

*pop*

oh great.

Ballard · « **Reply #91 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 09:55 »

"You ain't cause you isn't" would be funnier.

Oh, and to give people a taste of The Bloodhound Gang:

"If your ass is a Chinese restaurant I'll have the poo-poo platter.
My friend Jerry Vandergrift kissed me in Home Ec. class.
Later in the afternoon some jarheads in the locker room kicked my ass.
I said "guys I'm like you- I like Monster Trucks too!
Wanna see how many push-ups I can do?
I just wish I was queer so I could get chicks."

Stryc9Fuego · « **Reply #92 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 11:33 »

Sheryl Crow, Soak Up The Sun. Just for this combination of lines:

I don't have digital
I don't have diddly squat

The words "diddly squat" do not beling in a goddamned song!

A lot of GWAR lyrics could count, particularly off of We Kill Everything.

Thrillho · « **Reply #93 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 15:27 »

Quote from: zerodrone on 25 Apr 2007, 20:33

Quote from: DynamiteKid on 21 Apr 2007, 15:17
Bloodhound Gang are too funny to be shit. And they are deliberately shit, which also makes them funny.

Bloodhound Gang are so unfunny I want to personally murder every one of them. When did "pretending" to be homophobic sexist sixth graders become "funny"?

Plus, their music is lame-o-riffic.

What part of 'I wish I was gay so I could get chicks' is homophobic? Reads to me like a positive.

Anyway, I have no problem with sophomoric humour every now and then. Pull the rod out your ass! Sometimes music that requires no thought is entertaining, particularly between exams.

weenus · « **Reply #94 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 16:06 »

I think this thread has failed so hard for not mentioning...

"SO CUT MY WRISTS AND BLACK MY EYES! (CUT MY WRIST AND BLACK MY EYES!)
SO I CAN FALL ASLEEP TONIGHT, or die...
BECAUSE YOU KILL ME!
YOU KNOW YOU DO, YOU KILL ME WELL,
YOU LIKE IT TOO AND I CAN TELL,
YOU NEVER STOP UNTIL,
MY FINAL BREATH IS GONE!"
-Hawthorne Heights

All along the way, the backup vocals are being shouted in that generic 'BLERGH' screamo voice that studio post-hardcore/screamo bands love to bastardize.

Or, anything off the first Senses Fail ep, regardless of how much I enjoyed it at that time, I always knew the lyrics were dick.

THIS IS WHY IM HOT, by MIMS, as much of a novelty as it is, is hands down the worst set of lyrics I have ever heard. It insults me as someone who enjoys actual hiphop. He even admits it "I can make a mill without even rhyming on the track", yea no shit you talentless, generic FUCK. Nice 4 bar rap song you fucking clown. I hate him.

Anything off of the Fergie album is a joke. Its like 12 songs, where every chorus is just the song title spelled out.

jellybones · « **Reply #95 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 17:13 »

ashlee simpson?

"You make me wanna la la
in the kitchen on the floor
I'll be a french maid
Where I'll meet you at the door
I'm like an alley cat
Drink the milk up, I want more
You make me wanna
You make me wanna scream

You can meet me on an aero-plane
Or in the back of the bus
You can throw me like a boomerang
I'll come back and beat you up"

Instigator · « **Reply #96 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 17:27 »

*Meanwhile, whilst listening to Kaizers Orchestra...*

I nominate Milkshake by Kelis.

What IS that song about, anyways? Titties?

Thrillho · « **Reply #97 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 18:01 »

Quote from: jellybones on 27 Apr 2007, 17:13

ashlee simpson?

She is exempt from this thread due to her glorious rack. Now you shut your mouth and never say another word.

fearghal · « **Reply #98 on:** 27 Apr 2007, 22:12 »

Quote from: weenus on 27 Apr 2007, 16:06

I think this thread has failed so hard for not mentioning...

"SO CUT MY WRISTS AND BLACK MY EYES! (CUT MY WRIST AND BLACK MY EYES!)
SO I CAN FALL ASLEEP TONIGHT, or die...
BECAUSE YOU KILL ME!
YOU KNOW YOU DO, YOU KILL ME WELL,
YOU LIKE IT TOO AND I CAN TELL,
YOU NEVER STOP UNTIL,
MY FINAL BREATH IS GONE!"
-Hawthorne Heights

just mentioning this bile of a group of people who decided to get together, throw up with out stopping for 5 mins at a time, then record it, makes me want to do the same.

seriously....where is the sniper when you need him.

kudos on the MIMS slam. ugh...grrrrrrr

Ballard · « **Reply #99 on:** 28 Apr 2007, 08:40 »

Haha, the emo domino effect.

THESE FORUMS NOW CLOSED (read only)

Author Topic: Worst song lyrics ever written (Read 41005 times)

TwilightParade

OtterErotic

OtterErotic

samoasneoartform

samoasneoartform

Bennett the Sage

Desmonkey

alongwaltz

Desmonkey

fearghal

weenus

jellybones

Instigator

fearghal